Crash & Burn
by brttmclv
Summary: Emilie Ravin has had everything she loved taken away form her. And just when she thinks she found peace, it's ripped away. Can Jack Mercer help her see through her fears? Or will she just crash and burn? Based on Crash and Burn by Savage Garden. COMPLETED
1. Another Angel

I'm sure you've heard all about the horrors of foster care. The families that only foster so they can have a maid to do what they are too lazy to do. I'm sure you've grimaced when you heard about the abuse, sexually, emotionally and physically. I know you've pitied the children that are put through that. Not all foster families are like that. There are some really nice families that make you want to stay there forever. But it's all ruined when you leave. They are just fosters. Not future adopters. It's hard but you get through it, I have.

I had my share of good and bad fosters. My birth mother left me at the hospital just hours after I was born. I don't know much about her but that's my choice. I was put into the system at the mere age of one day old. And I was adopted at two days old by Charlie and Charlotte Ravin. They were amazing, my mother and father. They were just married and had one child but wanted another. My mother had complications with her first born and had to have a hysterectomy. They waited until my brother, Richie, was three to adopt. My mother always told me the moment they saw me they knew I could have been theirs. I looked so much like my mom it was eery. We were a family and they loved me like I was their blood. But when I was nine that family was torn apart.

We lived in Salem. We moved here when I was two. It was nice. It had a lot of history so it wasn't has boring. It was Wednesday night and me and my brother were in a play together. We stayed after school so we could rehearse and our parents were going to come a little early to wish us luck. I should have known something was wrong when they didn't see us before the show. Richie said they were probably already seated and not to worry. We were playing Hey Diddle, Diddle. I was the cat and Richie was the cow. It was the end of the show and my big part came up when I was supposed to recite the poem. I stepped up and the light was shown on me. I looked around to see if I could see my mom and dad. I wanted to see their faces. But I didn't. All I saw was two police officers walking down the walkway to my teacher. She covered her mouth and looked at me. That night wasn't the last time I would cry, feel my heart break or even freeze in the spotlight. There were many more to come.

My parents had died. They were driving to the school and ran into a patch of ice on the road. My dad couldn't control the car and they slid into the railing on the bridge. The impact broke the railing and the car went over into the river. They said the impact killed them and it was quick. I wasn't sure how to take that. I lost another mother and father. The only other family we had was our aunt. She wasn't the motherly type of woman. Mainly to me she wasn't. She didn't like our mother or me. Se told my mom on many occasions she wasn't a woman because she couldn't have children and that they should have left me alone. She said I had bad blood. So it was no surprise when she took Richie and left me in the system, again. Richie screamed and hit her and she drug him away. I wanted to cry but the truth was, I couldn't. I was scared and lonely. My parents had bee taken away and now my brother. I was to frozen to cry, to frozen to fear, to frozen to feel anything. I watched the car drive away and looked down at Mr. Chimpy. Richie had given him to me for my birthday. He helped mom out around the house to get the money and he picked it out. It wasn't anything some would call special but it was to me. It was a simple black teddy bear with a red ribbon around his neck. It was the last thing I would have of my family.

I was quickly put into a foster home and then another and another. It wasn't them that was bad, it was me. I didn't talk, I barley ate. I went to school and came home. Some understood but just couldn't take it and let me go. By the time I was fourteen I had been to twelve different foster homes. People in school didn't believe that I was a foster or in the system. Apparently, I didn't look like that 'type'. I wasn't sure what that meant but teachers didn't see 'How such a beautiful girl could go through much.' Luckily, I wouldn't have to hear that much longer. I was in the group home in between homes and was about to leave to go to another when she came in. Her name was Abigail. She was a social worker and worked in group homes for years. She was getting ready to retire and wanted to adopt before she did. She lived in Cambridge, which was about an hour away. She had heard from an old friend that I was starting high school and was being bounced around a lot. She smiled when she walked through the door and I swear I saw a light around her, like an angel. And that she was. She was my angel and my second chance. Abigail saved me.

I awoke to a very strong smell of coffee and bacon. I smiled and opened my eyes. There stood Abigail with breakfast on a tiny wooden tray. I sat up and leaned on my pillows. I had been with her for nearly three years and a half years. She had taken me to her house and soon it became home. She never pushed me to call her mom nor did she push to act like my mom. She was my mother figure but soon she became more. I trusted her and she trusted me. We talked about her life and what she had done. I told her about my family and what happened. She welcomed me and my demons with open arms.

"Breakfast in bed?" I asked as she sat down on my bed. One thing I loved was that she let me do my own thing. I was a girly girl but I had my little rocker side. My room and wardrobe was the perfect example of that. My walls were a light maroon color with hand painted hearts and stars in certain places. I had white curtains with pinned on flowers. It was very chic and very much me. My clothes well, I had everything. I mixed and matched and sometimes came out looking quite hilarious.

"Today's a big day, Em. You're getting your license. That's a step toward freedom." she smiled and hand my a cup of coffee. I smiled and took it.

"That's if you won't get all emotional and turn around like last time." I teased. She gasped and put a hand to her chest in mock surprise.

"Me? All emotional? Never." she joked. "No, we're getting it this time. You're seventeen and you know how to drive, so there is no reason that you shouldn't get it." she told me. I smiled and picked at my eggs.

"Promise you won't make up some excuse and turn around?" I asked pointing my fork at her. She laughed and stole a piece of my bacon. I slapped her hand and she laughed.

"I promise. And if I do I promise it will be better than last time." she smiled. I choked on my coffee and remembered her excuse for last time. We were nearly there and out of the blue she pulls a u-turn and heads for the market. She said she had to do grocery shopping because today was the day the truck unloaded and it's better to shop when it's first unloaded.

"Yes, please. That was a bust and you know it." I said wiping the coffee off my chin. She smiled softly and looked away. I knew she was getting ready to cry and I put my hand over hers.

"It's just that you're growing up so fast." she told me softly. I rubbed her hand and moved my tray to the side.

"I was already grown when you got me, mom." I told her. She laughed and looked at me.

"You thought you were grown. You were still very much in need of a mother figure." she smiled. I scooted over to her and hugged her.

"And I got one. And you did a damn good job." I whispered. She laughed into my shoulder and pulled back. I wiped a few tears away and smile.

"I tried. But I'm so proud of you. You've gone from a hurt little girl to a very smart young woman. I'm just happy you let me in." she said holding my hands.

"I thought you were an angel. You had this light around you. It wasn't hard for me to trust you. I love you, mom." I told her and smiled. She hugged me again and stood up.

"I love you too. Now eat and get ready. I want to get this over with, and quick." she said and left. I smiled at the door and looked over at my tray. I ate the rest of my eggs and bacon and set it on my bedside table. I finally got up and walked to my closet. I pulled out a pair of dark wash skinny jeans and a white pair of flats. I grabbed my favorite yellow and white stripped shirt and pulled it over my head. I pulled my dirty blonde hair out of the pony tail and put a little gel in. I fluffed it with my hands let it fall. I put on some lip gloss and nodded ay my reflection.

"I'm ready. Don't back out now!" I yelled walking down the stairs. I walked into the living room and saw Abigail waiting by the door. I smiled and walked over to her. "Ready?" I asked sweetly. She rolled her eyes and smiled.

"Not really. But let's go."

We left and drove the ten minutes to the DMV. We didn't have to wait long and I was ready to go. I gave Abigail a hug and took the keys. I walked with the instructor to the car and got in. I made sure my seatbelt and his were on. I checked my mirrors and made sure the car was in park before I started it. I pressed the brake and turned the key. I slowly backed out and made my way down the street and did as he told. We made small talk as I drove down the block and back. I pulled back into the parking lot and parked. He handed me a piece of paper and got out. I looked at the paper and squealed.

"I passed!" I smiled and jumped into Abigail's arms. I hugged her and kissed her cheek.

"I'm so proud of you. You did great." she beamed and kissed my head. We walked over to the desk to get my license and left about fifteen minutes later. We walked out and she handed me the keys. I smiled and jumped in the driver's seat.

As I was driving home I saw her steal glances at me. I smiled knowing she was still getting used to seeing me driving. It was a step toward freedom, as she said earlier. It was another step closer to being an adult and taking care of myself.

"You wanna go out to dinner later?" I asked as we pulled into the driveway. She un buckled her seat belt and smiled.

"I think that's a great idea. We'll go to Little Marie's Diner down on Main St." she told me. I smiled and got out. We walked in and the phone started to ring.

"I got it." I told her and ran to grab the cordless. "Hello?" I answered.

"Hello, is this Abigail's number?" a sweet female voice asked.

"Yes it is. Can I ask who's calling?" I asked.

"Ah yes. This is Evelyn Mercer, an old friend." she told me. I smiled and looked around the corner at my mom.

"Ok, one second, Miss. Mercer." I told her and held the phone to my chest. "Mom!" I called out. She walked around the corner and grabbed the phone. I smiled when her face lit up at the old friend. I walked upstairs and threw myself on my bed. I felt a lump under my head and pulled Mr. Chimpy out. I held him up and smiled.

I still missed them. There wasn't a day that I didn't think about them. I wondered if my parents were proud of me and if they were watching over me. I thought about how life would have been like if the hadn't have died. I think about Richie mostly. Where he was and if he was ok. I wondered if he remembered me and if he missed me. After all, I was his little sister. He knew that I wasn't blood related but it never stopped him from treating me like his blood sister. He yelled at me, pulled my hair, called me names like all big brothers do. But he also loved me, protected me and taught me how to play games like older brothers did.

I felt my eyes burn and sighed. I set the bear on my night stand where he had always been and sat up. I looked around my room and let my stare fall on my picture wall. The picture wall was a wall, duh, with loads of pictures, duh again. I had ones that I had stolen from my aunt before I was taken away and ones that my parents had given me. There were ones of me from the day I came home to the day before they died. I had numerous baby pictures of Richie and plenty family photos at holidays and birthdays. I also had pictures from my time with Abigail. My sweet sixteen and my first high school dance. Our trip to New York and Orlando. It was a wall of memories.

"Em, you okay?" Abigail asked from my door. I smiled and pointed to my wall.

"Just looking at the pictures. Enjoy your talk?" I asked as she leaned in the doorway.

"Yes, that was an old friend in Boston. I worked with her for years until I retired." she smiled.

"Does she still work?" I asked. She shook her head.

"No, she quit after she adopted her last son. She wants to meet next week. She'd love to meet you." she told me. I nodded and got up.

"I'd like that. I'd love to hear those incriminating stories of the wild days." I laughed. Abigail shook her head and turned around.

"Get dressed, I'm about to starve." she said and walked down stairs. I smiled and got up to get dressed. I kept my jeans but changed into a grey off the shoulder sweater. She let me drive to the restaurant and she smiled the whole way.

"It's just my licence." I told her as we walked into the diner. She frowned at me.

"Wait, until you have children. What seems small now is bigger than life then. And you will give me grandchildren one day." she told me. I rolled my eyes and sat in the booth. We ordered and talked about the lady that had called earlier.

"We worked together in Boston forever. She was one of my closest friends. I trusted her with everything. I still do and we haven't talked in years. She adopted four boys of her own. They were bounced around like you and took them in." she told me.

"She sounds nice. I'd love to meet her." I smiled.

"She is. She's a saint. Took those boys in when no else would." she shook her head lightly. I knew her passion for children and her bigger passion for ones that were hurting. It was her life and that's all she cared about. She had dealt with so many children in her life and she finally got the chance to get the chance to have one with me.

"Thank you." I told her as we were leaving. She looked over at me and smiled.

"For what?" she asked. I stopped and grabbed her hand.

"For taking care of me. And for loving me when I didn't think it was possible." I smiled softly. Her eyes sparkled with tears as she hugged me.

"No, thank you for letting me in. You have no idea how much you mean to me, Emilie. I love you like you are my own." she whispered. I pulled back and smiled.

"I am yours." I told her and wiped a tear away. We walked back to the car and she got into the driver's side. She said she didn't want me driving this late and dark at night.

We were driving down the highway when I started to nod off. I laid my head on the seat and listened to Abigail hum to the music. I felt a bump and opened my eyes. We looked behind us and saw a box in the road.

_I open my eyes  
I try to see but I'm blinded by the white light  
I can't remember how  
I can't remember why  
I'm lying here tonight_

"It's just a box. I tried to miss it." she said looking over at me. "Go back to sleep, dear." she smiled. I smiled and looked forward to see a semi-truck crossing into out lane. I saw the bright lights in our faces as I screamed.

"Mom!" I screamed as she turned back to the road.

_And I can't stand the pain  
And I can't make it go away  
No I can't stand the pain_

She turned the wheel to the right but the wheel jammed. I screamed as we slid sideways and into the oncoming truck. I heard the brakes from the truck but you can't stop something that big that fast. It felt like the life was knocked out of me when the truck smashed into us. I heard the breaking of glass and the crushing metal all around me. I felt the car stop moving and closed my eyes. My sides were killing me and my head hurt. I felt hot drops of blood stream down my face and started to cry. I opened my eyes and tried to focus. Everything was foggy and flashing before me.

_How could this happen to me  
I made my mistakes  
I've got no where to run  
The night goes on  
As I'm fading away  
I'm sick of this life  
I just wanna scream  
How could this happen to me_

The only thing I heard was the faint sound of the trucks engine. I titled my head to the side and looked over at Abigail. The truck had hit on her side. I saw her head facing me and blood dripping off her chin. I sobbed and frantically tried to move. I jerked the seatbelt out of the buckle and unwrapped it from myself. I pushed myself out of the window and fell to the ground. I got on my feet and looked around. I could still see the smoke from the brakes of the truck. I let out a frustrated scream and limped over to my mom's side of the car. There was about two feet between her car door and the trucks front. I squeezed in between them and felt her neck.

"It's ok mom. I'm getting you out." I whispered when I felt a faint pulse. I got her seatbelt loose and started to pull her out the car. I saw lights from behind me and turned to see man running towards me.

_Everybody's screaming  
I try to make a sound but no one hears me  
I'm slipping off the edge  
I'm hanging by a thread  
I wanna start this over again_

"Please, my mom. She's hurt." I called out to him. He pushed me aside and pulled her the rest of the way out. He carried her to his car and set her down. I sat next to her and pulled her in my lap. I rubbed her face and cried.

"Mom, please." I whispered. "Please, stay." I heard sirens and bright lights filled the air. I held her as people filled the empty dark road. A man came over and took her from me and felt her neck again. He looked at me sadly.

_So I try to hold onto a time when nothing mattered  
And I can't explain what happened  
And I can't erase the things that I've done  
No I can't_

"She's gone." he whispered. I looked at him for a second and scared myself when I let out a loud wail. He waved another man over and he picked me up and carried me to an ambulance. He set me on a bed and put a mask on my face. I looked behind him and saw the other man covering my mom's body with a white sheet. I felt more tears fall as the doors were closed.

"Are you okay?" the man asked me. I looked at him and shook my head. He nodded and gave me a sad smile. He knew my answer. I laid back and looked at the light on the ceiling. He hooked me up to an IV and started cleaning my wounds.

"Was she your mother?" he asked softly. I nodded and winced when he pulled a shard of glass out. "I'm going to need some information, ok?" he asked again.

_How could this happen to me  
I made my mistakes  
I've got no where to run  
The night goes on  
As I'm fading away  
I'm sick of this life  
I just wanna scream  
How could this happen to me_

"What happened?" he asked.

"We hit a box in the road and turned to see it. When we turned backed around the semi was weaving in our lane. She tried to swerve but the wheel jammed." I squeezed my eyes shut and breathed in. "I heard his brakes squeal but he was going to fast. All I saw was his lights as he hit us." I told him. He put his hand over mine and rubbed it.

"If it helps, I don't think she felt a thing." he told me. I nodded and turned away. "I'll get the rest of your information at the hospital. Just rest."

I felt my eyes get heavy and figured he had gave my pain medicine. I let my eyes fall shut and wished that when I woke up it would all be a dream. I prayed that I wasn't alone again and that Abigail would be okay when I woke up.

I made my mistakes  
I've got no where to run  
The night goes on  
As I'm fading away  
I'm sick of this life  
I just wanna scream  
How could this happen to me

I groaned and tried to open my eyes. I opened them and blinked a few times trying to adjust to the bright light. I fixed my sight and looked around the room. I felt tears fill my eyes and blinked them away. I was in the hospital room. I slowly sat up in the bed, careful not to snatch the wires and IV out. I winced as I leant down on my wrist. I picked it up and notice a brace. I sighed and pressed the call button next to my bed. I waited a few minutes until a nurse walked in with a water bottle.

"You're up, how are you feeling?" she asked. I glared at her and grabbed the water she held out to me.

"Like I got hit by a semi. Where's my doctor?" I seethed. She swallowed hard and walked out the room. I drank my water and looked around. It was nice, I guess. It had pretty plain walls but ti had a few chairs and a table. They had curtains hanging up and a tiny cot in the corner. I looked to my left and saw my purse and clothes in a pile in the chair.

"Hello, Emilie." I heard a man's voice say. I looked at the door and saw an old man with a white coat on. "I'm Dr. Tanner. How are you?" he asked sitting on a stool next to my bed. He took my arm and pulled the IV out.

"Fine, I guess." I told him. He nodded and wrote down a few numbers on his clipboard.

"Well, you seem fine. There was no internal bleeding. Just a few scratches and a sprained wrist. You'll need to keep pressure off of it and keep the brace on for three weeks." he told me. He took his glasses off and sighed. "I'm sorry about your mother, Emilie. If you wish to see her later, I'll show you down there. Do you have any family you can call? Anyone you can stay with?" he asked. I let a few tears fall and shook my head.

"I was adopted. She was all I had." I said softly. He nodded and put his glasses back on.

"I'll have to call social services, you know?" he asked. I nodded and wiped my tears away. I was going back again. I was going back to hell. "I had a few officers go get you some fresh clothes. You can get dressed and the social will be here in a few minutes."

I nodded and watched him leave. I pulled the rest of the wires off my body and sat up. I walked over to the door and locked it. I pulled the curtains closed and grabbed my clothes.

"Must have been a female cop." I mumbled as I put on my black shorts and red tank top on. I grabbed my flats and slipped them on. I piled my clothes in a bag and walked back to the door. I opened the door slowly and peeked out. I was not going back to that hell. Abigail saved me and I wasn't going back. I snuck out the room and walked down the hallway to the elevators. I pressed the down button and looked around nervously. I saw the button start yo crawl back down to my level when I heard the doctor call me.

"Emilie, the worker...no! Emilie!" he yelled as I took of down the hall. I ran through the stairwell door and ran down the steps. I heard the door open and saw two men chasing me. I saw the sign that had main floor and pushed them open. The force hit me so hard I fell but quickly got up. I ran toward the exit and got about 100ft from until I was thrown to the ground. A security guard had tackled me from a hallway. I screamed and kicked trying to get him to let me go but he held on tighter.

"Emilie!" Dr. Tanner yelled breathlessly running over. "Don't hurt her. She's just scared." he told the guard. He loosened his grip but still held onto me. A lady walked up beside the doctor and smiled.

"Emilie, I'm Jessica Wade. I'll be your new social worker. I know you've been in the system before but it'll be okay." she told me calmly. I glared at her and shook my head.

"Bullshit! I won't go back." I cried. Dr. Tanner walked off and gave me one last smile.

"Emilie, you'll be fine. It's changed since you've been adopted." she tried to convince me. She sighed and looked at the guard.

"No, please. I can't go. I have five months until I turn 18. I can do it on my own, please." I begged her. She shook her head.

"I'm sorry. You have to come with us." she told me firmly. "Take her to my car." she ordered the guard. He started pulling me out the doors. I screamed and jerked in his grasp.

"Stop it! You can't do this! Please!" I yelled. Jessica shook her head and followed us out the door. "You can't do this!" I screamed.

"Yes, I can!" she yelled back. I saw the look in her eyes that was in all the other social's eyes. She tried to play nice and then turned when you didn't go along.

"Like hell you can!" Came a semi-familiar voice. The guard stopped and I turned to see an old lady with white hair walking to us. I tried to place her voice and my eyes widened when it clicked.

"And who are you?" Jessica asked. I looked between them and the lady smiled.

"Evelyn Mercer. Emilie's new guardian." she said with a smile. I felt the guard loosen his grip and I wiggled away. I rubbed my arms and looked over at Evelyn. She smiled and held her hand out to me. I felt tears fill my eyes and looked back at Jessica and smirked.

"I told you I wasn't going back." I spat at her. She glared at me and then at Evelyn.

"How do you figure that Miss. Mercer?" she asked snottily. Evelyn handed her a piece of paper.

"This is a copy of her will, says that I get her possessions and custody of Emilie if something were to happen before she was 18. It is already notarized by the state and my lawyer." Evelyn told her. Jessica huffed and shoved the paper back at her. She looked at me and smiled.

"Looks like you got a get outta jail free card. Have a nice life." she said and walked off. I glared at her retreating figure and turned to look at Evelyn. She smiled and stuck her hand out again.

"I'm Evelyn. I'm sure Abbi told you about me." she said. I looked at her hand. I moved it as I went in to hug her.

"Thank you. Thank you so much." I cried into her shoulder. She held me tight and rubbed my back.

"It's alright dear. Everything will be okay. I promise I won't let you or Abigail down." she whispered. I pulled back and smiled at her.

"I wanna see her. Before we go, I wanna say goodbye." I told her. She nodded and grabbed my hand.

"Mind if I come with you? I have a few words to say too." she asked. I nodded and started to walk inside.

"Of course. I don't think I can do it by myself." I told her with a small smile. She patted my hand and walked in with me. I saw why Abigail liked her. She was a soft spoken yet stern woman. She reminded me a lot of Abigail. I smiled and blinked away a few tears. I missed her already.

_Spend all your time waiting  
For that second chance  
For a break that would make it okay  
There's always one reason  
To feel not good enough  
And its hard at the end of the day  
I need some distraction  
Oh beautiful release  
Memory seeps from my veins  
Let me be empty  
And weightless and maybe  
Ill find some peace tonight_

_In the arms of an angel  
Fly away from here  
From this dark cold hotel room  
And the endlessness that you fear  
You are pulled from the wreckage  
Of your silent reverie  
You're in the arms of the angel  
May you find some comfort there_

_So tired of the straight line  
And everywhere you turn  
There's vultures and thieves at your back  
And the storm keeps on twisting  
You keep on building the lie  
That you make up for all that you lack  
It don't make no difference  
Escaping one last time  
Its easier to believe in this sweet madness oh  
This glorious sadness that brings me to my knees_

_In the arms of an angel  
Fly away from here  
From this dark cold hotel room  
And the endlessness that you fear  
You are pulled from the wreckage  
Of your silent reverie  
You're in the arms of the angel  
May you find some comfort there  
You're in the arms of the angel  
May you find some comfort here_

Songs: Untitled by Simple Plan & Angel by Sarah McLachlan


	2. Breakdown

I walked down the long white hallway and held my arms to my body. It slowly started getting colder the further down we got. It was like we were taking our last walk. It was such a cliche to the morgue. I could see Evelyn taking deep breaths and trying to calm down. I knew she was hoping to see Abigail again but not under these terms. At least, I got to say how I felt before. At least we were left on good terms. I watched the man push open a set of doors and walk inside. We followed him and he stopped at one last door.

"You ready?" he asked softly. I looked over at Evelyn and we nodded to the man. He held the door open as we walked in.

I shivered as we walked in. It was freezing and all white. The only color was the silver of the drawers that held the bodies. Evelyn grabbed my arm and looked at me nervously. I covered her hand with mine and watched the man walk over to a table. He looked up at us and grabbed the top of the sheet. He looked away as he pulled the sheet from her face. I shook my head and looked away as her face appeared. Evelyn hugged me as I started to cry.

"Cover her back up." Evelyn whispered to the man. I sobbed into her shoulder as he pulled the sheet back over my mother's face. He guided us out the room and walked away. Evelyn rubbed circles in my back and whispered in my ear.

"It's okay, dear. She's better now. She's watching over you now. I'll take care of you, I promise." she whispered. I waited until my tears stopped to pull away from her.

"What do I do now?" I asked. She smiled sadly and grabbed my hands.

"You're coming home with me. We'll stay here tonight to pack your things. Abigail wanted to be buried in Boston and I will take care of the funeral." she told me. I nodded and wiped my face.

"I'm sorry if I'm an imposition. Mom told me you have four boys." I told her as we walked out the hospital and to her car.

"Oh you're not an imposition. Besides, my boys are grown now. Granted they still act like children and live with me, they are grown." she smiled. I laughed and buckled my seatbelt.

"I always told mom that I'd never leave. Said I'd make he take care of me forever." I whispered the last part as tears filled my eyes again. Evelyn reached over and patted my hand and smiled.

"It'll get better. I promise, it will get better." she said softly. I nodded and looked out the window. I watched the trees and houses blur by and found it oddly familiar. This is what my life felt like. Like one big blur. Someone would come in and love me unconditionally and then they would be taken away. After that everything seemed like a blur until someone else showed up. I sighed and laid my head on the glass. I didn't realize I had fallen asleep until Evelyn woke me up.

"We're here, Emilie." she said shaking me softly. I stretched my arms and opened the door.

I stepped out and looked at my house. I felt a shiver crawl up my spine and took a deep breath. I walked up the steps and took my key out. I let the metal slide in the lock and opened the door. I walked in and took my coat off. I looked around and it felt different. It already felt empty. It already felt like it wasn't home anymore. I sniffed and turned to look at Evelyn who was staring at me.

"How far away do you live?" I asked softly.

"About 20 minutes." she replied. I looked up at her with pleading eyes.

"I can't stay here." I whispered. She walked over to me and hugged me.

"Let's get some clothes to last a few days. We'll come back for the rest when we have more help to move. Plus I need to clean out the extra bedroom." she told me. I nodded and pulled back.

"I'll be right down." I told her and walked upstairs.

I pushed the door open to my room and looked around. I sighed and grabbed a duffle bag from the top of my closet. I grabbed a handful shirts, pants and underwear and threw them into the bag. I took a few of my pictures from my wall and grabbed Mr. Chimpy. I walked into the bathroom and got my shower things and put them into the side pocket. I avoided anything that felt like home or reminded me of what happened. I grabbed the bag and took one last look before I headed back downstairs.

"I'm ready." I announced as I walked into the living room. Evelyn wiped her face and stood up. I set my bag down and walked over to hug her. "She was so excited to see you again." I whispered. She held onto me as she cried.

"I should have called sooner. We didn't live far away." she cried softly. I rubbed her back and tried my best to comfort me as she did me earlier. She pulled away and smiled.

"At least you called." I told her. She nodded and walked to the door.

"Let's go. We'll be back for the rest later." she said. I picked my bag up and walked out the door. I threw my bag in the back and sat down.

I watched my house fade into the darkness as we drove away. When it was out of my sight I laid my head back and closed my eyes.

* * *

I watched her fall asleep and smiled. She had been through so much I was surprised she was able to sleep. Jack wasn't able to sleep for weeks after I had gotten him and Angel had nightmares like no other. It was something new with each one but I took my time and slowly they came around. Emilie seemed like she had already taken to me but she didn't have the abusive past that my boys had. She was bounced around but it was death that followed her around. In her short 17 and a half years she had lost a total of three mothers and two fathers.

She had lost everyone she loved and had a brother out there somewhere. Abigail had told me about her looking for the right child. She was in Boston when she heard about Emilie. She drove all the way to Salem to meet her and wanted her the moment she laid eyes on her. She was beautiful. She didn't look like she had been through the system and back. Abbi told me she was in over ten homes and everyone of them gave her back. She said she came around well. Said Emilie took to her fairly quick and was a smart child. I didn't doubt it. She was sweet but I also knew there was a tough side in her.

"Home sweet, home." I said as I pulled up to my house. I saw Emilie still sound asleep and quietly got out the car. I walked up the steps and opened the door. I walked in and looked in the living room to find my oldest son, Bobby, watching tv.

"Where have you been?" he asked when he saw me. I heard foot steps behind me and saw Jack, my youngest boy.

"I'll explain in the morning but I need one of you to get someone out the car." I told them. They both gave me weird looks and walked to the door. I followed them outside as the peered into the car.

"It's a girl." Bobby stated. Jack laughed and I walked over to get her bag.

"Yes, it's a girl. Now someone get her and take her inside." I told them. I saw Bobby walk away ad Jack sighed. "Thank you, Jackie." I smiled. He nodded and opened the door. He picked her up in his arms and carried her to the door.

"Who is she?" Jack whispered as we walked into the living room. I set her bag down and made Bobby move so Jack could set her down.

"Emilie." I told them. Bobby looked her over as Jack laid her on the couch.

"Why do you have to adopt the pretty ones?" Bobby asked. I smacked his arm and sat down.

"I'm not adopting her but she's only 17 so watch yourself. Remember Abigail?" I asked them. They nodded and kept looking at Emilie. "This is her daughter. I'll be taking care of her until she's 18." I told them. Bobby snapped his head up and Jack lowered his.

"What happened to Abbi?" Bobby asked. I sighed and looked at Emilie.

"She was killed last night. Her and Emilie were in a car accident." I told them softly. "I'll need help cleaning out the guest room. It will be here room from now on. We'll move her stuff in a few days."

"Alright, well I'm going to bed now. Night, ma. Night fairy." he said and walked out. Jack sighed and I smiled.

"I'm sorry about Abbi, ma." he whispered. I smiled and looked over at him.

"It's alright. Do you mind if she sleeps in your room tonight?" I asked him. He shook his head and looked over at her.

"I don't mind. You think she'll be okay?" he asked looking at her. I smiled and nodded.

"She'll be fine. She's hurting but she hasn't been through as much as you or your brothers." I told him. He looked over at me and frowned.

"What has she been through?" he asked. I smiled and nodded at Emilie.

"Ask her. I'm going to bed. Before you go put her in your room please." I said and kissed his head. He nodded and I walked upstairs.

* * *

I stared at her sleeping form on the couch and sighed. She was way too pretty to be put through the system. But I knew Abigail. She could change anyone and make them feel at home. She was like my mom. Sometimes I wondered if they were the same people. I stood up and walked into the kitchen. I opened the fridge and grabbed the milk jug. I started to drink and nearly choked when I heard a voice behind me.

"Excuse me?" the voice asked. I spit the milk out on the counter and coughed. I turned to see Emilie standing at the door way. She walked over and patted my back. "Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you." she said softly. I coughed again and put the milk up.

"It's fine. I just left and you were sleeping." I laughed. She smiled and looked around. "You okay?" I asked. She smiled shyly.

"Where's your restroom?" she asked. I smiled and walked past her to the stairwell.

"Second door on the right." I told her. She smiled and walked up. I watched her until she was gone and smiled. She was very pretty. I shook my head and walked back into the living room. A few minutes later she came back down and walked into the living room. She stopped at the door and looked at me.

"I'm Emilie." she said softly. I smiled and scooted over on the couch. She walked over and sat down.

"I'm Jack You thirsty?" I asked. She nodded and stood up. I got up too and laid my hand on her shoulder. "I got it. Pepsi ok?" I asked. She nodded and sat back down. I walked in the kitchen and grabbed a glass and soda. I poured her drink and walked back into the living room.

"Thanks." she said and took it from me.

"For future reference, the cups are right next to the fridge." I told her. She smiled and set her glass down. "You feeling okay?" I asked pointing to her wrist.

"Yeah. I got meds in my purse. I'll take one before I go to sleep." she told me. I nodded and leaned back into the couch. We watched a little bit of tv before she spoke up again.

"How old are you?" she asked. I looked over and smiled.

"Turned 22 about a week ago.. You?" I asked even though I already knew.

"I'll be 18 in July." she said. I nodded and flipped the televison off.

"So you won't be here for too long, huh?" I asked. She looked down and sighed. "I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to, god, I'm an ass." I mumbled. I heard her laugh and looked over at her.

"It's ok. I shouldn't be here that long. But apparently she's addictive because you and your brothers still live here." she joked. I laughed and leaned back.

"She feeds us well. But she'll let you stay as long as you want." I told her. She nodded and looked away.

"Umm where am I sleeping tonight?" she asked. I stood up and held out my hand. She grabbed it and stood up.

"My room. Ma said we're cleaning out your room tomorrow." I told her as I walked upstairs.

"Where are you sleeping?" she asked. I looked down at her and smiled.

"Where you were sleeping about 30 minutes ago." I said. She frowned and stopped on the step.

"That's not fair. I can sleep down there, I'll be okay." she told me. I smiled and leaned against the wall.

"Let me be a gentleman. I'll have my room back tomorrow." I told her. She bit her lip and sighed.

"Fine. But only this once." she said. I nodded and walked into my room. I held the door open and scratched my head.

"So I'm a guy, my room is a mess." I told her. She laughed and walked in. She looked around and nodded.

"It's not so bad. I could deal without the clothes all over the place but you're a guy. I think I can forgive that." she smiled. I laughed and nodded my head. I walked over and grabbed a pillow from my bed and turned to face her.

"Ma is in the room next door. Bobby is across that hall. He's loud in the mornings so be warned. I'll be on the couch if you need anything." I told her. She nodded and crossed her arms.

"Alright." she whispered. I smiled and walked to the door. "Jack." she called softly. I looked back at her. "Thanks." she said softly.

"You're welcome. Night, Emilie." I said and closed the door.

I leaned against the door and shook my head. I walked downstairs and fell onto the couch. I laid there and thought about her for a while. She didn't look like someone who had been hurt too terribly bad but looks can be deceiving. She was definitely a lot more trusting and calm towards other people. I didn't even want to look at Evelyn when she got me. I had been through so much in so little time I never thought I'd trust again. But Evelyn changed that. She showed me what it was like to be loved and card for. She showed me what it was to be wanted. Evelyn saved me.

* * *

I groaned as I rolled over onto my wrist. I opened my eyes and looked around. I yawned and got out of bed. I walked over to the tiny mirror in Jack's room and fixed my make-up and hair to look tame. I opened the door and peeked out. I didn't see anyone so I stepped out.

"Whoa! Jackie's not a fairy!" a man exclaimed. I jumped and looked behind me to see a tall black man standing at the end bedroom smiling at me.

"Excuse me?" I asked confused. He smiled again and walked over to me.

"You Jackie's girl?" he asked. I realized what he meant and shook my head.

"No, no. I'm Emilie. I'm staying here for a while." I told him. He gave me a confused look and laid a soft hand on my shoulder.

"Apparently, I missed something. Everyone's downstairs. I'm Angel by the way." he said smiling. God, he had some white teeth. Mine aren't even that pretty. I smiled back at him and he walked me downstairs. "For a minute I thought Bobby was wrong about little Jackie." he announced walking into the kitchen. Everyone looked up and Evelyn frowned.

"Angel, be nice. Good morning, Emilie. Did you sleep well?" she asked me. I nodded and sat next to Angel at the table.

"Yeah. Do you know where my purse is? My wrist is killing me." I asked wincing as pain shot through my left hand.

"Oh yes, here you go dear. Are you hungry? I made bacon, eggs and pancakes." she smiled. I wasn't really hungry but I know I needed something.

"Sure. I'll make me something in a minute." I told her. She shook her head and walked into the kitchen.

"Nonsense, I'll make it. You sit and take your medicine." she told me. I smiled and shook one of the pills out and popped it in my mouth.

"So why is she staying here?" Angel piped up. "No offense." he directed to me. I shook my head saying none taking.

"Abigail was my mom." I told him before Evelyn could say anything. They all looked at me. I knew eventually I would have to tell it on my own.

"Was?" he asked softly. I nodded and put my pills up.

"We had an accident and she passed away two nights ago." I whispered. He set his fork down and looked at me.

"I'm sorry. Abigail was a sweet lady." he told me. I nodded and smiled at Evelyn when she set my plate in front of me.

"So Emilie, incase you haven't been introduced. This is my oldest son Bobby, that is Jack and of course Angel is next to you. I have another who lives with his wife and two children. His name is Jerry, he will be over later. Boys, Emilie will be staying with us for a while. I expect you to welcome her and not run her off, Bobby." she smiled and directed the last part to Bobby.

I smiled and started to eat. I actually got a better look at everyone today. Evelyn was a sweet looking woman. Short, with white hair. Angel was tall and strong. And I was thinking he was in the army by the necklace he was wearing. Bobby looked like a grease monkey. His dark hair all slicked back with gel and this mean facial expression. He just didn't look nice. Jack, well Jack was a different story. He didn't look nearly as tough as his brothers. He had this pseudo punk style. He even had the messy but tame hair style going on. I really didn't realize how good he looked until today. His skin and eyes shown bright as the warm morning sun hit his face. Evelyn raised some fine looking boys.

"So when do you need us to clean out the guest room?" Bobby asked over his coffee.

"Soon. I wanna move her stuff out of her old house sometime today. I figure someone could stay here and clean out that room. While someone goes with us to help us move." she told him. I finished my food and started to stand up.

"I got it." Jack said and reached for my plate. I smiled and sat back down.

"Thanks." I said softly.

"Me and Jerry will stay here and clean the room out. Let Fairy and Angel go with you and Emilie." he said. I saw Jack glare at him and walk out. I watched him leave and looked back at the table.

"Bobby, stop that." Evelyn scolded him. Bobby sighed and stood up to go after him. I looked over at Angel and saw him staring at me.

"What?" I asked. He laughed and took a bit of pancakes.

"You won't survive here." he said truthfully. I frowned and crossed my arms.

"Why's that?" I asked. He dropped his fork and smiled.

"You're a girl. A tiny girl at that. We are rough and rowdy. You won't survive." he told me. I smiled and shook my head.

"I think I can pull my own. And you might be rough, rowdy boys but you still jump when Evelyn says jump." I teased. He laughed and shook his head as I stood up. I walked by the living room and saw Bobby watching tv. I walked upstairs and knocked on Jack's door.

"Come in." he yelled. I pushed the door open and saw him on the bed with a guitar. He had a cigarette hanging from his lips as he messed with the strings. He looked up at me and waved me in. I walked in and shut the door. "Have a seat." he said and moved his legs. Another thing I didn't realize was how deep his voice was.

"You play?" I asked and pointed to his guitar. He looked up and smiled.

"Yeah. Sing and write too." he said and put his cigarette out. I scooted against the wall and crossed my legs.

"You any good?" I asked. He looked up at me again and smiled.

"Some say I am, some say I'm not." he said casually. I smiled and tapped his foot.

"Well, let me hear whatcha got." I told him. He laughed and nodded.

"Alright." he said and pulled a few strings.

_Open up the book you beat me with again.  
Read it off one sentence at a time.  
I'm tired of all the lines,  
Convictions and your lies.  
What right do you have to point at me?_

_Well, I'm sitting alone thinking about it all over coffee.  
And still crowdin' my space are the things you still hold against me.  
You cannot save me._

_Well, it's not the time to breakdown.  
It's not the time to breakdown.  
It's not the time to break up this love,  
Keep it together now.  
It's not the time to break._

_Read it all, no need for separating here.  
You see what you want and try to justify.  
All your little lines,  
Convictions and your lies.  
What right do you have to point at me?_

_Well, I'm sitting alone thinking about it all over coffee.  
And still crowdin' my space are the things you still hold against me.  
You cannot save me._

_Well, it's not the time to breakdown.  
It's not the time to breakdown.  
It's not the time to break up this love,  
Keep it together now.  
It's not the time to break._

_Open up the book you beat me with again.Read it off one sentence at a time._

_Well, it's not the time to breakdown.  
Well, it's not the time to breakdown.  
Well, it's not the time to breakdown.  
Well, it's not the time to breakdown.  
Well, it's not the time to break up this love,  
Keep it together now.  
Well, it's not the time to break,  
Breakdown._

I couldn't hide the smile as he sang. I clapped playfully as he finished. He laughed and put his guitar down.

"You're good. So you put that all together?" I asked. He nodded and lit another cigarette. "That's good." I told him.

"Thank you. You sing or play anything?" he asked. I dropped my head and he sat up quick. "Sorry. I'm sorry." he apologized. I sighed and shook my head.

"Ask me that later on down the road, ok?" I asked. He looked at me for a minute and nodded.

"I will." he said. He looked like he was about to say something when his cell rang. He held up a finger and answered it. A smile grew on his face as he talked. When he said baby and I love you, I figured it was his girlfriend. He hung up and looked over at me. "I gotta go. I'll be back when we go to move." he told me and left. I sighed and laid back on his bed. I laid there and played with my hair until I heard a knock at the door.

"Yeah?" I called. The door opened and I saw Bobby.

"Where's Jack?" he asked. I sat up and looked at him.

"I think his girlfriend called. He said he'd be back in time to move." I told him. He grunted and rolled his eyes.

"I wouldn't call her a girlfriend. She's worse than Sofi" he mumbled. I smiled.

"Who's Sofi?" I asked. He walked in and sat in a chair.

"Sofi is a girl Angel used to fuck around with. She's crazy. The girl Jack has been seeing is Lydia. She's a skank from hell. But Jackie is blind." he told me. I laughed and leaned back on the bed. Maybe Bobby wasn't that bad.

"Do you have a girlfriend?" I asked. He laughed out loud.

"No, no offense but woman get on my nerves. Again no offense I'd rather go have a quickie than a relationship." he smiled. I laughed again and shook my head. "I'm not all mean, Emilie. Ma's told me a little about you. If you need anything come to me. I've been there too, trust me." he said softly. I nodded.

"Thanks, Bobby." I said softly. He nodded and got up to leave.

"No problem, kid." he said and walked out. I laid back down and stared at the ceiling.

Everything was changing again. I had a new home and a new life now. I was hoping I would never have to have one again but I guess no one listened. I felt tears fill my eyes again as I thought about life without Abigail. I'd never see her again. If only I hadn't asked her to go for dinner. We should have ordered in. But she was so excited to see me drive. I grabbed Jack's pillow and cried into. A few minutes later I felt and big hand on my back and looked up. I saw the sad eyes of Jack Mercer staring at me. He pulled me up and wrapped his arms around me. I clung to him for dear life as I cried into his shoulder.

"I don't know what to do anymore." I cried softly. He rubbed my back and leaned back onto the bed.

"It's ok." he whispered. "Just remember that you're not alone, ok?" he asked. I looked up at him and nodded. I laid my head back on his pillow and sniffed a few times. I hated this. The changing of life so fast that you can't get a grip. It was getting old and it was getting there fast.

**Breakdown by Daughtry**


	3. Men

I sat in the middle of the floor and looked around, my new room. It was finally done after a whole day of moving, unpacking and yelling at Bobby. He had become quite annoying through out the day. I couldn't tell you how many times Evelyn had smacked him or how many times I had hit him with his own hockey stick. Angel cheered me on and Jerry scolded him. Jerry seemed like the most put together of the four. He had his life right. He had a wife and two small kids. He came from nothing to have everything. It was nice to see that life can change for the better. Even though mine seemed far away from it. And that's what I thought about sitting out my window. I thought about my life and how tragic it had become. A country artist would love to hear my story, they would have a big hit.

"BOO!" Came a deep voice and hand around my waist. I jumped and nearly fell off the roof but Jack held my arms. "Sorry. Somehow I didn't think that would happen." he laughed and sat down next to me.

"Really? You didn't think scaring the living hell out of someone on a roof would nearly make them fall? Yeah, I didn't seem to think of that either." I said sarcastically. He laughed and lit a cigarette.

"Want one?" he offered. I pushed them away and smiled.

"I like my lungs all bubble gum pink, not black as night. But thanks anyways." I said sweetly. He shook his head and looked around.

"You can't hide." he told me softly. I bowed my head and played with the shingles on the roof.

"I can try." I whispered. He grabbed my hand and pulled me to look at him. He looked at my straight in the eyes and frowned.

"Don't try. There's no point. It's always going to be there and if you try to hide it, it'll be worse when it does find you. Trust me, I know." he told me. I looked away and sniffed.

"I don't think I can do it, Jack." I confessed. He wrapped and arm around me and hugged me.

"Yes, you can. You got Ma. Hell, you got me and my brothers now. You'll be fine." he told me and stood up.

He crawled back inside my window and I looked down at myself. It had taken me nearly half and hour to get the courage to put these freaking clothes on. The simple black skirt and black wrap top that usually went so well with other pieces now looked so dull put together. I vowed to throw them away after today. After the funeral. I sighed and crawled back inside. I walked over and slipped on my black heels and grimaced as I looked in the mirror.

"I look horrible. Why do funeral's have to be so depressing?" I muttered to myself. I looked in the corner of the mirror and saw Evelyn standing there. I bit my lip and wiped my tears away. She walked over and laid her hands on my shoulders and smiled sadly.

"It'll be okay." she said softly. I nodded and turned around.

"Everyone keeps saying that and each time it sounds further away." I whispered. She patted my cheek and smiled.

"But it will." she said and hugged me. I hugged her back and grabbed my purse when we pulled away. "Ready?" she asked.

"Not really but yeah." I laughed. She nodded and we made our way downstairs. I nearly dropped my jaw when I saw all of the boys wearing slacks and button up shirts.

"Bobby cleans up nice, huh?" I smiled. He gave me a glare and grabbed my shoulder.

"I only plan on doing this once. So don't get used to it." he told me. I laughed and turned around. We walked outside and I saw two cars.

"You can ride with me if you like." Jerry said walking up behind me. I nodded and walked with him and Evelyn to his car.

"So she's too good to ride with us. I see how it is Emilie." Angel yelled getting into Bobby's car. I smiled and closed my door.

We drove in silence to the cemetery. I kept seeing Evelyn and Jerry shoot me glances from the front and sighed. Every mile we drove got closer and closer to the thing I dreaded most in life. I was losing another parent for good. I knew death was out there and I knew that one day Abigail would be taken from me, I wasn't naive to not believe that. But why now? Why so soon? And why a car accident? I didn't understand but when have I ever understood when my family was ripped from me. It's happened too many times and I was afraid it would happen more.

"Emilie, we're here." Evelyn said. I broke my thoughts and stared out the window. There was quite a few people here, most likely Evelyn and my mom's friends from work. I went to grab the handle when the door opened. I smiled at Jack's face. He laid one arm on the top of the frame and looked down at me.

"You're riding with us on the way back. I need company." he smiled. I laughed and nodded my head. I stood there in the door for a minute until he held a hand out. "It's time to go." he whispered. I swallowed and stared at his hand.

_I don't wanna see, I don't wanna see anything  
I don't wanna be, I don't wanna be lost again  
I don't wanna walk, I don't wanna walk far from You  
I just wanna live, I just wanna live like You do_

"I can't." I whispered. He kept his hand out and stared at me.

"Yes, you can. And you need to. Abigail needs a goodbye from you of all people. I'll be right next to you and Ma will be on the other side." he told me.

I slowly grabbed his hand and he wrapped his fingers around mine. He moved back to help me out the car. I stepped out and sighed when my feet touched the ground. I looked at Jack and he nodded. I let his hand go and walked up to Evelyn. I grabbed her hand and we sat down. Jack did as he said, he sat one side while Evelyn sat on my other. Angel, Bobby and Jerry stood behind me. Everyone got in their places as the minister said he words. They were all a blur though. I wasn't paying attention to him. The only thing I saw was the gleaming silver casket in front of me. The one that held my mother.

_As I stumble to the light of grace  
You said You'd always have a place for me  
Got a little scared, got a little scared in the woods  
And everywhere I turn, everywhere I turn nothing's good_

Memories started flashing through my eyes as I stared. The first time I had met her. The look in her eyes when I first called her mom. They way she held me tight when I woke up in the middle of the night. The way she was so patient when all I could do was think about was Charlotte and Charlie. She had it all. She was everything. It felt good to have her in my life and now she was gone. Now I could only hope that my life would still be okay with just memories of her.

_Then I saw a little light, saw a little light shine for me  
And I found a little path, found a little path at my feet  
As I fumble with the gift of my free will  
He says hush now, listen to my voice, be still_

I felt Bobby's hands on my shoulders as they started to lower her into the ground. My heart dropped lower with each crank of the lift. I watched as the casket slowly went deeper and deeper into the ground until it was completely gone. I shook my head and stood up. Evelyn grabbed my hand and squeezed as a few ladies came over. They talked about how amazing she was and how much she would be missed, like I didn't know that. But they talked and I nodded. And when they left so did I.

I walked away from the group of people and made my way over to a tiny brush of trees. I stood behind a tree so hopefully no one would see me and closed my eyes. I took deep breaths and let the serene feeling take me over. I was almost there when I heard his voice.

_My refuge, my Father  
The only Living Water  
I'm weary, I'm broken  
I've cracked my heart wide open_

"You okay?" he asked. I laughed and looked over at him.

"I'll be fine if everyone quits asking me that." I told him. He nodded and leaned on the tree.

"I'm not okay, Jack." I whispered after a few minutes. "I feel like I'm falling and there's no ground to catch me. I've had to bury my parents before and I'm tired of it. I'm tired of losing everyone I care for. Losing everyone I love and need. It's making life unbearable." I cried. I sat down on the ground and cried into my hands. He sat next to me and pulled me to his side.

_Unholy, unworthy  
And still You reassure me  
You knew me  
Before I new myself  
I don't wanna be, I don't wanna be lost again_

"I know, trust me. I haven't had any parent's to bury mainly because I've never had any. Evelyn's been the only one who actually cared. But Emilie, you have to let us help. We've been through it all before." he told me. I sighed and lifted my head to look at him.

"How many homes did you have?" I asked. He laughed and lit a cigarette.

"Too many. I had at least two a year." he told me. I nodded and looked at the ground.

"How did you get to leave?" I asked softly.

"I'd run away. I'd get in trouble and they'd move me." he said exhaling the smoke.

"Why did you run?" I asked again. He looked over at me and smirked.

"You sure are full of questions." he said. I blushed and he continued. "I'd get tired of the beatings and run." he finished softly.

"I'm sorry." I whispered. He shook his head.

"Not your fault. Did they ever hit you?" he asked me. I sighed and sat up straight.

"A few did. Nothing horrible though." I confessed.

"No matter how hard or how much they do it, it's horrible." he growled. I looked over and tilted my head at him. His eyes were darker now.

"Maybe we should get back." I said standing up. He nodded and stood up. I laughed and looked up at him. "I didn't realize you were so tall." I told him.

"I didn't realize you were so short." he laughed. We walked off and met back up with Evelyn.

"Are you okay?" she asked as I walked up. I nodded and saw Jack walk off to Bobby's car.

"I'm fine, a little tired but fine." I told her. She smiled and waved the boys over.

"I'm ready to leave. So let's go." she said. Before I could even take a breath Jack grabbed my arm and pulled me over to Bobby's car. I laughed as he playfully shoved me in the backseat.

"Are they that scary, Jack?" I teased. He looked over at me and smiled.

"Bobby and Angel are horrible." he laughed.

And soon I figured that out. As time went by the days got easier and less empty. I got closer to all the boys and even closer to Evelyn. I'd babysit Amelia and Daniella for Jerry and Camille to make a little money. Angel found out he would be deployed in six months and I held Evelyn as she cried that night. Bobby was home less and less and when he was home he slept or drank himself stupid. At times I felt a little alone. Everyone was older and had things to do. I was barely 18 and home schooled. God, I needed friends and a life.

"So did Abbi school you?" Jack asked after staring at me for a few minutes. I was sitting on my bed doing some math work when he appeared at me door. I looked up and nodded.

"Yeah. But after a while I started doing it myself." I muttered trying to concentrate. He stood there and stared at me.

"You don't have a life do you? You've been here two weeks and you haven't been out once." he told me. I sighed and threw my pen down.

"Don't you have better things to do than sit around bugging me?" I snapped.

He glared at me and walked out slamming my door behind him. I threw myself back on my bed and sighed. I got up and walked to my door. I opened it and heard a faint strumming from Jack's room. I walked over and knocked on the door. I heard the strumming stop and then his door swung open. He leaned against his door and glared at me. I crossed my arms and stared at him.

"I'm sorry." I apologized. He stared at me for a second like he was analyzing of I was lying or not.

"It's alright. But you do need a life." he told bluntly. I glared at him.

"I don't know anyone here. And I don't even go to school so I can't meet anyone." I defended. I smirked.

"Hang out with me." he offered. I laughed and he glared again.

"You're like four years older than me. And I'm not even 18 yet. You must have better things to do than hang out with me." I told him. He continued to glare.

"I think you should know I like your company. I find you quite amusing and fun to be around. And if you didn't want to hang with me, you could have just said so." he said and closed the door in my face. I stood there shocked and brung my fist up and banged on the door.

"Jack!" I called through the door.

Silence.

"Jack, come on. I didn't mean it like that." I called again.

Again silence. I sighed and kicked the door.

"Jack! Open the fucking door. I'll go hang out with you, okay? I need a life, help me get a life." I yelled. I heard footsteps and a smug looking Jack opened the door.

"Do ya mean it?" he asked pouting his lips slightly. I rolled my eyes and nodded. He smiled and grabbed my arm. He drug me downstairs and opened the door.

"Where are we going?" I asked as I walked out after him. He grinned at me and kept walking. "Jack, tell me." I whined and stopped on the sidewalk.

"Keep whining and I'll take the long way." he warned. I sighed and ran to catch back up with him. I walked along side of him and tried to take in the streets and scenery.

"I'm guessing people don't move here for the scenery, huh?" I joked. He laughed.

"No, people move from here mostly. They'd be crazy to move here." he told me. I nodded and nearly fell when he grabbed my arm and pulled me to the side.

"What..." I started but stopped when Jack put his hand over my mouth. I looked at him with wild eyes but he was staring elsewhere.

"Shush." he whispered. He kept staring and I moved forward to look at what he was seeing. I saw a girl and some guy totally going at it. I wanted to gag but the hurt look on Jack's face stopped me.

"That's my girlfriend." he laughed sadly. I felt the blood boil in my veins and glared at Jack.

"Aren't you going to do something?" I asked. He looked at me and glared.

"Like what? Confront her?" he asked. I waved my hand in the air and laughed at his stupidity.

"Uh yes! She's cheating on you in plain sight and all you can so it shush me and laugh about it? Are you demented?" I asked him. He rolled his eyes and looked back at Lydia and that guy.

"I know she's like that. I just never saw it. We..." he sighed. "We have an open relationship." he told me slowly. I gaped at him.

"An open relationship?" I repeated. He nodded his head and blushed slightly.

"Yeah it's where-" he stared but I hushed him with my hand.

"I'm might be younger than you, but I'm not stupid or naive." I told him. He nodded slowly and looked away. "Why?" I asked.

"I don't know. I don't want a serious relationship." he told me.

"Not every relationship has to be serious, Jack." I cried out. He was insane.

"I know but I don't know. It's just like that okay." he raised his voice.

"I can't believe you. First Bobby tells me he'd rather get a hooker, then he tells me Angel fucks around and now you only want 'open relationships'." I finger quoted the last two words. He glared at me.

"Don't judge me, Emilie." he growled.

"Well you make it kinda hard not to." I retorted. He huffed and turned around. I watched as he walked away. "So you're just gonna walk away?" I yelled.

He kept walking and I stared at his retreating figure. I sighed and slowly followed him. We were about half way home when I looked up and didn't see him. I started to panic and looked around. I wrapped my arms around myself and called out.

"Jack?!" I called and walked a few more steps. I felt and hand go over my mouth and one around my waist. I tried to scream and it was muffled. Then I heard that deep laugh. I pushed myself out of the captor's arm and looked at him. "JACK!" I screamed as he laughed.

"You should have seen your face." he laughed. I glared at him and walked off.

"Emilie!" he called after me. I shook my head and kept walking. He ran after me and grabbed my shoulders. He spun me around only to have my palm across his face. He let me go and stared at me.

"You're an ass." I seethed. He rubbed his cheek and nodded.

"I'm sorry. I wasn't trying to scare you." he told me softly. I swallowed and let him hug me. I placed my chin on his shoulder and my hands on his back. "Forgive me?" he asked. I pulled away and saw him pouting.

"I guess. But I'm still mad." I told him pointedly. He smiled and nodded.

It amazed me how close me and Jack had become. I started spending most of my time with him inside the house and out. We made numerous trips to the bowling alley and laser tag warehouse. A few times we even got Bobby and Angel to tag along. But today we decided to try the new billiards club a few blocks down.

"You seriously don't know how to play?" Jack asked as we walked in. I shook my head and looked around.

"Nope. You think they got enough pool tables?" I asked.

"Umm Em, it's a billiards bar. They kinda have to have a lot of pool tables." Jack laughed. I glared at him and walked after Jack to the bar. "Let me get a beer and a water for her." he ordered. The bartender smiled at me and handed me my water.

"I hated being under 21." he told me. I laughed and agreed. Jack walked over to an empty table and set the balls up. He handed my a stick and grabbed his own.

"You're gonna teach me right?" I asked. He nodded and came around to my side.

"Alright, we gonna play 8-ball. I'll break and whatever I sink in, solid or stripes, is what I play. If I sink both I get to choose. If you knock a ball in, you get another turn unless you knock the white ball in. That's called a scratch. If you scratch the other player gets a ball in hand, they get to move the white ball where ever. Got it so far?" he asked. I bit my lip and recanted.

"Whatever you knock in is yours. Scratching is bad. Ball in hand also bad. Pretty simple." I told him. He smiled and sipped his beer.

"Good. Now everyone holds their stick a different way." he said. I smirked and winked at him.

"Oh really now?" I asked. He grinned and pointed at me.

"Shut it. You know what I meant. Now whatever feels right to you is how you hold it. I hold mine on my thumb and wrap my finger over it." he sais still grinning.

"I didn't know pool was so dirty." I laughed. He dropped his head and laughed.

"Yeah, me either. But you pointed it out. Now get a feel for it." he told me. I kept my comments to myself and leaned over the table to test my hold. I fiddled a few minutes and sighed.

"I'm not gonna be good at this." I declared. He laughed and set his beer down.

"Here. Let me show you." he said. He set his pool stick to side and walked over to me. He stepped behind me and put his arms along side mine so I was between his.

"Don't fight me." he whispered as he pressed himself against my back and leaned me over. He slid his hands over mine and moved my right hand closer to the end of the stick and my left on up a littler further. He laid the stick over my thumb and wrapped my finger over the top.

"That's how I do it." he told me. I shivered feeling his warm breath on my neck and nodded. "Now, I'm going to help you break. So just go with it, ok?"

I nodded and let him lean over me just a little more. He clasped his hands over mine and started to move the stick slowly at the white ball. I felt his break on my neck as jerked the stick forward and hit the ball. We leaned up and watched it fly into the other balls knocking them all over.

"You knocked in a solid. Wanna take another shot?" he asked. I nodded and held my stick the way he showed me. I moved it slowly and tried to shoot but failed. I sighed and dropped my head on the table. I leaned up quicky and turned around but my breath caught as I stared at Jack only an inch from my face. He had moved behind me to show me again when I turned around. Thus leaving us really close and facing each other.

* * *

I stared at her in front of me. I could almost feel her breath on my lips. I swallowed and tried my hardest not to do anything stupid. And my conscience didn't help.

_'Kiss her, Jack! She's right there.'_ one voice yelled.

_'She's 17, you're 22, not a good idea.'_ the other yelled.

_'Aww she's close enough to 18. It's not like she's innocent.'_ the first yelled.

_'And how would you know? Have you kissed or slept with her. No!'_ the second yelled.

I shook the voices out and listened to the more sane of the two. I stepped back and looked away. I was about to say something when I heard my name being called. I looked up and saw Lydia walking over. I sighed and looked over at Emilie who was glaring at me.

"Jack! Baby, I didn't expect..." she started and then looked over at Emilie. "Well, who's this?" she asked snottily. Emilie raised a brow and stared at me.

"Lydia, this is Emilie. Emilie, this Lydia." I introduced them. Lydia looked her over and looked back at me.

"Where did you pick her up from?" she asked me sweetly. I held my breath and looked back at Emilie.

"Why don't you ask me?" Emilie spoke up. Lydia smirked and turned on one foot to face her.

"Because I didn't want to. But since you are right there, where did Jack pick you up?" she asked. I saw the anger rise in Emilie as she bit the inside of her cheek.

"I'm just a friend. No need to get your panties in wad, that is if you're wearing any." Em smiled. I grinned and turned around whistling.

"Ahh so she's got jokes. Jack why are you with her?" Lydia asked turning to me. I turned back around and rubbed my head.

"Huh? What, oh why is she with me? We uh, we were just hanging out. She didn't know how to play pool." I stuttered. She gave me a curious look and looked back at Emilie.

"Well, I think she knows enough. How about you ditch her and we can hang out?" she asked seductively. I swallowed hard as she slipped her hand up my shirt. I saw Emilie turn red and throw her stick down.

"Yeah, go Jack. I'm leaving anyways." she said and walked off. I wanted to go after her but Lydia's hand ventured down and I cursed myself for being a man. I looked down at her and smirked.

"Your place?" I asked. She grinned and shook her head.

"No, here." she whispered and pushed me to the bathroom. I fell against the wall as she locked the door. I smirked and pushed her against it and let my hands make their way up her dress. Emilie should have been on my mind but she wasn't. The only thing I thought about was me being buried deep inside of Lydia in the men's bathroom. And that also should have made me feel sick but it didn't. Maybe Emilie was right, I was crazy and mostly likely demented.

* * *

I stormed out of the pool hall and started walking. Part of me wanted him to come after me but the other part knew he wouldn't. I expected this from Bobby and maybe even Angel but not Jack. I was beyond pissed. I was hurt and I felt like an idiot. He just let me walk away so he could do whatever with Lydia. The same Lydia we caught making out with another guy a week ago. She was slowly demeaning the image I had of Jack and he wasn't helping either. And now because of her I was left to walk the streets of Detroit by myself.

"Emilie?" I heard a voice call. I looked behind me and saw Jerry driving up next to me. "What in the world are you doing out here?" he asked unlocking my door. I got in and shook my head.

"Your brother's an asshole." I declared. He sighed and started to drive.

"Let me guess. Lydia?" He asked. I nodded and looked out the window. "I hate that he's with her."

"Oh me too. She walks into the pool hall and he abandon's me. Funny thing is we caught her with another guy last week." I ranted. He shook his head again and looked over at me.

"Don't let this ruin how you see him. It's rare he lets anyone see him with her. Only a few friends. He's not like that, I swear." he told me.

"I know but he just let me walk out and he didn't come after me because she slipped her hand down his pants." I whined. "I thought he'd be better than that."

"He's a man. I'm not condoning what he did. But it's true. Men switch when sec is involved. It was you or sex." he told me honestly. I rolled my eyes and looked away.

"Men disgust me." I stated. He laughed and kept driving.

I looked out the window as we drove home. The more I sat and thought about it the more hurt I was. He had begged me to go out with him last week and now he ditches me for a quickie. He was really making it hard for me not to judge him.

* * *

I stared at myself in the mirror. Never had I been so disgusted in myself. I had many quickies, I many places but never had I been this disgusted by it. I couldn't believe I had let her go into Detroit by herself. I knew there would be hell to pay when I got home. Not only from Emilie but from Ma and my brothers. I had worked so hard to get her to trust me these past month and a half and now I fucked it all up. And above that, I did it for a girl who cheats on me. But now was the time and I had to face it.

"Hello, Jack." Came Ma's voice as I walked in. She was expecting me. I grimaced and shut the door. Her saying my name meant she knew it was me. Which meant one of two things. One, all my brothers were in there or two, she had already talked to them and made them leave. Luckily for me, it was the latter of the two.

"I know, Ma." I whispered as I sat in front of her.

"Apparently, you don't." she scolded. "I told you to watch out for her. You're closest to her. But instead you let her walk the streets of Detroit to spend time with Lydia. I had never seen her this mad before.

"I'm sorry. I don't know what I was thinking." I told her softly.

"Certainly, not about Emilie's safety." she seethed.

"I care about her okay?! I don't want anything to happen to her. I had a lapse in judgement okay. I'm a man so sue me." I yelled. She glared at me and stood up.

"Well you must not care enough because you did it anyways." she told me.

"I'm sorry!! What else do you want me to say?" I yelled waving my hands in the air.

"Nothing, at least not to me." she said. She walked over to the stairs and pointed up. "You hurt her. You need to do some apologizing and explaining. And you need to do it now."

"I will." I promised. I walked over to her and looked up. "You think she'll forgive me?" I asked. She sighed and looked up then back at me.

"There's only one way to find out." she said and walked off. I sighed and walked up the stairs. I walked to her door and closed my eyes. I expected the worst but hoped for the best as I knocked on her door. Never had I wanted to kick myself more when she opened the door. The look in her eyes...It said it all.

Grace by Saving Jane


	4. Three Men & A Girl

After Jerry dropped me off I went up to my room. Jerry stayed long enough to talk with Evelyn, Angel and Bobby. I didn't want to talk about it. I was tired of thinking about because it hurt more. So I sat up in my room for the next two hours cleaning. All that was interrupted by a loud knock at my door. I knew who it was. I sighed and flung the door open.

"Jack." I said solemnly. He dropped his head and sighed.

"Can we talk?" he asked. I looked at him for a minute and nodded.

"Talk." I told him. He just stared at me.

"You're not gonna invite me in?" he asked incredulously.

"Why should I?" I asked crossing my arms.

"Emilie, just let me come in." he begged. I sighed and pushed the door open. I walked over to my bed and he followed.

"Talk." I said again as he sat next to me. He rubbed his head and looked over at me.

"I'm sorry." he apologized.

"For what?" I asked casually looking at my nails.

"You know for what, Em. For letting you leave and fucking around with Lydia." he told me. I nodded.

"Ok." Was all I said. He stared at me again.

"That's it. Ok?" he said surprised.

"What do you want me to do?" I asked standing up.

"Yell, scream, cry or even hit me! I know you're hurting, Emilie. Show it." he told me. I laughed and walked over to my desk and picked up my brush.

"Why so you can mock me more?" I asked cynically.

"Why would I mock you?" he asked walking over to me.

"Why wouldn't you? You had no problem doing it earlier." I yelled.

"I wasn't mocking you, Em. I was an idiot and an ass. I'm sorry." he said softly. I tried to walk away but he grabbed my arms. "Talk to me, please." he begged. I looked up at him with tears in my eyes.

"You did mock me. And worse, you did it in front and because of her." I cried. He held my in place and leaned down a little. "You'd rather be with the girl that cheats on you than the girl that actually gives a damn about you."

"I'm sorry, Em. I really am." he said softly and pulled me to his chest. I wrapped my arms around him and cried.

"It hurt, Jack. As if I didn't feel like a nuisance before, now I feel worse." I told him. He pushed me back and looked at me.

"You never need to feel like a nuisance with me. I just had a lapse of judgement today. I hope you can forgive me?" he asked looking at me. I sniffed and caught his gaze.

"Of course, but you can't keep doing this to me or yourself." I told him. He smiled and pulled me in for another hug. I laid my head on his chest and sighed.

"I know. I really don't know what came over me." he whispered. I smirked and looked up at him.

"Her hand is what came over you." I told him. He rolled his eyes and pulled my head to his chest.

"Okay, so Lydia wasn't the best move I've made." he admitted. I laughed and agreed.

"Ya think?" I asked sarcastically.

"I broke up with her." he told me. "I'm a free man now." he smiled.

"You're not a man, you're a boy." I teased.

"Oh so you're gonna talk smack? I'd like you to know that I am all man." he declared. I pulled away from him and walked to the door.

"And that's why Bobby calls you a fairy?" I laughed and tried to leave. He grabbed mm by my waist from behind and pulled my back to his chest.

"You'll pay for that." he whispered. I wiggled in his grasp but he held me to him. I squealed as he threw me over his shoulder.

* * *

It finally started to feel like Emilie was trusting me again. I hadn't talked to Lydia since that fateful day and I was proud of it. And to make sure I avoided her I made my band change practicing areas. Not that they minded.

"So Jack, when you gonna bed that girl?" Troy asked. I looked over at my drummer confused.

"What girl?" I asked. Troy and our bassist, James, laughed at me.

"You know what girl. Emilie." James told me. I glared at them and turned back to my guitar.

"It's not like that. And even if it was she's too young." I reminded them.

"Only four years." Troy told me. I shook my head.

"Still she's not even 18 yet. I'd prefer not to go to jail." I told them setting my guitar down and picking up my sheet music.

"She'll be 18 in, what, three weeks?" James asked. "Dude, if you don't mark her for yourself, someone else will." he told me.

"Yeah, man. In three weeks, ya girl is free game." Troy laughed. I dropped my music and stood up.

"She's not 'free game' and she's not like that. And if I catch anyone of you bozo's looking or touching her, I'll kill you." I warned them.

"Dude, we won't poach." Troy told me seriously. I sighed and turned around to them.

"There's nothing to poach. She's just..." I paused thinking of something to say.

"To good for us?" James offered. I snapped my fingers at him.

"No offense but yes. She's classier than that." I told them. They laughed and stared at me.

"You've got it bad." Troy declared. I rolled my eyes and picked my guitar up.

"I have nothing." I told them.

"Dude, it's just us. We know you have something for her and not just friendship." James prodded. I turned to them and thought for a minute.

"She's different." I said softly. They smiled and pulled me into a chair. James handed me a beer and I laughed. "So I guess you want to act like Oprah?" I joked.

"Spill your heart honey." Troy laughed. I opened my beer and took a swig.

"Emilie's, not like other girls. She was in foster care but didn't get the bad brunt of it. She just lost her family. Her parents left her and she was adopted by a great family. Then they were killed and her brother was taken away. Now she lost Abigail. She's been through so much in so little time." I told them. They nodded and listened intently.

"But she was never abused like you?" Troy asked. I shook my head.

"She said there were a few slaps but nothing like me." I told them. "She's afraid of getting too close. Everyone she's let in has been taken away. It never fails." I said softly.

"She told you all this?" James asked. I nodded and took another sip of my beer.

"Yep. How did I manage to get hooked on a 17 year old chick?" I laughed.

"You think there is something there?" Troy asked. I thought for a moment and looked at him.

"Sometimes, yeah. But we never and probably won't speak of it." I told them.

"Why?" they asked in unison. I laughed and leaned forward on my knees.

"We just can't. It like we know there is something deeper but we can't say it. We can't go for it." I explained.

"Why? It's right there. She'll be legal soon." James asked confused.

"You can't get into a relationship until you can have one with yourself. I know she's scared. I'm scared. I can't hold someone's heart until I know I can hold anything. She has to come to terms with herself and the fate she thinks she has." I told them. They nodded and looked at me.

"You got it bad." They told me again. I laughed and nodded my head.

"I guess I do." I agreed.

Maybe I did have some sort of feelings for Emilie. Even if I did, I could never act on them. Could I? She had been through too much already. I was never the most trust worthy guy. I know the minute I'd tell her I had feelings for her, I would somehow fuck it up. It never failed. I was a fuck up and the pool hall incident with Lydia was a perfect example. I could never make her happy. Hell, I could barely make me happy.

* * *

I had three weeks until I turned 18. I could not believe I was almost there. Every time I though about it I got happy, sad, excited, scared and happy all over again. It was flood of emotions. Happy because I would be legal. Sad because Abigail missed it. Excited because I knew they were going to throw me a kick ass party. And scared because I didn't know where or what I would do. I didn't want to leach off of Evelyn forever but I didn't have anywhere to go. Abigail never let me get a job because it made her feel like I didn't need her. Plus I knew I had a place with her. I was just unsure of everything now.

"Emilie!" Evelyn called from the kitchen. I stood up and walked into the kitchen. She was leaning over the stove cooking dinner.

"Yeah?" I asked walking over to the counter. She looked over and huffed.

"Thank god. I thought you were gone too." she sighed. I smiled and shook my head.

"What do ya need?" I asked. She walked over to the fridge and pulled out a tiny box.

"I need one more of these. It's manicotti cheese. Think you can run down the street and get me another box?" she asked sweetly. I grabbed the cheese and looked at it.

"Yeah. The one on the corner of 5th and Jefferson, right?" I asked. She nodded and went back tot he oven when it beeped. I was slowly getting to know my way around the city.

"Yes, that's the one. And pick up a thing of mushrooms too." she told me. I grabbed my purse and started to walk out. "Oh get a twenty out my purse." I stopped and turned back around. I grabbed her wallet and pulled out the bill.

"Okay. I'll be back later." I called and walked out the door. I made my way down the hot Detroit streets. I didn't see how people down south dealt with all this heat. I mean it was scorching up here so it must be unbearable down there. Luckily, Evelyn had taken me shopping for some new summer clothes. They actually had a few nice stores in the good part of Detroit. Today I was wearing a pair of tan shorts with a white tank top that had a US Marine's logo on it. I got it for Angel and his soon to be departure from the US.

"Hey!" someone yelled behind me. I kept walking thinking they were talking to someone else. Excuse me!" they yelled again. I turned to see a girl running after me.

"Can I help you?" I asked. She came to a stop in front of me and smiled.

"No. But I can help you." she breathed. She reached in her pocket and pulled out a twenty. I felt in my pockets and got nothing.

"Oh my god. Thank you!" I thanked her and took the bill from her. She smiled and brushed her hair back.

"I saw you drop it. You seemed to be in your own little world there." she said. I nodded.

"When I think, I think deep." I laughed. She smiled and stuck her hand out.

"I'm Paisley." she greeted. I grabbed her hand and shook it.

"I'm Emilie. You live around here?" I asked. She nodded and pointed down the street I came from.

"I live off of Newberry." she told me.

"Oh I live on Massey." I smiled. "I'm going to the store, you wanna come?" I offered. She nodded and we started walking.

"My brother is in a band with a guy that lives on Massey." she laughed.

"Yeah. I just moved here a couple months ago. I'm staying with a family friend and her boys." I said as we walked. She looked over at me and smiled.

"You live with the Mercer's don't you?" she asked. I looked at her confused and nodded.

"Yeah. How did you know?" I asked. She smiled again.

"My brother is in Jack's band. He talks about you all the time." she informed me. I blushed a little and looked at her.

"Really?" I asked.

"My god, yes. He's non stop about you. I guess it's you I should thank for making him leave Lydia." she laughed. I laughed with her and nodded.

"I didn't do it on purpose but yeah." I said. We walked into the store and walked to the cooled section. "I need manicotti cheese and mushrooms." I said out loud.

"The cheese is over there. I'll get the mushrooms for you." she said and walked off.

_'So he does think about you.'_ a voice popped in my head.

_'So it doesn't mean he likes her.'_ another voice chimed in.

_'But isn't it obvious. He so likes you.'_ the first said.

_'So what if he does? He's too old for her.'_ the second reminded us.

_'She'll be legal soon. Then she will be free to jump his bones.'_ the first laughed.

"I will not jump his bones." I said out loud. I heard laughing and turned to see Paisley smiling.

"Who's bones are you not jumping?" she asked amused. "No better yet, who were you talking to?"

"You'd call me looney if I told you." I smiled. She shook her head and we walked to the check-out.

"So have you heard Jack's band play yet?" she asked as we walked out. I thought for a moment and frowned.

"No, I haven't." I told her.

"Well, if you want we can drop this off at your place and we can go check them out at practice?" she offered. I bit my lip.

"Well, maybe he doesn't want me to see them play? I've heard him play alone but I wonder why he hasn't asked before." I wondered.

"James has been gone for a few weeks. So they had a short hiatus. I'm sure he won't mind." she smiled. I sighed and let a grin form on my face. "You know you want too." she pressed.

"Alright, but let's drop this off." I told her. She smiled and we made our way to my house.

"Evelyn?"I called as I opened the door.

"Kitchen." she called back. I walked with Paisley into the kitchen and set the bags on the counter. She turned around and went to turn back but she saw my new friend.

"Well, hello. It's nice to see a new face." she greeted. Paisley stepped forward and stuck out her hand.

"I'm Paisley, Mrs. Mercer." she introduced. Evelyn wiped her hands off and shook her hand.

"Please, call me Evelyn. It's nice to meet you." she smiled and looked over at me.

"I dropped my money and she gave it back. Her brother is in Jack's band." I told her. Evelyn lit up and looked back at Paisley.

"Ahh you must be Troy's little sister." she said.

"Yes, unfortunately." Paisley laughed. I stepped up and smiled.

"She was wanting to take me to see them practice. Is that okay?" I asked. She smiled and patted my cheek.

"Of course. Jack will be there and his band mates are nice guys. Just be careful and don't be late." she told me. I smiled and walked to the front door.

"So where do they practice at?" I asked as we walked down my street.

"A little in town so we're taking the bus." she told me. We stopped at the bus stop and waited for a few minutes. I had never taken a bus before but it wasn't that bad. There were a few freaky people sitting in the very back but they stayed to themselves.

"So are you seeing anyone?" Paisley asked.

"No. Haven't had the time to meet anyone since I've been here." I told her.

"Jack said you were from Massachusetts, right?" she asked. I nodded and looked out the window.

"I lived in Salem, them Cambridge and in Boston for a little while." I said.

"Do you like Detroit so far?" she asked. I looked at her and smiled.

"Yeah. It seems pretty nice. Everyone talks about all the crime but it's been good to me so far." I laughed. We were on the bus for a bout 10 minutes until Paisley pulled the string to get off. We stepped off and walked a few blocks until she stopped at a big brick building.

"This is it. Jack moved them here after the Lydia incident." she laughed. I smiled and followed her in. "They have the last room at the end of the hallway." she told me.

We walked down and I heard the faint sound of his guitar. I smiled as we got closer. Paisley looked back at me and slowly pushed the door open. We snuck in and leaned against the wall as they played. I watched Jack as he strummed his guitar and sang into the microphone. He was in his own little world. None of them had noticed that we were there. I could already tell who was Paisley's brother. They had that same bright blonde hair and eyes. The drummer had dark hair and eyes. They were good. Paisley's brother, the bassist, sang back up to Jack. But Jack was so much better. His usual deep and raspy voice has turned into a silky one. It was better than the little song he sang to me that one night.

The sudden stop of the music snapped me from my thoughts. I looked up and saw Jack ginning at me. I wasn't sure when it popped up or how long it was there, but I found myself smiling back.

* * *

We were about to end the song when I saw someone out the corner of my eye. I looked over to the door and saw Emilie and Paisley standing there. She caught my stare and smiled. It was contagious.

"Hey." I greeted and set my guitar down. She pushed herself off the wall and walked over.

"Hey. You guys sounded good." she told me. I smiled and looked back at the guys who were grinning like crazy.

"Guys this is Emilie. Em, this is Troy and James. I see you've already met Troy's sister Paisley." I said. She smiled and the guys and nodded.

"We ran into each other on my way to the store. It came out that we had a connection through the band and we asked if I wanted to see you practice." she told me.

"Being that she's never seen you guys play." Paisley piped up. I glared at her and looked back at Emilie.

"So we sounded good?" I asked. She smiled and looked up at me.

"Yes. You sounded amazing." she laughed.

"See? We are amazing. I like this chick." Troy said wrapping an arm around her. I gave him a glare that only he would understand. He grinned and dropped his limb. James laughed in the background and walked up.

"Well, it is very nice to finally meet the girl that has Jack jabbering about." he told her. She raised her brow and smiled at me.

"Well, it's nice to meet the band that he never talks about." she laughed.

"So I hate to do this but we gotta get going. Troy here still lives at home and we have dinner." Paisley said walking up behind Emilie.

"Well, it was nice to meet you." Emilie smiled and hugged her.

"Same here. Call me and we'll hang out." Paisley said as she and Troy walked out. James patted my shoulder and stood next to me.

"Jack, I'll see you tomorrow. Emilie, hopefully I'll see you more so Jack will shut up." he laughed. I rolled my eyes.

"I don't talk about her that much." I sighed. James laughed and walked away.

"Yes, you do!" he yelled. I shook my head and turned around to Emilie. She had a knowing grin of her face and had the slightest blush. This made those freaking voices come back.

'_She likes it.'_ the first one said.

_'Would you shut up!'_ the civilized one said.

_'She knows you were talking about her and she likes it. She's praying for you the make the next move. Look at her! She wants it.'_ the first yelled. I shook both from my head and sat on the amp.

"So you like Paisley?" I asked. She smiled and sat in a chair across from me.

"She's nice. It's kinda funny that we met like that and we already knew the same people." she smiled. She looked over at the recoding equipment and back at me. "Do you guys ever play shows?" she asked.

"Yeah. We haven't lately but now that we're back we will." I told her. She nodded and smiled at me.

"I'd like to see you play." she said. I grinned and looked away.

"You will." I promised. "Can you sing?" I asked. She looked away and I sighed. "You said you'd tell me later. Talk to me." I asked softly.

"I loved to sing and dance when I was little. Charlotte would always enroll me in plays and classes. The night they died me and Richie had a play. It was 'Hey Diddle, Diddle.' I had my big solo part where I sang the poem. When the time came, I stepped into the spotlight. I looked for my parents but I didn't see them." she stopped to wiped tears off her face. " I saw the police walking down the aisle and talking to my teacher. She grabbed me off stage and ended the play. I haven't sang or danced since." she cried. I grabbed her hands and pulled her over to me. I pulled her into my lap and held her to my chest.

"I'm sorry, Em." I whispered. She pulled back after a few minutes. I held her on my lap as she looked at me. I let my eyes roam her face. From her bright blue eyes, to her tiny nose, down to her full pink lips. I let them fall on her lips and then slowly looked up at her.

"Jack..." she whispered. I leaned in and pulled her to me. Our lips barely touched when the door burst open. She jumped off and took a few steps back as we looked to the door. I sighed when I saw the old janitor. He hadn't even seen us. He was busy mopping the floor with his headphones on.

"Harold!" I yelled. His head popped up and smiled.

"Sorry, Jack. I'll come back later." he said and walked out. I rubbed my face and looked over at Emilie.

"Sorry. He's old. He tries to start cleaning early. Management hates it." I laughed lightly. She nodded and smiled.

"We should probably get back. Evelyn was cooking when I left." she said softly. I nodded and stood up. She started to walk away when I grabbed her arm.

"Em, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that." I mumbled. She put a hand on my chest and smiled up at me.

"It's ok, Jack." she whispered. I nodded and followed her out.

"What was Ma cooking?" I asked as we sat on the bus.

"I think some kinda of cheese pasta. I'm not too sure." she told me. I nodded and looked out the window.

I could not believe I had tired to kiss her. Well, kinda did kiss her. After all the crap I gave to James and Troy I go and do this. But she said it was ok. What did that mean? Did she not mind that I tried? Or did she forgive me? I hate women. I'm pretty sure that hate us but damn. Why did everything have to be so confusing? We rode the rest of the way home in silence. It wasn't a uncomfortable silence but a silence because there was nothing to say. We got home and Ma had cooked a cheese chicken pasta. Emilie adored it.

About ten that night I decided to go lay down. It wasn't long before I fell asleep but I was awoken by a soft knock on my door. I sat up and looked at my door. I saw it open slightly and saw Emilie standing there in her night dress. I shivered and forced my eyes not to move down past her face.

"Jack." she whispered.

"What's wrong, Em?" I asked sleepily. She shut the door and walked over to my bed.

"I can't sleep." she whispered. I moved over closer to the wall and patted the empty side of the bed. She laid down and faced me. "I saw it." she whispered.

"Saw what?" I asked.

"The night my parents died. I saw on stage and the lights were shining. I just froze. I knew something had happened." she cried. I pulled her to my bare chest and kissed her head.

"It's okay. You're fine now." I whispered.

She sighed and relaxed after a few minutes. I looked down and saw her eyes closed. I closed my eyes and moved on my back. I froze when she shifted but she only moved closer to me. I smirked and watched her lay her head on my chest and sigh again. I kissed her head and kept on arm around her. I'm not sure where my self-control came from but it was on overdrive that night. Any other time a girl was on my bed I would have tried anything even if it got me slapped. But not tonight. I respected her and I knew better. She was still underage and she still had too many demons. Maybe one day...


	5. Jack's Past

Yesterday was possibly the best and worst day ever. I had gotten to see Jack play but it brought back some bad memories. Then there was, the kiss. I wasn't to sure what category that fell under. Maybe that was the thing that made it all that odd. He had kissed me., well tried. If Harold hadn't come in it would have been a kiss. I wasn't complaining, or was I? I wasn't sure but last night was rough. It was hard for me to fall asleep and when I did I just woke back up. I barely remember anything that did happen. But today I was feeling better. I had slept the rest of the night. Now I just needed to get my ass out of bed.

I stretched my arms over my head and rolled over to my other side. I let out a squeal when I turned to face Jack.

"I didn't think I was that scary in the morning." he laughed. I sighed and held my hand to my chest.

"I'm sorry. You scared me." I told him. I thought for a moment and looked at him. "Why am I in your bed?" I asked. He grinned and leaned back on his headboard.

"You don't remember?" he asked casually. I felt my heart beat faster and looked around. I was in his room and I felt my clothes on, so hopefully nothing happened. Well, I wouldn't complain if they did. Well, I didn't remember…Oh I need to hush.

"Remember what?" I asked hesitantly. He smiled again and lit a cigarette.

"You came in here last night and said you couldn't sleep. Nothing happened, I promise." he told me inhaling the smoke. I nodded and looked around.

"We fit on this bed comfortably?" I asked noticing how tiny his bed was.

"Actually you slept on me. But I'm not complaining." he winked. I smirked and moved one leg over his body so I was straddling him. He smirked and moved his cigarette.

"I bet." I smiled and finished crawling over him to leave.

"That's not fair, Em." he called out to me. I shut his door and walked out. I laughed to myself and looked right into the face of Bobby. My smiled faded and I swear I saw smoke flowing out his ears.

"What the FUCK?!" he yelled and kicked Jack's door open. I tried to grab his arm and he shrugged me off. "What the hell Jack?! She's 17! You know better. Ma told you to stay away from her!" he bellowed picking Jack up by his throat.

"BOBBY!!" I screamed and hit his back. He pushed me back and I fell on my butt.

"What the hell? Bobby, nothing happened!" Jack screamed. I saw Bobby tighten his grip and I scrambled up and ran into the hall. I banged on Angel's door and he opened it.

"He's gonna kill him!" I yelled. He ran past me into Jack's room and pulled Bobby off Jack. I ran over to Jack on the floor and held him.

"You jackass!" I screamed at Bobby. He glared at me and then Jack.

"He took advantage of you!" he yelled. I stood up and walked over to him. I stared at him for a moment and watched as his face turned into shock when my palm came across his cheek.

"If that's how you see me, then fuck you, Bobby Mercer. And if you think that of Jack, go to hell. I couldn't sleep last night. I kept dreaming of the night my parents died." I jabbed him in the chest with my finger. "I kept seeing the police officers walking down to my teacher. Every time I closed my eyes I saw that night. I needed someone to help me. I came to Jack and he held me while I cried. Nothing like that happened!" I screamed in his face. He swallowed hard and looked away. I felt the tears fall from my eyes and down my cheeks as I glared at him.

"I'm sorry." he whispered. He pulled out of Angel's grasp and looked at me one last time before leaving. Angel wrapped an arm around me and looked down.

"I'm gonna talk to him. Just calm down. I'll get Ma to make you breakfast." he said and walked out. I let out a sob as Jack turned me to face him.

"Calm down." he whispered. I shook my head and looked at him.

"No. He practically called me a slut and accused you of taking advantage of me, Jack!" I yelled. He pulled me back to him and held me tight.

"Calm down, Emilie." he told me firmly. "He was looking out for you." he told me. I sighed and pulled away from him.

"Why? Does he seriously not trust me with you? Why did Evelyn tell you to stay away?" I asked him. He looked away and sighed. "Tell me, Jack." I told him. He sat down and leaned his elbows on his knees.

"If you think Lydia was bad, you don't wanna ask about the others." he said softly. I sat next to him.

"Talk to me." I whispered. He looked over and shook his head.

"You wouldn't look at me the same." he said. I put my finger under his chin and made him look at me.

"Tell me." I ordered again.

"I haven't had the best past." he started. "I got into a bad scene a while ago. Evelyn had a hard time keeping up with me and it got me into some trouble." he told me. I nodded and kept my gaze on him.

"Are you gonna keep being vague or will you tell me the whole truth?" I asked. He looked over at me and smirked.

"Pushy much?" he smiled. I smiled back and nodded.

"Very. Now I spilled my secrets to you. Spill yours to me. You'll still be Jack to me." I told him.

"I started hanging out with these guys in about 10th grade. I was 16, I just got a car. I thought I was the hot shit. And I was for a while. My Mercer last name said it all." he started. "I started doing not so big drugs and after a while it got to bigger drugs." he told me.

"Like really bad ones?" I asked. He sighed and pulled up his sleeves to show my the old needle marks. I held back tears and rubbed his arm. "I'm sorry." I whispered. He pulled them back down and continued.

"I started to skip school and pull away from Evelyn and my brothers. I uh, I started with girls not too long after I turned 17. I went to parties and hooked up with a few and then met some more." he confessed. "I was really messed up one night and a friend of mine handed me a bottle of pills. He said it would make it easier to get the newbie girls, as he called them."

"The virgins?" I asked. He nodded and took a deep breath.

"I started using it and…" he trailed off.

"You drugged them and slept with them?" I clarified. He stood up and walked away.

"Yes. A party got caught one night after I was 18 and I got busted with the pills and an underage girl. She was 17 so I didn't get in much trouble. But I did get a month in juvy and 2 years probation. I got off a year ago." he told me. I nodded and let his words settle. "I'm not that guy anymore, Em." he said walking back over to me.

"I know." I whispered.

"I knew you'd take it this way." he said walking back over to the other side of the room. I stood up and walked over to him.

"Jack, do you do drugs?" I asked.

"No. I smoke and that's it." he told me.

"Do you do any of the thing you use to?" I asked again. He turned to me and shook his head.

"No, none of it. I got better. I wouldn't dare touch that shit again." he said softly. I smiled and grabbed his face.

"Ok then. I have nothing to worry about. Everyone has a past, Jack. Some are better or worse than others. I'm not going to judge you because of your past." I promised him. He nodded and sighed.

"But do you see why Bobby flipped?" he asked. I sighed and nodded.

"Yeah. I guess I should apologize to him." I said. He smiled and nodded.

"Maybe just a little." he said. I nodded and pulled him in for a hug.

"Thank you for telling me." I told him as I pulled away.

"Thank you for not judging me." he said as I walked out. I closed his door and walked downstairs. I saw Angel in the kitchen with Evelyn.

"Where's Bobby?" I asked at the doorway. They looked up and pointed outside. I nodded and walked to the front door. I opened it and saw Bobby sitting on the front porch. He looked up and sighed.

"Come to yell at me more?" he asked. I shook my head and sat next to him.

"No. I came to apologize." I told him. He looked at me and shook his head.

"No. You shouldn't have to. I know Jack's not like that and you aren't that kinda girl." he said putting his cigarette out.

"Jack told me about his past. The girls and the drugs." I told him. He looked shocked for a minute.

"I'm surprised he told you." he said.

"Well, he did. And I'm sorry for going off on you like that. I know now you were worried about me." I told him. He nodded and stood up.

"I'm sorry for jumping too quick. I should have listened first. Maybe I should talk to Jack too." he told me. I nodded and followed him inside.

"Yeah, that might be nice. I think you might have left bruises." I told him. He sighed and walked upstairs. I walked back into the kitchen and sat down at the table.

"So is everything okay?" Evelyn asked setting a plate in front of me. I sighed and looked at it.

"I'm sorry, I can't eat. I've lost my appetite." I told her meekly. She nodded and moved it over to Angel who happily took it. She sat next to me and smiled.

"Did you and Jack talk?" she asked. I nodded and played with my nails.

"Yeah. He told me his past with a few things that are not too nice." I told her. She understood and patted my hand.

"He's changed since then. He's a good boy." she told me. I smiled a little and looked at her.

"I know." I assured her. "It's just hard to picture him like that." I explained.

"I know. I didn't believe it even when he started to get skinny. But he was my baby." she told me. I sighed and looked over at Angel.

"When do you leave?" I asked. He swallowed the food in his mouth after a glare from Evelyn.

"I think three days after your birthday." he told me. I nodded and he grinned. "You gonna miss me?" he asked.

"Of course. You're me savior!" I exclaimed sitting on his lap. "At least you'll be here for my party." I told him. He nodded and finished eating around me.

"I wouldn't miss it. You having a party?" he asked. I shook my head and wrinkled my nose.

"No, I'll be fine without one." I told him. I heard Evelyn gasp and I looked over at her.

"You most definitely have a party. You're 18, we can't let that slide." she told me. I rolled my eyes and looked down at Angel.

"She do this to you?" I asked him.

"Oh yeah. If we dealt with it, so will you." he smiled.

I sighed and got off his lap. I walked out the kitchen and walked up to my room. I laid down on the bed and closed my eyes. I really didn't see Jack as that type of guy. He did drugs, bad drugs. He drugged girls to sleep with them. This was horrible but I still saw him the way he was. I know it surprised him, hell it surprised me. I wasn't some feminist bitch but I didn't like how some men treated women. It horrified me at the things I heard on t.v. and in the papers. Jack was one of those guys, granted not the worst but he was. I knew he wasn't like that anymore. I could see it in his eyes when he talked about it. He knew he made a mistake and it hurt him. Everyone makes mistakes but it takes a real man to own up to them. Jack did and he even served out his time without complaining. I'm still not sure why I didn't see him differently but I wasn't going to let it bother me. Jack was Jack. He was the one that held me through all the dark nights and the one that held me while I cried. He was different now and I was the one to vouch for him.

* * *

I had spilled my deepest secret to her. I used to drug and sleep with girls. I shot up and sniffed a bunch of stuff I shouldn't have. I had done a lot of things I'm not proud of but I don't do them anymore. I can say that and it be the honest to God truth. I changed after my short juvy stint and after my probation. I was a good boy while I was on. I stayed in my limits, I didn't even drink. I went to every meeting with my officer and told him everything that I had done. I made sure he knew that I had changed. At first he would be a bitch to me, I didn't blame him. I wanted to kick myself for the things I had done. But after a while of getting to know me he stopped looking at me like a criminal. Yes, I had made a bad choice but I owned it and I didn't complain. It wasn't that I wanted to play nice to get off easier. I wasn't giving them a hard time because I deserved what they threw at me. I deserved that and much more.

"Jack." Angel called from my door. I looked up and saw him holding the phone. I grabbed it and sat back down.

"Hello?" I answered.

"Jack, man it's Troy." Troy said through the line.

"Yeah, what's up?" I asked. I heard a few sounds in the background.

"Listen, dude we're having a get together at the lake. How about you and Emilie come out here and hang with us?" he laughed. I sighed and looked at Emilie's door through my cracked one.

"I dunno about bringing her out there." I told him.

"Paisley's here. They can hang out if they get tired of us." he told me. "Come on, get you and her out the house." he pleaded.

"Let me go ask her. Hold on." I told him. I laid the phone down and walked over to Emilie's room. I knocked and waited for her to answer. I smiled when she swung the door open.

"Hey!" she chirped. I leaned on the frame and looked her up and down. She was still in her pajama's.

"How about you get dressed and grab a bathing suit." I told her. She looked at me confused and crossed her arms.

"Why?" she asked. I laughed and scratched my head.

"Umm why else do you need a bathing suit?" I asked seriously. She rolled her eyes and smiled.

"Well, you can wash the car, go tanning, go swimming or just wear it to make the guys drool." she counted off on her fingers. I smacked her hand away.

"Well, we're going swimming. Troy wants us to come out to the lake and hang out for the afternoon. And yes, Paisley will be there." I told her. She bit her lip and looked away thinking. I laughed when she tapped her lip and scrunched up her face.

"Well, I dunno. I think you'd be quite mean in the water." she said sweetly. I faked hurt and placed my hand over my heart.

"Oww that hurt! I would never be mean." I laughed. She playfully glared at me then smiled.

"Yeah, let me get dressed and we'll go." she said. I nodded and walked back to my room. I picked up the phone and talked to Troy.

"Yeah, we're getting ready now." I told him. I heard him yell and I laughed.

"Kick ass! We'll see you there Jackie boy." he said. We hung up and I walked over to my dresser to get my swimming trunks. I changed into them and slipped a black shirt on. I walked out as Emilie was walking out. I looked at her and smirked. She had on a pair of pale pink shorts with the strings of her bikini bottom hanging over the top and a white tank top over her bikini top. I couldn't tell what her bikini looked like but I knew it was a shade of red or pink.

"Stop staring." she grinned and walked to the hall closet to grab two towels.

"I can't help it. Now if anyone else stares…" I trailed off laughing.

"You gonna go all Mercer on them?" she laughed. I nodded and wrapped an arm around her.

"Hell yeah. Teach them a lesson." I declared.

"About what? Not to look a pretty girl?" she laughed again.

"Exactly. Especially one on my arm." I said proudly. She hugged me and kissed my side.

"You're nice, ya big meanie." she smiled. We walked downstairs and I looked in the living room.

"We're going out. Be back later." I yelled to anyone close by. Ma poked her head out and looked at us.

"Where?" she asked.

"Lake with a few friends. I'm taking the car." I told her and grabbed the keys. She smiled and turned away.

We walked out to the car and made our way to the lake. We talked a little on the way but mostly we sang along with the radio. Well, it was more like yelling or belting but we had fun none the less. It was cute to see her yelling out the words to the Clash with a smile on her face. I couldn't believe she knew half the songs I put on but she kept up with me.

"So this is it?" she asked when we stepped out the car. I grabbed out towels and nodded.

"Yep. This is it. We come here all the time." I told her. I looked around and pointed out a few people.

"You know most of the people here. That red headed guy is Mark, he's an ass. So stay away from him. He likes James's cousin or something. She nodded and looked like she was about to say something when someone yelled for her.

"Emilie!" Paisley yelled from the middle of the lake. "Hurry, the water is great."

"Well, you better hurry." I laughed. She grabbed her towel from me and took off for the lake. I watched her shimmy off her short and strip her top off. She had on a pink and white stripped bikini. It didn't cover much but hey, that's how I like it. Oh I better stop there.

"Jack, Jack, Jack. Quit staring. Your Mama taught you better than that." Troy teased as I walked up to them.

"Shut up. So what's the occasion?" I asked sitting down. James handed me my guitar and smiled.

"Just a little jam session." he told me. I nodded and fiddled with my strings. We played a few songs and chatted about the upcoming weeks.

"So I talked to Jamie and he said whenever we wanted to play, just call." Troy said sipping his beer. Jamie owned this kick ass night club in Detroit. He let all kinds of bands play there. A few even got record deals.

"Well, we need to write a list of songs and get ready." I told them. They nodded and we started to play another song. I was half way through when I felt water falling over me. It wasn't a lot but it was enough. I heard her laughing and looked up at Emilie wringing her hair out over my head.

"Hey, Jackie." she greeted. I bit my lip and slowly stood up. I expected her to move away but she just smiled.

'_I told you._' the menacing voice sang in my head. I waited for the other but it never came. '_See even the other one agrees. She wants you.'_ it sang again.

"What are you gonna do?" she smiled. I smirked and grabbed her waist. She put her hands on my chest and smiled up at me.

"I'm gonna make you pay." I told her. I picked her up and threw her over my shoulder. She playfully hit my back and screamed. I heard Troy and James yelling at me.

"Get her, Jackie!!" they yelled. I ran over to the rock on the side of the lake and stood at the top.

"Don't you dare throw me, Jack." she laughed. I let her lid off my shoulder but stopped her when she was at my waist. She wrapped her legs around me and smiled.

"Why not?" I asked taking another step towards the edge.

"'Cause I'll be mad." she said looking over the edge.

"What if I go with you?" I asked. She thought for a minute and shook her head.

"Nope." she said sweetly.

"Well, I wanna throw you over. What can I do to let you let me throw you over?" I asked. She looked at me for a second and smiled.

"Kiss me." she said softly. I smirked and pulled her down to my face. I could still taste the fresh lake water in her lips as I kissed her. She ran her hands up my neck and kissed me back She pulled back and jerked us back. I tried to balance myself but we fell over the edge. I came up and heard everyone cheering. I felt someone jump on my back and felt lips on my ears.

"That was fun." Emilie whispered. I laughed and pulled her off my back. I made her face me and stared at her.

"Why'd you do that?" I asked. She smiled softly and looked away.

"I wanted to." she said softly.

"Emilie, trust me when I say this, it's not that I didn't want to, hell I didn't want to stop but-" I stared but she cut me off with another kiss. I pulled her to my chest and kissed her back. I was about to slip my tongue in when I pulled back.

"But I'm too young." she finished for me softly. I nodded sadly. She bit her lips and pulled away from me.

"Em, come here." I pleaded as she swam away. I sighed and swam to shore. I grabbed my towel and looked at Emilie. She wrapped her towel around herself and looked at me.

"I'm ready to go." she said. I nodded and looked at the group of people behind me.

"Well, I'll se you guys later." I said and walked after Emilie.

We drove home in silence and made sure we didn't look or touch one another. We got home and she went straight to her room. I sighed and walked into the living room. Bobby looked up and gave me a weird look.

"What's wrong with Em?" he asked. I laughed and sat down.

"I'm not sure if I wanna tell you. You would either hit me or not believe me." I told him.

"What happened Jack?" he asked firmly.

"She kissed me. Twice." I told him bluntly. He looked at me and bit his cheek.

"She kissed you?" he asked.

"Well, she asked me to kiss her. So I kissed her and she kissed back. Then I went to tell her that she was too young and she kissed me." I told him.

"And you kissed her back?" he asked again.

"Uh yeah. Why wouldn't I?" I asked confused.

"Well, one she's too young." he told me. I sighed and threw my head back.

"As if this is not new to you, I like her. And I know she's too young but she kissed me." I defended.

"But she's too young." he said again.

"She'll be 18 in like three weeks!" I yelled standing up. He nodded his head and sipped his beer.

"Yes and in three weeks, you can kiss her." he said casually. I rubbed my head and walked away. I walked upstairs and stopped at her door. I heard a faint whimpering and knocked.

"Em? You okay?" I asked. I heard something fall on the floor and opened her door. I looked in and saw Emilie sitting on the floor shaking.

"Jack." she muttered. I walked over to her and picked her up.

"Em, what's wrong?" I asked. She shook her head and I set her on the bed. "Bobby!" I yelled. I heard footsteps and Bobby appeared in no time. He saw her and glared at me.

"Jack!" he seethed.

"I don't know what happened. She was fine when we left." I told him. He felt he head and pulse.

"She's drugged Jack." he whispered. I stood up straight and thought for a minute.

"Mark." I growled. I went to walk away when Emilie grabbed my arm.

"Stay." she whispered. I looked over at Bobby and he nodded.

"Honey, what did you drink?" Bobby asked. Sh swallowed and looked at me.

"That red headed guy gave me a bottle of water." she told us shakily. I nodded and Bobby stood up.

"No, Bobby. Let me take care of this." I pleaded.

"She needs you." he reminded me. I grabbed my phone and dialed Troy's number.

"Then let me get James and Troy." I told him. He nodded and sat next to Emilie. I talked to Troy and told him what happened. He said James was there with him and they knew where Mark was.

"They getting it done?" Bobby asked. I nodded and kneeled in front of Emilie.

"I didn't even notice anything different." I whispered. Bobby laid a hand on my shoulder and sighed.

"It's okay. She just needs to rest and it'll wear off. You didn't let her leave your sight did you?" he asked wondering if Mark had gotten to her.

"No. Not once." I told him. Ya know I've never seen what it does to them." I said wiping a strand of hair off her face.

"What drugged?" Bobby asked. I nodded.

"I was fucked up to so I never saw how it affected them." I sighed. He nodded and looked at the door.

"Well, you stay with her. I'm going to talk to Ma and Angel." he said walking away.

"I don't want you guys to think I had anything to do with this." I said quickly.

"We know, Jack. We know." he told me. I sat back down next to Emilie and rubbed her back.

"Ya know, I don't regret kissing you." she smiled softly. I laughed and laid back next to her.

"At least now I know what possessed you to do it in the first place." I smiled.

"You didn't think I would do it sober?" she asked.

"I don't know. Would you?" I asked. She smiled again and nodded.

"In a heartbeat. But only after I'm 18, ya know." she laughed. I kissed her head and nodded.

"I'm so sorry this happened." I whispered. She patted my chest and looked up at me.

"It's not your fault." she whispered back. "What are James and Troy going to do?" she asked. I sighed and closed my eyes.

"Nothing you need to worry about." I told her. She nodded and laid back down.

I watched her fall asleep and mentally curse myself for letting her be there with Mark. I knew he still had a thing for drugs but I never though he'd do this. I let her get drugged on my watch. At least, Troy and James were taking care of it.


	6. Surprise!

_I added the pictures and a few banners for the cast! I also added new banners for a few of my other stories! Go check 'em out if you haven't seen them yet!!_

* * *

If wasn't against drugs before, I was now. I was in bed for two days crying and shivering in the heat. Jack and bobby said something about it being a bad dose of whatever it was Mark got me with. And speaking of Mark, I saw him last week. He still had a black eye and broken nose. Troy and James did one hell of a job on him. They came over and brought me flowers. Said I was like their little sister now. Jack and I had agreed to forget that kiss, well two kisses, ever happened. If it was to happen then it would be while both of us were sober. And if it was going to happen at least now it would legal. Today was my 18th birthday.

"Wake up!" I yelled jumping on Jack still asleep in his bed. He groaned and put his pillow over his head.

"Em, it's too early." he whined. I stood up and yanked his covers off. I dropped back down on his stomach and pulled his pillow off.

"It's noon!" I squealed. He covered his face and pouted.

"Just another hour, please." he begged. I frowned and figured he forgot.

"Jack, tell me you didn't forget." I pleaded. He removed his hands and looked up at me.

"Forget what?" he asked thoroughly confused. I felt tears fill my eyes and got off him and stalked out his room. I stomped downstairs and walked into the kitchen.

"Did anyone else forget?!" I yelled to the old woman and two men at the table. I was pissed. They looked up from their plates and stared at me. "I can't believe this!" I exclaimed and turned around. I walked smack into a bare chest and looked up at Jack. He was smirking at me.

"Move!" I yelled. His smirk grew as he looked down at me.

"You're so cute when you're mad." he laughed. I dropped my jaw and pinched his stomach. He yelped and rubbed the red spot.

"You're an ass!" I snapped and pushed past him. I was about to walk upstairs when Jack grabbed me and lead me into the living room with my eyes covered.

"Stop being a bitch." he told me and uncovered my eyes. I looked around the room and bit my lip. On the coffee table were brightly wrapped boxes. I tilted my head up and looked at Jack.

"Oh." I said blushing a little. He smiled and looked down at me.

"Oh." he mocked bobbing his head. He pushed me to the boxes and called everyone into the room. "Open and be nice." he teased. I smiled at everyone and grabbed the first box. I felt bad that I had yelled at them for forgetting when they hadn't. But they didn't let me apologize.

Evelyn made me three homemade photo albums. One was for my family, one was for my friends and one was for those pictures who want to get rid of but you don't wanna loose that time in life. The third was for those pictures. The faded memories as Evelyn had called it. Bobby had bought me a brand new pair of white ice skates.

"I don't skate." I told him after I opened them. He grinned and lit his cigarette.

"Oh you will." he promised.

Angel bought me a huge U.S. Marine's hoodie that looked like his. He said now I wouldn't have to steal his and I'd have a piece of him while he was gone. I knew there was a heart somewhere in that big ol' Marine. Jerry and Camille had put money on various gift cards so I could buy new clothes for the approaching winter.

"Paisley said she'd give you her present tonight." Jack told me. I nodded and looked at him.

"Did you really forget? Or are you not a present type of guy?" I asked noticing there was no gift from him. He smirked and shook his head.

"I got you something. You'll get it later." he promised. What is all this about tonight?

"What's going on tonight?" I asked. Everyone smiled and stood up. "Hey! Tell me!" I laughed as they all walked out. I looked at the only remaining person and smiled sweetly.

"What, Emilie?" Jack asked smirking. I walked over and sat on his lap.

"Jackie, what's going on tonight?" I asked sweetly. He shook his head and kissed my cheek.

"Nothing." he said casually. I glared at him and he smiled. Before I could say anything he picked me up and carried me upstairs.

"Hey! Jack, what are you doing?" I asked as he carried me into his room and threw me on the bed.

"I'm giving you half of your birthday present." he grinned. I winked and sat up on his bed. "Get your mind outta the gutter." He laughed.

"What is it?" I asked.

"Close your eyes." he told me. I smiled and closed my eyes. I felt the bed move behind me and then felt something cold around my neck. I smiled and felt the necklace that he had put on me. I felt his hands drop down the bare part of my back and shivered.

"Open." he whispered. I opened my eyes and walked over to the mirror. The tears fell instantly when I saw the silver charm on my neck. In cursive lettering was the word 'Diddle.'

"Jack." I whispered. He walked up behind me and smiled.

"I was at the local jewelers and a woman had gotten a personalized necklace with 'Home Sweet, Home' on it. I asked if he could do 'Diddle' and he said yeah." he told me. I smiled and stared at it. "Maybe that can take you one step further away from your fear of singing." he said softly.

"You're not asking me to sing Hey Diddle, Diddle are you?" I laughed between tears. He smirked and wrapped an arm around my waist.

"No but I don't want you to be scared anymore." he whispered in my ear. I turned to face him and smiled. Without hesitation I leaned up and kissed him. He tightened his grip on my waist and pulled me into him. A knock jolted us from the moment.

Jack?" Evelyn called through his door.

"You can come in Ma." he laughed. She opened the door and smiled.

"You gave it to her." she smiled. I bit my lip and nodded.

"Yeah, I love it." I said more to Jack than to her. He smiled and laid down on his bed.

"Well, breakfast is done if you two are hungry." she smiled and walked out. I stood there and looked around.

"You hungry?" Jack asked from the bed. I smiled and walked over to him.

"A little." I whispered standing next to his bed. He pulled my legs down onto the bed and laid me next to him.

"Happy birthday." he whispered in my ear. I smiled and kissed his lips softly.

"Thank you." I whispered back. I stood up and pulled him up with me. "Now, I'm hungry." I smiled.

I wasn't sure where we were going but Paisley made me dress up nicely. She laid out my favorite ripped blue jean skirt and a black and silver halter top. She let me borrow a pair of knee high black boots. They were all being secretive about tonight but they promised I would like it.

"Hurry!" Paisley yelled. I sighed and ran downstairs.

"Sorry. Are you sure I look okay?" I asked. She smiled and grabbed my hand.

"Yes. Now let's go." she urged. We walked our to her car and drove to some kind of club.

"Jack's here?" I asked looking at the busy club.

"Yes. You're 18, you're having fun." she laughed and drug me into the building. We walked in and it was packed. People were dancing and jumping around. It was crazy. I felt Paisley pull me to one corner and finally saw familiar faces.

"Birthday girl!" Troy yelled. I smiled and hugged him. James handed me some fruity looking drink. I looked at it and him.

"I made it and it's alcohol free, per Jack's orders." he smiled. I nodded and took a sip.

"Strawberry." I laughed.

"He said that's what you'd like." he told me. I looked around and stood on my toes.

"Where is he anyways?" I asked. They looked around and shrugged.

"Said he'd be back in a few." Troy said casually. I nodded and sipped my drink. A little while later Jack was still missing and Troy and James had disappeared too.

"Where is everyone?" I asked Paisley. She smiled and kept sipping her drink. "Pais, what's going on?" I asked again. I heard the music stop and she pointed on stage.

"Tonight is a very special night. The upcoming band has played here many times but have been on hiatus recently. But tonight they are back and are performing for us!" the man yelled on stage. "But tonight is also a very special person's birthday. Will Emilie Ravin stand up?" he asked. My jaw dropped and Pasiley jumped up and pulled me with her. "There she is! Everyone Emilie is 18 today!" he smiled. Everyone cheered and I glared at Paisley.

I wasn't sure what he said next because I was too busy staring at Jack when he walked on stage with his guitar. He smiled at me and grabbed the microphone.

"This is for Emilie. Happy birthday." he winked. I sat back down and listened as him, Troy and James started to play.

_Maybe it's intuition  
But some things you just don't question  
Like in your eyes  
I see my future in an instant  
and there it goes  
I think I've found my best friend  
I know that it might sound more than  
a little crazy but I believe_

I knew I loved you before I met you  
I think I dreamed you into life  
I knew I loved you before I met you  
I have been waiting all my life

There's just no rhyme or reason  
only this sense of completion  
and in your eyes  
I see the missing pieces  
I'm searching for  
I think I found my way homeI know that it might sound more than  
a little crazy but I believe

I knew I loved you before I met you  
I think I dreamed you into life  
I knew I loved you before I met you  
I have been waiting all my life

A thousand angels dance around you  
I am complete now that I found you

His words floated through my mind and I couldn't help but smile. His eyes were on me the whole time, only me. There were at least a hundred other girls screaming and staring at him but he was looking at me. He was singing to me. I felt Paisley pat my shoulder and smile.

"He'll be down soon." she whispered. I nodded and listened as they played another song. This one was upbeat and got me out my seat to dance with Paisley.

_Anytime I need to see your face  
I just close my eyes  
And I am taken to a place where  
Your crystal mind and  
Magenta feelings take up shelter  
In the base of my spine  
Sweet like a chic a cherry cola_

I don't need to try and explain  
I just hold on tight  
And if it happens again I might move  
So slightly  
To the arms and the lips and the face  
Of the human cannonball  
That I need to I want to

Come stand a little bit closer  
Breath in and get a bit higher  
You'll never know what hit you  
When I get to you

Ooh I want you  
I don't know if I need you  
But ooh I'd die to find out  
Ooh I want you  
I don't know if I need you  
But ooh I'd die to find out  
I'm the kind of person who endorses  
A deep commitment  
Getting comfy getting perfect  
Is what I live for  
But a look then a smell of perfume  
Its like I'm down on the floor  
And I don't know what I'm in for

_Ooh I want you  
I don't know if I need you  
But ooh I'd die to find out  
Ooh I want you  
I don't know if I need you  
But ooh I'd die to find out_

Conversation has a time and place  
In the interaction of a lover and  
A mate  
But the time of talking  
Using symbols using words  
Can be likened to a deep sea diver  
Who is swimming with a raincoat

Come stand a little bit closer  
Breathe in and get a bit higher  
You'll never know what hit you  
When I get to you

Everyone cheered and clapped as they jumped off stage. Jack made his way over and I jumped on him. I kissed his cheek and smiled at him.

"Thank you!" I whispered. He smiled and pulled me onto the dance floor. I laughed when Troy, James and Paisley joined us and started jumping around like mad men. We danced and sang at the top of our lungs all night. It was by far the best birthday.

We were laying on the roof late that night when I finally brought her up. I had tried to push her away for the majority of the day for one simple reason. If I thought about her, I'd cry. And I didn't want to cry. I knew she wouldn't want me to cry. I wanted her to have her own special time with me for when it was calm and I was ready to breakdown.

"I miss her." I whispered to Jack. He grabbed my hand and kissed it. "It's just not the same. I know it wouldn't be but it's so weird. Even now sometimes I wake up and think she's here." I told him tearing up.

"I know." he whispered back. I looked at the stars and teared up.

"The only dreams I remember are the ones of her and they are simple. Like me getting up to fix breakfast and her walking in and saying hello." I whispered.

"That's your way of keeping her alive." he told me. I nodded and looked over at him.

"You believe people can look down on you?" I asked. He looked over at me and sighed.

"I don't know." he said. I looked over at him and propped myself up on my elbow.

"What do you believe?" I asked. He looked back up at the stars and took a deep breath.

"I believe that whoever made this world has a reason for everything. They have a reason for brining people into the world and taking people from it. I believe they put us through tests in life to see how we manage. And I believe that one day we will see the ones we lost." he told me. I nodded and looked up at the sky again.

"Well, I think that is very wise. And I hope I'd get to see Abigail and my parents again." I said softly. He kissed my hand again and smiled. We stayed out there for a little longer and we finally went inside.

"We should get some sleep. Angel's leaving early tomorrow." Jack reminded me. I sighed and walked to his door.

"I'm gonna miss him." I said sadly. Jack nodded and smiled.

"He'll be back in no time." he promised. I smiled and walked over to my room. I laid in bed and smiled. Today had been the best day in almost forever. I had never felt so loved and cared for since Abigail. I looked over on my bedside dresser and grabbed the last picture I took of her.

"Thank you for taking care of me." I whispered to her face. Even after her death she made sure I was taken care of. She made sure I was okay. I'd could never thank her enough. But she sure did love me enough.

"I don't wanna do this." I mumbled and drug my feet across the floor to my door. There was a constant knocking and they made me get outta bed to open it. I swung the door open and saw a mellow looking Angel. I opened the door further and let him come in. He sat on my bed and sighed.

"Is it okay to be nervous?" he asked rubbing his hands together. I sat next to him and laid my head on his shoulder. Angel was closet to me next to Jack. He had been there since my first morning and he still reminded me of that. He was my rock and I was his pillow.

"Of course. I'd be afraid if you were okay." I told him. He sighed and dropped his head.

"I'm proud and excited to be going over there to help my country, but I'm scared. I don't wanna die. I wanna live." he mumbled. I rubbed his back.

"That's the risk though. You're strong, I believe in all of you." I told him. He lifted his head up and smiled.

"Thanks, Diddle." he said softly. I smiled at my new found nickname. It amazed me how they could turn something that was a bad memory into something special. Even as tiny as a new nickname. I hugged his neck and he returned it. "Umm one more thing." he laughed a little. I looked at him and smiled.

"What?" I asked. He grabbed the hoodie he bought me and held it to his chest.

"You keep my jacket. I wanna take your's." he told me. I smiled and looked at the hoodie.

"It smells like a girl but okay." I laughed. He nodded and smiled sadly.

"It smells like you. That's why I want it. They said it's good to have something to remind you of home. More than just a picture." he said sadly. I bit my lip and held back my tears.

"I like that." I whispered. He kissed my head and left with my jacket. I stayed on my bed until Bobby came in.

"Hey Diddle. Time to go." he called. I looked up and wiped a tear away. He patted my back and sighed.

"It's okay. He'll be back in no time." he assured me. I laughed and remembered Jack telling me that last night.

"Jack said that to me last night." I smiled. He bit his lip and looked down at me.

"Yeah, he told me that this morning. But don't tell Angel." he whispered. I nodded knowing Bobby's emotional side was not to be spoke of. He loved his brothers but he wasn't going to get all 'girly' on them, as he called it.

The ride to the airport was quiet. Evelyn sat in the passenger seat stiffling her cries while Bobby drove slowly puffing on his cigarette. I sat in the back between a very melancholy Jack and a fidgety Angel. By the time we got there both had grabbed a hold of one of my hands. It was the moment we were dreading for months. Angel was finally leaving to go overseas. He'd be gone for a long and worrisome 18 months.

"You be safe and write me whenever you can." Evelyn cried hugging him. He buried his face in her shoulder and kissed her cheek when he pulled back.

"I'll see you when I get back, Ma." he promised. Something didn't feel right when he said that. Those simple promising words cut through me like a knife. I wasn't sure what it was but it wasn't good.

"Take care bro." Bobby said hugging him. "Show them how the Mercer's do business." Angel laughed and looked at Jack.

"Take care, Jackie Poo." he smiled widely. Jack laughed and hugged him. "Make sure you keep a close eye on Diddle for me." he winked. Jack smiled and pulled back as Angel walked over to me.

"Hey Diddle. You help my Ma keep there maniac's in line. They can be a handful." he smiled. I blinked back tears and hugged the tall handsome Marine. "Aww now don't cry on me now." he laughed. I smiled and wipe my eyes.

"Just don't give me a reason to cry. Come home, please." I begged him. "I don't wanna loose anybody else." I whispered. He kissed my forehead. He gave us one last gleaming smile and walked to his terminal. "Just come home soon." I whispered to myself.

Angel leaving was one of the big changes that life was bringing me. About two weeks after he left I got Camille to take me to the local community college. I filled out an application and got accepted. The money Abigail saved for this very reason came in handy. I started in early September and made my major early childhood development. I wanted to be a teacher. Jack started playing more gigs and the band was quiet the buzz around town. Everything was great.

"Jack!" I yelled as I walked into the house. Today had been horrible. My heel broke on my shoe, I had forgotten my midterm and I missed my last class by accident.

"He's out." Evelyn called to me. I set my books down on the counter and sighed. "Long day?" she smiled.

"Horrible. Everything that could go wrong, did go wrong." I told her. She smiled and handed me a letter.

"Angel sent you a letter." she smiled. I eagerly grabbed the letter and read it. "He says it's pretty calm where he is."

"That's good. More of a chance he'll be okay." I smiled. It wasn't a long letter but just one that said hello and I miss you. I folded it and put it in my notebook. "So where'd Jack go?" I asked.

"Troy called and asked him to go down to the practice hall." she informed me. I nodded and looked around. "You can help me cook?" she offered. I smiled and grabbed my books.

"I got work to do. Catch Jack when he gets home." I laughed. I walked into the hallway and the door burst open. Jack ran in and pushed me back into the kitchen with Evelyn. He was wearing a huge smile and looked like a kid in a candy store.

"I have the best news in the world!" he exclaimed

"Really, what's that?" I asked. He grabbed my arms and surprised me when he pulled me in for a hard kiss. He pulled back and looked between me and Evelyn.

"I'm moving to Los Angeles. We got a record deal!" he yelled. Evelyn gasped and I dropped my books. Moving? To LA? All the way across the country? That was the good news...? I knew it would happen. For once something is going right. I got into college. Angel is safe. Jack and I had slowly been progressing in out relationship and now I have to loose him. This is unbelievable. Not only does my life crash but damn it to add injury to insult, it's crashes then burns!

* * *

**_I Knew I Loved You & I Want You by Savage Garden_**


	7. Leaving

So I know this is early...lol. But some girls on the other site that I post this on were getting impatient _cough_ Lauren and Elle _cough _LOL...And I already have chapter 8 half way done so I guess it's okay. I also want to thank BrownEyedGirl75 and OfLoveAndLust for rveiwing like you do! Thank you so very much! I'm so happy you like it!

_

* * *

I will remember you  
Will you remember me?  
Don't let your life pass you by  
Weep not for the memories_

I stared at him and tried to catch my breath. I let out a breath of relief when Evelyn spoke first.

"Oh Jackie. That's great. But when do you leave?" she asked hugging the now aspiring rock star. He was so happy but I couldn't find it in my body to feel the same.

"A month. We have time to save up and find an apartment for when we get there." he told her happily. They hugged again and then he looked at me. I tried to smile but I couldn't even force one to appear.

"Emilie, you okay?" he asked. I looked at him and felt my eyes fill to the rim with tears. His smile faded as he scanned my face. "Em, what's wrong?" he whispered.

I shook my head and took off for the stairs. I closed my door and fell onto my bed. I knew he was behind me and it wasn't a surprise when I heard my door creak open. I heard it shut but kept my face turned away. I knew it was being selfish but damn it, this was too much.

_Remember the good times that we had?  
I let them slip away from us when things got bad  
How clearly I first saw you smilin' in the sun  
Wanna feel your warmth upon me, I wanna be the one  
_

"Diddle." he whispered sitting on my bed. He went to touch my arm but I sat up before he could.

"What?" I asked a little to harshly. I watched as all the joy he had vanished. Now all I saw was hurt. Did I really do that?

"I'm sorry." I whispered trying to steady my voice. He shook his head and moved a little closer.

"Don't be. I know it's sudden." he told me softly. He went to touch me again but I moved away. "Em, please."

"No. You're leaving. Maybe we should gradually go our separate ways so when you leave it won't hurt as much." I told him swallowing my tears. Now I know I was being selfish.

"That's not the way to do it, Emilie." he frowned. I shook my head and agreed.

"Maybe not but it's a whole lot easier." I pressed. He stood up and walked to stand in front of me.

_I will remember you  
Will you remember me?  
Don't let your life pass you byWeep not for the memories_

"No, it won't. We need to do the complete opposite. We need to spend as much time together as possible." he told me. I shook my head once again and moved away from him. I turned back to him on the other side of the room.

"Why so I can feel worse when you do leave? Get me even more used to having you near me and then poof, you're gone. Nice idea, Jack." I snapped. His jaw dropped and he stared at me. "Do me a favor and don't waster your time on me. Just leave me alone. Even if it doesn't seem right to you, make it easy for me." I said more calmly. He glared this time.

"I'm not wasting my time. And no matter how we part, it'll be hard. All I wanna do is spend my last days with you. Only you." he told me.

_I'm so tired but I can't sleep  
Standin' on the edge of something much too deep  
It's funny how we feel so much but we cannot say a word  
We are screaming inside, but we can't be heard_

"I'm tired of spending people's last days with them! I'm tired of it! I'm tired of people I care for being ripped out of my life unexpectedly. I'm tired of getting you to someone, loving someone and then losing them. I'm tired of it, Jack!" I yelled. He tried to grab my arm but I pulled away.

"Emilie, you're not losing me. I'm going away for a while. You don't loose everyone, what makes you say that?" he asked. I laughed and threw my hands in the air.

"Look at my past! I lost my real parents, I lost Charlotte and Charlie, my brother, and Abigail. Angel left and now you're leaving." I cried.

"You really need to let go of the past." he said seriously. I glared at him.

"How can I do that when it won't let me go?" I yelled. "I knew I shouldn't have gotten close to you." I mumbled. Jack sighed and grabbed my arms roughly.

_But I will remember you  
Will you remember me?  
Don't let your life pass you by  
Weep not for the memories_

"Don't say that." I told me firmly. I tried to pull away but he held me tight. I finally gave in and fell into his chest. He wrapped his arms around me and held me tight. He let me cry until I felt like I couldn't cry anymore.

"I'm afraid." I whispered into his chest. He pushed me away just enough to look at me.

"Of what?" he asked softly.

"Of being without you. You've kept me same these past few months. I'm afraid of not having you here and me not being okay anymore." I confessed. He pulled me back again and kissed my head.

"I know. I'm sorry." he whispered. I took a deep breath and spoke again.

_I'm so afraid to love you, but more afraid to loose  
Clinging to a past that doesn't let me choose  
Once there was a darkness, deep and endless night  
You gave me everything you had, oh you gave me light_

"I'm afraid of you leaving and forgetting me. I'm scared that when you come back everything will be different. That we'll loose what we have and not be able to get it back." I ranted into his chest. I took a breath and looked up at him. "I'm afraid that when you come back you won't be my Jack anymore." I cried. He wiped my tears from under my eyes and kissed my lips softly. He pulled back just an inch and looked in my eyes.

"I will always be your Jack. I could never forget you and we will never lose what we have. Not even the unspoken feelings. They will never go away." he promised. I smiled a little and fell back into his chest. "If you want me to stay..." he trailed off. I pulled away from him and stared.

_And I will remember you  
Will you remember me?  
Don't let your life pass you by  
Weep not for the memories_

"Jack, I could never ask you that." I whispered. "Even though I don't want you to go, I would never ask you to do that. You've worked you're ass off to get here. Don't let it pass. I'll be fine." I told him. I wasn't sure if it was relief of sadness that crossed his face but I ignored it. He needed to do this. I knew he wanted this and he need to go.

"Okay." he whispered. I sighed and could only hope that he was telling the truth. I didn't want to loose him and I sure as hell didn't want to loose what we had. But people change, they grow apart and sometimes they just stop seeing one another. Time is a killer and so is distance.

_And I will remember you  
Will you remember me?  
Don't let your life pass you by  
Weep not for the memories  
Weep not for the memories_

* * *

Here we are on yet another day we are all dreading. Jack leaves today. He's going to LA for god only knows how long and he'll be doing god only knows what. Okay so maybe that was a little harsh. He wouldn't do that stuff anymore. I trusted him and believed in him. I already knew that it was going to be hell when I woke up. The sky was a dark shade of grey and I could see the lightening in the background. Mother nature always had to make my bad days worse.

"Diddle?" Bobby called through my door.

"Come in." I mumbled into my pillow. He creaked the door open and walked over to my bed. "Yes?" I asked. He sighed and rubbed my back.

"Everyone's awake." he told me. I shrugged and kept my face in the pillow. "Ma made breakfast. She'd like you to come down." he finished. I sighed and rolled over to look at him.

"This sucks." I stated. He chuckled and nodded.

"I agree. I may fight with my brothers but it doesn't mean I don't love them." he told me softly. I sat up and sighed again.

"This just sucks." I repeated. He stood up and held out his hand.

"Well, you still got me and Jerry." he winked. I made a gagging noise as he drug me to the door.

"Like that's any compensation. Don't worry, you two shall find some reason to leave and then I'll be all alone." I over exaggerated. Now ti was his turn to make the gagging noise.

"You're such a drama queen." he laughed as we found our way into the kitchen. I looked around and saw Evelyn, Jack and Jerry at the table. Evelyn looked up and smiled.

"Oh good you're up. Pancakes?" she smiled. I nodded and sat next to Bobby. Jack and Jerry both gave me a weird look. Usually, I sat next to Jack but not today. I honestly didn't realize it until I looked around. Bobby gave me a sad smile and handed me a glass of juice.

"Thanks." I mumbled. We started o eat in silence until Bobby threw his fork down.

"Okay, so does anyone have anything to say?" he asked. He looked around and Jerry cleared his throat.

"So are you excited about going to LA?" Jerry asked slowly. Jack nodded a little.

"Yeah, pretty excited. James and Troy are excited too. It's much different than Detroit." he told us.

"Lots of hot girls too." Bobby joked.

"Lots of Lydia's to pass around." I mumbled. Jack and Jerry coughed and Bobby smirked. I saw a uneasy glance from Evelyn and sighed. Jerry saved me though.

"I uh, so where are you staying Jack?" he asked looking to his left. Jack wiped his mouth and gave me a quick glance.

"We have an apartment set up in downtown LA." he told us. I bit my lip and kept my next comment to myself not wanting to upset Evelyn.

"When do you start working on the album?" Jerry asked. Jack sighed and set his fork down.

"When we get there. There's nothing really to say so we can eat in peace. I understand." he said a little annoyed.

That's what we did. We all sat in the very tension filled room and ate in complete utter silence. I could feel him stare at me from the other side of the table but I kept my focus on my food. I wasn't sure what was wrong but I wasn't ready. I wasn't ready for him to leave and I just had a really bad feeling about this.

* * *

Breakfast was horrible. Emilie was fine these past few weeks and now all of a sudden she was distant. I could understand why but I really didn't want to leave on a bad note. I hoped maybe she would cheer up throughout the day.

"Jack, you got all the old music?" Troy asked walking out of our old practice room. We were packing up our equipment so we wouldn't have to do it later.

"Yeah I got it. I think that's it." I told him. He nodded and put the rest of the boxes in the van.

"So how's Em handling this?" he asked. I sighed and leaned against the van.

"At first she seemed okay. We had a long talk about it but now she seems a little distant." I told him. He stood next to me and nodded his head.

"Yeah well you were all she had for a while and now you're leaving. I mean sure she'll have Paisley but you and her were close." he told me. I rubbed my face and took a deep breath.

"I know and that's why it's so hard to leave. I wanna go but I don't." I confessed. He looked over and smiled.

"I know. As weird as it sounds I don't wanna leave either. Sure me and Pais fight and never get along but she's still my sister. I'm gonna miss her. But you and Em, you guys will be okay. Just stay in touch." he finished. I nodded and looked around.

"Well, be better get going." I told him. I closed the back door of the van and locked it.

"Jack!" a distant voice yelled. Troy and I looked around and saw a figure running to us.

"Who the hell..." I asked trying to focus on who it was. Troy was the first to curse the world when we saw her.

"What the fuck does she want?" Troy mumbled and turned away. Lydia ran up smiling and stopped in front of me. Very close in front of me.

"Lydia." I greeted taking a step back from her. She ran a hand through her hair and smiled.

"Hey Jack." she said sweetly. I waited for her to continue but she said nothing.

"What do you want?" I asked cooly. She frowned a little and then lit back up.

"I heard you're going to LA?" she asked. I nodded and looked over at Troy who was glaring at her.

"Yeah, what's it to you?" Troy snapped. She shot him a nasty look and grabbed my hand.

"Jackie, you know I've always wanted to go to LA. I was wondering if you have any room for me in the van?" she smiled innocently. Even a blind man could see through that.

"No." I said casually.

"He doesn't want you anymore." Troy smiled. She glared at us and crossed her arms.

"And I don't want him either." she said to Troy. "I just need a ride there. I'll give you money and all. I got a friend there so I won't bug you after that." she told me. I looked over at Troy. He waved me over and I walked away.

"I wonder how much she has?" he asked. I shrugged and looked back at her.

"How much?" I yelled to her. She grinned and pulled out a wad of money.

"I'll give you 2 grand." she smiled. My eyes widened. "I've been saving up. I really want to go to LA. Jack, you know this." she told me seriously.

"Only to LA and you leave us alone, right?" I asked.

"Yes, I promise I won't bug you guys." she smiled. "Unless you want me to stick around."

"Not a chance in hell." Troy glared at her.

"Fine but I want an answer." she demanded.I looked back and Troy and he walked over and grabbed the money.

"You bitch and you're out." he spat. "And we don't do refunds, honey." he finished sweetly. She rolled her eyes and kissed my cheek.

"I'll meet you later to leave. Bye!" she smiled and walked away. I sighed and looked at the sky.

"God, help me." I mumbled and climbed into the van.

* * *

I sat around the house with Bobby while Jack was gone packing up the band equipment. Jerry had said his final goodbye earlier because the girls had a recital.

"So you and Paisley seem to be good freinds." Bobby stated walking into the living room. I nodded and flipped through the channels.

"Yeah, I like her. WE get along, like the same things. Even though it doesn't look it." I told him. He nodded.

"So when do you start school?" Bobby asked sitting next to me on the couch. I crinkled my forehead and reached for my purse. "You don't even know." he teased. I stuck my tongue out and pulled put my paper.

"Eek!" I squealed. "I start Monday, Sept. 1. What's today?" I asked him. He looked at the newspaper and smirked.

"August 25. You gotta week. Do you need anything?" he asked. I shrugged and sat back.

"I guess the norm. Notebooks, paper and pens." I told him. He nodded and flipped the tv to a car show.

"Paisley starts with you too, right?" he asked. I nodded and leaned back into the couch.

"Yeah, she's taking photography classes." I said softly.

"Yeah and you wanna work with Detroit's youth. Good luck with that, by the way." he laughed. I punched his shoulder and we watched the show.

"I've been a bitch today, huh?" I asked suddenly.

"That was random." he mumbled then turned to me. "But yes, you have. Did you see the fairy's face when you didn't sit next to him? Talk about breaking the poor kid's heart." he told me seriously. It amazed me how he could do that.

"I just don't want him to go." I admitted.

"Ask him to stay." he said casually.

"He told me to ask him and I gracefully declined." I informed him. He gave me a surprised look and set the remote down.

"He asked you if you wanted him to stay?" he asked. I nodded. "And you said no?" he clarified. I nodded again. "Even though you want him to stay?" I sighed. "What in the hell did Mark slip you? You are messed up!" he exclaimed. I glared at him and moved away from him.

"I am not. I can't aks him to stay Bobby. He's always wanted this." I spat. He nodded and held his arm out. I scooted back over and leaned on his shoulder.

"Then go with him." he told me. I shook my head.

"I'm starting school. And I don't wanna live in LA." I sighed. He stayed quiet for then on. There was no other choice. Jack was leaving and I was staying here. That was the plain and simple lonely truth. We sat there until I heard the van pull up. I sighed and looked at Bobby.

"I guess it's now or never." I mumbled. He chuckled and pulled me off the couch. We walked outside and met Jack and Troy.

"Where's James?" I asked. My heart sank when Jack looked surprised. So maybe I was bitch today.

"We're picking him up on our way out. He's spending time with his mom." he told me softly. I nodded and looked down at my feet. I heard Bobby sigh and pushed me to Jack.

"Go talk and quit pouting." he told us. I rolled my eyes and walked over toward the road. I turned to him and sighed.

"Sorry, for being a wench today." I mumbled. He smirked.

"It's okay. I understand. I was just afraid we would leave on a bad foot." he told me softly. I sighed and pouted a little.

"Agh, me either. I don't know what was with me. I'm sorry though." I apologized again. He smiled and pulled me to his chest for a hug.

"There we go!" Bobby and Troy laughed from behind us. I flicked them off and Bobby faked being hurt. I hugged Jack back and sighed.

"Ya gonna miss me?" he whispered. I nodded and tried to hold the tears back. He kissed my head and hugged me tighter. "I'm gonna miss you so much, Em." he told me. I heard his voice falter ever so slightly and looked up at him. He leaned his head down and I was leaning up to meet his lips when a familiar shrill voice broke the moment.

"Jackie!" Lydia called out. I pulled back and looked at the bouncy red head walking up to us. I glared at her smug face and Jack sighed.

"I thought you were going to leave me." she smiled at him.

WHAT?! Leave her? I pulled away farther from Jack and he tried to grab me.

"Let me explain." he said holding his hands out. I continued to glare at him as Bobby and Troy walked up.

"Leave her?" I asked trying to contain me screams. Jack was about to open his mouth when Lydia stepped in front of me.

"I'm going with them to LA. He didn't tell you?" she asked. I felt the lump of tears rise in my throat but the exploding anger was close behind as I looked to Jack.

"Jack.." I said in a strained voice. He glared at Lydia and gently placed his hands on my arms.

"She needs a way to get to LA. She's paying us to take her then that's it. I swear." he told me. I breathed in and out and stared at him. I was silent and well you know about the calm before the storm. Well my silence was the calm. Now for the storm...

"Why?! She needs a way, she can whore herself there. She's used to sucking a little here and there to get what she wants." I screamed. Lydia stepped to me and I snapped my head in her direction. "Say anything and I sweat to god you will regret ever walking in the pool hall, you understand me?" I yelled. "She put us through hell, she put you through hell. And you're going to sink back to her level?!" I yelled back at Jack. Troy, Lydia and Bobby had stepped away.

"I'm not sinking to no one's level. She just needs a ride. That's it." Jack yelled at me. If I wasn't so pissed I would have been shocked he yelled at me but not now.

"Yeah she needs a ride and you're willing and able to give her one, huh?" I smiled. He glared at me and pointed a finger in my face. I grabbed his sleeve and pulled it down.

"Listen, she's paying us. We need that money. We get t LA and she's gone. So get off your fucking high horse and get over it!" he screamed in my face. I glared at him and before I knew it, my palm came flat across his face. He rubbed his cheek and glared at me.

"Anything else?" he asked calmly. I looked at him an felt a surge of misery. Yes, I had a lot to say. A lot of bad things but a million good ones. Ones that said I don't want you to go, I want you to stay, I'm going to miss you and a few hundred that said I'm sorry. But none came out.

"Yeah, go to hell and take your slut with you." I growled. He nodded and moved my hand from his wrist.

"Fine." he mumbled. "Let's go." he ordered Troy and Lydia.

I watched as a solemn looking Troy walked to the passenger side and a smug Lydia crawled into the back. Bobby came over to hug me as they drove off. All the thing I wanted to say floated in my head. I felt the lump of tears finally emerge as I fell into Bobby's arms. He didn't try to say the right thing because there was nothing right to say. I had put my own selfishness before my dignity and let him leave. But he had put his dignity to the side and let that bitch go with him.

_Secrets told in the pictures on your skin  
Hours fade into days that never end  
I see myself reflected in your eyes  
And I hate the way I'm wearing all these lies_

_So I let you go  
And I watch you leave  
And I hold my breathSo you don't hear me scream  
When you walk away  
But the words are only in my head  
It's not what I said  
It's what I didn't say_

_Is she everything you wanted her to be?  
Yeah, I bet she never breaks your heart like me  
So it's one more night I cover up with you  
And I hate myself for what I didn't do_

_Should've known better, now  
All I have left is a permanent stain  
The only part of you I get to keep forever  
To prove I lived this pain_

_So I let you go  
And I watch you leave  
And I hold my breath  
So you don't hear me scream  
When you walk away  
But the words are only in my head  
It's not what I said  
It's what I didn't say_

_Maybe I was never as smart as I thought  
Maybe we can never be as good as we want  
Maybe you just didn't need me enough  
Maybe we're too clever to be falling in love like this  
Like this_

_Secrets told in the silence of my sin  
And I'm the one who loses in the end_

* * *

I Will Remember You by Sarah McLachlan and What I Didn't Say by Saving Jane


	8. Torn

_So this was a little overdue but I've been a tad bit busy. My two favortie children are in town, my 7 year old neice and 4 year old nephew! So I've been busy getting back into the aunt role again! But here it is!_

_BEG75- Looky, I got more reviews...lol! That's okay with the sorta late review. It made it in before this chapter so it's all good. Glad you like it this much! It makes my day to read your reviews! :) So Thanks!_

_Alli Copen- Lol...Thanks! Thr lady above you said the same thing about it needing more reviews. But again, it gets rave reviews on another site I post on! I'm glad you like it though. Every story needs some drama, and FB is a very dramatics movie. But I'm so happy you like it! :)_

_Lyris88- Well, welcome to the wonderful world of FB fics! I'm glad my story is your first, that makes my day! I'm glad you like it though! _

_MissIndependent101- Ahh who actually does like Lydia? rooms gets quiet Exactly...lol. I had to add the mean girl...lol._

* * *

I never really knew how if felt to loose someone and them still be alive. All my life every time I lost someone, they died. But for the first time I've lost someone and they are alive. I think that's worse then losing someone to death. When you loose someone to death, you cope with it. You now you'll never see them again but you deal with it. You know there's not a chance to say what you want to say. But when you loose someone to life, it's different. The pang of guilt eats at you. The fact that you could say those things to them and that you could see them again make is more difficult to not be with them. The fact that Jack was out there in LA somewhere liked to kill me. We said we didn't want to leave on bad terms and that's exactly what we did. Bobby and Paisley told me over and over again that it wasn't just me to blame. We both said everything except the things we needed to say. We said really bad and hurtful things and he just left. And I didn't stop him. We were both at fault and it took me sometime to realize that.

"Diddle!" Bobby yelled through my door. I walked over and opened it. I stared at the greasy haired man and let him in.

"You can't be yelling through my door Bobby. Other people live on this floor and I don't think they appreciate Bobby Mercer yelling in the hallways." I told him shutting the door.

It had been a little over half a year since Jack had left. I moved out about 4 months ago and got a place on my own. Paisley lived a floor down and we liked it. We were going to move in together but we wanted our freedom of our own place, so we opted for a place close together.

"Sorry, but Ma wants to know what you want for birthday dinner." he told me. I sighed and looked at the calendar.

"Bobby, it's March, my birthday's in July." I informed him. He bit his lip and sighed.

"Ok so maybe I had another reason to come over. But she asked me to ask you anyways. You know how she is." he told me. I nodded and sat down on the couch. He sat next to me and sighed again.

"Quit sighing and talk." I ordered. He smirked and looked over at me.

"Jack called." he said simply. I nodded and stared at him. After a few moments of silence I spoke.

"Okay. Good for him." I said sarcastically. Bobby glared at me and leaned back.

"He wants to call you but isn't sure if you'll talk to him." he told me. I nodded again and picked up my book.

"Tell him to find out for himself." I said cool.

"He just wants to see how you are." he told me. "He's tired of hearing it from us."

"Tell him to find out for himself." I repeated. He huffed and stood up.

"Emilie, stop being a bitch. He's the first to reach out. Give him some leverage. You keep holding this against him and you'll turn cold. Don't do this to yourself." he told me firmly and walked out.

I jumped when he slammed the door. I sat there looking at my hands and chewed my cheek. I had held this horrible cloud over me and Jack since he had been gone. I hadn't talked to him and he hadn't tried calling me. Evelyn and Bobby told me he asked about me and well, I asked about him too. But I went to Paisley for that. I only asked simple questions and she only answered them. I didn't ask about what he was doing or who he was seeing, or even if Lydia had stuck around. She knew those answers but I didn't want to.

I sighed and stood up when a tiny knock came from my door. I opened it to see the bright eyes Paisley smiling.

"Hey." she said walking past me. I closed the door and walked back over to the couch.

"What's up?" I asked. She sat down and looked over at me.

"I saw Bobby leave. He looked pissed." she said. I laughed and grabbed my soda.

"Pissed is an understatement." I told her. She bit her lip and nodded.

"I'm guessing Bobby asked you what Jack wanted him to?" she asked. I looked over at her.

"You knew?" I asked. She nodded and I sighed. "Yeah, he asked. I got bitchy as usual and he told me to stop holding the grudge before I turn into a cold bitch." I recanted the words from Bobby's mouth.

"Well, he's right. You and Jack have been stubborn long enough. Neither one of you wanted to reach out first and well, now he is. Give him that." she begged.

"Why?" I asked. She gaped at me and leaned over to me. She grabbed my hands and looked at me in my eyes.

"Because he misses you. He cares about you and he wants to talk to you." she told me softly. I shook my head.

"If he missed me, he would have called. If he cared, he would have told Lydia to kiss his ass and go away. And if he wants to talk to me, he can pick up the phone and call me." I snapped at her. She pulled back and glared at me.

"You've already turned cold. Get over yourself, Emilie."she spat and stood up. She walked over to the counter and took a sticky note and wrote something down.

"What is that?" I asked as she stuck it on the fridge. She turned to me and pointed to the pink note.

"Jack's cell number. Call him when you decide to come back to your senses and be civil." she told me. I bit my lip and she walked out. I stared at the pink sticky note and sighed. I walked back to my room and jumped into the shower. I had a date tonight and nothing was going to get me down before this. Not even Jack.

* * *

I knew she wouldn't listen. She was as stubborn as she was smart. I knew we left on really bad terms but damn, I was reaching out. Granted it took me nearly seven months but I was doing it. Better late than never, right? Apparently, not to Emilie. Bobby called me livid because she had shot him down and then Paisley called and she didn't have any better luck than my brother. If Paisley couldn't get through to her, no one could. Before I left I could have gotten through, even if it was about me. But now there was no way I could get her to talk to me, let alone understand.

"Earth to Jack-O!" James yelled from behind me. I looked at him and shrugged.

"Sorry, my bad." I mumbled. He gave me a weird look and set his drum sticks down. I took my guitar off my neck and sat on the amp. James pulled up a chair and stared at me.

"Spill." he told me. It was talk time now.

"I hate when you do this." I informed him. He smirked and handed me a cigarette.

"Well, if you didn't look like a freaking little boy who lost his puppy, I wouldn't have to do this." he retorted. I nodded and agreed.

"It's Emilie..." I started.

"When is it not Emilie?" he laughed. I glared at him and he held his hands up. "Sorry, keep going."

"I asked Bobby to ask her if I could call her. Well, he asked and she flipped out." I told him. He bit his lip and looked at me.

"Jack it's been like half a year. I'd be pissed too." he told me. I glared at him again but this time he didn't mock defense.

"She could have called me." I reminded him. He nodded.

"Yes, she could have. But you knew how she felt about Lydia yet you let her come with us." he told me.

"So you're blaming me?" I asked offended.

"No, I'm saying that Lydia coming along is what started it. You should have told her. Instead you were going to try to keep it from her." he told me. I wanted to say something, anything back but he got me there. I sighed and rubbed my face.

"I know but I just wanna talk to her." I mumbled.

"Well, maybe you should rethink that. What do you think she's going to say when you tell her you let Lydia stick around?" he asked. I groaned and looked at him.

"I'm going to guess that you won't let me keep that tiny fact to myself if I do talk to her?" I asked. He smirked and shook his head.

"Keeping things from her is what got you into this mess in the first place." he reminded me. I nodded and stood up.

"Yeah well, it's not like she'd go away if I asked her to." I told him. He laughed and started to pack up the drum set. I gathered my guitar and notes and we made out way back to the house.

It was a nice place. It had three bedrooms and two bathrooms. It was on the outskirts of LA and was newly renovated. We had a nice sized backyard and a pool, great for parties and we had a lot of them. I mean, it's LA and we're in a band. We'd be crazy not to throw parties or go to them. Sure, I felt guilty sometimes but I was having fun. Before we had the fight, that's what Emilie told me to do. She just wanted me to have fun.

"Jackie!" Lydia squealed when I walked into the house. I rolled me eyes and set my guitar down.

"What?" I asked. She frowned and crossed her arms.

"What crawled up your ass and died?" she asked. I glared at her and walked to my bedroom.

"You, Lydia." I yelled to her. I heard James laugh and Lydia slap him before I shut my door. I plopped down on my bed and sighed. I laid there for a few minutes and then heard my door creak open.

"Go away, Lydia." I told her.

"James told me about that girl." she said casually. I sat up on my elbows and stared at her.

"That girl has a name." I snapped at her. She smirked and leaned on my dresser in front of my bed.

"Whatever. He told me that she basically blew you off." she smiled. "And not the good kinda blow." she finished.. I shook my head and laid back on the bed.

"So what?" I asked. She let out a tiny giggle and walked over to the edge of my bed. I leaned back up when she stood between my legs. She started unbuttoning her shirt and bit her lip.

"So I though you might need a way to release some tension." she said softly. She reached the last button and let the shirt slowly fall off her shoulders. She ran her hands up my thighs and to my jeans. I grabbed her hand before she could reach in my boxers.

"What's wrong?" she asked. I smirked and pushed her back off of me.

"You." I said redoing my jeans. She glared at me and grabbed her shirt.

"You're an ass." she spat as she buttoned up her shirt.

"It kills you doesn't it?" I asked her before she left. "That I want her and not you." I finished. She flipped me off and stormed out of the room. I looked up at the roof and sighed. She'll never be Emilie and I'll never want anyone else. So why do I constantly put myself and her through this hell.

* * *

I walked into the restaurant and scanned the room for the dark haired man that I had met in class. His name was Jake. We had a few academics together and started talking about a month ago. He finally asked me out last week and after two rain checks tonight we were finally meeting for dinner. I saw a hand go up in the air and I smiled. I walked to the back of the room and he stood up.

"Jake." I greeted. He smiled and hugged me.

"Thanks for not cancelling." he joked. I laughed and sat down.

"The first was your fault." I retorted. He nodded and smiled over at me.

"You look nice." he complimented.

"Thanks. You don't look so bad yourself." I smiled. We talked for a few minutes and started eating. We were having a good time until my phone started ringing. I ignored it the first time but Jake laughed when it started ringing again.

"Just go outside and answer it. I'm going to the men's room." he told me. I nodded and walked outside. I didn't even look at the ID when I opened the phone.

"Hello." I asked breathlessly. There was silence but I could hear the faint sound of breathing. "Hello?" I asked again.

"Em." he said. I froze and looked at the number, it was a long distance number.

"Jack?" I asked softly. I heard his deep chuckle and it sent chills through my body.

"Who else do you know in California besides me?" he joked. I smiled a little and looked up at the sky.

"Troy and James." I answered. He laughed again and I heard him inhale on a cigarette.

"True. You got me there." he said. We were silent for a minute until he spoke again.

"Are you busy?" he asked. I looked into the restaurant and Jake was no where to be seen.

"Umm I was having dinner but not busy." I told him.

"You want me to call you later?" he asked. I sighed and remembered what Bobby and Paisley said. I needed to throw him bone, be nice.

"No, it's fine." I said softly.

"So how have you been?" he asked slowly. I bit my lip and held back my laugh.

"Pretty good. Just going to school." I told him.

"That's good." he said. Silence came over us again and he sighed,

"I miss you." I whispered. I felt tears in my eyes and I couldn't hold it in anymore.

"You sure have a nice way of showing it." I said cooly. I heard him groan and knew it was coming.

"Emilie, I'm throwing myself under a truck here. Give me something to work with." he told me firmly.

"You've had seven fucking months to work with and work yourself out from underneath that truck, Jack." I snapped.

"Emilie, I don't wanna. I wanna talk like civilized people." he told me. I felt the hot tears roll down my cold cheeks and sniffed.

"I waited months to talk to you. But now it's too late. I don't wanna talk. There's nothing more to say." I told him trying to control my voice.

"Emilie, please don't do this." I begged. I looked back and saw Jake staring at me.

"Listen, my date's back. I gotta go." I said quickly and hung up. I slid the phone in my pocket and smiled at Jake.

"You alright?" he asked. I nodded and grabbed his hand.

"Yeah." I said and looked around. "How about we go back to my place and relax?" I offered. He grinned and nodded. I smiled and waved a cab to go back to my place.

* * *

I stared at the phone after she hung up. I had to go and tell her I missed her. It was true, I did miss her. But I knew that was the wrong thing to say. Then she landed the big one on me. She was on a date. With who? Bobby and Paisley never said anything about a boyfriend. God, a boyfriend. That was supposed to be me.

"If you're waiting for it to talk to you, you'll be sitting there for a while." Troy joked walking into the kitchen. I stared at him blankly and he sat down.

"Dude, what's wrong?" he asked. I set the phone down and tapped the table. I stood up quick and grabbed my jacket.

"Wake James up. We're going back to the studio." I told them and walked to the door.

I heard Troy yell for James and we left a few minutes later. They kept asking me what was wrong but I stayed quiet. We got to the studio and we walked in. I walked over to the table in the room and grabbed the pen and paper.

"Jack, what are we doing here?" James asked. I looked up at him.

"I gotta song in my head and I need it out." I told him. Troy and James looked at each other.

"He was on the phone and then hung up like this." Troy told James quietly.

"I can hear you." I told them loudly. They shut up and a few minutes later I grabbed my guitar. I told them the basic notes and told them just to go along with me. I fixed my mic and tuned my guitar. "Ready?" I asked. They nodded and James started the count.

_Here I go again I promised myself I wouldn't think of you today  
It's been seven months and counting  
You've moved on  
I still feel exactly the same  
It's just that everywhere I go all the buildings know your name  
Like photographs and memories of love  
Steel and granite reminders  
The city calls your name and I can't move on_

_Ever since you've been gone  
The lights go out the same  
The only difference is  
You call another name  
To your love  
To your lover now  
To your love  
The lover after me_

_Am I all alone in the universe?  
There's no love on these streets  
I have given mine away to a world that didn't want it anyway  
So this is my new freedom  
It's funny  
I don't remember being chained  
But nothing seems to make sense anymore  
Without you I'm always twenty minutes late_

_Ever since you've been gone  
The lights go out the same  
The only difference isYou call another name  
To your love  
To your lover now  
To your love  
The lover after me_

_And time goes by so slowly  
The nights are cold and lonely  
I shouldn't be holding on  
But I'm still holding on for you_

_Here I go again  
I promised myself I wouldn't think of you today  
But I'm standing at your doorway  
I'm calling out your name because I can't move on_

_Ever since you've been gone  
The lights go out the same  
The only difference is  
You call another name  
To your love  
To your lover now  
To your love  
The lover after me_

I could barely bring myself to turn around. The tension in the room told me they knew you I had talked to and that she was with someone else. I knew it was my fault. If I had only told Lydia no or at least told Emilie that she was coming instead of lying to her. And now I had an even bigger secret to tell her. Lydia had been hanging around since we had gotten there. I hadn't been with her but she didn't go away. And now I was afraid I'd never get he back because of what I had done. I knew I had to go back to fix things but that wouldn't be anytime soon.

* * *

I stayed up all night drinking coffee and smoking. Yes, I had picked up a bad habit since Jack had been gone. It soothed me though. I had a few beers with Jake and he left about 10 that night. There was no goodbye kiss or any kind of next date question. We went into to see what would come out of it and it simply was just dinner. He was a great guy and a cute one but nothing would come out if it. We'd stay friends but nothing more.

I heard a knock at the door and walked out of my room. I opened the door and saw the mail lady.

"Here's your mail." she said sweetly. I thanked her and flipped through my mail. I smiled and ran to sit down when I saw I got a letter from Angel. I ripped it open and started reading.

_Diddle,_

_I know this is a little late but I've been busy. I got to do the city rounds a few days ago. You wouldn't believe the mess over here. How are you? How's school? Do good so you can teach Amelia and Danielle. That's all Jer went on about in his last letter. The girls teacher is an idiot and so on. Have you talked to Jack lately? Ma said she was worried about you two. Diddle, don't be stubborn. Do what you've always told me, go with what feels right. Well, I'm so sorry this is short but I gotta run. I hope you're okay and I'll talk to ya later. Love you, Diddle_

_Angel_

I smiled and folded it back up. I made a mental note to write him later on. I heard a knock at my door and walked over again. I opened it to see Paisley standing there. I leaned on the frame and stared at her.

"So who was this guy you went out with?" she asked. I looked at her shocked and pulled her in.

"How did you know about my date with Jake?" I asked. She smirked and sat down on the couch.

"Troy called me yelling because Jack is pissed and moping. One minute he's hitting things, the next he's quiet and writing." she told me. I squeezed my eyes shut and rubbed my temples.

"Jack called last night while I was having dinner with this guy from class. We started to fight and I told him I was on a date and hung up." I confessed. She hit my arm and I hit her back.

"Stupid." she told me and hit me again. I rubbed my arm and glared at her.

"It wasn't a real date at least not after the night. We're just going to be friends." I told her. She crossed her arms and stared at me.

"Well, you really upset Jack. So now you two are even. He pissed you off and now you pissed him off. Even, so call a truce." she told me. I laughed in her face and backed up when she held up her hand.

"He started it!" I yelled. She stood in front of me and glared.

"And you continued. Now you both need to finish it." she yelled back. I pouted and watched her walk out. I sat down on the couch and sank into the cushions. I thought about what she had told me. Jack was really upset? Well now he gets a taste of what I have been put through these past months. The crying, the anger and the pure hurt that he had caused was finally starting to go away and now he was feeling it. And I'll be damned if he drags me back down. I'm tired of hurting and tired of crying over him.

And that's what I repeated over and over again in my mind. But still in the back of my mind there was the tiny voice that told me to stop lying to myself and get over it all. You can't deny how you feel and I believed that. I cared about him and wanted him here but I was still mad at him and I wanted him to hurt. I was torn between two totally different feelings. And that was what hurt the most. I was conflicted and Angel's words ran through my head. _Go with what feels right_. But what happens when both feel right? What do I do then? Where do I go from there?

* * *

Lover After Me by Savage Garden


	9. There You'll Be

_BEG75, I'm so happy you're liking this! OfLoveAndLust, at least you review! So it doesn't matter if you repeat youself...lol. So I had a time writing this because the movie is coming into play. But I manage well. I said this on the other site I psoted. Yes, I am adding the movie. But it will only be in Emilie and Jack's POV's. So only things Jack saw and places where I'm adding Emilie in. So it will be a tad bit different but hopefully, just as good. But I have chapter 10 done and am so proud of it...lol. It took me a good minute because I severely burnt my right thumb over the fourth of July weekend. I got a 2nd degree burn and it hurts to type but I did it!! LOL Well, enjoy!!_

* * *

The months passed pretty quick after that. Before I knew it my first year of school had gone and my birthday had passed. I hadn't talked to Jack since then and apparently he wasn't asking about me because Bobby and Paisley never brought him up anymore.

And speaking of Bobby. One day out of the blue he packs his stuff and leaves. Said he had a job in Chicago and he needed to take it to help a friend out. I wasn't too worried. He came back every so often to see me and I even went up to see him one weekend. He was working at some bar. Bouncing, bartending and managing all in one. At least he wasn't lying about it. I was bummed to have him gone too. But he stayed in touch the most and I still had Jerry. Him and his brood kept me busy.

"Emilie!" I heard Paisley yell from my living room. I sighed and rolled out of bed. I walked into the room and stared at her.

"What?" I snapped. She smirked and sat down on the couch.

"I just wanted to see what you were doing." she said causally. I stared at her and smirked.

"Who is he?" I asked and jumped on the couch next to her. She grinned and clapped her hands together.

"His name is Andrew. He's a tattoo artist down at Livid Art. He's so nice and sweet." she gushed. I smiled and listened to her talk about him. "He has all these tattoos but is totally not what he seems. He's got a tiny attitude but only to people who give him one. And he asked me out!" she squealed. I laughed and patted her knee.

"That's great. When are you going out?" I asked. She bit her lip and smiled sheepishly at me.

"I didn't answer him yet." she confessed. I gaped at her and smacked her arm.

"Why? He sounds like a god and you don't answer him." I shrieked. I grabbed her face and looked at her eyes. "Are you high?" I asked.

"No." she smiled. "I kinda wanted you to help me out." she told me. I held my breath and waited for the crazy idea that was bound to come out of her mouth.

"Spill." I told her.

"I want you to hit on him." she said smiling. I burst into hysterics and nearly fell off the couch. She glared at me and I stopped.

"You're serious?" I asked. She nodded and grabbed my hand.

"Dead serious. I want to see if he's playing me or not. And you're way pretty and I want you to flaunt it." she told me, dead serious. I thought about it and looked back at her.

"What if I'm not his type?" I asked. She glared at me again and stood up.

"You have boobs, an ass and legs. Most importantly you have what they want and that's between those pretty little legs of yours. Therefore, you are his type." she told me. I reluctantly stood up and agreed.

About fifteen minutes later I was parked in front of Livid Art with Heather. She told me his name and told me to go in and ask about a tattoo.

"Just act casual." she told me. I sighed and got out of the car. I walked into the shop and looked around. I started flipping through the books they had and tried to come up with a plan. Unfortunately, my thinking was cut short when someone tapped me on my shoulder. I turned around to see a very tall and handsome man smiling down at me. He was bald and had tattoos everywhere.

"Can I help you?" he asked. I smiled and nodded.

"Depends?" I said sweetly. "Are you Andrew?" I asked. He grinned and nodded.

"Yes, I am. How can I help you?" he asked. I bit my lip and turned back to the pages.

"I wanna tattoo. And I heard you are the man to come too." I smiled.

"Do you know what you want?" he asked. I shook my head innocently and earned a sly grin.

"How about where you want it?" he asked. Again I shook my head.

"I'm kinda a virgin to all this, so to speak." I told him sweetly. He tilted his head and smirked. He grabbed my hand and pulled me down a few books. He flipped through one and pointed it out.

"I think this would suit you." he said. I looked to the picture he pointed to and tilted my head. It was a tiny moon with stars around it. It was cute but I wasn't really planning on getting a tattoo, was I?

"Where?" I asked still looking at it. He pulled the side of my shirt of my shoulder and tapped my blade.

"Here." he smiled. I bit my lip and looked at him.

"How much?" I asked. He smirked and looked out the window.

"Your friend's got it covered." he told me. I dropped my jaw and looked out the window to see heather driving away. "She wanted to get you outta the house and, quote unquote, get you around testosterone. So she asked me if I'd play along." he told me.

"I hate her." I mumbled. He laughed and patted the chair. I straddled it and pulled my shirt down some more.

"So I heard you and Jack were an item?" he asked sticking the outline on my blade.

"No. We weren't. We were just friends." I sighed. He laughed and rubbed some gel on my shoulder.

"This might sting but I need you to be still." he said and touched the needle to my skin. I bit my lip and buried my face in my arms. "But you felt more than just friends, right?" he asked. I nodded slowly.

"I thought we did. Then when he was leaving I found out he was taking his ex with him." I told him. I heard him huff and he took the needle off my skin to wipe it.

"Lydia?" he asked. I laughed this time.

"Don't tell me you know her." I said. He grunted and touched the needle to my skin again. It didn't hurt to bad but it stung every once in a while.

"Who doesn't know Lydia?" he joked. I laughed again. "Have you talked to Jack?" he asked.

"Not since March. He called and we fought and we hung up. Haven't talked since." I told him.

"Why not?" he asked. I sighed and wondered how long this was going to take.

"Because we're stubborn and neither one of us will admit we're wrong." I sighed.

"Were you wrong?" he asked. Did he always ask this many questions?

"He was wrong too." I defended myself before answering.

"I'm not talking about him. I asked if you were wrong." he retorted.

"Yes." I mumbled.

"Then tell him. If he ain't man enough to admit he's wrong, he ain't a man at all. And he certainly doesn't deserve someone like you." he told me seriously. I smiled into my arms.

"Thanks." I said quietly. He wiped my shoulder and patted my back.

"No problem. Go look." he told me. I stood up and walked over to the mirror. I looked at it in the mirror and smiled.

"I love it." I told him. He smiled and taped it up.

"Good. Now do me a couple favors." he started. "One, come back for more. Two, call Jack." he told me. I nodded and gave him a quick hug.

"Thanks again." I said and walked out.

BREAK

I hadn't talked to Emilie for months. I put her aside and focused on my work. I finally quit asking Bobby and Paisley how she was and just asked about them. Ma would try to bring her up but I'd cut her off as nicely as I could. The first seven months I was here was spent on thinking about her and now I needed my mind clear. That meant Lydia too. I kicked her away after that day she tried to seduce me. Troy and James were proud of me but I still felt guilty about bringing her with us. And just because I pushed Emilie to the back of my mind didn't mean I missed her any less.

"Jack-O, hurry up!" Troy yelled from the kitchen. I yawned and walked out my bedroom and stared at the two guys looking at the fridge.

"We need food." James whined. I laughed and opened the cabinets. I frowned when I saw, well I saw nothing.

"I guess we do." I mumbled. They nodded and sat down.

"Lydia kept the fridge full. It's was the only thing that bitch was good at." Troy frowned. James shook his head.

"Nah, I heard she was good at other stuff." he smiled and flicked his tongue over his teeth. I laughed and nodded.

"She was okay." I told them.

"Well, we need food and we need it now." Troy said slamming his fist on the table. I nodded and lit a cigarette.

"Well, I know none of us wanna go so how about we flip for it." I offered. They nodded and I pulled out a coin.

"You and James, then me and the loser." Troy declared. I nodded and flipped the coin.

"Heads!" I called while it flipped. James nodded and we watched it fall. It landed on heads. James huffed and picked it up.

"You and James." I smirked at Troy. They flipped it and Troy called heads. He chose wrong as it landed on tails. I high fived James and grabbed a piece of paper.

"Now I'll write the list." I told him. We gathered a list of food and passed it off on Troy. He grumbled out it but left anyways. James smirked and looked over at me.

"So what do we do now?" he asked. I laughed and shook my head.

"No idea." I said. He thought for a moment and grabbed the game controller. He handed me one and turned the console on.

"It passes the time." he mumbled. We got the game ready and I lit a cigarette.

"So you bummed about not going home for Thanksgiving?" he asked while we were racing.

"A little. I know Ma's going to be upset. I wasn't there last year and I'm MIA again this year." I told him.

"And Bobby's not there." he mumbled trying to get in front of me. I smirked and ran into the side of his car. "Jackass!" he yelled.

"Well, she still has Jerry and his brood." I said. He paused the game and looked over at me.

"And Emilie." he added. I sighed and leaned back.

"Yeah, her too." I mumbled. He shook his head and threw the controller down.

"You're pitiful." he told me. I glared at him and lit another cigarette.

"Am not. She doesn't want to talk to me and I'm thinking about other things besides her." I informed him.

"You do realize that just like love, hate is a two way street." he told me. I nodded and exhaled the smoke.

"Yes, I do. So that means we are on the same page." I mumbled. He smacked the back of my head and I glared at him.

"Admit it." he demanded me.

"Admit what?" I asked getting pissed off.

"That you were wrong." he clarified. I huffed and put out my cigarette.

"Why? She was wrong too." I told him.

"Yes, she was. But so were you. Now admit it." he told me again.

"Fine. I was wrong." I sighed. He continued to stare at me.

"About...?" he trailed off.

"About being an ass and doing everything wrong." I admitted. He rolled his eyes and sat back.

"You are pitiful." he said again. I grunted and sat back into the couch.

At least, I admitted it.

Okay so maybe I was a little dramatic on me doing everything wrong but that's what it seemed like. It was my fault we left on bad terms. I t was my fault she got ticked off. It was my fault for not calling. It's my fault for the demise of that phone call. It's all my fault. And ya know what? Lydia is to blame for all this. That wench ruined everything. She's like a poison that creeps around no matter how hard or long you try to get rid of it. And for some reason she chose me to stick to and terrorize.

BREAK

I walked into the house and smiled when I smelt cookies. I walked into the kitchen and saw Evelyn dancing in the kitchen. She smiled when she saw me and turned the radio off.

"Aww I was enjoying the concert." I teased. She smiled and opened the oven.

"I wasn't expecting anyone. How are you dear?" she asked. I sat down at the table and nodded.

"Pretty good. Just coming by to see how you're doing. I know it's boring not having anyone here." I smiled. She set the try down and smiled.

"It is boring. But oh so very quiet." she said. I laughed and looked at the cookies. My stomach growled and she glared at me.

"Yes, they are peanut butter but no you cannot have any. I'm sending them to Angel." she told me. I pouted and sat back in my seat.

"Well, tell him to send a few back." I joked. She smiled and picked one up.

"Here." she said and handed it to me. I smiled and took it from her.

"Thank you. Angel will love these." I told her. "Have you talked Bobby into coming down for Thanksgiving?" I asked. She sighed and shook her head.

"No, he's busy. He said he'll try to make it down soon though." she said sadly. I made a mental note to call and yell at Bobby when I got home. This would be another near empty holiday. Jack and Angel were gone the first one and now Bobby would be MIA. Just great.

"Yeah, well at least Jerry's staying here. He'd have to fight with Camille to move anywhere." I teased trying to lighten the mood. She smiled and handed me another cookie.

"It's your lucky day." she smiled. "Would you go to the store with me? I need a few more things for dinner." she asked. I nodded and we walked out the door.

We got to the store and I saw Samir and a young boy yelling at one another. Evelyn sighed and got out. I smiled as she walked in and grabbed the boys shoulder. I finally got out and walked inside to see what was going on. I smiled when I heard what she was saying to the boy.

"Okay, Darnell, so the candy just happened to jump into your pocket, huh?" she said waving candy in the boys face. I smirked and walked around the store. "I don't think so. Samir's gonna call the police now." she said to him.

"But I-" Darnell started. She looked at Samir and waved him to call the police.

"Samir, the police." she told him. The boy looked over as Samir dialed.

"Hello, police?" he asked. Darnell looked between them and started begging again.

"Please don't call the police. Please." the boy begs Samir while Evelyn stand behind the boy and waves for him to stop. The boy turns around and Evelyn gets serious again.

'_So this is how she got Bobby under control.' _I thought as I grabbed a box of stuffing.

"I'll hold." Samir said and put the phone to his shoulder.

"That's what happens when you shoplift, there's consequences." Evelyn scolded the boy pointing the candy in his face.

"But it's just some damn candy. I don't wanna go to jail." the boy whined.

"Well, you can probably get away with stealing sometimes, Darnell. But ya know, sooner or later, you're gonna get caught. Is that the way you wanna lead your life, huh?" she asked him. The boy looked down and shook his head.

"No." he mumbled. I smirked and kept looking around.

"I happen to believe that you're worth more. But you gotta believe it, Darnell." she told him.

'She was just like, Abigail.' I thought.

"I hear you, Miss Evelyn." Darnell sighed.

"Are you bullshitting me?" she asked pointing the candy in his face again.

"No, ma'am." he promised. She stood up straight and gave him a firm stare.

"Well, you better not be, you hear me?" she clarified. He nodded and looked up at her.

"Yes, ma'am." he said again. I almost felt bad for the boy but it was too funny.

"Okay. Now you tell Samir." she said turning Darnell toward Samir.

"I won't steal anymore, sir." he recited. Samir sighed and hung up the phone.

"It's all right." Samir told him. Evelyn turned Darnell back to her and smiled.

"Boy, did you get lucky. Now I want you to go straight home, you hear me?" she asked. The boy nodded and fixed his coat.

"Yes." he muttered.

"You shouldn't be out at this time of the night anyway. Go on, get." she said pushing him to the door.

"Thank you, Miss Evelyn." he says and runs out the door. Evelyn smiles and looks at Samir.

"You handled that just beautifully." she told him. I laughed and made my way back to the bathrooms. "You know, he's a good kid. He just needs an older brother." she said. I laughed and locked the door. I could hear her praise him about the birds after I closed it. "So let's take a look at these Thanksgiving birds. Oh, nice. Nice and plump."

I shook my head and pulled up my pants. I heard the doors ding and was about to wash my hands when I heard a man yell.

"Yo, Osama! Osama! Get behind the register! Now!" the man yelled. I froze and listened to what was happening right outside.

"Did you hear what he said?" another man yelled. I froze.

'_Samir's getting robbed.' _I thought. I walked to the door and pushed it open just enough to see out. I saw two men holding Samir at gunpoint. I looked over and saw Evelyn crouching to the ground.

"Move! Move!" the first yelled and jabbed the gun over the counter. Samir rushed to get the drawer out and panicked. I looked back at Evelyn and whispered to her.

"Evelyn." I called. She looked over and put a finger to her lips. She motioned for me to stay put and tried to stay quiet.

"Please! Take it. Please." he cried opening the drawer. The men were getting impatient and yelled at him.

"Shut up, man. Come on." the second man rushed him.

"I want no trouble." Samir cried again and threw the money down. One man reached over and grabbed the money from the drawer and on the counter.

"Shut the fuck up." the man yelled. Samir threw his arms up and cried helplessly as the men robbed him.

"Take it all." he begged.

"Shut up!" the second man yelled as he tried to grab all the money.

"I just came to the country." Samir told them. I felt tears prick my eyes listening to him beg for his life. He moved forward and the men got antsy.

"Don't you move." one man yelled and aimed his gun.

"Do not move!" the other reiterated.

"I want no trouble, sir. Take it all." Samir backed up and pleaded.

"This is America, homeboy. Black people don't get what they want in this country. Why should you?" the first man yelled at him.

"Please!" Samir begged. I saw the first man raise his gun and fire. I jumped and let my tears fall as Samir dropped behind the counter. Evelyn gasped and I saw the men look toward the back. I felt panic rise as they saw Evelyn.

"Please, have mercy." she begged. They raised their guns and she looked past them to me. She gave me one small glance before they each took a shot. My hear dropped as they ran out. I waited for a minute before crawling out the bathroom.

"Evelyn!" I cried over her. I grabbed her hand and squeezed it. "Please, don't do this. Don't leave me!" I cried. I watched her eyes close and I ran over to the phone. I let out a sob as I carefully stepped over Samir's body.

'_No one deserves this.'_ I thought.

"Help me! There's been a shooting." I cried. "Two people are hurt. Hurry!" I cried. I hung up and ran back over to Evelyn.

"Please, stay with me. I can't loose anyone else. Please!" I sobbed. I held her hand and sobbed into her chest.

This couldn't be happening. This had to be a dream. I know I've lost people before but this was ridiculous. Why now? Why me all the time? Her boys aren't even here to see her. Angel was coming back soon and Jack was going to be back one day. Why does it have to be her? I cried the more I thought about it. I had lost another person. Another person that cared, another person that took me in. I tried to tell Jack but he wouldn't listen. You can't let go of something that won't let you go. And my past won't let me go. I loose everyone, but why? And when will it stop?

I guess it's not my lucky day after all...

_When I think back  
On these times  
And the dreams  
We left behind  
I'll be glad 'cause  
I was blessed to get  
To have you in my life  
When I look backOn these days  
I'll look and see your face  
You were right there for me_

In my dreams  
I'll always see you soar  
Above the sky  
In my heart  
There will always be a place  
For you for all my life  
I'll keep a part  
Of you with me  
And everywhere I am  
There you'll be  
And everywhere I am  
There you'll be

Well you showed me  
How it feels  
To feel the sky  
Within my reach  
And I always  
Will remember all  
The strength you  
Gave to me  
Your love made me  
Make it through  
Oh, I owe so much to you  
You were right there for me

In my dreams  
I'll always see you soar  
Above the sky  
In my heart  
There will always be a place  
For you for all my life  
I'll keep a part  
Of you with me  
And everywhere I am  
There you'll be  
And everywhere I am  
There you'll be

'Cause I always saw in you  
My light, my strength  
And I want to thank youNow for all the ways  
You were right there for me  
You were right there for me  
For always

_In my dreams  
I'll always see you soar  
Above the sky  
In my heart  
There will always be a place  
For you for all my life  
I'll keep a part  
Of you with me  
And everywhere I am  
There you'll be  
And everywhere I am  
There you'll be  
There you'll be_

_

* * *

_

There You'll Be by Faith Hill


	10. The Return

_So I know this is soon but chapter 11 flew off my finger tips. Thanks for all the reviews! I'm so happy it's getting more too, BEG75!! HaHa...So I hope you like it. I'm a tab bit nervous adding the movie in...so let me know what ya think!_

* * *

I sat in Jerry's extra room and looked out the window. Everyone was meeting at his house for the gathering after Evelyn's funeral. I didn't go. I couldn't. Jerry and Camille didn't push me either. I had been staying with them since that night and they knew first hand how I had been. The police had gotten there not even five minutes later. And then not even a day later they called it a gang robbery gone out of hand. I didn't believe them. I saw what had done. They called me lucky. Lucky? I watched two innocent people die in front of me and I was lucky? I wasn't sure how that one worked.

Now I was sitting up in Jerry's extra bedroom and looking out the window. I could tell it was cold. Everyone that walked by was breathing out small clouds. I saw the familiar car drive up and park on the corner but couldn't stay long enough to watch who got out.

"Emilie?" Camille asked opening the door. I turned around and smiled at her.

"Hey. I'll be down in a minute." I told her before she could ask.

"Take your time." she smiled and walked back out. I sighed and walked over to the window again. I saw the car was empty and I let the curtain fall back. I walked over to the door and walked out to go see Jerry.

"Diddle." he greeted when I walked downstairs. I smiled and moved into his open arms. He hugged me and kissed my head before I pulled away.

"It's a nice gathering." I said softly trying to strike up a conversation. He smiled and put his hands in his pockets.

"It"ll be okay. He's probably just as nervous as you." he told me. I nodded and walked over to the backdoor. I saw the girls outside and smiled.

"Hey girls." I greeted and kneeled down next to them. They smiled up at me and played with the dolls.

"Hey, Emilie." Daniela smiled. "Are all these people sad?" she asked. Amelia set her doll down to listen to me.

"Yes, they're sad about losing Miss. Evelyn." I told them. Daniela bit her lip and looked away.

"Are they all family?" she asked. I laughed softly.

"No, friends and family." I told her.

"Are you sad?" Amelia asked.

"Emilie!" Camille called. I looked behind me and saw her waving for me to come over. I held up one finger and looked back at Amelia.

"Yes, honey. I'm sad. But in more ways than one." I told her sadly. They nodded and I stood up. I walked over to the door and didn't see Camille. I walked inside and she wasn't there either so I walked into the kitchen to fix me a drink. I walked back out and saw her and Jerry talking and looking out the window.

"Jerry, I thought you said he wasn't coming?" she asked Jerry. I was him sigh and look over at her.

"No, I said I didn't know if eh was coming or not. I haven't seen or talked to him in forever. And you know how hard it is to keep track of Bobby." he told her. She gave him a sideways glance and he sighed again. "Don't give me that look, Camille. I'm way done with that life." he promised.

I knew what he was talking about. Camille had gone on and on about Bobby coming back. They didn't know but I had talked to him regularly. I knew he was coming. But Camille, swore that if he came back he'd jump into Bobby-mode and go all crazy- Her words, not mine. She thought that Bobby would do something stupid and drag Jerry in. He kept telling her that bobby just wanted to come home, pay his respects and see family. But Camille being Camille, didn't believe that. I wasn't sure if I did either though.

"Camille, you needed me?" I asked trying to stop the impending argument between the two. They turned around and Camille gave him one last glance and walked over to me.

"I just wanted to make sure you were okay." she said sweetly. I nodded and looked around.

"So good so far." I told her. She patted my cheek and smiled. I waited until she walked away to walk over to the window. I felt my chest tighten when I saw him outside. I reached for the door but walked away instead. I wasn't ready just yet.

* * *

I couldn't believe it when Jerry called me. I thought he was pulling some kinda sick joke that I would eventually kill him for. But he wasn't. Ma was dead and I was heading back to Detroit on the first flight I could. I was even more shocked when Bobby showed up at the airport as my ride. We only had enough time to go straight to the funeral and that was horrible. We all had our chances to speak and mine turned into a mess. I just couldn't hold it in anymore. What was worse was that Emilie wasn't there. Jerry told me that she had a good excuse but I didn't see what that could be. I asked what happened but he just told me to ask her. Yeah, right.

"Hey. You alright?" Bobby asked walking up behind me on the street. We had just pulled up to Jerry's house and I was a wreck.

"Yeah." I mumbled.

"You sure?" he asked throwing an arm on my shoulders. I inhaled on my cigarette and nodded again. "Ya know I love ya, man." he said. "Come on, let's go see Jerry."

I turned around and saw Jerry outside talking to a group of old ladies and Bobby slowly walking up. I looked up to the second floor and saw a glimpse of someone leaving. My chested got heavy and I took a deep breath. Was I ready for this?

"My mom, she used to talk about ya'll all the time, about how ya'll used to cut up at work." Jerry said to the ladies. I laughed inside. He was always the one to suck up. "She told me everything." he smiled. I stood next to Bobby and waited for the ladies to go inside. When they did we walked up to Jerry.

"How ya doing, baby?!" Jerry smiled hugging Bobby.

"Cool." Bobby laughed. "Nice house, ma. Now bad at all." Bobby said looking at the house.

"What's up kiddo? Come on, man. Give me a hug, man." Jerry laughed pulling me into a hug. I smiled and gave him a hug. He pulled away and looked over at Bobby.

"Now, leave my house alone." he warned. Bobby smiled and looked at him.

"What? You say that like I have trouble with them." Bobby laughed. I leaned on the house and smiled.

"Do you remember when I built that tree house and you burned that shit down?" Jerry asked laughing.

"Come on, ma." Bobby laughed.

"Boy, I wanted to kick your ass." Jerry finished. Bobby tapped the side of the house and smiled.

"Don't worry, your house is brink. I ain't gonna burn it down." he promised.

"Well, now yeah." Jerry smiled. We laughed and walked to the front door. Before we walked in he stopped me. "Oh yeah, yeah no smoking in my house. Put that out. Sorry." he told me. Patting the smoke outta my jacket after I threw the cigarette away.

I shook my head and followed them inside. I looked around and sighed. Jerry had made something of himself, maybe I could do this one day. Maybe I could have all this one day. A nice house, a wife and kids.

I laughed after that thought. Like I'd ever have a semi-normal life. Before I could get that I had to learn how to keep my mouth shut and stop being stupid. I felt a hand come over my shoulder and turned around.

"Let's go see the girls." Bobby said pushing my to the back door. I nodded and started walking over to the door. I opened the door and saw the girls playing in the yard with a tiny dog. We walked over and kneeled in front of them.

"Hey there. You must be Daniela." Bobby said looking at the oldest girl. "Look how big you guys are. And you must be Amelia." he said to the tiny dog the smaller girl was holding. I smirked as he petted the dog. "Nice dress, Amelia."

"I'm Amelia." the smaller girl shouted happily.

"I know. You guys probably don't remember us but I'm your Uncle Bobby and this is Cracker Jack." he told the girls. I sighed and looked over at him.

"Man, don't teach them that." I told him. He huffed and looked back at the girls.

"You're not my uncles. You're white." Daniela said looking at us funny.

"Grandma Evie's white." Amelia spoke up. I smirked and looked at Bobby.

"Yeah. See we're a different kinda uncle. Your grandma, she adopted me and Uncle Jack, like she did your daddy." he explained. They nodded and Amelia pointed to someone behind us.

"You're a policeman." she shouted. Me and Bobby stood up and looked behind us. I saw Green and some other guy walking up.

"That's right, and you're all under arrest, so don't nobody move." Green joked and the girls ran off giggling. "Hey, where ya'll going?" he laughed watching them run off.

"What about me, Green? You gonna arrest me?" Bobby asked taking his tough guy stance. I shoved my hands in my jacket and looked around.

"All depends, Bobby. You keeping straight?" Green asked. Bobby shrugged and tilted his head from side to side.

"Straight-ish." he answered and I smirked.

"How ay doing man?" Green made us for a greeting. Bobby nodded and shook his hand. "Good to see ya." He looked over at me and smiled. "Jack." he nodded.

"Green." I replied. He walked towards me and extended his arm.

"Sorry about your mom, brother. Give me some love." he said. I gave him a quick hug and put my hands back in my jacket.

"Thanks for coming, Green. Mom would have been happy you made it." Bobby thanked him trying to make nice.

"Shit, your mom would've been happy you made it back for her funeral." Green joked. Bobby got serious and stared at him.

"I didn't come back for no funeral." He told Green roughly. The man next to Green snorted and glared at us.

"Thanks for the offer, but we got it under control." he said snottily. Bobby laughed and nodded his head.

"Yeah. Ya know, I can tell by the looks of thing when I drove in. The place looks completely different. Detroit's finest cleaned it up, huh?" Bobby said sarcastically.

"Yeah, be easy, Bobby. We got theses punks. Kid playing basketball across the street witnessed two gang bangers running in there, shooting the place up." Green told us confidently. Bobby laughed again and shook his head.

"Come on, Green. I used to make a good living around here because cops like you guys couldn't find tits in a strip joint." he told them as I laughed. "So why don't you come inside, have some coffee and some doughnuts and then take you boy and get the fuck out of here, okay?" he asked earning another glare from the white guy next to Green.

* * *

I walked off after Bobby ended his insult war with Green and his sidekick. I needed some air. Just get away from all the people and have some time to myself. I really didn't want my return to Detroit to be like this. I wanted to make a nice entrance and maybe talk to Emilie. But I didn't see that anytime soon. I walked to the very back of the house and behind the shed and saw a tiny brunette girl trying to light a cigarette. I smirked and pulled my pack out.

"Need a light?" I asked. I watched her stiffen and slowly turn around. My breath caught when I saw her. It was Emilie.

Now, there were a lot of things running through my head to say to her. One, why are you smoking? Two, why did you dye your hair? Three, was simply a hello. But before I could say anything she took the lighter from my hand and lit up.

"Thanks." she thanked me softly trying to avoid my gaze. "Go ahead and ask me." she said after a minute.

"Uh where do you want me to start? Cause I gotta lot of questions." I said light heartedly. She smiled a little.

"I dyed it about three months ago. I started smoking after you left." she told me and went to take a drag when she pulled it away. "And hello to you too." she finished. I smirked and for a moment thought this would go easy.

"It looks good." I said pointing to her hair. "The brown, goes with her color." She gave me a funny look and smiled.

"What exactly were you doing in LA? Being a rock star or beautician?" she joked. I laughed and shook my head.

"Got jokes, huh?" I muttered. "Smoking is bad." I told her. She flicked the cigarette out my hand and smiled.

"If that's not the pot calling the kettle black." she stated. I pouted for a minute and lit up another.

"It's not if the kettle is silver." I told her. She looked confused for a minute and smiled to the ground.

"So how have you been?" I asked. She licked her lips and smiled.

"Okay." she said softly. I nodded and looked at the sky.

"School?" I asked. She laughed and threw her cigarette away.

"It's good. Weird being in college after being home schooled. But I like it." she told me. I nodded and sat down. I looked up at her and patted the patch of gras next to me.

"You still talking to Paisley?" I asked as she sat down.

"Yeah. She lives just above me." she said. I looked at her and she smiled. "You didn't know?" she asked.

"Know what?" I asked.

"I moved out." she said simply. I nodded and played with my jeans.

"When?" I asked.

"Not too long after you left. Got my own place close to the school. My tuition pays for it." she explained. I nodded and sighed.

"Seems like you did good for yourself." I stated.

"What you think I'd be helpless?" she asked defensively.

"No, I just didn't think you'd move out that quick. Or by yourself, that's all." I said quickly but it was too late.

"Well, I did. And I'm fine. You leaving wasn't the breaking point in my life." she said nastily. I huffed and felt the anger and attitude rise in me.

"Yeah, sure. That's why you've held this grudge over me." I snapped. She stood up and dusted herself off while I did the same.

"Ya know what? You almost had me fooled. Get over yourself. I don't need you nor did I need you. I didn't hold the grudge. You did!" she yelled. I glared at her.

"You wanted me to have fun and be happy. What happened?" I yelled back. She crossed her arms.

"Nothing! I just thought that maybe being happy was without that whore you took with you." she screamed. It hit hard but it was right. Guilt. Yes, it hit me. The guys were right. It was my stupidity in letting Lydia tag along that knocked all the dominos over.

"Jack, I wanted and still want you to be happy. But you shouldn't have blind sided me like that. I looked and felt like an idiot." she cried quietly.

"I know." I whispered. She wiped her face and glared at me. "I'm sorry."

"Well, it's a little too late for sorry." she said trying to stop the tears form falling. "I've cried and I've waited for you to do anything and all I got was nothing."

"I'm sorry. I'm an ass, ok?" I offered. She huffed and glared at me.

"You're more than an ass. And I'm more than done with this." she said and walked off.

_It's too late to say you're sorry  
You've been gone from here too long  
I hope you found what you were missing  
Cause I don't miss you here at all_

_And it's too bad that I'm not crying for you baby,_

_I'm saving my breath  
I'm saving my tears  
I'm saving my life for something  
Better than these years  
I've lost too much time  
Crying over you  
Don't look so surprised that I've  
Got better things to do  
Who's crying now?_

_There's so many nights I wasted  
I was waiting for your call  
Did you think I'd wait forever?  
I guess you don't know me at all_

_And I told you if you left you would regret it  
Thinking I would take you back, but you don't get it_

_There's something you should know  
I finally let you go  
It had to end somehow  
Tell me who's crying now_

* * *

I walked off from Jack and made my way back into the gathering. I was trying to make my way upstairs to get away from everyone but at the very last few feet I was caught. Luckily, I didn't mind you caught me though.

"Diddle!" Bobby yelled and wrapped his arms around my waist. I smiled and turned around to hug him.

"Bobby." I greeted. He pulled away and frowned.

"Your hair..." he stared.

"Is brown." I smiled. "I know."

"Why?" he asked looking at my head. I laughed and pushed him away slightly.

"Because I wanted a change." I told him simply. He looked and me and nodded.

"Ya look good either way." he said. He looked around and then back at me. "Ya seen Jackie yet?" he asked.

"Yeah, just left." I said casually.

"So how'd it go?" he asked.

"Like the last time. He said something stupid, I got pissed and started crying. And I walked off." I told him swallowing the lump in my throat.

"You two gotta get over this. You're both silently blaming yourselves and neither will admit it." he told me firmly. "And now that he is, you're milking it. Stop."

"What do you know!? You've been gone. So keep your nose outta my business." I snapped. He glared at me and I sighed. "Sorry." I mumbled.

"It's alright. We're all stressed. This wasn't the situation for you two to talk. But next time it will be so be nice, please." he pleaded. I nodded and wrapped my arms around his chest.

"I'm tired." I whined. He chuckled and rubbed my back.

"Stay at Ma's with us." he ordered more than asked. I nodded and pulled away.

"Just let me get my bags from upstairs and I'll be ready." I told him and ran upstairs. I opened the spare room and grabbed my overnight bag that I had packed. I threw it over my shoulder and walked back downstairs. I saw Jerry grabbing his keys and smiled.

"Thought you'd be more comfortable riding with me rather Jack." he smiled. I nodded and walked over to his car. I gave one small glance at Jack, who was looking at me. I gave him a sad smile and he nodded. This just wasn't the time to talk for us. Too much was going on. We drove to Evelyn's house in silence and hesitated getting out.

"Nice to be home." Bobby said getting out the car. I looked up at the house and sighed.

"So, shit, Bobby, what've you been up to?' Jack asked as we walked toward the front porch.

"I'm a freaking college professor, Jack. What do you think I've been up to?" he asked Jack. We laughed and made our way up the stairs.

"I doubt that." Jack mumbled and I smirked.

"Same old Bobby." Jerry said shaking his head. Bobby turned to me and winked, then looked at Jack.

"What about you? Ya still sucking a little cock left and right, or what?" he asked. I muffled my laugh with a cough and Jack glared at him.

"Fucker." he mumbled as we walked onto the porch. Bobby went to stick his key in when a voice spoke up in the corner.

"Ya'll ain't right leaving me out here in the cold like this." angel said roughly from the corner. Bobby laughed and walked over.

"Yo, little brother! You asshole! You ought to be ashamed." he yelled grabbing Angel's hand and smiling.

"I missed my plane." Angel smiled embracing his brothers one at a time.

"Get over here. You missed out mother's funeral too, jarhead." Bobby said hugging him. "What's up?"

"What's up with you?" he smiled back. Jerry walked up and hugged him.

"What's up, boy?" Jerry smiled.

"It's all good man." Angel replied smiling at Jack walking up.

"You shaved off the Afro, huh?" Jack laughed. Angel smiled and opened his arms.

"Jack. Haven't seen you in forever." he laughed hugging Jack. Jack pulled back and smiled.

"Yeah, I know." Jack smiled and looked at Angel's face closely. Did you get your teeth whitened?" he asked. We all laughed and angel smacked his arm.

"Man, shut up, Jackie-pooh." Angel laughed. I stood in the back during all the hugs and exchanges but I smiled when I saw Angel looking at me over Jack's shoulder. I started to walk over when he came to me. He wrapped his arms around me and I lost it. I laughed through my tears as he held me tight and rubbed my back.

"Hey, Diddle." he whispered. I pulled back and smiled.

"You're home." I laughed. He patted my head and pulled me to his side.

"Yeah, I made it. Told you I would." he winked. Bobby finally opened the door and we walked into the foyer. We all got silent as we looked around. Jerry walked into the living room and Angel rubbed my arm and spoke up.

"Are ya'll hungry?" Angel asked walking into the kitchen. Bobby shook his head and pointed upstairs.

"No, I'm gonna get some sleep. Jack, you take your old room, all right? Angel, take yours. Diddle, you get yours and I'll take Ma's room." he said and walked upstairs. I nodded and looked over at Jack who was looking back at me. I nodded toward the stairs and he followed. I went to my room and he went to his. I dropped my stuff off and walked to his room. He left it open for me and I walked in.

"I'm sorry about earlier." I apologized sitting on the edge of his bed as he grabbed his guitar. He nodded and strummed the strings. He stopped to get the stuff out to roll a cigarette.

"It's alright. I seem to have a bad time with words as of late." he told me. I bit my lip and nodded. I heard footsteps and saw Bobby appear a few minutes later.

"You been crying in here, ya little fairy? Diddle don't wanna see that." he teased sitting on the floor.

"Leave it alone, man." Jack mumbled rolling his cigarette. I smirked and leaned back against the wall.

"Still making a lot of racket on that freaking thing?" Bobby asked. Jack smirked and looked over at me.

"Yeah, still making a lot of racket." he smiled. "Too weird in Ma's room?" he asked.

"Oh man. Way too weird. It's crazy. I mean, everything's exactly the same. She didn't change nothing in the house." Bobby sighed rubbing his face.

"She didn't want to. Thought it would make you stay a while when ya'll came back." I told them. They nodded and I looked over at Jack.

"Look at ya'll." Jerry said appearing at the doorway. We all looked over and Bobby spoke up.

"What?" he asked.

"Nothing." Jerry smiled shaking his head. "Just happy to see ya, man. Happy to see my brothers, that's all."

"I'm happy to see you too, Jerry." Bobby told him and pointed his thumb over his shoulder at me. "But don't leave Diddle out." he reminded him. I smiled and tapped his head with my foot.

"I'm not. I guess I'll be stopping by the grocery store and grab a turkey or something." he said slowly and looked at me. I felt tears fill my eyes but hid them when Jack gave me a worried look. "Have a Thanksgiving dinner. Let's at least act like we're a real family. Mom would like that." he finished trying to save me from any questioning. We all nodded and saw Angel appear all dressed up behind Jerry.

"Where are you going?" I asked staring at him. He rubbed his head and sighed.

"It's a little heavy in here. I'm gonna just go outside and get some fresh air." he said nervously. We all burst out laughing and looked at him.

"You're full of shit, man. You can smell that ass from down the street, huh?" Bobby asked him laughing. I couldn't stop laughing and covered my mouth to muffle them.

"What are you talking about?" Angel asked Bobby then looked at me. "It's not funny, Emilie." he warned.

"What do you mean, what? Come on, what, man. You know exactly what we're talking about with La Vida Loca." Bobby yelled. Jerry covered a laugh and Jack nearly choked on his smoke.

"Ain't nobody going to get no La Vida Loca nothing." Angel declared glaring at all of us. I shook my head and smirked at him.

"She's got a boyfriend." I informed him. He glared at me for joining in again but I smiled.

"She got a boyfriend. She's got a hard dick in her right now. She's screaming someone else's name, and the last thing she's doing is thinking about your black ass." Bobby yelled laughing. I doubled over onto Jack's bed laughing. He was laughing too, at me and the situation at hand.

"Leave it alone, man. I can't believe ya'll coming at me with this crazy junk, man." Angel grumbled and looked at me. "Especially you, Diddle."

"She's nothing but trouble." Bobby sang.

"I'm standing here now telling ya'll both right now, I'm not going to see that girl, and I'm not!" Angel declared and stalked off. We all let our laughs wear off and fell into a comfortable silence.

"Well, I'm heading out." Jerry said finally. "Em, you wanna come back with me, go home or stay here?" he asked me. I sighed and looked up at him.

"I'll stay here." I told him. He nodded and said his goodbyes before leaving. Bobby left a few minutes later leaving me and Jack alone again. I breathed in and out and tried to not look at him.

"Maybe we should wait." he said. "Ya know, wait to talk. About us and stuff." he added. I nodded and leaned up.

"Yeah. Now's not a good time. Too much stress already." I agreed.

"We'll talk in a few days." he nodded.

"Ya think we can be civil 'till then?" I asked. He looked over at me and shrugged.

"I wanna be. Even if we did talk, I wanna be civil. I don't like fighting with you, Em." he said softly. I nodded and walked over to his door.

"Me neither but sometimes all you can do is yell and get it all out at once. It's bound to happen so why not get it out at once?" I said and opened his door. I looked back at him one more time.

"Night, Em." he whispered.

"G'night, Jack." I whispered back and walked out his room.

I walked over to my room and opened my door. I sighed and flopped down on my bed. I stared at the ceiling and let the real tears fall for the first time that day. I closed my eyes but opened them the instant I saw Evelyn and Samir's bodies. I let out a small sob and covered my mouth. I knew it was going to be a long healing process. I also knew I needed Jack for this but I wasn't sure when I would let that happen.


	11. The Address

_So here it is, I hope you like it. FYI- I got my comp back in my room so updates will be much faster! No one looking over my shoulder in the living room now...lol. So I'm getting a few more reviews on here and I wanna thank you._

_Lysis88 - Thanks! i'm glad you were that into it. I'm glad you liked it! :)_

_BEG75 - As always, thanks. You're way too good! I've said it before, but to me you are one of the best writers, and to have you read my work and like it, it means a lot! So thank you so very much!! :)_

_MissIndependent101 - So far so good on adding in the movie. Thank gosh my chapters are sorta long or I'd have a bunch of chapters...lol. Thanks though!! :)_

_Special2 - A new reviewer, you'll come back, right? HaHa...Thanks though! I'm glad you like it._

* * *

I woke up early the next morning and nearly laughed when I heard the commotion. He lied through his teeth last night and now I was woken up by his and Bobby's bitch fight about well, his bitch. I shook my head and slowly got out of bed. I slipped my pajama bottoms on over my boy shorts and opened my door. I smirked when I saw a disheveled Jack open his door too. He closed his eyes and sighed when eh realized who was fighting.

"You'd think by now Angel would know better than to bring her here." he mumbled running a hand through his messy hair. I smiled and leaned on my door frame.

"Well, you'd think he knew better than to see her at all." I teased. He finally looked at me and smiled.

"Good morning." he said politely.

"Good morning." I gave back and walked past him to the bathroom. I brushed my teeth and fixed my hair before walking back out. I walked towards the stairs and started laughing again. Sofi was leaning over the stair case yelling at Bobby while Angel yelled at Bobby.

"Loco Ono is not staying in this house." Bobby yelled waving his hockey stick around in the living room. I walked past him and sat on the couch to get a better view.

"Bullshit, Bobby!" Angel yelled.

"I don't care! La Vida Loca ain't staying in this house one more night." Bobby yelled while Jerry fell over laughing in the chair.

"Oh so it's your house?" Angel attacked while Bobby smacked the puck around.

"So get her stuff. This ain't no homeless shelter." he yelled again. Angel pointed his finger at Bobby and continued to yell.

"You not running shit, Bobby. You not!" Angel screamed.

"Hey, Bobby!" Sofi yelled from the stairwell. I rolled my eyes hearing her say something inaudible in Spanish. Angel turned around and pointed at her.

"Baby, why don't you go upstairs. I've got this covered." Angel told her. I decided to leave once Bobby retaliated with more jokes and rude comments. I walked past them and out the front door.

"Loud, huh?" Jack's voice said from behind me. I turned around and smiled.

"No kidding. What a wake up call." I joked. He nodded and pulled out a cigarette. I smirked and took it. I grabbed his lighter and lit it while he shook his head.

"Not used to seeing you smoke. What happened to you not wanting black tarry lungs?" he joked at one of my first comments to him. I wanted to stay joking but the first thing that ran through my mind accidentally slipped out.

"Someone I cared about left, so I didn't see the point anymore." I slipped up. I hid my tiny gasp and mentally cursed myself.

"God, Emilie." he sighed rubbing his face. "Why can't this be easy?" he mumbled.

"Because it's not supposed to be." I snapped. He looked over at me and my heart broke.

"What do you want me to do? Tell me." he begged and walked over to kneel in front of me. "Just tell me so I can have you back." he begged. I licked my lips and nodded.

"I cried for days." I began. "I cried for nights and days over you. I wallowed in my own fucking self pity because you took that tramp with you."

"I'm sorry." he interrupted.

"Sorry? It's too late for sorry." I seethed. He stood up and stared at me.

"Then yell at me, scream and hit me. Do whatever you need to do." he said raising his voice. I jumped up and threw my cigarette out. I started to walk past him but he grabbed my arm.

"No! We're doing this now." he hissed pushing me backwards.

"I hate you!" I screamed. He looked hurt but nodded. "You left. You took her. You didn't call, you didn't even try."

"I did call!" he defended.

"7 months later!" I yelled throwing my hands in the air. "And then you have the nerve to tell me that you missed me!" I laughed manically.

"I did!" he said softly. I finally let the tears fall hearing his soft voice.

"Then why didn't you call?" I asked just above a whisper. He walked over and grabbed my face.

"I was stupid. I was stubborn. I didn't want to give in." he pleaded. "I know I was wrong. And I'm sorry. Just please, please tell me what I need to do to get you back."

"I cried for days. I couldn't even smile. I had lost you after losing everyone else. After you said I never would, I did. You hurt me, Jack." I cried looking him in the eyes. "You really hurt me."

"I know, trust me. I know. But I really need you. I really, really need you. Just give me this." he begged. I looked into his eyes and searched for any reason to say no. To tell him to fuck off. But I found nothing. All I found was hurt, pain, guilt and so much more. He needed me and I needed him. Why be selfish?

"Please, Emilie." he begged.

"Okay." I whispered. He swallowed and pulled me into his chest. He kissed the top of my head and I cried. And for once in a long time I felt safe. I had Jack.

_Well I cried out my eyes the night that you left_

_And I begged for a sinner's reprieve_

_And I'll never forget the shame that I felt_

_When you loosened my grip on your sleeve_

_You said baby you didn't do anything wrong_

_There's just something that I have to say_

_And I said I'll never forgive you for this_

_Not even if you say please_

_I wanna hear say please, baby_

_Please, baby_

_I'm stupid, I was wrong_

_And you knew it all along_

_So get down on your knees, baby_

_Swallow up your pride_

_You know it wouldn't hut to cry_

_And say please_

_Oh, baby, please_

_After you left you know it took me a while_

_To get myself off of the ground_

_It was maybe a month before they got me to smile_

_Baby I've never been so downI know you think that I'm just being mean_

_And you're right 'cause I'm still mad at you_

_So if you want back in my graces tonight_

_There's just one thing you gotta do_

_I wanna hear you say please, baby_

_Please, baby_

_I'm stupid, I was wrong_

_And you knew it all along_

_So get down on your knees baby_

_Swallow up your pride_

_You know it wouldn't hurt to cry_

_And say please_

_Let me hear you say please_

_You must have thought I was clay in your hands_

_That I needed the strength of your two legs to stand_

_Well, baby, guess what, I'm standing just fine_

_It turns out that I've got a little steel in my spine_

_I wanna hear you say please, baby_

_Please, baby_

_I'm stupid, I was wrong_

_And you knew it all along_

_So get down on your knees, baby_

_Swallow up your pride_

_You know it wouldn't hurt to cry_

_And say please, baby_

_Please, baby_

_I'm stupid, I was wrong_

_And you knew it all along_

_So get down on your knees, baby_

_Swallow up your pride_

_You know it wouldn't hurt to cry_

_And say please_

_Oh baby please, please_

_Say please_

* * *

So we finally talked. We agreed to put everything in the past. I even told her that Lydia stuck around. She wasn't too happy about that but we let it go. She reminded me I was still on thin ice but we needed each other more than we needed ourselves. That was more important right now. We all spent the majority of that day sitting around and being lazy. Well, not me and Emilie. We were on kitchen duty. And yes, it was Thanksgiving.

"Will they ever grow up?" Emilie asked walking back into the kitchen. I looked into the living room and listened to my brother's start another insult war.

"Try it one more time." Jerry warned from the chair.

"What you gonna do?" Angel urged throwing another yellow tab at him.

"You'll see." Jerry pointed.

"Big ass teeth. Bite me?" Angel teased. Bobby laughed from the couch and looked over at Jerry.

"You do got some big ass teeth, Jer." he laughed. I shook my head and turned back to see Emilie cutting veggies for the salad. I closed the oven and walked up behind her. I placed my hands on either side of her and set my chin on her shoulder.

"What?" she asked.

I blew the hair off her neck and grinned when she shivered. I cleared her neck and placed a small kiss on it. She set the knife down and leaned her head back onto my shoulder and sighed. I gazed at her exposed neck and was about to kiss it again when I heard a loud crash from the living room. I pulled back as Emilie turned around with a worried look. We walked over to the living room and both groaned. Jerry and Angel were brawling on the floor as Bobby bounced on the couch laughing.

"The Gorgeous Black Ladies of Wrestling, Nitro and Midnight." he yelled. "Nitro got Midnight in a headlock. Get him! Get him! Jerry!" he egged Jerry on. "Midnight trying to get up, but Nitro's on him. Get him!" Bobby finished as the two men stopped fighting.

"Men." Emilie huffed and walked back into the kitchen. I smirked and looked back the three grown but obviously immature men in the room.

"It's done." I told them and walked into the kitchen.

Emilie finished setting up the table and everyone gathered around. We all stood and held hands as Bobby said grace.

"Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior, thank you for this day. Thank you for this food we're about to receive and thank you for brining us together. Amen." he recited.

"Amen." The rest of us responded and sat down.

"Pass me the salad, man." Jerry asked. I passed it to him. We started to eat in silence until Jerry spoke up.

"Close your mouth, Angel." he scolded him. "You think you a cow or something?" he finished. Angel scowled at him and slowed down. I slowly looked down at Ma's empty seat and for a minute saw her sitting there.

_'Jackie? I know bad things happened to you before you came to me.'_ she said sweetly and I looked away. _'Hey, look at me. But you're safe now.'_ she whispered and opened her hands. I stared until she disappeared and Emilie took her place.

"Jackie?" she whispered grabbing my hand. I looked at her and smiled sadly.

"I'm okay." I promised.

* * *

Bobby ended up interrupted dinner and getting the guys to go play a game of hockey. I declined to come and stayed home to wash the dishes and clean up. After doing all that and putting more dishes away that Sofi had left in Angel's room I decided to take a shower. I walked into the bathroom and turned the shower on and slowly watched the room fill with steam. I stripped off my clothes and stepped in, instantly sighing at the water hitting my skin. It felt good to let it all go, with Jack I mean. We had agreed we were both at fault and put it all behind us. To much was going on for us to keep up this grudge. His mother just died, he needed me. And I watched her die, I needed him. Sure, I had Paisley but she wasn't Jack. And there was a lot he didn't know.

"Emilie?" Jack's voice flowed through the door. I snapped out of thought and nearly shrieked when I realized the water was cold. I jumped out of the shower and wrapped a towel around my body. I opened the door and looked at Jack. He smirked and leaned on the frame.

"Yes?" I asked cocking my head.

"Making sure you didn't hurt yourself." he smiled.

"Yep, I'm fine." I smiled back. He looked in the bathroom.

"Water get cold?" he asked.

"Oh yes." I laughed and shut the door. I heard him laugh and walk away as I dried myself off and got dressed. I was shivering as I walked over to his room and jumped next to him on his bed. I climbed under the covers and scooted over to him.

"I lost track of time after I washed my hair." I whispered through chattering teeth. He chuckled and wrapped his arm around me to tuck me under his arm. I laid my head on his shoulder and closed my eyes.

"Ya tired?" he asked softly. I nodded and let out a tiny yawn. "Go to sleep." he whispered and kissed my head. I nodded again and slowly drifted off into a sound sleep.

_I walked through the dark store and looked around. It was eerily quiet and empty. I walked through the aisles and looked for anything or anyone. I passed the counter and gasped looking down. _

_Samir. _

_'Help me, Emilie.' he gasped . I covered my mouth and stumbled back into a rack of chips. I turned around to run out and slipped on something. I fell to the ground and groaned as I sat up. I looked at my hands and started to shake. _

_'Blood.' I mumbled. My eyes looked at the ground and slowly looked towards the end of the room. I let out a sob as I saw her there. _

_'Evelyn.' I cried and crawled over to her. I picked her head up and set it in my lap. I rubbed her forehead as I cried and looked around. _

_'Help! Somebody help me!' I screamed. 'No, don't go. No!' I sobbed into her hair. _

_'Emilie!' someone yelled. I continued to sob as the voice got louder._

"No!" I screamed. I felt two arms go around me and another pair shaking me. I opened my eyes and looked straight into Jack's. I let out a so and fell against him.

"Shhh." he whispered in my ear. "It's okay. It was just a dream." he assured me. I cracked my eyes open over his shoulder and saw a pitiful looking Angel holding his head in Jack's chair. I felt, what I assumed was Bobby's hand, rubbing my back and moving the hair out my face.

"It was so real." I choked out. I tried to sit up but Jack held me to him.

"Stay still. Calm down, first." he whispered. I nodded and tried to calm down. After a few minutes my cries stopped and he slowly let me sit up by myself. I looked at the three men in front of me and looked down at my hands.

"I'm sorry." I whispered wiping my face. Jack shook his head and made me look at him.

"It's okay." he assured me. "But are you?" he asked. I sighed and looked around.

"I was there." I started. They looked at me.

"In the dream?" Bobby asked. I tilted my head and nodded.

"In the dream and when it happened." I confessed. Angel shot his head up and moved closer.

"You were in the store?" he asked. I nodded and held back the next flow of tears.

"I came over that day to talk to her and she asked me to go to the store with her. I was in the bathroom when they men stormed in. Evelyn told me to stay put before they found her." I said letting a few stray tears fall. Jack pulled me to him again and kissed my head.

"Is that what Jerry didn't want to tell us?" he asked quietly.

"Yeah. He wouldn't even talk to me about it. I called the police and they came. They found me and asked who to call." I recanted that night and looked at them. "He was the only one here." I whispered. I saw all three men drop their heads in shame at my last sentence.

"I'm so sorry." Jack apologized. I shook my head.

"You didn't know this would happen, okay? Don't be sorry." I told him. I leaned against him and sighed.

"You wanna go to sleep again?" Jack asked. I closed my eyes and sighed again.

"I'll try." I whispered. I heard Angel and Bobby leave the room. I didn't realize it before but Jack was in the same spot he was in when I fell asleep.

"Did you sleep too?" I asked still closing my eyes. He chuck led and shook his head.

"No, I watched you sleep." he told me. I smirked and looked up at him.

"That's creepy." I informed him. He smirked at me.

"Yeah, but it was worth it. I had forgotten how cute you were when you were sleeping." he whispered running a finger down my jaw.

"Well, maybe you won't have to forget again." I whispered. His stare was so strong and caring it was almost scary.

"I won't. I can promise you that." he vowed kissing my nose. I closed my eyes and laid down to fall asleep and wished that he was right.

* * *

I slept until the next morning and was still tired when Jack woke me up. I smiled when I saw that we were still in the same spot.

"Ya know you didn't have to stay." I told him. He smiled and kissed my forehead gently.

"I wanted to. I haven't been near you in forever, I have a lot of time to make up." he winked. I blushed and got out of his bed and arms. I stretched my arms up and felt Jack slip his hands around my waist and pulled me down onto his lap. I let my back relax on his chest as he kissed my shoulder. Suddenly, he stopped.

"What the fuck is that?" he asked ripping the back of my shirt down. I peered over my shoulder and smirked.

"A tattoo." I replied simply. He kept looking at it and traced a finger over it.0 D

"When did you get it?" he asked.

"A few days before Evelyn..." I stopped. He took his eyes off the tattoo and rested his chin on my shoulder.

"I like it." he whispered. I smirked and turned to look at him.

"Really?" I asked. He nodded and kissed my jaw.

"Yeah, I like girls with tattoos." he winked. I laughed and stood up.

"You're a guy, you like girls period!" I declared and walked out of his room. I was about to walk over to mine when I spotted Angel's door cracked. I bit my lip and cautiously made my way to his room. I hadn't gotten anytime with him since Sofi had come back into the picture and I hated it.

"Ang?" I called slowly pushing his door open. I peeked in and saw him looking over. He smiled and waved me in when he was it was me.

"Hey Diddle." he greeted softly. I sat next to him on the bed and laid my head on his shoulder.

"How are you?" I asked. He sighed and played with his hands.

"Okay." he replied. I lifted my head and looked at him. "It's just weird. Ya know?"

"Trust me, I know." I smiled softly. He nodded and sighed again.

"I'm sorry, we haven't had the chance to talk. Sofi's kinda clingy." he laughed.

"Yeah, I noticed." I laughed with him. He looked over at me and lifted his arm to hug me.

" I missed you." he whispered into my ear and held me tight. "It made my day to get your letters." I felt tears fill my eyes and looked over into the corner chair.

"My jacket." I giggled. He looked over and smiled.

"Yeah, I still got it. One guy tried to take it and I hit him. He thought I was crazy fighting over some jacket." he laughed. "But it's more than that."

"I'm glad your home, Angel." I told him sincerely.

"Me too, Em. Me too." he said and patted my leg. I heard the door creak open and saw Sofi walk in. She gave me a glare and I rolled my eyes.

"I'll see you later, Angel." I said and hugged him one last time.

I walked past Sofi nudging her with my arm and walked into my room. I opened my bag and looked for clothes but found none clean. I sighed and packed my things up. I needed to go home now. I walked over to Jack's room and he wasn't there so I walked downstairs. I saw the guys walking to the door and I called after them.

"Where you going?" I asked. Bobby looked up and smirked.

"You're coming to." he told me. I gave them a confused look and walked out with them.

"Okay, so where are we going?" I asked.

"Ma's lawyer called. We have to go meet him to get her safety deposit box and stuff. He said there was stuff in there for you too." Angel spoke up. I nodded and slowed down.

"Well, can you drive by my apartment? I need to drop my bags off and change." I asked.

"Yeah, just tell me where it is." Bobby said getting into the car. I slid in beside Jack in the backseat and gave Bobby the directions.

"This is where you live?" Jack asked looking at the nice building.

"Yep. Wanna come up?" I asked the guys. They nodded and got out the car. I walked into the building and up a few floors.

"How do you afford this?" Bobby asked.

"It's in my tuition. It's all college students. A few old people and young couples but mostly students." I told them. "I pay rent just not each month." I explained. They nodded and I stopped at my door. "Paisley lives directly above me. We bang on my roof/her floor to get each other's attention." I laughed.

I pushed the door open and let them in. They walked around and nodded. It was a nice place. It had a nice sized living room when you first walk in. You took a left and there was the kitchen which was very modernized and energy efficient. Yes, even Detroit tries to save the world. To the right leading away from the living room in a tiny hallway with two bedrooms and a bathroom.

"You like living here?" Angel asked.

"Yeah, it's nice." I smiled. "Have a seat, make yourselves at home. I gotta put these in the wash and get changed." I told them and walked off to my bedroom. I walked to my closet and pulled out a pair of grey slack and a white blouse. We're going to see a lawyer so at least one of us should look presentable.

"You staying here now?" Jack asked walking in my room.

"I do live here." I smiled but it quickly faded when I saw his frown.

"I just figured you'd stay at the house for a bit." he mumbled. I smirked and walked over to him. I stood between his legs and played with his necklace.

"Ya know you could always stay here." I offered shyly. He smirked at me and played with the hem of my shirt, lightly touching my stomach.

"All you had to do was ask." he whispered. I smiled and rested my forehead on his.

"Get out." I ordered playfully. He pouted and looked at my clothes behind him.

"Why can't I see the show?" he asked. I smiled and moved away from him.

"Because you just can't. Now go." I demanded again. He kept pouting as he stalked out the room. I quickly got dressed and threw my dirty clothes in the washer. I walked back out to the men and smiled.

"Ready?" I asked. They nodded and we headed out for the lawyer's office.

* * *

"Gentlemen, I am truly sorry about your mother. Although I only met Evelyn the one time she made quite an impression. I know it's difficult to deal with mundane financial matters while your heart still grieves for a loved one." Mr. Bradford said while we sat in front of him. Jack was flipping through papers and looked up at him.

"How much do we get?" Jack asked. Bobby slapped the back of his head in an instant and my hand was right behind his.

"Come on, man." Jerry muttered.

"Excuse me." Mr. Bradford whispered getting up and walking away.

"Jack, what the?" Angel started.

"Stupid-ass Jack, what's wrong with you?" Bobby scolded taking the papers away from him.

"What was that?" I asked glaring at him. He shrugged and folded his hands. I wanted to feel bad for him but that wasn't too bright.

"This is the contents of your mother's safety-deposit box." He said setting a box in front of us. "I'll leave you to look through it." he said and walked out. Bobby opened it up and started passing papers around. He handed one to Jack and Jerry.

"Birth certificate." Jack mumbled opening it up. "The adoption papers." he finished after reading it.

"Henry Ford Hospital. So I am from Detroit." Jerry smiled looking at his papers. Bobby kept searching through the box as Angel looked on.

"Lansing, Michigan." Jack mumbled. I reached for his leg under the table and gave his knee a reassuring squeeze.

"My mom was 16?" Jerry asked surprised then shook his head.

"I got any papers in there?" Angel asked looking over Bobby's shoulder.

"No." Bobby said shaking his head. My hear ached for him and he tried again.

"I don't?" he asked sadly.

"No." Bobby said regretfully.

"You got any papers in there?" Angel asked him. I looked to him as he shook his head.

"No." he replied. Jack reached into the box and grabbed a set of tickets.

"Whoa, 1969. Mom went to Woodstock." he read. Jerry grinned and nodded.

"You didn't know Mom was a hippie?" Bobby asked chuckling. I smirked and laughed at the thought of Evelyn wearing flowers and tye-dye.

"Oh, here we go." Bobby mumbled and pulled out a wad of cash.

"I ain't got no papers in there, man?" Angel asked again as Bobby counted the money.

"There's some paper right there." Bobby replied handing him a few bills. Then some to Jerry and pocketing the rest.

"What about me?" Jack asked. Bobby reached into the box and pulled out a rosary and dropped it in Jack's hand. I smirked and shook my head.

"That'll look good on you." He told him.

"Whatever, man. You're fucking with me." Jack muttered.

"Quit crying." Bobby told him. He sifted through the box one last time and shut it.

"I thought you said he had something for me?" I asked. Bobby opened it up and looked confused. Mr. Bradford walked in after that with a manila envelope.

"I forgot to give you this." He said holding it out to me. "I presume you are Miss. Ravin." he smiled. I took the envelope from him and sat back down, the boys were right behind me. I opened it up and poured out the contents. There were a few pictures and a few documents. Jack picked up one and held it out to me.

"Is that you?" he asked. I grabbed the picture and froze. It was the last picture we took before my parents died. Me and Richie were dressed for the play. I felt a tear trickle down.

"Yeah." I chocked out.

"Are those your parents?" Jerry asked.

"Yeah and my brother. Not my real ones but close enough. That was the night they died." I told them smiling. I laid it down and looked through a few more. They laughed at a baby bathtub picture of me when I was two. I finally picked up the documents.

"What's that?" Angel asked.

"The adoption papers when my mom and dad got me and my birth certificate." I told them. I opened the adoption papers and piece of paper fell out. I picked it up and looked at it.

"Looks new. It's not old like the other papers." Bobby commented. I opened it up and read it.

"14232 Rolland Dr. Salem, Mass." I read. Mr. Bradford cleared his throat and looked at me.

"She recently brought that in. Maybe a week before she passed. I 'm not sure what it was for but she was really excited about it." he smiled. "Wanted it to be a surprise for you." I smiled sadly at him and folded it back up. I looked over at Jack with teary eyes.

"Can we go now?" I whispered. He nodded and we stood up again.


	12. First Time's

_Thanks for all the reviews! I'm getting more and I love it! Thanks BEG75, SexySadie88, Special2, MissIndependent101, lemmonpie! I'm so happy you all liked it. Next chapter I'll answer them better but it's laste...lol! Enjoy!!_

* * *

I wasn't sure what to think about the time at the lawyer's office. I killed me to see Angel so hurt when Bobby told him he didn't have any papers. Bobby didn't have any either but he didn't show anything, of course. I tried to block the whole visit out but my mind and hand kept drifting to the tiny slip of paper in my pocket. I wasn't sure what it was or why Evelyn was holding it but it had to be big.

We left the lawyer's office and Jerry announced he wanted to show us something. I knew what he wanted to show us but I hadn't seen it yet.

"This is it." Jerry said walking inside a huge old building. I looked around at the beat down warehouse as we all walked up the cement hill.

"So this is your dream, Jerry?" Bobby asked looking around like me.

"Oh, yeah." Jerry confirmed proudly.

"There's a lot of space in here. What are you gonna do build some automobiles?" Bobby asked.

"No, luxury lofts." Jerry told him.

"Rims, man." Angel muttered. I snickered and kept walking, holding onto Jack's hand.

"Urban sophistication is what I'm talking about." Jerry told him. I heard Jack stiffle a laugh and I smacked his hip.

"So now you're doing real estate?" Angel laughed.

"This whole first floor here is gonna be lavish offices and storefronts. I'm gonna put stained-glass windows here." Jerry explained as we neared the second floor.

"The building is condemned. You got insurance?" Bobby asked as we stood around the floor looking. It was kinda hard to picture it as something nice.

"Why?" Jerry asked. I held back a laugh, I knew what Bobby was going to say.

"So we can burn this bitch down." Bobby exclaimed. I laughed and Jerry scowled. I felt Jack leave my side but kept looking between Bobby and Jerry.

"No, we ain't burning shit down. You always wanna destroy something." Jerry sighed.

"Look. Look at your little brother." Bobby said pointed behind me. I turned around and gaped at Jack. He was peeing in the building, drinking a beer too.

"Jack!" Me and Jerry both yelled. Jerry more aggravated and me embarrassed.

"Oh, I'm sorry. Is this the master suite? Am I making the property value go down?" Jack laughed looking over his shoulder. I shook my head and turned back to the guys, who were laughing at him.

"This shit hole gives the term ''Motor City Breakdown'' a whole new meaning, Jerry. How the hell you gonna pay for all this?" Bobby asked after Jack fixed himself and joined us again. He stood next to me smirking and I hit him in the stomach.

"What?" he pouted rubbing his sore tummy.

"Freak." I mumbled and turned back to Jerry.

"Government redevelopment loan. Easy to qualify. Low interest rates. Ya'll stick around, I might give ya'll ass a job." Jerry told them. All of a sudden Angel burst into laughter. We all turned around to see him looking at something on a shelf.

"They look like nipples." Angel told us pointing to the incriminating object. I rolled my eyes and turned away. What is it with these boys?

"Let's go get a real drink." Bobby said throwing his beer bottle on the floor.

* * *

Bobby drove to the local bar he always went to and parked. I had been here a few times with Paisley to play pool. At first, I was scared but they knew I had some kind of affiliation with Bobby so no one touched or looked. We all took our seats at the bar and Johnny, the bartender, came over.

"What will it be guys?" he asked looking at the boys and giving me a small smile.

"The usual." Bobby told him. Johnny nodded and pulled four shot glasses out and set them in front of the guys. He grabbed the bottle of whiskey and poured each glass. He looked over at me and handed me a tall glass and a coke.

"Thanks, Jon." I smiled. He nodded and took another glass for himself.

"Your attention, please. I wanna make a toast. To Evelyn Mercer. The greatest mother four degenerate bastards ever had." Bobby toasted raising his glass. We all raised our glasses and the guys took their shots while I sipped my coke. Sometimes being underage sucked but Johnny had been known to slip a little rum in my coke when no one was looking.

"Johnny, pour me and my brothers another round. And a warm milk for my sister here." Bobby said slamming his glass down. I hit his arm for that comment and he smirked. "I wasn't talking about you. I was talking about Jack." he told me. I laughed and Jack glared at him.

"Man, I will drink you under the table." Jack told him, slurring ever so slightly.

"We're not talking about sperm, Jack, this is whiskey." Bobby told him. I hit his arm again and Jack sighed. We took the drinks Johnny poured and walked to find a table.

"_Jack drinks Jack, Jack drinks Jack_." Jack sang while sipping his drink. I was trying hard not to laugh but it was getting hard. Angel was glaring trying to ignore him and Jerry was just as amused as I was.

"That's your brother." Jerry said to Bobby pointing a finger at Jack. I laughed and Jerry looked at me. "And your boyfriend, when ya'll play nice." he teased. I glared at him and leaned back in my seat.

"_Jack drinks Jack,_ Jack." Jack sang but got cut short.

"Licks ass crack and ball sack." Bobby shot getting tired of the singing. I shook my head and laid it on the table.

'_Here we go, again._' I thought, knowing the banter that was about to happen.

"Jack doesn't lick ass crack and ball sack! Jack likes boobs. Jacks got fans. Jack's got lots of fans." he slurred back at Bobby. Jerry shook his head and looked over at me.

"Oh man." Jerry sighed. "Are you proud?" he teased. I smirked and pinched his arm.

"Will you shut up, man?" Angel groaned looking at Jack. Jack gave him a drunken smirk and sat back.

I decided to break the small line of silence and go to the ladies room. I walked to the back of the bar and pushed into the ladies room. I had to give it to Johnny. He kept the place clean. He made sure everything was clean so people would come back. Yes, it was a bar but it was also a public place. He knew how to take care of his business. And you don't see that a lot in Detroit. I was washing my hands when I thought back to the paper in my pocket. I pulled it out after drying my hands and looked at it.

"14232 Rolland Dr." I muttered. I looked at it and thought. "Who did you know in Salem?" I wondered. I sighed and put it away.

"I don't wanna go. But I have to." I heard Jerry mumbling as I walked back over to the table.

"Why are you in such a rush? You can't hang with your big brother and have a drink?" Bobby asked.

"I'm here. I mean, what? I'm glad y'all here. I love y'all." Jerry said looking at everyone. I sat down and looked over at Jack. He gave me a weary look and leaned over to me.

"You okay?" he asked. I smiled and kissed his cheek softly.

"I'm fine." I whispered. He smiled and grabbed my hand under the table.

"Hey, that's real goddamn bad stuff about your mom, fellas." Johnny G said walking up to the table.

"Yeah." Was the reply from all of us.

"Freaking gangs. Worms. Someone ought to step on them." Johnny said shaking his head. My head shot up and looked at him. Bobby's did the same.

"Which gang, Johnny G?" Bobby asked curiously.

"Oh, shit. Here we go. l knew it." Jerry said shaking his head. I sat back and tensed a little. This is what Camille, and I, was afraid of.

"I think I heard something. The neighborhood's really upset about this." Johnny told us while Jerry shook his head.

"Same old Bobby. Mama always said, _'As bright as Bobby is, he just does not like to think._' Ain't no good gonna come from this. Let the police do their damn job." Jerry said sipping his drink.

"Stop with the police. Half the cops in this town are crooked. You think the other half give two shits about another liquor-store holdup?" Bobby told him getting aggravated. To Bobby, the police were nothing more special than they were.

"I'm telling you, man, Green's on our side on this one." Jerry told them, looking at me for support. I sunk back and stayed out of it. This really wasn't the conversation I wanted to have. I knew how they were, and it wasn't going good.

"Come on, man." Jerry sighed setting his glass down.

"Green?" Jack huffed. This took me by surprise. I dropped his hand and started to get up when he grabbed it and pulled me down. He gave me a sympathetic look saying he'd hush.

"She's the only woman that ever gave a damn, man. The least we can do is go bang on a few doors and see what happens. We owe her that much." Angel said to Jerry.

"Why are you acting like such a bitch, Jerry?" Bobby asked. Jerry glared at him and looked around.

"Okay. So, what y'all just gonna shoot up the whole town because y'all mad?" Jerry asked.

"Why not?" Angel growled. I looked at him with wide eyes.

"Angel." I exclaimed. Jack squeezed my hand and I hushed this time.

"Come on, man! The people who did this, they probably from the same shitty-ass streets we from. Mom would've been the first to forgive them. Y'all know that." Jerry told them, proving a good point in my opinion.

"We can't all be saints, Jerry." Bobby seethed sipping his drink. I rolled my eyes and sat back.

"Yeah, we can't all be saints, Jerry." Jack mimicked.

"All right. All right. Cool." Jerry said standing up. I followed suit and Jack jumped up.

"Where you going?" he asked. I tried to force the tears back and looked at him.

"I don't wanna hear this." I told him. I saw Angel and Bobby look over, I knew they heard me.

"I'll take her home." Jerry told us.

"Bye, Jerry." Bobby said and then looked at me. "Sorry, Diddle." he whispered. I hugged him and Angel and turned to Jack.

"Be careful." I whispered hugging him. He nodded and let me go. I walked next to Jerry as he said his final bid to the boys.

"Don't call me when y'all get shot up. This is Detroit, in case y'all forgot." he reminded them and we left. I heard Bobby and Angel ask Johnny about what he had heard and gave one last look to Jack as we left.

"I'm sorry about them. They don't think right, they don't think at all." Jerry apologized as we got into the car.

"I know. But I understand a little too. I just wish it didn't involve violence of any kind." I sighed and looked out the window.

"I know, I do too. But they won't do anything out of hand." he tried to promise. I looked over and smiled. He laughed and kept driving.

He dropped me off at my place after walking me up to be safe. He had a habit of doing that but I didn't mind. I plugged my cell in incase Jack or the police called. I had a habit of leaving it unplugged and it dying on me. I sat on the couch and turned the television to pass the time. It wasn't long before I fell asleep with nothing but worry on my mind.

* * *

"You got a burner?" Bobby asked

"I flew in." Angel told him as Booby looked through the trunk.

"Man, be careful with my baby." he said wiping off 'his baby.'

"Ohh…" Angel smiled.

"You like that?" Bobby asked looking over at him.

"Got ammo?" Angel asked inspecting it.

"Yeah. It's loaded, little brother." Bobby told him hurriedly. "Careful. Here, you carry the gas can." he said handing me the big red gas can.

"We're gonna do that gas thing?" I asked. He

"Yeah, we're gonna do the gas thing." he mimicked in a fake voice. "The only thing that scares people more than getting burned to death is people getting eaten alive. Let's go." he said closing the trunk.

"What do I--?" I asked holding the trunk open. "What do I get?"

"You coming with us?" he teased and looked in the trunk again. "Here you go, sweetheart. Poke them with that." he said handing my a tire iron.

"Oh, thanks." I said sarcastically.

"You're welcome." he mumbled and closed the trunk. We walked up to the door of the building and looked around.

"Let's go." he whispered and kicked the door open. "5-0! I wanna see some hands!" he yelled walking into the door. He had his gun up and so did Angel. Kids wee scattered every where and one started yelling, he had to be the watvh out guy.

"5-0, man! 5-0!" he yelled.

"It's the fucking police!" Bobby yelled as we walked through the crowded hallway. "Get out!"

"I don't wanna see any of you back!" Angel yelled at them running by.

"What are you doing here?" Bobby screamed. I hid my laughter seeing the scared faces.

"Hands!" Angel threatened.

"You got any drugs or alcohol on you?" Bobby asked them as they ran past.

"We're gonna make y'all take urine samples!" Angel finished.

"Get out of here! Get your little asses home now!" he yelled. "The popos is here! Y'all better run, man, these white cops are crazy! They killed Cornbread. He didn't do nothing." he yelled. I hid my laughter.

'_Only Bobby_.' I thought.

"Everybody put your fucking hands up!" Angel yelled.

"Detroit Police! I wanna see your fucking hands in the air!" Bobby yelled again.

"We got the building surrounded!" Angel screamed.

_'I wonder how long until these kids realize we're not cops?'_ I thought.

"Every last one of you!" Bobby yelled.

"Sit your motherfucking ass down!" Angel said pointing the gun at one kid.

"Fuck you." He yelled.

"Sit the fuck down." Bobby yelled. "Don't fucking move!" he yelled to another kid.

"Sit down!" Angel yelled again. We turned into a room and Bobby stuck his gun out at one kid.

"You. Over here." he said holding the gun to the kids neck and pushing him back. "Yeah, yeah, you. You the man, right?" he asked the kid as he fell into the chair. "Sit down and shut the fuck up! Give me the gas." he ordered me. He handed me his gun and I handed him the gas can.

"Yo, what the hell y'all want? Y'all ain't no cops. What the hell you doing here?" the kid yelled as Bobby poured some gas on him.

"You're gonna wish l was the police when I'm done with your ass." Bobby told him and handed the gas can to Angel. The kid try to talk again but Bobby stopped him.

"No, no, no, no, no." Bobby yelled shoving a rag in his mouth. "This is not the talking part, okay? This is the listening part, so shut your mouth."

'What the hell are you standing up for?" Angel asked one girl.

"You know who I am?" Bobby asked the kid. I wasn't sure who to watch, Bobby and the kid or Angel and the girl.

"It's warm here." the girl smarted off to him.

"No?" the kid answered Bobby.

"Get your corn muffin head over there on the couch." Angel yelled. I smirked from behind the chair and lit a cigarette.

"You don't know why we're here?" Bobby asked him.

"Move, move." Angel rushed the girl to the sofa and poured gas on her feet.

"Yo, what the fuck!" she screamed.

"Shut up." he yelled and walked back over.

"I know you're not gonna tell me what I wanna know, so I'm gonna light your little bitch ass on fire." Bobby told him, taking the cigarette from me, and turned around to point at the room. "Then I'm gonna watch you run around here like a chicken with his head cut off, lighting all your little friends on fire. Is that what you want?" he asked.

"Which one of your boys shot up the liquor store on 104th Street?" Angel demanded.

"What boys man?" the kid asked through the rag.

"The police got witnesses, bra." Angel yelled. 'Don't even hit us with no bullshit. Okay, tough guy." The kid yelled through the rag and Bobby yelled back.

"Hey! Now is the talking part. You better start saying what the fuck I wanna hear. Speak." Bobby said taking the rag out of the kids mouth. We all waited intently for what was possibly bound to be the best and worst news we've heard.

"Man, that shit was counterfeit as a motherfucker, man. Ain't nobody playing no basketball when that shit went down, okay? Why you think cops ain't arrest nobody?" he yelled at Bobby. Bobby reached back and punched the kid in the jaw.

"What the hell is he doing?" the girl asked from the sofa.

"How do you know nobody was playing basketball if you weren't there?" Bobby asked.

"Because, bitch, police said those people wasn't killed till 11." the kid yelled.

"So what?" Bobby asked

"So they turn the court lights out at 10!" the kid told us. We all looked at each other and Bobby looked at his watch.

"Let's go. Let's go." Bobby said grabbing the kid by the back of his shirt.

"Now, where we going, man? Where the fuck y'all taking me?" he asked as Bobbu drug him out the room.

"You little bastards need to stay in school." Bobby told the remaining kids on the room.

"That's what you get for calling my brother a bitch." Angel said smacking the kid with his gun.

"I hope you all have a very nice evening." I smiled as we walked out. We drove to the court and stood outside of the gates.

"It's 10:02 and these fucking lights are still on." Bobby said tapping his watch.

"I know you know who did this, homeboy." Angel whispered harshly to the kid.

"This is bullshit. Let's pop this motherfucker right now." Bobby yelled. Angel smirked and I tensed.

"Speak up on it, man." Angel whispered again.

"Bobby, take it easy." I asked.

"Shut up, Jack." Bobby yelled walking to the kid. "Come on."

"Look, what--?" the kid started. "Yo, man, they gonna shut off! They gonna shut off, man!"

"Only lights that are going off are yours." Bobby told him. "Let's go."

"Look, look, look. Look." the kid yelled pointing behind us. We all turned to see the lights turn off.

"You're fucking lucky." Bobby told him.

"Told you. Man, y'all fools been played." he yelled and shrugged Angel off. "Get off of me, man! Y'all don't even know who you messing with, man. Questioning me about the lights being off and all that." he yelled laughing.

"Why don't you shut the fuck up, man?" Angel said hitting him again. "You talk too much." he yelled. I looked over at Bobby who was looking at the court. This was not going to be good. We let the kid go and drove in silence back to the house. We got out to see Sofi waiting for Angel at the door.

"Jack, it was a questionable kill." Bobby said walking into the foyer.

"What makes you think that?" I asked taking my jacket off.

"Boy, it's sad, you growing up without a father. Nobody taught you anything, did they? I should've stayed around longer and held your little hand, huh, sweetheart?" He teased as Angel and Sofi ran past us upstairs.

"Whatever, man." I mumbled and hung my jacket up.

"Look, sometimes pros will cover up their shots with another crime. Like a burglary or something. Then pay a witness to throw the cops on to the wrong suspect. You understand?" he explained walking into the kitchen.

"Why would anybody wanna kill the sweetest woman in the goddamn world?" I asked him. He sighed and lowered his head.

"I don't know, Jackie. I don't know."

* * *

I was half asleep and barely listening to the radio when I felt something on my leg. I kicked my leg and moved it under the blanket. I felt it on my arm and jumped to see Jack.

"Jesus, Mary and Joseph, Jack! You scared the crap outta me." I shrieked putting a hand over my heart. He didn't look up as he responded.

"Sorry." he said solemnly. The tone of his voice struck me like a truck.

"What's wrong?" I asked moving so he could sit next to me on the couch. He put his head in his hands and sighed. He stayed silent for a few minutes and looked up at me.

"I don't wanna talk about it." he whispered and pulled me onto his lap. "I just wanna feel you. Be near you." he said placing a feathery kiss on my neck.

I shivered against his lips and let out a soft sigh of pleasure. His strong hands ran up the back of my shirt and ran across my skin. I locked eyes with him before I pressed my lips to his. I slid my hands around his neck and up the side of his face. An electric shock surged through my blood when our tongues met. I kissed him as deeply as I could and he returned the feeling. All the passion and the desire coursed through me as I pulled back and looked into his eyes. In one soft, gentle move he lifted us off the couch. I wrapped my legs securely around his waist as he carried us back to my room.

The cool air left my back as he laid my on my bed. He didn't even move from his spot on me as he slipped his shirt off. My hands roamed his chest and mesmerized every tattoo and curve of his muscles. He grabbed my hand and intertwined our fingers. He slowly moved them up above my head as he leaned down to kiss me again. His tongue slid ever so slowly across my bottom lip and his teeth gently bit down. I shifted underneath him and he leaned up to look at me. He let my fingers go and moved his fingers down my arms and sides, causing my to shiver. His hands stopped at my shirt and lifted it up and over my head.

He sat up on his knees between my legs and pulled my waist. I wrapped my arms around his neck when I was on his lap again. I curled his hair around my fingers and tilted his head back for a kiss. His arms went around my waist and one arm went up to the back of my neck. Just the feel on his skin on mine caused a gasp to escape my lips. After a moment of our kiss his hands dwindled down to my bra snap. I moved my arms in front of his chest to slide the straps off. He pushed me back down onto the bed and looked at me, taking in every inch of me. He took one lonesome finger and traced a line down my neck and shoulder to my side and to my night shorts. He looked up at me before continuing.

"You're beautiful…" he whispered deeply. I bit my lip and watched as his fingers tugged at the top of my shorts. I lifted my hips just enough to help him slid them off. He licked his lips when they were off and again, took me in. He ran his rough hands up my legs and smirked a little. He grabbed my hips and pulled me down to meet him. He leaned over me again and kissed my neck. My hands rested on his shoulders as he kissed down my neck and to the center of my chest. He paid special attention to my naval as he continued his descent. I let out a sharp gasp and shifted just a tad when he got to the rim of my panties. He slipped one finger on the side and slowly moved it down by my thigh.

My eyes were closed but they suddenly opened when I didn't feel him anymore. I looked down at him as he was taking off his pants and boxers. I felt the nerves kick in looking at him, wondering how I never had him before this and why it took so long. He hooked one finger on each side of my panty and pulled them off. He ran his hands up my sides on last time before sliding on a condom. He looked at me one last time for assurance before entering me. I gave a slight nod and he continued.

I was almost shaking with anticipation when he finally entered me. My back arched into him and my eyes fluttered closed feeling him inside me, so close, no near. His pace started slow and gentle as he hovered over me and kissed my face. I kissed his collarbone softly as he moved within me, small gasps letting loose as he quickened his pace. His hands entangled in my hair and lips moving across my hot skin as we finally let each other in.

"Jack…" I moaned digging my nails into his shoulders. The room was filled with the sounds of our breathless moans, our bodies were moving together as one, sliding across each others hot, sweaty skin. A chaste kiss every now and then just to relish the feel of one another's lips. The built up lust, love and desire since we had met in the pit of my stomach. The pleasure I was feeling, the love, what he was giving to me and making me feel. The feeling of being so close to the person you never want to be away from. All unfolded in my room with the soft moon light shining through my window. Detroit never felt so serene and calm. And my life has never felt so complete.

_I'll be your dream _

_I'll be your wish _

_I'll be your fantasy _

_I'll be your hope _

_I'll be your love _

_Be everything that you need _

_I'll love you more with every breath _

_Truly, madly, deeply do _

_I will be strong _

_I will be faithful 'cause I_

_'m counting on _

_A new beginning _

_A reason for living _

_A deeper meaning, yeah _

_I want to stand with you on a mountain _

_I want to bathe with you in the sea _

_I want to lay like this forever _

_Until the sky falls down on me _

_And when the stars are shining brightly in the velvet sky, _

_I'll make a wish send it to heaven _

_Then make you want to cry _

_T__he tears of joy for all the pleasure in the certainty _

_That we're surrounded by the comfort and protection of _

_The highest powers _

_In lonely hours _

_The tears devour you _

_I want to stand with you on a mountain _

_I__ want to bathe with you in the sea _

_I want to lay like this forever _

_Until the sky falls down on me _

_Oh can you see it baby? _

_You don't have to close your eyes _

_'Cause it's standing rightbefore you _

_All that you need will surely come _

_I'll be your dream _

_I'll be your wish_

_I'll be your wish _

_I'll be your fantasy _

_I'll be your hope _

_I'll be your love _

_Be everything that you need_


	13. Realizations

I woke up to the best feeling in the world. The feeling of her bare skin on mine, her breath on my chest, and hair scattered across the pillow and some in my face. I brushed her hair down and ran a finger over her shoulder and down her arm. I felt her skin shiver under my finger and smiled. I moved gently from underneath her arm and scooted down so I was face with her shoulder. I propped myself up on my elbow and ran a lonely finger down back. I moved the blanket down until it was about to uncover her bottom and started to move my finger back up. I traced invisible lines along her back and sides, watching her twitch and let out small gasps. I stopped with my finger and leaned over to straddle her back lightly. I started at the small of her back and slowly kissed my way up the center of her back. Kissing every inch of her spine.

"Jackie…" she moaned. I felt her hand come rest on the back of my head as I finally made my way to her neck. I nibbled her neck gently and moved my lips to her ear.

"Good morning." I whispered. I saw her cheeks turn up, she was smiling.

"Yes, it is. Now get off me you big ape. How did you get in last night?" she laughed. I rolled off her and reclaimed my spot next to her. She rolled over to her back and held the sheet over her body as she sat up.

"Paisley was just getting home and she used her key. And it's not like I haven't seen ya naked before, Em." I told her casually, lighting a cigarette. She laughed and punched my arm.

"So, I still don't like parading around naked." she told me, sitting back against the headboard. I took the cigarette from my lips and passed it to her. She smirked and took it from me.

"Why not? You got a smoking body and it is your place. It's not like Bobby will be walking around. And hell, he doesn't live alone and he walks around naked, you know that first hand." I laughed recalling the day she walked out to see Bobby walking around in his boxers.

"Please, don't remind me. I'm not sure what's worse, that or the sounds coming from Angel's room at night. Between the two it's bound to give a girl nightmares." she shuddered. I laughed and took the cigarette from her.

"All I'm saying is you don't need to be bashful around me of in your own house. No one is just gonna walk in and see you." I finished.

This is what I hated. I try to prove a point and someone has to shatter it. Bobby loved doing that. Even when he didn't realize he was doing it, he managed to do it. At that particular moment, trying to prove a point, we heard her front door open and shut. The next thing that flooded our ears was the horrible sound of Bobby first thing in the morning.

Emilie's eyes went wide and we both shot out of bed and scurried to grab our clothes. I quickly pulled my clothes on and she ran into the bathroom. Right as she turned the shower on Bobby and Angel burst into the room.

"What are you doing?" We asked at the same time. Bobby gave me a weary glance and looked at the bathroom door.

"We were looking for you. We thought you ran off, so we came to see if Diddle knew where you were at." Angel said walking around me like a animal about to attack. His eyes were narrowed and I knew what he was thinking, what both of them were thinking. They was thinking something happened, which it did, but we didn't want them to know that. Not yet at least.

"I was a little upset so I came over here last night." I told him casually. Angel crossed his arms and continued to circle me.

"What are you doing in Diddle's room?" Bobby asked walking over to the bathroom door.

"I came to see if she was up and found she was in the shower." I lied. Angel didn't stop moving as Bobby finished the interrogation.

"Where did you sleep?" he asked. Angel stopped for a moment until I held my hand at him.

"Couch." I told them. Angel started walking again and I sighed. He was way too protective.

"Then why are _both_ of her pillows crumpled?" Bobby asked trying not to smirk when Angel stopped in my face and glared at me.

"I'm a wild sleeper." Emilie said finally emerging from the bathroom. She was toweling her hair and smiled at Angel. The one thing she knew would make him forget about the whole situation. And for safety reasons, she shot Bobby a stern glare for him to not say anything or drag it on.

"Hey Diddle." Angel greeted and gave me one last glare.

She walked over and hugged him. She gave me a shy smile as she sat down on the bed. I guess I'm kinda glad they showed up. I knew this morning would be full of shy glances and smiled as we waited for last night to really settle. Them showing up made us act normal and really realize that there is nothing to be shy about.

"How did you guys get in?" she asked curiously.

"We found your spare key at Ma's. Thought we'd drop by." Bobby told her. She glanced at me and then crossed her arms.

"Give it here." she demanded. Bobby looked at Angel and back at her.

"Why?" Bobby asked.

"Because this is my house. You can't just barge in here, like you just did." she told them. Bobby scoffed.

"And if it's an emergency?" he asked.

"You're the Michigan Mauler, kick the fucking door down." she told him. "The key, please." she demanded again.

"But we just thought that ya, you wouldn't mine. We're kinda like family…" Angel tried. She looked at him and let her hands fall to her side.

"Angel, I'm not Sofi. _Mi casa no es su casa_." she told him. I was barely able to hid my laugh but Bobby let it slip. Angel could never get mad at her so he turned to Bobby.

"You need to stop with that Sofi stuff, you're rubbing off on her." Angel whined to Bobby. He threw his hands up in the air and finally handed Emilie her key. She shoved it into her back pocket and smiled.

"Now you wanna tell me why you barged in here?" she asked.

"We were looking for Jack." Bobby told her.

"Why?" she asked. Bobby smirked at her.

"Because we need him. You ready, ya fairy?" Bobby asked. I growled and stood up.

"Yeah, let me use the bathroom and I'll be down." I told them. I waited until they walked out and turned to Emilie.

"I guess I'm going." I told her softly. She smiled and walked over to me.

"I'll see you later?" she asked. I smirked and brushed a strand of hair from her face.

"If ya want." I told her. She nodded slowly and leaned up to kiss me. I parted her lips with my tongue and cupped her face in my hands. She melted into my chest and lightly scraped her nails down my chest. I pulled away and rested my head on hers. I felt her slip something into my hand and looked down at it.

"Your key?" I smirked. She shrugged and sat down on her bed.

"Incase you need to get in when I'm asleep or not here." she told me. I slid the key in my pocket and nodded. "But no telling Bobby or Angel." she told me. I smirked and kissed her lips once again.

"I'll see you later." I whispered. She smiled and laid back down in the bed as I walked out.

* * *

"All right, I'm here." Jerry said getting out of his car. Bobby and Angel had drug me out of Emilie's place to come talk to Jerry and the store owner.

"What?" he asked looking at us. I lowered my head as Angel spoke.

"Last night we found out it wasn't random. The witness was paid, and the whole gang story was some bullshit." Angel told him. Jerry stared at us.

"Are you serious, man? Come on now." Jerry sighed. We nodded and I looked over to see the old store owner. We walked over and he looked at us wearily.

"Yeah. Can I help you, gentlemen?" he asked.

"Yeah, if we could just have a moment of your time, sir. Evelyn Mercer was our mother." I told him politely.

"She was a good lady. I liked her very much. Let's come inside." he said fiddling with his keys.

We walked inside and Bobby asked to see the tape. We stood around as the old man hooked the television up and put the tape in. He have us one last look before starting the tape. We watched Ma walk into the store and start scolding a little kid. I wanted to crack a smile but I knew what was coming. I felt my heart sink even further when Emilie walked in just seconds later.

"Emilie was there?" Angel asked. Jerry nodded and we looked back at the tape. The boy was gone and Emilie was walking into the bathroom. Ma was looking at turkey's when two men barged into the store. My hands started to shake when they shot the clerk and walked back to Ma.

"This doesn't add up. He's already got the money." Bobby whispered as the men cornered Ma. I held my hands to my mouth to try to stop the shaking as I watched him aim and then shoot. The tears fell and I turned away from my brothers.

The only reason I turned around was Angel's gasp. I turned back to see Emilie on the screen. I dropped my hands and felt my heart break all over again. She called the police and crawled back over to Ma. She laid Ma's head in her lap and cried.

"My Diddle." Angel whispered. Jerry put a comforting arm around him and Bobby spoke up.

"Supposedly, a witness told police this was a gang shooting. You know anything about that?" Bobby asked hiding the cracks in his voice. I walked to the back and started pacing. Emilie saw all of that. I knew she had been there but she saw the damage. She lost another person before her very own eyes.

"The police talked for a long time with one man. One man more than the others." the old man told him.

"Would you remember what he looks like if you see him?: Bobby asked.

"He comes in for Gatorade after the games. Big guy. Always wears sweats, never a jacket. Even with snow or rain. He has a dog and a…" he said waving a hand around his head. "You know a…" he trailed off.

"A fro? Like an Afro?" Angel asked. "Like Ben Wallace, the basketball player?"

"Pistons. Yes, yes, Ben Wallace." the man said relieved.

"Okay." Angel nodded.

"Is he on the courts a lot?" Bobby asked.

"On the courts or at the gym." the man told us. We nodded and left the store.

"That wasn't no gang shooting, that was an execution. They set Mom up. They set her up." Bobby declared walking out the store. "Come on." he said and we ran across the street to the gym.

We walked in to see a game in progress. Bobby walked to the sideline and looked around.

"You guys ready?" he asked.

"What's the plan, Bobby?" Jerry asked.

"We're winging it, Jerry." Bobby told him looking around.

"We always winging it." Jerry whined.

"We're gonna get killed." I whined from behind them. Angel and Bobby turned to look at me.

"What you mean _we_. white boy?" Angel asked. I rolled my eyes and watched as Bobby got ready.

"You ready?" Bobby asked him. Angel nodded and they walked off in different directions. Jerry pointed at them and I sighed.

"Here we go."

"Excuse me." Bobby yelled walking into the middle of the court.

"I'll handle it. I don't know what the hell you think you're doing, but you better get the hell out of here, friend." the referee said walking up to Bobby.

"I'd love to, friend, but I can't." Bobby said snatching the ball from him. He started bouncing the ball and yelled. "Yeah! I got the rock now! I got this motherfucker now!" he yelled at the players. A few walked up to him and he taunted them more. "What? What? I got the rock!" he yelled.

"What, bitch?" one player yelled before Bobby smacked him in the face with the basketball. He threw him to the floor and some guys started to pool around him. Jerry walked onto the court as Bobby pulled out a gun. Jerry ran over there and stood next to him.

"No need to grab me. This will only take a second. Now shut up and listen!" Bobby yelled into the mad crowd. They booed him and shouted at him but hi was determined.

"My name is Bobby Mercer. And some of you probably knew my mother. And some of you probably know

she was shot about a week ago across the street. Sixty-two years old, murdered in cold blood!"

"Think about it, Bobby, think. Think!" Jerry told him looking around nervously. He was aggravated but he wasn't going to let them touch Bobby, even if it meant Camille going off on him.

"I'm looking for the witness." He continued and them looked at Jerry. "I got this."

"Ballplayer. Big guy. Supposedly never wears a coat. Dog lover. Ring any bells?" Bobby asked. Through all the kids yelling and standing I was one kid stand up and shake his head. He started towards the side doors and I followed him.

"You tell me where l can find the guy and you can finish your game. All we wanna do is talk to the guy. You can end this real quickly." I heard Bobby yell as I pushed through the doors. I saw the kid look back and take off down the hall.

"Hey! Hey, kid! No running in the halls!" I yelled running after him. He ran and tried to push through another set of doors but it didn't budge. He fell back and I caught him.

"Get off me, man!" he yelled.

"Why you running?" I asked holding him while Angel walked through the door. No wonder it didn't budge.

"Get off me, man. Man, i don't know nothing." he yelled again as I held him in front of an pissed of looking Angel.

"Why don't you shut up?" I told him.

"You got something to tell me, youngster?" Angel asked. The boy sighed and nodded his head slowly. Angel looked at me and I let him go. I walked back to the court and waved for Bobby and Jerry. Jerry pointed and Bobby said his good byes to the angry crowd.

"What do we got here?" Bobby asked walking over to us.

"Bobby, meet Keenon. Keenon, this is Bobby. Something tells me he was on his way to deliver a warning." Angel filled him in.

"What's his name, Keenon?" Bobby asked.

"Damian. He's my brother." Keenon told him.

"He's your brother? No shit. These are my brothers." Bobby told him. Keenon looked around at us and back at Bobby.

"No, dog. He's my real brother." Keenon said again.

"Yeah, these are my real brothers. This is Angel, I'm Bobby. This is Jack and Jeremiah." Bobby told him pointing to each of us. "So, what about you and Damian? You guys still close? Does he live at home with you?" he asked.

"Yeah. But I ain't telling you shit else." Keenon defended.

"I wouldn't sell out my brothers either." Angel agreed with him.

"Just calm down, okay?" Bobby said taking Keenon's backpack off and handing it to Angel. "Look, we just wanna talk to him. We wanna ask him a few questions. Is he gonna cooperate?" Booby asked. Keenon scoffed and Angel pulled out a paper from his bag.

"We got something." Jerry told him.

"Address?" Bobby asked. Jerry nodded and tapped the paper.

"He lives in the Gardens, right over there." Jerry told us.

"Enjoy the rest of the game, okay? Don't worry about it." Bobby told him patting his shoulder. I grabbed the paper from Jerry as Bobby walked off.

"These are nice grades. Better stay in school." I told him.

"What is that?" Jerry asked holding Keenon's chain. "Aluminum?"

"Shit doesn't even spin." I said looking at it. Me and Jerry shook our heads and walked off. We walked out to Bobby's car and parked in front of the building where Damien lived. Everyone one silent as we sat alone for the first time.

"I didn't know she was there." Angel spoke up first from the front seat. Jerry was sitting in the back with me and looked over.

"Did she tell you?" he asked. Bobby looked at us in the rearview.

"Yeah, she had a bad dream the other night. Said she saw it all over again. That's when we found out." I told him softly. I saw Angel shake his head.

"I should have been there." he whispered. Bobby grabbed his shoulder and squeezed.

"We all should have been here. For both of them." Bobby told him, knowing that blaming wasn't right here.

"They must not have seen her go in." Angel mumbled.

"She did come in moments after Ma. Probably were setting up when Emilie got out and went inside." Jerry told him. I nodded and leaned against the window as silence and guilt filled the car.

"I just don't get it. Why would somebody hire a goddamn killer to shoot Mom?" Jerry finally asked.

"Here's an idea: We'll wait for the shit head to get back and we'll ask him." Bobby told him looking out the window.

"Well, y'all do what y'all gotta do. I got gymnastics. Come on, let me out." Jerry said hitting the back of Bobby's seat. That broke the tension. Angel and Bobby both started laughing.

"You got your leotard on, Jerry?" Bobby teased.

"Go to hell. Y'all know what I'm talking about. I got a schedule to keep. Girls got gymnastics, I gotta take them. Come on, let me out, man." Jerry defended himself.

"You wanna take Cracker Jack with you? He's very flexible." Bobby asked opening his door and leaning his seat up.

"Bobby, you're the one who took ballet." I told him as Jerry got out. "Jerry, will you stop by Em's on your way?" I asked. Angel shot me a death glare from the front and Jerry poked his head back in.

"Yeah, sure. Ya'll be careful." He told us and started to walk off.

"All right, Jerry." Bobby said to Jerry.

"All right, man." Jerry yelled walking to his car.

_"I don't mind,If it rains or freezes.Long as I got,my plastic Jesus. Riding on the dashboard_." I started to sing making

"I don't know how you did it for so many years. Must have driven you crazy, Angel. You're on a ship for what, six months at a time with nothing but dudes?" Bobby asked shaking his head.

"It wasn't a ship. And the Marines went coed. They got girls now." Angel informed him.

"Yeah, I bet you them girls look like dudes too, though." Bobby mumbled.

"Not after six months they don't." Angle told him. They both started laughing again.

_"Comes in colorsPink and pleasant.Glows in the dark_." I continued to sing until something caught my eye. "Oh, that's him. It's him!" I yelled to them pointing at Keenon's brother from the window. We jumped out the car and ran to catch up with him inside.

"Yo, Damian! You Damian?" Bobby yelled and pulled out a gun. Damien's eyes widened and he jumped in the elevator.

"Why are you pulling out guns and shit, dog?" Angel yelled.

"Yo!" Bobby yelled kicking the doors as they closed.

"Jack, stay here. Tell me where it stops." he told me. They took off upstairs and I watched the numbers.

"Four. Five. Six. Come on, come on. Shit! Six. It stopped." I mumbled and ran to the door.

"Six! He stopped at six!" I yelled up the stairs. I started walking upstairs when both were coming back down. We walked outside and I saw him laying on the ground.

"Man, you must be freezing." I called out to him.

"You won't be needing this no more, playboy." Angel said scooping up his gun that fell with him.

"You know why we're here, Damian?" Bobby asked as we walked up. I winced when I saw his leg.

"Come on, man, call me an ambulance." he begged.

"An ambulance? What, for my dog bites? I'm gonna be okay." Bobby said looking at his arms. "You give me a name, I'll call 911. I wanna know who shot up that liquor store now." he asked.

"Man, I didn't shoot no one." Damien mumbled.

"Say what? Speak up. Can't hear you, playboy. It's hard to hear you out here with all this wind. If we leave, ain't nobody else gonna hear you out here either." Angel told him smirking.

"They say it's gonna be a cold night. You ain't gonna make it far with that leg." I added in.

"Look, man, these two fools said they'd pay me a few dubs if I said I saw some gangsters shoot up the place, all right?" he finally spat out. "But I didn't hurt no one!" he added.

"Alright well, turn into a fucking Fudgesicle." Angel told him and started to turn around.

"Hey, come on, man! I can't say nothing!" Damien screamed.

"Fair enough. You're gonna die right here." Bobby told him. Angle and him started walking away, I stalled but went anyways.

"Yo, man, come on! Yo, man!" Damien called out.

"I'm calling his bluff." Bobby told us.

"Hey, come on! Call an ambulance!" Damien yelled from behind us.

"Think he gonna break?" Angel asked.

"You see that sparerib hanging out of his leg? It's just a matter of time." Bobby told him.

"You sure?" Angel asked.

"You wanna put money on it?" Bobby said and stopped walking.

"Are you sure?" He asked again.

"Someone help me!" Damien screamed and I turned around.

"Turn around, dick lips!" Angel yelled at me.

"What the fuck you looking at?" Bobby said at the same time.

"I'll tell you where you can find him!" Damien yelled out for us.

"Come on!" Bobby said and we walked back to him.

"Just call me an ambulance." Damien pleaded.

"Give me a name." Bobby demanded.

"Where can we find him?" Angel asked.

"They go to the Casino every night. That's where I meet them to get my money. One has a long goatee. You can find them there or around there." Damien spilled. We nodded and piled into Bobby's car after calling 911 for him.

* * *

I laid back down in bed after Jack had left. I smiled up at the ceiling and closed my eyes when the scent from the pillow he slept on rushed over me. I sighed and pulled the blanket over my face. Subconsciously thinking someone would see my blush and act like a little school girl. Last night had been the best night I had in a long time. It was probably the best sex I had too.

"My god, shut up, Emilie." I laughed out loud.

"Ummm your talking to yourself and you have a pillow over your head, should I call the looney bin?" Paisley's voice filled the air. I laughed and shot up from under the blanket. I'm not sure if it was the smile, the blush or whatever it was, but she recognized it and jumped on me squealing.

"You're kidding?" she squealed, snuggling under my blanket and laying her head next to mine on my pillow.

"I'm not. And any other time I would say it's none of your business but oh my god, Pais." I grinned. She squealed again and hugged me.

"I heard Jack was good, but day-um!" She smiled. I narrowed my eyes and she bit her lip. "Sorry. But it's not like he was a virgin. He told you how he was."

"I know and I wasn't a virgin either but…yummmm." I laughed and covered my face and then quickly uncovered it. "Now I see why Lydia didn't want to let go!" I laughed. Paisley let out a loud laugh and buried her face in my pillow.

We laid there and I told her about last night. About how he touched me, kissed me and everything other little detail I could say without getting to personal. After about an hour and a half of girl talk, which so relieved me, we got up to make lunch.

"So are you dating?" she asked, picking pieces of her grilled cheese off.

"I don't know. He hasn't asked. We haven't really talked about anything or done anything until last night. I mean sure a little flirting now and then but we've been pre-occupied." I told her.

"Talk to him." she said pointing at me. I smirked and finished off my soda.

"I will." I promised as her phone started to ring. She talked for a minute and gave me a sad smile.

"I gotta go. Works calls." she said getting up and grabbing her coat. I hugged her by and closed the door as she left. Before I could get back to my kitchen someone knocked on the door. I wondered who it could be, I wasn't expecting anyone, Jack had a key and Paisley would have used her spare to get it.

"Hey Jerry." I greeted as I opened the door. He gave me a sad smile and I quickly ushered him in.

"I can't stay long, I gotta get the girls. But Jack wanted me to stop by." he said softly. I wrinkled my nose in confusion and grabbed him a soda from the fridge.

"What's going on?" I asked. He sighed and popped the cap on his drink.

"They went out after we left last night." he started and I nodded. "They talked to a few people."

"Did they find out anything?" I asked casually. He chuckled a little and nodded.

"A lot." he said and paused. He grabbed my hand and looked at my softly. "Ma's death wasn't an accident."

My chest tightened.

"What do you mean?" I asked. He sighed and started to explain how the witness said he saw two guys running in and shooting Evelyn while playing basketball. Only thing was the lights turned off at 10 and Evelyn was killed at 11. Then he said they found the witness's brother.

"What did he have to say?" I asked.

"I left before they confronted him. I'm sure Jack will tell you later." he told me. I nodded and wiped away the tears.

"I knew something was wrong about that night, Jerry." I whispered. "They had already taken the money, nothing seemed or felt right."

"I know, Em." he whispered. "We saw the tape." I shot my head up and held back a sob.

"You did?" I croaked out, he nodded and walked over to kneel next to me.

"I'm so sorry, Diddle. I knew you had been there but I never thought how bad it had to have been until today." he cried softly pulling me into a hug.

I let him hold me while I broke down, again. I knew something wasn't right and each day the feeling in the pit of my stomach grew bigger and bigger. I knew this wasn't going to end pretty and I had a bad feeling I'd loose someone else. As much as I wanted them to catch the guys that did this, I couldn't risk loosing anyone else.

I needed them, all four of them.


	14. No Sleep

**Thanks for the reviews! I'm sorry it took longer than usual. I've ended a story,_ sniffles,_ and started a new one, so I got sidetracked! BUT - Not need to fear, I'm back on track! So here it is, enjoy!! And dun dun dun, BIG drama is coming up soon, so watch out!**

* * *

The whole way to the Casino where Damien had sent us, I thought about Emilie. Inside I knew why we were going to find these guys but it still didn't seem real to me. But the closer we got, the more nervous I became. We were going after the guys that shot our mother. The guys that could have killed Emilie if she hadn't been in the bathroom. And now, I knew, we were going to kill them. There was no doubt about it. But that was dangerous. One of us could get hurt. One of us could die. Part of me felt selfish for putting myself in this situation, knowing that if anything happened to me, or any of us for that matter, Emilie would be crushed. She'd loose another person. And I felt guilty for that. But at the same time, these guys killed my mother, and again, could have killed Emilie. No amount of guilt can change what they did and what we need to do. None.

"Goatee. Goatee. Look for the man with the goatee." Angel said as we walked into the restaurant. We stood at the entrance and looked around. My eyes scanned the room and landed on two guys at the bar. One was flirting with the bartender and guess what? He had a goatee.

"There he is." I said nudging Bobby.

"Where?" he asked looking in the direction of my gaze.

"Right there. The guy with the goatee." I raised my voice and my hand, just slightly tired of this night and wanting it to end.

"I see. Put your fucking hand down, Jackie!" Bobby said slapping my arm down. I saw the other guy point over at us and the guy the with the goatee met our gaze.

"I see him. I see him. Come on. Let's get him." Bobby said and started for his gun. But before hr got to it, the guys had theirs out and fired.

"Get down!" Bobby yelled.

"Damn!" I mumbled as Bobby started pushing us to follow the guys out, who were heading to the side door.

"Go, go, go!" Bobby yelled as we ran down the side of the bar.

"Run, y'all!" Angel yelled. "Move!"

"Everybody move!" Bobby yelled to the people who were not moving from the aisle way. "Go, go."

"Clear the way." Angel growled shoving a guy to the side.

"Excuse me." I mumbled, not knowing why I was being so polite but hoping they'd move if I was.

"Move! Come on! Come on!" Bobby screamed when one guy grabbed him and wouldn't let go.

"Go ahead, you fucking punks!" the guy yelled when Bobby finally got free. We all three barreled out the door and I pulled out the shot gun. I fired at the rear end of the car as it drove off.

"Get it, Jackie-o!" Bobby yelled running up behind me as I let my third shot sound. "You go, girl! Let's get these mother fuckers." He said and took off for the car.

I jumped in the back and Angel hopped up front and barely got his door shut when Bobby sped off. Bobby sped off down the street after the car, snow nearly blinding us as we drove.

"Punch it, Bobby! Punch it!" Angel yelled as we slowly lost view of the car in front of us.

"I got no traction! I'm sliding all over the fucking street!" Bobby yelled at him. We were already sliding all over the place when the car made a sharp turn. Bobby tried to slow down before we turned but the car slide sideways into a couple parked cars.

"Hold on! Shit! Shit!" he yelled as he tried to pull back onto the street but ended up scraping down the row of parked cars even more. "I scraped the whole side of my fucking car!" he whined when he finally got away and looked out his window. So he was more worried about his car, just great.

"Get these guys before you kill us!" I yelled at him from the backseat.

"Sit back and put your seat belt on, Jack." he ordered me.

"Watch the snow, man!" Angel yelled as bobby sped off down the streets again, only gaining control over the car just a little.

"I don't give a fuck about the snow!" Bobby yelled. All of a sudden shots were heard and a two bullets bolted through the front of the car windshield. I ducked and Bobby swerved.

"Shit!" Bobby yelled looking back at me. "Where the hell's that shotgun, Jack?" he asked. I grabbed the gun and checked the chamber and cursed.

"There's no shells." I yelled throwing the gun down.

"Stop arguing and drive." Angel yelled at us when Bobby turned around to look at me.

"They're in the trunk." he yelled.

"What the hell am I--?" I started, wondering how in the hell he expected me to get in the trunk and get the shells.

"Sit down and shut up!" He screamed and picked up his gun from the floorboard. "Angel, stick that cannon out the window and bust some shots!"

"I'm gonna put one in the back of their heads!" Angel said throwing his arm out the window and firing.

"Shoot those sons of bitches, Angel!" Bobby cheered him on. Angel fired and kept his head back as the sparks came out the back. "Get them! Shoot that motherfucker!" Bobby kept yelling. Angel kept firing and soon the car in front swerved and Angel stopped.

"You got him!" Bobby shrieked. I watched the car in front of us swerve and eventually hit a snow bank and slide sideways.

"Look out! Jackie, you got your seat belt on?" Bobby said warned me. "Watch this. Hold on." he yelled as he plowed into the rear end of the car, turning it around and sending us into the street spinning.

"Oh, shit!" he yelled as we spun. We finally stopped and we saw the other car starting to drive away again. "Shit!" he yelled and sped off after them

"Don't let them get away! Don't let them get away!" I yelled from the back. Bobby tried to catch up with them and they started firing again.

"Shit!" Bobby cursed feeling the shots hit the car.

"I'm over this shit!" Angel growled and leaned out the window to get a better show at them. My mind raced. I wasn't worried about Sofi going all crazy on us for letting Angel do this, it was Emilie I was afraid of. Sure he was a Marine but she was still not too fond of any of us putting ourselves in dangerous situations. Especially hanging out the window of a car, skidding across the snow, while firing at a car in front of us, firing back and also skidding across the snow. This is a good way to get killed even if we survived this joy ride

"Pop them, Angel! Pop them!" Bobby chanted. The car must have hit something because it jerked and nearly sent angel flying out the window.

"Whoa! Whoa!" I yelled. frantically grabbing his arm to pull him as Bobby grabbed the back of his jacket.

"Get them! Angel, get your ass in here!" he yelled. We felt another jerk and I saw sparks by Bobby's window. We looked out and guess what?

"Shit! We got a fucking blowout!" Bobby cursed looking at his front tire. This was enough. Angel nearly fell out the window. We lost a tire. One more wrong move and we could be dead.

"Bobby, let's just stop the car! Okay, Bobby? Let's stop!" I yelled from behind him.

"Shut up, Jack! I'm gonna ride this bitch out on the rim! We got them!" he yelled, not wanting to give up now, which I understood. If we let them go now, we might not get them. But risking our lives? This was nuts. But he kept driving, as sparks flew past his window. The screeching of the metal on the road and the howling of the wind rushing through the window and my ears. We crossed over a bridge and Bobby finally got closer.

"Ready?" he asked getting closer to their bumper. " Hold on. Hold on. I got them now. I got them." he mumbled trying to get a little in front of their bumper.

"We got them now. We got them." He kept yelling and caught up to their rear end. "Hold on!" he yelled and jerked the wheel to the left, smashing into the side of the car.

"Get them! Get them!" me and Angel cheered, as the car was sent flying sideways.

"Hold on!" Bobby yelled one last time. He jerked the wheel again and we smashed into the side of the car and sent it flipping over a few times.

"Yeah! Yeah!" I cheered as the car rolled in front of us.

"Wooo!" Angel hollered.

"Whoa! Yeah!" Bobby laughed and drove a few feet further to the car.

"That's what the fuck I'm talking about, Bobby." Angel laughed and smacked his arm playfully. Bobby stopped the car and we all jumped out. Angel and Bobby drew their guns as we walked to the car.

"Jack, you wait here." Bobby order and I stopped. I watched them walk to the car, gun in hands, yelling that the men.

"Get your punk ass out the car." Angel yelled as Bobby went to kicking the guy that was trying to crawl away.

"Fuck you!" one of the guy sputtered.

"Who sent you?" Angel demanded.

"I ain't telling you shit!" the guy yelled. Angel started kicking him too. I watched as my brother's kicked the living shit out of these guys.

"Get his wallet." Bobby told Angel.

"You fucked with the wrong lady." Angel growled. Both raised their guns and fired one shot each. And I stood in shock as the yelling of the men stopped and all I heard was the howling wind and my brothers walking back to me.

"Let's get the fuck out of here, man." Angel yelled running to the car.

"Let's go Jack! Come on." Bobby said tugging at my jacket.

"Are they dead?" I asked turning around to get back into the car.

"Yeah, they gone!" Angel cheered

"They killed Mom. We got them." Bobby assured me as we jumped back into his car and drove off. We didn't say a word as Bobby drove off to find a place to dump the car.

Apparently, he knew somebody who had a shop and he let us drop it off in the back of the garage. Angel and Bobby ended up catching a ride with him back to the house but I opted for the bus. I was making a tiny detour.

I slid the tiny key out my back pocket and unlocked her apartment. I opened the door and slowly shut it, looking at the clock.

2:36am.

I laid the key on the counter and took my jacket and shoes off. I was about to walk into the hallway when something moved on the couch.

"Jackie?" she mumbled sitting up on the couch. I smirked and walked over to the front of the couch. She sat up on her elbows waiting for her eyes to adjust. Her hair slightly sticking out and the blankets barely covering her exposed legs.

"Hey, Em." I whispered sitting next to her on the couch. She laid her head back down and looked up at me.

"You okay?" she asked. I thought about it for a second and smiled.

"I am now. You wanna go to bed?" I asked. She nodded and I scooped her up into my arms. Usually, she complained but tonight she simply let me carry her into the room and lay her on the bed. She instantly curled under the bed as I stripped off my shirt and jeans. I lifted the covers up so I could get in and laid down next to her. She moved closer and laid her head on my shoulder, tracing the tattoo's on my chest.

"Tell me what's going on. I wanna know. Jerry told me what happened up until he left." she whispered. I sighed and rubbed circles on her back.

"We talked to Damien, the witness. Two guys paid him to say that he saw the gang bangers run in there. They were hired to kill Ma." I told her softly.

"By who?" she asked.

"Not sure yet." I whispered. She moved up on her elbow and looked at me.

"Yet? Yet as in, you're going to?" she asked. I sighed and closed my eyes.

"Yes." I answered, figuring it best not to lie to her. She was silent for a moment, probably shocked that I was honest.

"What happened to the shooters, Jack?" she asked so softly I barely heard her. I looked at her and the sadness shown on her face. The mixed feelings of wanting to know and not wanting to know. This time I figured it best not to say anything.

"Let's just go to sleep." I told her. She kept staring at me and I knew she knew. She knew what happened to them, she knew we killed them. She even knew, that I knew, that she knew what happened and knowing that, she knew nothing else needed to be said.

And nothing was said, as she curled into my arm and fell asleep.

* * *

Today was the second day in a row Bobby ruined our morning. I was sighing contently, loving the feeling of being on cloud nine, as Jack slowly moved his lips up the side my neck and to the soft spot under my ear when my cell started ringing. We ignored it the firs time but when both of our phones went off Jack reluctantly pulled away. So both of us were already in a bad mood when we got there, me more so than Jack. Jack found a way to take my mind off of him going after this drama but Bobby and Angel couldn't do what Jack did, so they surely will suffer my wrath.

"You're such a pussy, Bobby." Sofi mumbled when Bobby jerked his arm away while she was cleaning it. Supposedly, he'd gotten attacked by dogs.

"Give me a break, will ya?" he groaned.

"It should be against the law for people to keep dogs where someone like you can get to them." Sofi ranted. He rolled his eyes and then glared at me.

"Why'd you let her do this? You could have done it better." he whined. I crossed my arms and leaned against the doorframe behind Angel.

"I wanted to see her torture you." I told him roughly. Angel chuckled and walked away.

"Hey, y'all! Police in the house!" Angel yelled a few minutes later. I rolled my eyes and moved into the living room as everyone scurried around. Why do they put themselves through this?

"Get me something to cover my arm." Bobby ordered Sofi.

"Yeah, yeah." she mumbled running off.

"Hurry up." he hissed.

"Angel. Mind if we come in?" Green asked walking into the kitchen as Bobby sat on the couch, clad in her pink printed robe. That woman needs help. We are trying to take attention away from him, not bring it all to him.

"You're already in. Cops are always welcome at the Mercers'. It makes us feel safe and cozy. Just the way we like it." I heard Angel tell him and I laughed on the inside.

"Whoo. Ain't you sexy?" Green laughed looking at Bobby.

"Thank you." Bobby said getting up. "Jackie wanted this little number for himself, but I fought him for it." he told him. I suppressed the urge to get up and slap him but stopped myself. Today was not a good day.

"What happened to the hand?" Green asked pointing to Bobby's hand. I looked at it and groaned. The woman can't do shit right. I sent her a glare and she returned it. She's really pushing her luck today.

"Did you happen to forget our little conversation we had at your brother's house about not interfering with our investigation?" Green finished, as Jack stood claim next to me.

"Oh, no, no. This is Turkey Cup, man. Hockey. An old Mercer family tradition. You remember that, don't you, Green? You played hockey. Guys can be pretty rough out on that ice." Bobby explained smirking at Green.

"Where's you car, Bobby? It's not outside." Green asked. Bobby faltered a bit and then the last person I thought would speak up to save him, did just that. Now I just hoped that she didn't spit something stupid out, like she always did.

"We left it at Jeremiah's." Sofi spoke up. I let out a sigh of relief, maybe I should give her more credit. That thought was trashed when she sent me a '_Beat that'_ look.

"Yeah. Jerry drove us home." Angel spoke up and walked next to Bobby. "You know, Volvos are one of the safest cars out there. Volvos are incredible, man, when it's a blizzard outside. So we-" Angel was cut off.

"Fascinating." Fowler said walking towards Bobby, pulling a tiny bag out of his coat. "Hey, Gretzky, you know what this is?" he asked holding it up. I couldn't really see it but Bobby's next comment told me what I needed to know.

"A hair from your wife's tit?" Bobby asked.

"Try from your thick skull. Forensics took it off a pair of contract killers we found dead this morning." Fowler told him.

Now, let me explain this, cause it might be odd. I knew what went down last night. I didn't need anyone to tell me but I knew. The look on Jack's face, the vibe he had, said it all for me. But knowing and actually hearing and having the police say it, was totally different for me. And that statement sent chills up my spine. They actually killed someone.

"Fishing for a confession with a phony hair, huh? That's an old one, boys." Bobby said smirking at Green, who was also smirking. He patted Fowler's back knowing that it wouldn't work.

"Come on, Green." Bobby said sitting back down on the couch. "You know when I'll know you got my hair off a dead body, right? When I hear the jailhouse doors close behind me, girls." he told them.

"Okay, then you tell me what they told you. You think that these thugs were hired to kill Evelyn, is that it?" Green asked.

"I have no idea what you're talking about, Green." Bobby sighed picking at something on the robe.

"Wait, Green, how do you go from petty thug to contract killer? And if they were professional shooters, like you say, they'd have never told us who they was working with anyway. Even if they got one hell of an ass whipping." Angel asked, calling them out.

"You think you're pretty cute, don't you? He does." Fowler looked over at Green and started walking over to Angel. "Everybody's a smart guy until I bust them in the mouth." he threatened. Angel jumped up, Jack and Sofi tried to grab Angel and Green grabbed Fowler.

"Wait!" Green yelled at them.

"You gonna bust me in my mouth?" Angel growled.

"Hey, hey, hey! Hold on, hold on. This ain't what I'm here for!" Green yelled louder, trying to stop the impending fight.

"The fuck you think this is?" Angel asked Fowler.

"Hey, stop!" I yelled. Everyone looked over at me and Green nodded at me, a silent thank you.

"Look, Bobby, if you got something, you give it to me. And if it's something vital, we will run with this. But don't try and take on Detroit by your damn self. You keep knocking on the devil's door long enough, and sooner or later, somebody gonna answer you." Green said his short speech and left. The room was silent as they left and before anyone could try to crack a joke about the almost fight or Bobby's crude joke, I spoke up.

"Ya know, he's right. You're going to get yourselves killed, acting stupid and all. It's fucking useless to be this way. I don't understand why ya'll can't see that now. And knowing you guys and your luck, you won't realize how much you fucked up until it's too late. Until one of you fucking dies!" I seethed and grabbed my keys. I stormed out the house ignoring the calls from Jack and Angel as I left.

* * *

I tried calling Emilie after she left but she kept hitting the end button. I called Paisley to see if she would check on her, but she was at work apparently. And Bobby was planning on going out again so I couldn't just leave again.

"What bastard hired these guys? West Marine's by the river, right?" Bobby asked Angel, looking at one of the guy's ID.

"Yeah." Angel nodded.

"Come on. Let's go take a look." Bobby said.

"All right." Angel said and stood up. He walked over to the door but was stopped by Sofi.

"Baby." he groaned, knowing what was coming.

"Now, sweetie, wasn't there a discussion about a dinner together? Because I seem to remember spending two hours in the kitchen." she asked him.

"We got some important shit to deal with, baby." Angel told her.

"She's so _la vida loca_." Bobby teased. I leaned against the frame and hid my laugh.

"Man, don't do that right now." Angel pleased, also knowing what was coming if Bobby started.

"Shut up, Bobby. Don't you start with that crap!" Sofi yelled at Bobby.

"Can y'all not go there?" Angel pleaded again.

"That's why you don't get a girlfriend." Bobby told him honestly.

"Don't go there, please." Angel pleaded once more as Sofi's face got redder.

"You know what? I want a girlfriend like you." Bobby joked as Angel held up a hand. As annoying as it was, it was funny as hell, seeing them fight. This house never got boring.

"Can we go?" Bobby asked finally before Sofi opened her mouth again.

"Angel. You said this time was gonna be different." she whined. Bobby sent me an amused glance and I chuckled. He always said this time would be different.

"_Ai mami_, you're breaking _mi Corazon, chica_." Bobby feigned covering his heart. "She's getting real comfortable here, huh? What are you doing? I thought you was a macho man. A tough guy." Bobby asked.

"You know, it's a real shame that little Jackie's the only one down to ride. Let's go, Jackie. Say goodbye to your big sister, Jackie. Let's go." Bobby told me and waved to Angel. He grabbed his coat and headed for the door. I smirked at Angel and followed Bobby.

"You gonna leave me too? I just need 15 minutes, man." Angel sighed as we walked out the door.

"She's addicted to what Angel's dick did." I sang as I closed the door. I followed Bobby out to the car a friend of his let us borrow and got into the passenger seat.

"So Em, was pissed earlier." he stated. I nodded and lit a cigarette. "You stay with her again last night?" he asked. I gave him a weary glance out the corner of my eye and nodded again.

"Yeah, it was late and she offered." I lied. He laughed out loud after that.

"You're kidding me, right?" he asked looking over at me.

"What? You don't think she'd ask me to stay?" I asked offended. He shook his head and laughed still.

"No, not that. Just that you think I don't have the slightest idea of what's going on." he told me. I looked over at him and sighed.

"How'd you guess?" I asked. He hit my arm and pulled over.

"Fairy, I didn't. I asked to see what you'd say. And you fell for it!" he yelled.

'_Damnit.'_ I thought.

"So there is something going on?" he asked seriously.

"Kinda." I sighed. He hit me again and I groaned.

"Stop that." I yelled.

"Then spill." he demanded.

"I don't know. We haven't had time to really talk about it." I told him.

"Why would you need to rush into talking?" he asked curiously. I stayed quiet and he punched me again. "You slept with her didn't you?!" he yelled.

"Maybe, so what?" I confessed, getting annoyed as hell. He pulled back onto the road and glared out the window.

"She's not Lydia, Jack. Nor is she one of your groupies. You can't blow her off or use her for a good lay." he said softly a few minutes later.

"I know, Bobby. That's why I'm trying. She's not like any other girl I've been with. I won't hurt her again. It'll only hurt me too." I assured him. He nodded and kept quiet. He never really was much of a talker. We finally made it to one of the killer's houses and broke our way in.

"Check everything, Jackie. There's gotta be some shit around here that ties these guys to somebody else." Bobby told me as we rummaged through the house. He walked into one room and I walked into another. I lifted the paintings and sifted through drawers looking for anything. A few minutes later Bobby came in with a bag in tow.

"You dicking around in here? You find anything?" he asked flashing the light in my face. I held up the camera I had just found and shrugged my shoulders.

"A camera." I replied.

"Come on." he ordered and I threw the CD's down. We walked back to the car and Bobby drove off.

"You want me to drop you off at her place?" Bobby asked. I sighed and thought for a moment.

"No, I'll let her cool off." I mumbled and looked out the window.

* * *

I laid in bed for what seemed like hours. I came straight home after leaving Jack's house and stayed here all day, ignoring his calls. I didn't want to talk. I wanted to cool off. And by that night I was cooled off and wishing he was here. I tried to go to sleep but I couldn't. It was nearly 2am when I finally gave up. I jumped out of bed, clad in my pajama's, and walked into the living room to get my keys. I slipped my shoes on and headed for my car. The cool wind on my exposed skin made me sprint to my car. Part of me wanted to stay home and let him wonder about me, but the other part wanted to sleep. And without him, that wasn't happening.


	15. I'm Your's

_I drove to the Mercer's house at 2am that night. I just couldn't sleep. I needed him next to me and not even my anger would change that. I slipped my key in the lock and slowly pushed the door open. I looked around and shut it._

"_Anybody awake?" I called out softly, incase someone was up, I didn't want to freak them out and get shot. I didn't hear anyone so I laid my purse on the table. I noticed a big black bag but ignored it. My eye lids were droopy and I needed sleep. Besides, I probably didn't want to know what was in the bag. I walked upstairs and pushed Jack's door open. I smiled when I saw him._

_He was laying on his side, facing the wall, holding a pillow in his arms. I really wanted to be that pillow. I shrugged my jacket off and laid it on his chair. I crawled onto the bed and made my way up. I gently tugged the pillow from his grip and laid it down so I could use it. I lifted his arm up and laid myself where the pillow was. I snuggled back into his chest and sighed when I was comfy. I smiled and finally closed my eyes._

"_Comfy now?" came the muffled voice from behind me. I cursed on the inside and turned to see Jack's green eyes peering at me between his lashes._

"_Yes. You?" I smiled. He smirked and lifted himself up on one elbow._

"_Yeah. What time is it?" he asked. I looked behind him at the clock and sighed._

"_2:25am." I told him._

"_What in God's name are you doing driving around Detroit at 2am?" he asked a little aggravated. I bit my lip and traced one of the tattoo's on his chest._

"_I missed you." I whispered. He sent me a playful glare and tucked a piece of hair behind my ear._

"_You never will let me be mad at you." he mumbled and let his finger run down my jaw. I smiled and leaned in to kiss him. He parted my lips as they met and I let him enter my mouth. A small moan escaped feeling him caress my tongue with his. I ran my fingers through his hair and pulled back slightly._

_I wasn't sure what possessed me to do it or why I thought it needed to be said by me. But I got the sudden urge to ask him what he should have asked me. I got the urge to ask him what I felt was right. Lord, know I wasn't a complete traditional person but damn it, I tried._

"_Be mine?" I whispered. I wasn't going to just spend my nights with him and kiss him, even though I loved every single one, without their being some sort of commitment. I wasn't that type of girl. That was Lydia._

"_Was that a question or a demand?" he asked. I tilted my head and smirked._

"_Does it matter?" I countered. He smirked this time and moved so he was almost on top of me. I thought he was going to kiss me but he started singing._

_Well you done, done me and you bet I felt itI tried to be chill but you're so hot that I meltedI fell right through the cracksAnd now I'm trying to get backBefore the cool done run outI'll be giving it my bestestNothing's going to stop me but divine interventionI reckon it's again my turn to win some or learn someI won't hesitate no more, no moreIt cannot wait, I'm yours_

I smiled as he ran a finger over my lips. His smile broke through his song and he kissed me quickly. He always had a way with words. If he couldn't tell me, he'd sing it._Well open up your mind and see like meOpen up your plans and damn you're freeLook into your heart and you'll find love, love, love, loveListen to the music of the moment people dance and singWe're just one big familyAnd It's our God-forsaken right to be loved love loved love lovedSo I won't hesitate no more, no more It cannot wait I'm sureThere's no need to complicate Our time is shortThis is our fate, I'm yoursScooch on closer dearAnd I will nibble your ear_

I giggled as he gently attacked my neck and ear. I started to wonder if he wrote this or if he just came up with it. He pulled back and kept singing and I hung off of every word._I've been spending way too long checking my tongue in the mirrorAnd bending over backwards just to try to see it clearerMy breath fogged up the glassAnd so I drew a new face and laughedI guess what I be saying is there ain't no better reasonTo rid yourself of vanity and just go with the seasonsIt's what we aim to doOur name is our virtueI won't hesitate no more, no more It cannot wait I'm sureThere's no need to complicate Our time is shortthis is our fate, I'm yoursWell no, no, well open up your mind and see like meOpen up your plans and damn you're freeLook into your heart and you'll find the sky is yoursListen to the music of the moment come and dance with meA lá one big family, A lá happy family, A lá peaceful melodyIt's your God-forsaken right to be loved, love, love, loveI won't hesitate no more, no moreIt cannot wait, I'm sureThere's no need to complicateOur time is shortThis is our fate, I'm yoursNo please, don't complicate Our time is shortThis is our fate, I'm yoursNo please, don't hesitateNo more, no moreIt cannot waitThe sky is your's!_

He finished and kissed my lips again. I held him to me when he went to pull back.

"Thank you." I whispered between kisses. He rolled over the rest of the way on me and settled between my legs.

"Welcome." he mumbled against my skin. I moaned when he sucked on the skin under my ear. I pulled my shoulder up when he didn't stop.

"I'm not your coloring book." I laughed.

BREAK

I woke up to faint knocking on the door. I opened my eyes and saw Angel's head poking in. He scanned the room and smiled when he saw me. I leaned up on my elbows and gave him a sleepy smile.

"Morning." I whispered trying not to wake Jack up, again. Angle sat on the edge of the bed.

"I won't ask why you're in my baby brother's bed." he smirked and I blushed. "I just saw your car and wanted to see if you'd like to come to town with me today?" he asked. I looked over at the clock and it flashed 11:47am.

"Sure. But I gotta stop by my place for clothes." I whispered. He nodded and pointed downstairs and I nodded. I slipped my shoes on and grabbed my jacket. I leaned over the bed and kissed Jack's cheek.

"I'll be back soon." I whispered and kissed his forehead. I was a faint smile cross his lips and walked out. I noticed everyone's doors were closed and walked down stairs. I saw Angle by the door and smiled.

"Why are you up so early?" I joked as he opened the door. He gave me a sad look and I nodded. He wasn't going to say anything here yet. I knew Angel. It was like the time he said he was thinking about going into the Marine's. He didn't want to tell anyone until he thought it out and talked to someone. And now was no different. He had something to say but he didn't want to say it just yet.

"Where are we going?" I asked after we got into my car. "After my place, that is."

"To talk to an old friend of Jerry's." he mumbled. I nodded and drove to my house. I didn't want to press my luck by asking him all these questions but I was one curious cat. 

"What is it, Angel? Tell me." I asked him pulling out of my complex. He sighed and was quiet for a minute.

"Ma's insurance agent came by last night. After you left and after Bobby and Jackie left." he started. "Did you know Jerry was paying for the policy?" he asked.

"I didn't know she had one." I told him shaking my head.

"Well, he's been paying the premium. Well, he came by and said he needed to talk to Jerry. Said that some red flags had been raised. He said it was a big amount for such a small policy. And with Jerry's criminal history and the fact that he's near bankrupt-" 

"Jerry's broke?" I asked shocked. 

"Yeah and guess how much the big amount is?" he asked. I raised my brow and he huffed. "400,000"

"What?!" I shrieked. He nodded and pointed to a construction site.

"Turn here." he said and I obeyed. I parked and saw a bunch of guys getting paid. Angle hopped out and walked over to the man paying them and I followed him slowly. I didn't know what he wanted me to hear or know, so I kept my distance.

"Big Chief." Angel greeted. 

"Angel Mercer." the man smiled and shook his hands. 

"How you doing?" Angel asked, making pleasantries. 

"Good. And you?" he asked. Angle nodded and looked over at me.

"As well as expected. This is Emilie, a friend of mine." Angel introduced me. I walked over to shake his hand and he kissed it.

"Finally, got rid of Sofi?" the man joked. I laughed and Angel sighed.

"Nah, this is Jackie's girl." Angel winked at me. I blushed and watched the guy nodded his approval and Angle got down to business. "I came to talk to you about Jerry. You worked with him lately?"

"I ain't worked for Jerry for a long time. Not since he started up those luxury condos. High-dollar stuff like that brings in all the gangsters." the man told us, walking to the outside of the house.

"Wait a second. So you're saying Jerry got mixed in with some gangsters? What's going on?" Angle asked, even more confused than before. The man sighed and leaned closer to us.

"There's this do-gooder. He's on city council. His name's Douglas." he told us.

"Okay." Angel nodded.

"He's the guy who shut down Jerry's warehouse project. He'll know who Jerry got mixed up with." was all he said. I looked at Angel and we walked back to my car. Everyday this got worse. But Jerry was involved?

BREAK

I woke up the next morning, or should I say afternoon, and reached for Emilie but she wasn't there. My eyes shot open and I looked around. I thought for a moment and I vaguely remember her leaving this morning. When and where she went, I didn't know. But I did remember her leaving. I looked at the clock and it flashed 2:13pm. God, I slept late. I groaned and sat up on the edge of my bed. It wasn't a second later when Bobby was banging on my door.

"Jackie! Wake your fairy ass up!" he yelled through my door. I sighed and stood up. I walked over to my closet and pulled out a shirt to slip over my white one. I pulled a pair of jeans on and walked downstairs. The first thing that hit me was the smell of Sofi cooking. Lord knows I can't stand her, but she can cook. The next thing I noticed was the kitchen table. It was covered in guns. And, of course, Bobby was standing over them.

"Get over here. I wanna show you these." he said and slid a cup of orange juice over to me. I walked over and watched him look over the guns and tell me what they were and how powerful they were. Yes, In the Mercer house this is what brothers talk about. Guns. And no, we don't point them out in books or on tv, we have our own little stolen stash on our mother's dining table. Welcome home.

"SIG Sauer .45 auto." he mumbled holding up the first gun. "That'll blow your back out." 

"Nine millimeter Beretta." he muttered and pushed it aside. "Oh, look at this Beretta. It's triple-action. Three bullets at once." he said, sounding eerily excited while opening the barrel and looking at it.

"They say dead men tell no tales, but they sure leave important shit lying around." he said picking up another gun and quickly pointing it into the living room. I looked and saw Jerry walk in. 

"Hey, what the hell are y'all doing now?" he asked looking around.

"Just getting a head start on next year's taxes, Jerry." Bobby told him.

"Look how y'all doing Mama's house." Jerry sighed looking at the mess in the living room. "Come on. Look at this table, man. Come on." 

"You know what? You're right." Bobby nodded and turned around to look at Sofi in the kitchen. "Hey, Sofi, why don't you do me a favor and clean up some of this shit?" he said waving the gun around. "Make yourself useful." I was about to laugh until Bobby ducked and a plate came flying into the dining room.

"You missed." he snickered. I picked up the camera I found last night and flipped through the photos. I sighed when I saw some of mom.

"Hey, Bobby." I called and handed him the camera.

"Where'd y'all get this?" Jerry asked.

"Our friend Stanly, the shooter." Bobby told him looking through the photos.

"Let me see that." Jerry said and grabbed the camera.

"They were tracking Mom." Bobby told him and took the camera back.

"That's that guy. That's that lawyer guy." I said pointing to the picture of Ma and the lawyer on the screen. "That shit head said he said he only met her once, Bobby." 

Jerry got a dumbfounded look on his face and I heard the door shutting. Bobby and me looked back to see Emilie and Angle walk in. 

"Where the hell you been?" Bobby asked Angel. "I been trying to call you all day."

"Following up new leads." Angel said lowly and sent a hard stare to Jerry. I didn't pay much attention though, Emilie was back. She gave me a sad smile and I kissed her head. She pulled me over to the stairwell and I thought she was going to talk but she didn't. Instead she wrapped her arms around my neck and crashed her lips onto mine. I leaned her against the wall and kissed her back softly. I knew something was wrong but I knew I couldn't ask now. Any minute Bobby would be yelling for us to go somewhere else. 

"You okay?" I asked when she finally let me go. She nodded and gave me one last kiss on my lips. "Bobby knows." I whispered.

"What?! How?" she asked. I smirked and rubbed my ear.

"I kinda slipped. Well, he tricked me but he knows. He's cool though." I told her quickly. 

"I think Angel knows. He just doesn't want to see it yet." she smiled. I nodded and gave her a quick kiss before leading her back into the dining room where Sofi and Angel were about to argue again.

"What?" he asked as Sofi grabbed his arm.

"You're gonna leave again?" she asked. Angel huffed and glared at her.

"See that's your problem." he mumbled as she pushed him.

"Okay, fine. Go. Go." she spat and kept pushing him.

"You gonna be here." he mumbled and walked out the door.

"Whatever." she huffed and walked past us. I looked at Emilie and smiled.

"Good luck." I wished her and she pinched my arm.

"Be careful." she whispered and leaned up to kiss me again. I nodded and hurried out the door after my brothers. I jumped in the seat behind Jerry and noticed all of them staring at me.

"What?" I asked. Bobby smirked while Jerry shook his, chuckling softly. Angel just glared at me. I held my hands up in defense and looked out the window.

"At least I got a good girl." I mumbled, earning a punch from Angel and more laughs from the other two.

"And a sane one." Bobby added. 

BREAK

I walked into the living room and was about to sit down when Sofi appeared at the doorway. She stared at me for a minute and I finally looked over.

"What?" I asked as nicely as I could. 

"You're just going to let him leave?" she asked, crossing her arms.

"Angel is his own man, Sofi." I sighed.

"Not Angel. Jack?" she asked. I looked at her confused.

"Why would I care?" I asked.

"He's your boyfriend. And don't say no he's not because I'm not that stupid Emilie." she told me flatly. I stared at her for a second and sighed.

"It's there mother, Sofi. Whether I want any of them to go or not, they won't listen. You should know that by now." I told her. She nodded and walked over to sit next to me.

"But we can stop them." she said excitedly. I raised my brow and looked at her.

"How do you reckon we do that?" I asked, curious to what she'd say.

"Maybe if the cops gave them another warning. Maybe they would stop." she smiled. I wanted to laugh so bad but I contained it.

"You wanna call the cops on them?" I asked incredulously, no wonder they call her la vida loca. She jumped up, pulling me with her and ran to the door.

"Yeah, yeah. Come on!" she yelled and bolted out the door. I watched her jump into her car and I smirked.

"Bobby is going to have a field day." 

BREAK

The whole way Angel shot me glares and I started to find it amusing. He was my brother but he was pulling it for Emilie. I found it kind of ironic. We pulled up to the lawyer's house and I nodded my head.

"Nice place." I whispered as we walked around to the back.

"We might have to spend the night up in this bitch." Bobby joked cracking the back window and reaching in for the door knob.

"An attack dog." he said and looked a the tiny white ball of fur on floor. "Come here, poochie. You don't wanna bite me, do you? You gonna bite me, baby?" Bobby cooed to the dog. I shook my head as we all spilt up to look over the house. I was a laptop on a desk and walked over to it. He was a lawyer so this must be important to him. 

"Hey, Bobby, check this out. I found Bradford's calendar." I said pulling up his calendar. "You don't think ''EM'' stands for Evelyn Mercer, do you?" I asked them as they crowded around me.

"You're getting good at this, Jackie." Bobby mumbled, still holding the dog.

"November 21st. He met up with her the night she died. Why would anybody meet up with their lawyer at 8 at night?" Angel asked. All of a sudden a loud and shrill voice filled the quiet night and I snapped the laptop shut.

"Angel!" Sofi yelled from outside, honking the horn. 

"Nice. Your girlfriend's here." Bobby said waving his hand around. I gave Angel a dirty look and Jerry dropped his head. This was great.

"She's crazy, man." Angel mumbled looking out the window at his girlfriend honking the horn.

"Well, go shut her up then." I yelled at him.

"Angel! Angel, come out! I see you in the window! Come out, you idiot! I know you're in there!" she yelled. 

"Y'all come out here with me. This girl is crazy." Angel told us and we followed him outside.

"Angel! People, there's robbers in the house! Come out, Angel! I'm gonna call the police now!" she kept yelling to the neighborhood and honking her horn. We walked outside and Angel ran over to her. I didn't know until then that Emilie was there. She was us walk out and she got out the car. At first, I thought she was on Sofi's side but the big shit eating grin spread across her face and I knew.

"Come on!" Angel yelled at her. We were all pooled around Sofi to get her back in her car that we didn't notice the lawyer driving up.

"You better call immigration on this girl." Emilie told us.

"You've got a real class act here." Bobby told Angel. Oh, he was in for it.

"She should be at Guantanamo Bay." Jerry sighed.

"Locked up." I added in. 

"Oh, my god." Emilie gasped. I saw her face pale and looked behind me. It was Mr. Bradford.

"Excuse me. What are you doing?" he asked looking out his car window. Bobby walked over to him and Jerry followed, trying to keep him in check.

"How you doing, buddy?" Bobby hissed and reached into the car.

"Bobby! Bobby! He's a lawyer!" Jerry yelled.

"What's going on here?" the lawyer asked.

"He's a liar, Jerry!" Bobby yelled and threw the old man on the ground. Angel was finally finishing up with Sofi.

"Ain't nobody's business! Stay away!" He yelled at her.

"You heard me, old man. You fucking lied to me." Bobby yelled pulling the lawyers sweater over his face, showing his stomach. "You said you didn't even know my mother. You were the last person to see her alive." he yelled and smacked his stomach.

"Look at that, Jerry. It leaves a nice big red handprint, huh?" Bobby smiled at his handy work, literally.

"Just ask him the question. Come on." Jerry said pointing to him. 

"No, I'm gonna do it again-" he paused to slap him again. "and again until I find out what I wanna know." he yelled. Angel walked over and reached over Bobby's shoulder to smack him once.

"Oh, God!" he cried. Emilie gripped my hand and looked at me nervously. I rubbed her hand with my thumb and pulled her to me. I really wish she didn't have to see us like this.

"Tell him!" Angel yelled.

"Okay." he whimpered and pulled his sweater off his face. "Okay, I'll explain. It's just that I-I-I felt so guilty." he stuttered.

"Guilty for what?" Jerry asked.

"I-I-I'm not even sure I know how to say it." Bradford said looking around at all of us.

"Say what?" Bobby demanded.

"Your mother and I were-Were seeing each other socially." he finally spit out.

"Socially?" Bobby asked confused.

"I didn't want to sully your mother's reputation." he trailed off as Bobby helped him up. It was one big misunderstanding. "She was a fine, fine woman." he complimented.

"I know. I know." Bobby sighed.

"I have some of your mother's night things, if you want." he started as Bobby helped wipe his coat off.

"What?!" Bobby asked and stopped.

"They-" Bradford started again.

"No. No, it's not necessary." Bobby said hurriedly. He, like the rest of us, did not want to hear about our mother's night things.

"Too much information. Ah!" Jerry said disgusted as we all started back to the cars.

"I apologize, Mr. Bradford. We broke your back window. We're just trying to figure out what happened my mother." Bobby told him.

"I understand." Bradford nodded.

"Thank you. I appreciate that. You have a beautiful home here." Bobby told him and walked off.

"Thank you." he mumbled. Sofi and Angel went in her car back to the house while Emilie rode with me, Bobby and Jerry.

"She's crazy!" Bobby exclaimed, driving down the road

"No shit Sherlock, where'd you get your first clue?" Emilie quipped. Bobby gave her a tiny glare in the mirror.

"Now why did you let her come here?" Jerry asked. I watched her smirk and looked at Bobby.

"I just wanted to piss Bobby off." she told us. Bobby laughed and shook his head.

"Mission accomplished, Diddle." he told her.

BREAK

We got back to the house and every piled into their rooms. Jack looked over at me and smiled.

"You going home?" he asked me. I shook my head and walked over to sit next to him.

"Nah, I'm too tired to drive. I think I'll stay here. That okay?" I asked, smiling up at him. He grinned and leaned down to kiss me.

"I wouldn't have it any other way." he whispered. I met his lips in a hot kiss and trailed my fingers down his chest to the hem of his shirt. He pulled away so I could pull it off and quickly moved back to me. He held my hips firmly and slowly moved his hands up, along with my shirt. I sighed against his lips as I felt my skin being uncovered by my shirt but being replaced with his skin. He stopped when it was under my bra and trailed his hand back down my stomach. My whole body ached to feel him as his hand found its way down the front of my panties. His lips were attached to my neck as he slipped two fingers inside me. I moaned and he moved his lips over mine. He moved his fingers faster and harder and I moaned into his mouth. My fingers curled around his hair and pulled it slightly. I smirked when he let out a moan.

'_So Jackie likes pain.'_

I pulled it tighter and his fingers moved quicker. I felt his thumb come over me and start to rub slow circles, urging me even further. He kissed me with such passion and hunger I almost didn't feel the tingling in my stomach until the last minute. My toes curled, my breath caught and Jack held me tight, lisp pressed against mine, as my orgasm spilled over. When my body stopped trembling he removed his lips from mine and looked down at me. I smirked and pushed him over on his back. I kissed him as my hands went to work on his pants. I pulled them off and then let mine slid down my legs. I was wanting to take control but that was looking like it wasn't going to happen. Jack pulled my legs from under me and I fell, on my back, onto the bed. He crawled between my legs and smirked at me. I lifted his chin up and kissed him.

I closed my eyes when I felt him rub against my opening. He attacked my neck and roughly thrust into me. Our first time was, of course, a loving tender one. But this time was the opposite. I had never seen Jack this way, not that it was bad. But he had always been gentle with me. I knew he was more experienced than me but I never knew it to this extent. But, don't get me wrong, I'm so not complaining.

His mouth covered mine again when I couldn't silence my moans. The last thing we wanted was for Angel to Bobby to hear us. They'd kill Jack and well, I'd just be embarrassed. I ran my nails down his back and felt him press himself to me more. I snaked a leg further over his waist and pulled him in deeper. It wasn't too much longer when I felt my second orgasm close in on me. This one strong and longer than the first. And Jack was right behind me with his.

He pulled out of me and slid onto the bed next to me. I rolled over onto my side and laid my head on his chest. My hair sticking to his moist chest. We laid there in silence until we caught our breath.

"Emilie?" he whispered. I looked up at him and he ran a finger over my nose. "I love you."

My heart stopped. Did he just say what I think he did? 

I looked at him again and looked into his eyes. There was no joke, no hurt in them. There was love and care. And the longer I stayed quiet the amount of embarrassment grew. I leaned up and kissed his lips softly.

"I love you too, Jackie." I whispered.


	16. Even After Death

**Thanks for the reviews! I got ahead on this story, I have the next two chapters done...lol. But it was worth it. Now it's just the question of _'To kill or not to kill Jack.'_ ;) Thanks!!**

* * *

I woke up the next morning, after Jack had gone to get in the shower, and smiled at the ceiling. Last night was utterly amazing. He sang to me, he told me he loved me and he gave me a night I'd never forget. Everything felt like it was falling into place again. It's just the only thing shadowing that was the whole drama over Evelyn's death. I knew why they wanted to find her killer. Especially, since they found out it was planned. I totally understood that. What I didn't like, though, was them going out every night chasing down bad guys with guns and knives. They could get killed and I often wondered if they knew that or not. And if they did, why they didn't think of how everyone else would react if the died. Leave it to bunch of men to not think things through and go out to get themselves killed.

I crawled out of bed and grabbed a pair of Jack's pajama bottoms. I rolled the top hem down a few times to get them to stay on and opened the door. I smiled when Angel opened his door and gave me a tiny glare.

"Morning, Angel." I grinned and he shook his head. He walked in front of me to the bathroom and held his hand up at me.

"Stay there. Bobby's on the toilet." he warned me. I furrowed my brow at that. Wasn't Jack in the shower? Angel stood in the doorway and I leaned on the wall outside of the bathroom.

"Hey, Bobby." Angel called to him.

"Yo." was the low reply from Bobby. This was gross; they used the bathroom, talked and took showers with the door open.

"Hey, man. I gotta ask you a question." Angle said and cast a worried look my way. I rolled my eyes and pinched his arm.

"What's up?" Bobby asked. Angel looked over at me and took one more step into the bathroom.

"You know me and Sofi did a lot of making up last night." he started. I rolled my eyes and leaned my head back onto the wall. I wish they'd hurry. I need to brush my teeth.

"You gave her that ring, huh?" Bobby asked and Angel chuckled.

"Gross!" I yelled.

"Yeah. But it seem like I got a little rust on the tools down here." Angel mumbled slowly. Even though he was in the bathroom I could see him undo his robe.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa." Bobby exclaimed as I laughed to myself. Guess their not that close. "Ask the cockologist in the shower, man."

"Watch it, Bobby!" I warned.

"Thanks, Em. How the hell would I know, Bobby?" Jack asked from the shower.

"You're the expert." Bobby told him.

"Bobby!" I yelled again. I heard all three snickers and then the shower curtain move.

"Rug burn." Jack said after a moment of silence.

"You're gonna live." Bobby declared.

"Thank God, man. I thought my luck ran out." Angel sighed and tied his robe back. He looked over at me and nodded. "Hey, listen, man. You know, Jerry ain't been straight up with us about that redevelopment project. Found out his dream's dead. Jerry got involved with some bad people. City got on him about fraud and whatnot. Cut his loans off like a month ago." he explained. I didn't hear anything for a second and turned my head to the door to speak.

"Technically, Jerry's really broke." I clarified for Bobby. I heard the paper crumple and Bobby's chuckle.

"Thank you, Diddle." he laughed. "You think this had something to do with what happened to Mom?" he asked Angel.

"No, I'm saying that it's something that we should look into. I need y'all to go down and visit this city official named Douglas. He'll know who Jerry got mixed up with. I'm gonna go check on some other shit." Angel told him.

"What are you talking about? Why don't you just tell me what you know, Angel?" Bobby asked, sounding annoyed.

"I know you need to stay your ass on that porcelain. This is gonna require a little finesse. And given your prior reputation as a hothead-" Angel told him and Bobby yelled in the middle/

"I wrote the fucking book on finesse." he yelled.

"-you gonna be the first to fuck up." Angel finished. I heard the shower stop and smiled. Angel glared at me as he walked by and I gave him a sweet smile.

"I'm gonna kill him." he muttered as he walked into his room.

"Wait for me to wipe my ass, Angel." Bobby yelled. "I'm coming with you. Angel! Get me some fucking toilet paper, Jack." he yelled. I laughed and smirked when Jack left the bathroom in a red towel. He grinned at me and grabbed my hips.

"Morning." he whispered as he pushed me backwards to his room. He reached behind me to open the door and pushed it open. He kicked it closed with his foot and pushed me onto the bed. I grabbed the towel as I fell and he smirked.

"Good morning." I smiled. I grabbed his wrist and pulled him down on top of me, our lips meeting immediately. I felt his hands move to my bottoms and that's when he pulled back.

"Hey, those are mine." he stated. I rolled my eyes and nodded.

"Yes, they are. Would you like them back?" I asked sweetly. He was about to open his mouth when a knock came at the door.

"No need for you two to make up! Diddle, stay dressed. Fairy, get dressed. Now!" Bobby yelled. I dropped back onto his bed and pulled a pillow over my face. I let out a scream and heard Jack laughing. I looked from underneath the pillow and frowned when he was dressed.

"We need to stay at my place from now on." I told him seriously. He chuckled and sat on the bed to put his shoes one.

"We can arrange that." he smiled. "You want to come with us? You won't be in harm's way, I swear." he asked. I pouted and shook my head.

"I can't. I have a final today. I put it off as long as I could but winter break is coming up and if I want to get classes for next semester, I gotta take it today. Plus, I gotta do a few errands." I told him and he nodded. I moved to sit on his straddle his legs and snaked my arms around his neck.

"But you can come by my place when you get done." I smiled.

"Really?" he asked.

"Yes, but bring some clothes. I just might keep you." I winked and leaned down to kiss his lips.

"I can live with that." he whispered as he pulled back. I slid off his legs and pulled him up. He gave me a quick hug and pulled back.

"I'll see you tonight." he smiled as he walked out.

* * *

We drove to the parking garage outside of city hall and waited. We broke the back window of his car and poured gas all over it. Bobby had a thing for gas and fires. We waited off to the side so he wouldn't see us at first.

"So you and Emilie, huh?" he asked. I smirked and nodded.

"Yeah, me and Emilie." I confirmed. I looked over at him as he smirked.

"Angel's gonna kill you." he told me.

"Thanks, Bobby." I laughed. I heard a door open and we looked around the corner.

"There he is." Bobby mumbled. We walked from our spot and rushed to get to him before he got to his car.

"Councilman Douglas." Bobby greeted as we stepped in front of him. "Sorry to startle you. My name's Bobby Mercer. I believe you know my brother, Jeremiah? Apparently, you were the one who got his business shut down, right?" he asked, not wasting time.

"This is not the proper venue for an appeal." Douglas told us and started to walk away.

"Look, we're not really concerned with that, councilman." Bobby said, as we closed the gap between us so he wouldn't go. "I heard my brother got mixed up with some hoodlums. You know what I'm talking about?" he asked.

"I can't help you. Excuse me." he said and walked away. We smirked watching him walk to his car, not even noticing the broken window or smelling the gas at first. We didn't move until he froze and smelled his seats.

"Councilman!" Bobby yelled pouring gas on the hood of his car. "Now I gotta light your ass on fire! All I wanted was a name! You're gonna make me turn your ass into the black gingerbread man now!" he yelled. I leaned down to look in his window and lit a cigarette.

"It's all right. I'll have my little brother here suck your burning dick." he yelled after throwing the gas can down. "Give me the fucking cigarette." he said and snatched it from my fingers.

"Roll down the window." he demanded and held the cigarette out to the car. He reluctantly rolled his window down.

"Victor. Victor Sweet." he told us.

"What about him?" Bobby asked. We waited patiently as he started to spill on his boss.

* * *

By the time I had brushed my teeth, using Jack's tooth brush, and gathered my clothes, angel was already gone. I made sure to leave quick incase Sofi woke up and wanted to harass me. It felt weird going back to school even though it was for one class. They had given me a few days off for personal reasons and then it was already Thanksgiving holidays so it wasn't too big of a deal. But I missed one final test and I needed to take it before the rest of our winter break or I'd have to take it over again.

"Hello, Miss. Ravin. How are you doing?" Mr. Roberts asked as I walked in the near empty classroom.

"I'm fine. Thanks." I smiled and took a seat up front. I looked around and saw a few people from my class but none that I talked to. I looked at the clock and sighed. 12:32. I needed to get this done.

"Okay you are here to take or re-take the Advanced Adult Psychology Final. Some of you failed and some of you missed it for other reasons." he told us and picked up the stack of papers.

"You have an hour to finish." he said and started passing them out. "When you finish bring it up to me and you may leave. They will be graded sometime next week. I will either e-mail you your results or mail them out." he said and gave me the last stack.

"Now eyes on your own paper and-" he looked at the clock. "Begin. Time's up at 1:45"

I sighed and opened the first page. I was afraid I wouldn't remember anything because I hadn't been studying and honestly, almost forgot about school. The only thing that had been on my mind was Jack and all the things surrounding Evelyn. But my I guess I was just underestimating myself. The answers came to me easily and when I set my pen down I still had 35 minutes left. I smiled and handed my paper to Mr. Roberts.

"Thank you. You'll get them as soon as I grade them." he smiled. "I'm sorry about Evelyn. Is there anything I can do?" he asked.

"Pass me? It would make her happy." I joked to show him I was doing okay. He understood and laughed.

"I'm glad you're okay. I'll see you around campus, Emilie." he smiled and I walked out. I pulled my keys out and got into my car. I sat down and let my mind drift to the tiny piece of paper in the cup holder. I hadn't forgotten about it but whatever it was, it was big. And right now I didn't need anymore surprises. But my curiosity was getting the best of me as I pulled into the police station.

"Yes, can I help you?" the lady at the desk smiled. I walked over to her and looked around.

"I was wondering if Detective Green was here." I asked. She smiled and pointed behind me. I turned to see him walking over to me.

"Emilie, how are you?" he smiled. I smiled back and nodded.

"Pretty good. Caught up on some school today." I told him trying to act casual.

"Those Mercer boys staying outta trouble?" he asked, grinning.

"Only in my dreams, Green." I laughed.

"What is it, Emilie?" he asked getting serious.

"I need a favor." I started and before I could say more he lead me over to a corner cubicle and sat me down.

"Right after Evelyn died we went to her lawyer's office. He had a few papers for the boys and she had one paper for me." I told him. "Mr. Bradford said it was a big surprise that Evelyn was waiting to give me. But it's just an address." I said and handed him the address. He looked at it and nodded.

"Want me to look it up for an owner? See if that helps?" he asked. I let out a breath and smiled.

"Yes, please." I nodded and he logged onto the computer. He typed it in and got its information.

"It's owned by a Clarence Morgan. No word on if it's rented or what. Said it's been his for six years now. You know that name?" he asked me.

"No. I don't recall it." I sighed.

"Do you even know anyone is Salem?" he asked.

"I used to live there before Evelyn got me. I lived all over Massachusetts." I smiled.

"I almost forgot you weren't from here. You fit in quite snuggly." he smiled. "Think it could be someone from your past or that knew Abigail?" he asked.

"Maybe." I shrugged.

"You gonna find out soon?" he asked, leaning back in his chair.

"I might. I'm a little nervous on what it could be." I confessed.

"You want me to do some digging? Find out who lives there?" he offered.

"No, I'll see for myself. Not sure when but I will." I smiled as a man walked up holding a video tape.

"Here's the tape you asked for." he told Green. Green looked at me and took the tape.

"Did you know anything about Jerry's financial situation?" he asked me. I felt my heart race.

"No, what's wrong?" I lied. He sighed and put in the tape.

"Apparently, he was having some issues and Evelyn found out. Filed a report against some people but I never knew about it." he told me.

"You think this has something to do with her murder, don't you?" I asked. He smirked and looked around.

"I know you know more than I do. But it might." he told me. He pushed play on the tape and fast forwarded it.

"There she is." I pointed to the screen. He paused it and looked closer.

"So she got in there at 6:05pm." he mumbled and nodded to me. "Fast-forward that." he asked.

"Hey, look. That's Fowler." I told him and he looked up.

"Wait, pause it, pause it." he said and I paused it. "He didn't say anything to me about talking to her." he said looking at me.

"Fast-forward to when she leaves." he asked. "Okay, stop." he said and I looked at the time.

"So she was here until 7: 11pm." he mumbled looking behind him at Fowler/

"He spent more than an hour with her." I told him. "Why wouldn't he tell you that?" I asked.

"I don't know, Emilie." he said, sounding a little antsy now. "Listen; do me a favor, okay?"

"Yeah." I nodded.

"Stay at your place as much as possible. Stay away from the Mercer's house. Stay out of the loop as much as possible, okay? And don't tell anyone about this." he told me.

"Okay." I nodded. "This is getting bad, huh?" I asked, getting scared. He pinched my chin and smiled.

"No need to be scared. You got me and Mercer's looking over your shoulder. Just stay low and try to get the boys to do the same." he told me.

"Okay. Thank you." I whispered.

* * *

Not too long after the councilman spilled, Angel was calling saying he had something. We were already heading home but he asked us to meet him at the bowling alley. It kind of ticked me off because I wanted to go see Emilie but it was only 2pm so I had all day.

"What do you think he found?" I asked Bobby as we walked through the bowling alley parking lot.

"I don't know, but it's something big." he told me quickly.

"How can you tell?" I asked him. He sent me a glare out the corner of his eye.

"By the sound of his voice. I know my brother." he told me simply and we walked into the building.

"What's going on, Angel?" Bobby asked as we took a seat next to him at the bar. We ordered a beer each and looked at Angel.

"Was that councilman helpful?" He asked sipping his beer.

"Oh, yeah. A real public servant. You remember a punk named Victor Sweet?" Bobby asked.

"I remember a Malcolm Sweet." Angel said.

"Victor was his nephew. Used to deliver things for his uncle. Like firebombs and beatings. You remember. Malcolm used to love to humiliate him all the time." Bobby reminded him more.

"Yeah, I remember that dude." Angel nodded.

"Apparently, little Victor got sick of the ass-whippings and sunk his uncle into the river. He owns the whole neighborhood now." Bobby explained.

"No shit?" Angel asked and shook his head. He looked down for a minute and then back at us. "Hey, Bobby. Word around town is that Jerry owed a lot of people some money." he started.

"What are you talking about?" Bobby asked as I leaned in closer to hear.

"Recognize that dude over there with the fat head?" Angel asked pointing to guy with a few kids by a lane.

"Yeah, that's Evander Pearson." Bobby nodded. "He used to be all right, that guy. Jerry and him used to hang during the union days." he recalled.

"He goes by Evan now. And he's working for a guy named Victor." Angel told us.

"You guys are coming up with this pretty quick." I sighed.

"Yeah, we should have been cops. What are we doing here, Angel?" Bobby asked getting annoyed now. I looked back over to Evan and my mouth nearly dropped.

"Holy shit." I gasped and my brothers turned to see what I saw.

"I found out Jerry got a big insurance check for Mom's death." Angel said looking away. I watched as Jerry talked to Even for a few minutes and then casually slipped him a manila envelope.

"Forget Jerry. We're gonna find him later. Come on." Bobby growled and started towards Evan and his family.

"Yo, Evander! What's up?" Bobby called out walking up to him. Evan looked startled and started to gather his family up.

"Muriel! We leaving. Game's over. Let's go. Put your jacket on. It's time to go." he ordered. "It's nice to see you, boys, but we was just leaving." he told us quickly.

"You ain't going nowhere. What was you talking to Jerry about?" Bobby demanded.

"Nothing. Just saying hello. Me and Jerry go way back from the union days. You know that, Bobby." he lied. I shook my head and looked around. In the middle of a freaking bowling alley, great.

"Angel tells me you're one of Victor Sweet's boys now. Hear he's running shit like his uncle. Treating you like a house bitch." Bobby smirked.

_(A/N I don't use and will not use the 'N' word. It's not me. So I changed that word.)_

"What are you thinking about, Evan? The dude's a punk." Angel scolded.

"You been gone a long time, fellas. Times change." Evan tried to explain.

"What's in that envelope?" Bobby asked.

"What envelope?" Evan asked. Yeah, play stupid and piss Bobby off more.

"You wanna play that fucking game with me right now?" Bobby growled.

"Y'all gonna do this here?" Evan asked looking around.

"Right here. Right now." Bobby told him, standing his ground.

"Give me the envelope and take a walk. Now!" Angel demanded.

"Go ahead, Evander." Bobby nodded. Evan reluctantly passed the envelope to Angel.

"Take the kids home. We'll see your ass again real soon." Bobby told Evan. "Let's go."

We walked to the car in silence and it was like that until we pulled into Jerry's neighborhood. We had already looked in the envelope and counted 20,000. I was ticked off because I couldn't go to Emilie's earlier but now it seemed like my own brother was paying gangsters. The same gangster's who killed our mother. This just kept getting better and better.

"I ain't playing no more." Bobby spoke up, looking at Jerry's house. "I'm gonna go in there and bust that melon and find out what he's thinking." he threatened and opened the car door.

"Whoa, hey!" Angel yelled and grabbed his arm.

"His family's in there." I told him.

"I don't give a shit, man." Bobby yelled and gripped the wheel.

"You're gonna have to calm down." Angel told him, trying like me to keep him I the car.

"Oh, I'm calm. I'm calm." he breathed.

"Let me just call him." Angel sighed picking his phone up.

"He thinks I'm an idiot. He thinks I don't know what the fuck is going on." Bobby vented and I shook my head.

"Jerry." Angel called into the phone. "It's Angel. Look, man. We need to meet up first thing tomorrow at Mom's house." Angle spoke into the receiver.

"I'm gonna kill him." Bobby spoke again.

"Calm down, Bobby." I repeated and leaned into the back seat.

"We still family, right?" Angel asked. "Yeah, man. Okay." he finished and hung up.

"Is he coming?" Bobby asked.

"Yeah." Angel nodded and looked out the window.

"Good." Bobby muttered and drove off.

"Drop my off at Emilie's." I told him before we turned to go to our house. They looked at me from the front and I sighed. "Just do it."

"Why?" Bobby asked still pissed.

"Because I want to think and cool off and there is no way I can do that with you two storming around all night. And I might want to spend one last normal night before my whole family finishes falling apart, okay?" I yelled at them. They looked away from the mirror and hushed. We drove a few minutes and Bobby nodded.

"Okay." he told me softly. I nodded and leaned against the window as we drove to her apartment.

* * *

I finally made my way back to my place around 8pm that night. I was tired. The test and then the whole Fowler thing got me worked up so I met Paisley for a late movie and a walk around the park. I pulled into my parking space and wondered if Jack was here.

"Jack?" I called into the seemingly empty apartment. I frowned when I didn't get a response and set my purse and books down. I shrugged my jacket off and walked to my room. It was then that I smiled. I heard the shower running in my bathroom and slipped out of my shoes. I peeled my shirt and pants off after that and slowly creeped my way into the bathroom. I bit my lip seeing him through the glass door of the shower. I slowly opened the door and thanked god he had music on so he didn't hear it open. I slid inside the shower and closed the door behind me.

I snuck my hands around his waist and pressed a kiss to his back. He stopped rinsing his hair and grabbed my hands. He pulled me around him and looked down at me. I thought he was going to kiss me but instead he pulled me into his chest. I wrapped my arms around him again kissed his chest as he ran his fingers through my hair. He lifted my chin up to look at him and I smiled. This time he kissed me.

I never knew kiss could get better but it did. The water wetting our lips made them move even more gracefully than any other time. Our tongues dancing as he pushed me against the wall of the shower. My hands slid down his slick chest and he pulled me up to wrap around his waist. And as if I didn't know it before, the shower proved me right as he slid himself into me. He fit perfectly, filling every inch of me. It was then I knew I could be with him forever. Not because of the sex. But because he completed me in every way. He made me whole again. After all the torment life had put me through, he made me whole. He put me back together when I thought it couldn't be done.

After our shower we found ourselves in the kitchen.

"What are you making?" he asked from the table.

"Smothered chicken. My mom used to make it." I told him. He smiled and nodded. I finished dinner and set his plate in front of him.

"Hummm, looks good, babe." he mumbled as he cut into the chicken.

"So what happened today?" I asked him as we ate.

"Not much." he said shortly. I looked at him and he sent me a sad smile. "I don't wanna talk about it. That's mainly why I wanted to come over here." he told me.

"Oh so it wasn't to see me?" I teased. He laughed and picked up my plate as he took his to the sink. He set them down and walked back over to pull me out my seat.

"I came over here to get away from the tension at the house, yes. But I also came over here to spend time with the most beautiful girl in Boston." he smirked down at me. I touched his nose with mine and smiled.

"Suck up." I whispered and kissed his lips softly. He leaned his forehead on mine and was silent of a minute.

"It's getting bad, Emilie." he whispered. I nodded and looked at him.

"I know. I can feel it. I can feel something bad, Jack." I cried and rubbed his cheek with my thumb. "I'm scared. It's all got out of control."

"I know." he whispered. "But it'll be okay. I promise."

"Promise you'll never leave me." I asked him. He kissed my eyes and pulled me into his arms once again.

"I promise I'll never leave you." he told me. "I promise that I will love you forever. Even after death."

"I love you too, Jack." I whispered and opened my eyes to look I his. "Even after death, I'll never stop."


	17. Dancing

**Thanks for the reviews! I've had people bugging me for this chapter for a few days now on the other site I post on. So here it is. The infamous shoot out scene. Enjoy! :)**

**BEG75 - First, I win 20 from you, now you wanna send me cookies and brownies, you reall know how to bargain, huh?! LOL I'm glad you liked it. And yes, you have been causing a few tears, well a lot of tears lately. **

**SexySadie88 - But you have to admit, Garrett did a good job dying in the movie...lol. But we'll see...Thanks for reviewing! :)**

**lemmonpie - I find it so gross to see that they do that but at the same time it shows how close they are and shows they really see each other as brothers. I think that is one of the best scenes like family wise even though it is weird...lol.**

* * *

I was afraid of what was going to happen when we got to Jack's house. I tossed and turned all night, even though Jack was right there. Something about the way he told me he loved me last didn't settle. Something big was going down this morning and I was afraid.

Everyone was silent as we walked into the Mercer's living room. Sofi was sitting quietly in the kitchen and Angel was seated in the sofa. I wasn't sure why I was here but Jack said Bobby wanted all family here, and that included me. And seeing Sofi keeping out the way made me feel worse. Usually, she'd butt in about how she's part of the family too. But today she was distancing herself. Jack pulled me over to the couch and we sat in silence. I looked over when the door opened and we all watched Jerry walk in.

"What?" he asked pulling off his gloves.

"You know what you did." Angel said and threw a few wads of bills down. Jerry's face fell and he threw his arms in the air.

"No! You don't know who you fucking with!" he exclaimed. "Where's Bobby?" he asked and just as he turned around Bobby came up from behind him and planted a fist in his face. Sofi heard the commotion and ran to the doorway as Jerry fell down.

"What are you hiding, Jerry?" Bobby asked standing over him.

"What? What the fuck is wrong with you?" Jerry screamed looking up at Bobby. I felt Angel stand up and walked over to look down at Jerry. They were attacking him.

"If you had something to do with what happened, I swear to God, Jerry, I'm gonna kill you right here and now!" Bobby threatened. I jumped up, knowing full and well Bobby wasn't joking, but Jack pulled me down.

"No, Bobby, no!" Sofi yelled.

"He's your brother!" I screamed and Jack gripped my hand.

"Shut up, Emilie." he seethed. Bobby had never talked to me that way. Jack laid a comforting arm on my shoulder but I shrugged it off.

"Angel's gonna ask some questions. And, brother, I shit you not the time for lying is over." Bobby warned him.

"We know you're lying about your business." Angel pointed down at Jerry, as he tried to back away from them incase they decided to kick. "And we know you got mixed up with some gangsters."

"Hold on." Jerry told them softly and tried to get up. But Bobby wasn't having it.

"Stay down!" Bobby yelled and kicked him back to the floor. I tried to move again but Jack stopped me, again. I looked over at him about to curse but the look on his face stopped me. He was just as uncomfortable as I was.

"Y'all think I had something to do with Mom getting killed?" Jerry asked starting to sit up again.

"You got a check for 20,000 that you just so happened to forget to mention 400,000 from Mom's life insurance." Angel yelled. This was about the check? Did Jerry cash it? Now, I was really confused.

"She took out the policy for the girls. Man, I ain't have nothing to do with that. Come on." Jerry defended.

"You made the payments!" Jack yelled from next to me. Jerry sent him a hurt look, thinking Jack would be the only one not to attack him. He looked over at me next and all I could do was look away. I couldn't take sides now, I was more confused than ever.

"Good timing, Jerry. Just when it seems like all is lost for you, Mom gets shot by some gangsters and now you hit the fucking lottery!" Bobby yelled in his face.

"So y'all-? Y'all tripping because I made insurance payments? What!?" Jerry yelled and got back on his feet. He stood up and looked at Bobby and Angel.

"I paid all her bills!" he yelled then shoved Bobby and took a shot at Angel. I jumped when Angel fell into the wall, crushing a few shelves.

"Where the fuck were y'all? How many years did I have to take care of her my goddamn self? Hell, even Emilie had to fork out money to help her. Y'all were around doing nothing! Bullshitting! you gonna tell me I killed her? Come on, man!" Jerry yelled. He had a point. After they all left Jerry was the one taking care of Evelyn and I had to take some money out from my trust from Abigail to help at one point.

"So why would you pay off a killer like Sweet?" Angel asked him. "And what the fuck did he do for you, Jerry?"

"What did he do for me? He killed my fucking life! I put everything in that project! I bet it all trying to make something of myself! Trying to make the shit work! Then Vic's goons gonna come try to take a piece." Jerry explained. I settled seeing the looks on Bobby and Angel's faces. It was the looks that said, _'Oh shit, maybe we should have talked this out beforehand. And not jumped to stupid conclusion, like our brother paying to kill our mother.'_

"You paid him, Jerry. You got in bed with him, didn't you?" Bobby asked.

"No, no, no. I didn't pay them! That's how they fucking shut me down!" Jerry yelled at Bobby.

"Wait, I thought the city cut you off, Jerry?" Jack asked leaning up. Jerry turned to face us and waved his arm around.

"Douglas? Come on, man. This is Detroit! Sweet owns Douglas!" he told us. As turned back to Bobby and Angel someone knocked on the door. I went to stand up but Jack set me back down.

"I got it." he whispered.

"He ain't nothing but a gangster in a suit! I don't pay him, and now he shuts my loans off! End of story, end of project." Jerry kept ranting.

"So, what about the 20 grand?" Angel asked. Now this was all making sense but it didn't make me feel better.

"I just told you." Jerry hissed. "You wanna cross the bridge, you gotta pay the toll. I took the money. I was gonna pay the bribe until y'all fucked it up." he explained. I shook my head and looked over to the foyer when I heard Jack open the door. I heard a muffled voice but didn't hear what they said.

"Hey, fuck you, man!" I heard Jack start to yell out the door. "I will kick your-" he started. I furrowed my brow and started to stand up. I walk into the foyer and didn't see Jack at the door, but it was wide open.

"Jack?" I called out. I heard the voices stop in the living room and knew Bobby heard me.

"Jack." Bobby yelled and walked behind me in the foyer. I kept walking to the front door and looked out. I saw Jack running after some kid and my heart fell when the kid turned around.

"Jack!" I screamed as the man pointed the gun at Jack and fired.

The shot echoed through the empty streets and through my whole body. It was all in slow motion as I watched Jack fall to his knees, clutching his shoulder. Every tiny memory I had of him flashed through my eyes. The first time I saw him, the first time I melted when I saw his smile, our first kiss, our first fight, our first time together and the words he said to me last night.

'_I promise I'll never leave you. But I also promise that I will love you forever. Even after death.' _

"Even after death." I whispered shaking my head. I started to bolt out the door but an arm snuck around my waist and pulled me inside. I turned to see who dared grabbed me and it was Bobby.

"Jack!" he yelled over my shoulder and he passed me to Angel, kicking and screaming.

"Jack! No, let me go!" I wailed as Angel tried to pull me into the house.

I grabbed onto the door frame and watched Bobby run out the door, gun in hand. My whole body froze when I looked around him and saw the same man that shot Jack now holding the gun to Jack's head. But before he could pull the trigger Bobby had taken his shot and I watched as he fell limp to the ground. My eyes drifted to a van screeching to a halt behind them and then to Jack as he scurried to get to his feet and run to the house.

"Jack!" I yelled and started fighting against Angel again.

He held me firmly and was about to drag me inside when about four men piled out of the van and started firing, with Jack in their path. I let out a bloodcurdling scream when the shots hit Jack's legs and he fell to the ground once again. The shots came right after one another and I felt Angel and Jerry flinch as Jack's screams shared the air with the shots. Angel finally pushed me to the side and I peek over his shoulder to see firing at the men. He gets one as he was running but there were just too many.

"Shit." Bobby yelled and started to run back into the house. My eyes widen as I look from him to Jack. He was leaving Jack. Why was he leaving Jack? That was his brother, his flesh and blood. And he's leaving him there to die.

"Jack, what about Jack!?" I screamed and tried to push pass Angel. I got passed him but Bobby pushed me back inside when he came barreling through the door.

"Shit!" he yelled. "Get down! Get the fuck down!" he yelled as he ducks behind the bricks on the front porch.

Angel grabbed my wrist and pushed me and Sofi into the living room. I start to get up but Angel pushes me to Sofi, who drags me into the hallway. I fight with her and try to duck as bullets crash through the house.

"Let me go! He needs me." I cried and tried to move from her grip on my wrist. She yanked me back as a bullet came through the doorway. She held me to her chest.

"Get down!" Angel yelled at me.

"You can't be there for him if you're dead." she screamed.

I fell into her arms as she covered her head and mine from the flying debris. We jumped when a picture fell on our heads and scooted closer to a cabinet. I peeked out between mine and Sofi's arms and saw Jerry cowering behind a desk covering his head as the record player blew up.

"Jack!" Bobby yelled from the porch. "Shit!"

"Bobby!" came the muffled scream of my boyfriend. Sofi pulled me tighter as they yelled back and forth.

"Jack!" Jerry screamed trying to hold back tears.

I heard Bobby let out a frustrated scream and then heard a shot fired. I looked around the corner and saw Angel looking around. I looked over by the other doorway and spotted two guns.

"Emilie, give me the guns!" he yelled to me when he saw I spotted them.

I moved from Sofi's grip and scurried across the threshold and behind the tiny wall. I grab the guns and turn around to slide them to Angel. The gun shots were getting louder as the masked men got closer. Now my concern was not only for Jack but for Bobby. He was in the line of fire now.

Angel grabbed the guns and jumped up and fired out the front window. I got a better view of what was happening at my new spot but still looked over to make sure Sofi was okay. I peeked around the other side of the wall and saw straight out the door. I saw that Bobby was okay but froze when a man ran into the porch.

"Bobby!" I screamed when the man got into the door way.

Bobby heard me and fired at the intruder, hitting him in the knee. He lost his balance and fell backwards out the doorway. Bobby's face came into view as he gave me a quick nod and then looked out the door. The man was trying to get back up and Bobby shot him again.

"Bobby!" I heard Jack yell again. I saw Bobby look out toward the road and yell back.

"Jack, hold on!" he called out to his injured brother.

I buried my face in my hands as the continuous gun shots flew by me and crashed into the walls and furniture. Pictures, pieces of wood, glasses and all were breaking second after second. And the longer the shots lasted the long Jack was bleeding out and the more danger Bobby and Angel were in. I looked around and the house was already covered in holes and I hoped that the men would give up and just leave.

For a moment I thought I got my wish. The shots stopped and everyone grew quiet. Sofi was holding her hands over her mouth and Jerry was trying to stay as still as possible. I couldn't see Angel or Bobby and hoped they were okay. I slowly started to look around the wall when they started again. I only got to see the men firing at Bobby behind the bricks.

I saw a movement behind me and turned to see Jerry bolting by me to the side door.

"Jeremiah, where are you going?" Sofi yelled as he stopped in the doorway and gazed out the window. I turned to look at Sofi and then back at Jerry but he was gone. I watched bullets fly through the side door and then a man kick it down. I froze as he looked down at me and out of no where Jerry jumped behind him and stabbed him.

"I got kids! A wife. A family." he mumbled as he let the man fall.

Jerry gave me one last look before he bolted out the door. Was he leaving? Where was he going? I was about to move but I saw Angle run past me upstairs. I quickly followed him, crawling as close as I could to the stairs to avoid the bullets. I reached the top floor and saw him fire a few shots into Jack's room and then walked to Evelyn's room. I was about to pass when the bullets' flew from Jack's room and Angel fired our of Evelyn's window. I smirked realizing he had tricked them. They started shooting at Jack's room and he got a few good shots in from the next room, military taught him well. Though my smirk faded when Angle saw me.

"Diddle get down! And go back downstairs." he yelled at me.

I dropped back to the floor and crawled back over to the staircase. I looked down the hall and clearly saw Bobby hiding behind the bricks. He went to pump the shot gun but it was empty.

"Oh, shit." he cursed.

I saw him look through a hole and look for a gun as a man was walking back to the house. I slowly made my way down as he grabbed a brick and launched himself out the door, smacking the man's face in with the new weapon of choice. I saw Bobby fall on top of the man and start hitting him. I instinctively ran out for him. He was outside, unarmed, not paying attention to what's around him, in the middle of a shoot out in Detroit city. Maybe someone should have stayed long enough to hold his hand.

"Motherfucker! You fucking-" Bobby yelled while punching him. I ducked behind the front door and peeked out, trying to look out for Bobby. I saw a guy across the street grab his gun and I was about to scream when Angel jumped from Evelyn's window and tackled the guy, kicking the gun from his hand. As soon s the gun skidded across the street, I heard the squealing of tires. I looked over and saw the van speeding towards Bobby. I bolted from the house and ran to Bobby. Angel yelling for me to go back the whole time.

"Bobby! Bobby! Bobby!" I screamed running over to him and grabbing his jacket. "The van! Watch out!"

The van was just a few feet away when Bobby finally looked up. Before we knew it Angle was tackling us back and Jerry slammed into the front of the van. We all looked at the two cars shocked and watched the airbags blow up in Jerry's face. . But reality set in and I bolted from Angel and Bobby's grasp.

I ran over to Jack and nearly fainted when I saw the blood soaked snow around his body. I dropped to my knees nest to his head as Bobby and Angel made their way over.

"Jackie." I whispered setting his head in my lap and caressing his forehead. "Oh Jackie, please." I cried.

"Jack, look at me! Jack, you all right?" Bobby urged holding his hand and crying.

"Hold on, baby." I whispered.

"We need an ambulance!" Bobby screamed into the now silent street. I heard a door slam and saw Jerry stumble out and rush over to us.

"Somebody help! Call 911!" I screamed into the still air. Jack was dying, he was loosing blood by the second. I kept rubbing his head and whispering in his ear as Bobby and Angel held hands on his wounds.

"Jack." Jerry cried falling next to me by the light pole.

"Jack. Jack!" Bobby cried holding his hands. I cried harder when Jack tried to talk but blood came out instead of words. I let out a sob and leaned my head down to his. His hand quickly reached the back of my neck and held me to him.

"Jack, please. Don't leave me. You promised." I cried.

"Come on, man." Bobby pleaded. I looked over at Sofi and saw her opening her cell.

"Hurry, Sofi. Hurry, he's dying!" I sobbed.

"I'm calling, I'm calling." she rushed and held the phone to her ear.

"Come on, Jack, you gotta breathe!" Bobby begged holding onto his brother. "Don't you die on me, you little fairy. Come on, Jack. Please!" he cried. Sofi hung up with 911 and crawled over to Angel, enveloping the crying man into her arms.

"You gotta fucking breathe! Come on! Jack! Jack." Bobby urged as Jack started to sputter. I heard a sob behind me and knew it was Jerry. He was curled up to the phone pole trying to look away. It took one day and one simple shot to break these men down, to let everyone's true colors show. If I lost Jack, I'd loose them. And it'd be bad enough loosing one. You lost one brother, you lost all four.

I barely noticed Bobby getting up and walking over to the van. I didn't hear all of what was said but I did hear this…

"Thank God? He killed my mother and maybe my little brother, you motherfucker!" Bobby growled.

"Thank Victor Sweet."

And the last shot was fired. I felt his presence near me again as the ambulance sirens filled the air. The were almost here. I pressed my hand to his shoulder as we waited for the EMT's to get there.

"Jack, come on, Jack, please! Please... Jack. Just a few more minutes and you'll be okay. I'll even sing for you, remember you asking me to sing? I'll sing, you just gotta breath and be okay." I cried looking in his eyes.

The ambulance pulled up with a few cops cars and people swarmed the house, this time no guns. Bobby, Angel and Jerry moved away as the EMT rushed over to Jack. The immediately put him on a stretcher and put a oxygen mask on his face. They picked him up and moved the stretcher onto the gurney and moved him over to the back of the ambulance. The whole time I held his hand. I only let go when the pulled him into the back. I went to get in and the EMT stopped me.

"You family?" he asked. Green walked form around the side and nodded.

"That's his wife." he told him. "Stay there at the hospital." he warned me. I nodded and the EMT helped me into the back of the van. He closed the door and I watched Green walk over to Jack's brothers, slowly they disappeared and I looked back at Jack.

They had cut his shirt from him and cut a slit up his pants to get a better look at his wounds. One was patching up the shoulder wound while the other covered the shots to his leg, there looked to be about five. I covered my face and watched them. I wanted to hold him but I wanted him to be taken care of first. They must have sensed this and one looked at me.

"Talk to him, it might help. Hold his hand, let him no he's not alone." the man smiled. I nodded and scooted to the end of the gurney. I grabbed his hand and laid my other on his forehead. I saw him look over at me and I smiled.

"Hey, Jackie boy. I'm right here. I won't go anywhere." I whispered. The sudden beeps from the machines made me jump and I watched the two men scurry and push me back. I started to panic and looked at Jack.

He looked back and through all the pain I saw in those slowly fading eyes, I saw a smile. I saw him smiling, telling me it'll be okay. I closed my eyes and I saw him more vividly. The sun was shining on his face as he smiled and walked over to me. I sucked in a deep breath when he touched my cheek, it felt so real. I looked up at him and although I couldn't hear it, I saw it. I saw his lips move to say the words that broke through everything else.

_I love you, even after death._

But death couldn't be now. I can't take death right now. Not anymore, not Jack. I'm not ready yet. I'm not ready to do it by myself. I'm not ready to live and love without him. Who would catch me when I fall or keep me from feeling alone when the it feels like the work has turned against me. I got used to doing it all with him, I don't know if could. He became a part of me, if I loose him, I loose me. I loose everything all over again. I fall back into the shadow that my life had been before him. I fall back into the role of yet another grieving girl. The girl who looses everyone she cares for. The girl who seems to be cursed.

The girl who crashes and burns.

_Time is gonna take my mind __and carry it far away where I can fly_

_The depth of life will dim my temptation to live for you_

_If I were to be alone silence would rock my tears_

_'cause it's all about love and I know better_

_How life is a waving feather_

_So I put my arms around you around you_

_And I know that I'll be leaving soon_

_My eyes are on you they're on you_

_And you see that I can't stop shaking_

_No, I won't step back but I'll look down to hide from your eyes_

_'cause what I feel is so sweet and I'm scared that even my own breath_

_Oh could burst it if it were a bubble_

_And I'd better dream if I have to struggle_

_So I put my arms around you around you_

_And I hope that I will do no wrong_

_My eyes are on you they're on you_

_And I hope that you won't hurt me_

_I'm dancing in the room as if I was in the woods with you_

_No need for anything but music_

_Music's the reason why I know time still exists_

_Time still exists_

_Time still exists_

_Time still exists_

_So I just put my arms around you around you_

_And I hope that I will do no wrong_

_My eyes are on you they're on you_

_And I hope that you won't hurt me_

_My arms around you they're around you _

_and I hope that I will do no wrong_

_My eyes are on you they're on you_

_They're on you _

_My eyes..._

* * *

_Dancing by Elisa_


	18. I Killed Them

**Okay here it is! Next chapter is almost done...Ive been distracted by the Olympics...lol. But I hope you enjoy this! :)**

**Straight Edge Queen**

**BEG75 **

**lemmonpie**

**SexySadie88**

**MissIndependent101**

**Thank you all for reviewing! I love them, they make my day. :)**

* * *

I opened my eyes and the dream was gone. The only Jack I saw was the one bleeding on the stretcher in front of me. All I could do was cry and stare at him as all the buzzers went off. The two men were moving frantically around the back grabbing different bottles and needles and then sticking them into the IV. I wanted to scream and yell and be the frantic girlfriend but I was too shocked.

"Hurry! We don't have much longer!" one of the men yelled. I looked at him wide eyed and then back at Jack.

"What's going on?" I finally spoke. "Is he going to be okay?"

They looked over at me but didn't answer. I stared at them until the tears blurred my vision and I blinked. I felt the big tear drops drip off my lashes and hit my cheeks as I looked down at Jack. I moved to the edge of my seat and grabbed his free hand. I closed my eyes and let out a small sob as I brought his near cold hand to my lips and pressed a kiss to it.

I didn't know we were at the hospital until the back door was ripped open. The men jumped out and pulled Jack out the van and I followed them.

"Ma'am, are you family?" a nurse asked. I blinked a few times and tried to open my mouth but only cried instead.

"She's his wife." the EMT told her. She nodded and I rushed to grab Jack's hand as the bustled through the ER doors.

"Caucasian male, 23 years old, GSW to the right shoulder and looks like four to the legs." the nurse yelled to the others as we rushed through the hallway. I was still holding his hand as they pushed him into a room and started peeling his shirt off and cutting the rest of his pants legs off.

"It's okay, Jackie. They're gonna fix you now." I cried. The nurse from earlier pushed me to the side gently and I watched as she slid a tube down Jack's throat.

"What's that?" I asked from behind her. I kept moving out of the way as people came running in with IV bags and bags of blood for him.

"A breathing tube." she told me quickly.

"He's not breathing!" I screamed and rushed back over to him.

"It's so he can breath better and incase he does stop. Just stand back and let us help him." she smiled. I nodded and moved back and watched as they finished putting the tube in and hooked a bag onto it. They were moving so fast it felt like the world was spinning but then again, it might have just been me. I shook it off and looked over as a man in blue scrubs walked in.

"He stable?" he asked. The nurse nodded and pointed to me.

"Yes, he's ready. That's his wife." she told him. They pulled the bars on the side of the stretcher up and started to roll him out.

"Where's he going?" I asked. The man with the blue scrubs walked over and laid a hand on my back.

"He needs surgery to remove the bullet from his shoulder and to stop the bleeding. We'll also fix his legs up and make sure no bones were cracked or broken." he told me as we walked.

"Is he going to be okay?" I choked. He looked down at me and smiled.

"I'm going to do my best." he told me. "Now, I know you're not married. But I will need to see family soon." he smiled.

"They should be here soon." I whispered. He patted my shoulder and looked down at me again.

"You and anyone else can wait in the OR's waiting room. It's on the third floor. I'll come find you when we're done." he promised. "You wanna see him one more time?" he asked. I nodded and walked over to him. I leaned over his near lifeless body and kissed his forehead.

"You have to be okay, I'm counting on you. Come back to me, Jackie boy." I whispered and kissed his head again. I pulled back and nodded for them to continue their way. I watched them walk into the elevator and let a new flow of tears fall when they closed. That may be the last time I see him. I tried to stop the tears and looked around for a phone. I spotted one at the end of the hallway and walked down. I slipped two quarters in and dialed the number.

"Hello?" the soft voice asked.

"Paisley-" I sobbed.

"Em, what's wrong?" she asked. "Where are you at?"

"The hospital." I cried.

"I'll be there ASAP." she told me and hung up. I placed the phone back on the receiver and leaned against the wall. I covered my face with my hands and slowly slid down the length of the wall, crying.

* * *

All I could do was sigh as I pulled up to the Mercer's house. There were numerous bodies in the street, two wrecked cars, frantic and scared people looking out their windows and wounded little brother and hysterical Emilie heading to the ambulance. I walked passed the back and heard the EMT ask Emilie if she was family.

"That's his wife." I told him and looked at Emilie. "Stay there at the hospital." I warned her. She nodded and hopped into the van with them. I turned back to the scene before me and frowned at the spots of blood from where Jack just was and then over to the bodies in the street.

"Photograph them." I called to an investigator and pointed to the bodies. He nodded and I walked towards the brothers.

"Hey, let me talk to them, okay?" I said passing another detective. He gladly nodded and walked off. It seemed like I was the only one who could work with these fools.

"Look, I'm real sorry, man. I really am. But what happened here?" I asked standing in front of what was left of the Mercer family.

"Victor Sweet did this." Bobby said looking up at me.

"How do you figure that?" I asked.

"Because his friend in the bag over there told me." he replied pointing to one of the numerous body bags on their sidewalk. I nodded and looked back.

"Okay, I'll make sure I get a statement from him then." I said sarcastically and glared at him.

"Why did Sweet do us like this, man?" Jerry mumbled looking at the ground.

"And why did it have to be our moms?" Angel asked.

"Because Evelyn was going after him. She knew her son, man. She never thought for a second that you were corrupt." I told them. Jerry looked up at me sadly and shook his head.

"But I never told her about my business." he told me. I sighed and leaned in to them.

"Jerry, were you ever able to keep a secret from her? She knew all about your trouble, man. The moment they shut you down, she went down there, raising hell with the councilman." I told him.

"You gonna bury Sweet, or are we?" Bobby asked, ignoring all I had said.

"Well, I got me-" I paused and looked around "-a dirty uniform I gotta deal with first." I said slowly.

"What?" Bobby asked.

"You see, I found out not too long ago, Evelyn filed a report that got passed on to Victor Sweet." I started.

"By who?" Bobby asked.

"Look, I just got something I-" I started but Bobby cut me off.

"Don't bullshit me, Green. Who are you protecting?" Bobby snapped. "Your boy Fowler?"

"Look, the only person I'm protecting now is someone else that's close to ya'll. I'll take care of Fowler." I snapped back. "And then we get Sweet."

"Green?" Angel called as I started to walk away. "So how we gonna deal with all this?" he asked waving his hand around.

"Self-defense. Wasn't it?" I asked and turned to walk away. I walked back to my car and backed-up. I needed to have a chat with Fowler.

* * *

I sat slumped on the ground under the phone the whole time. My knees were drawn up to my chest and my head was using them as a very uncomfortable pillow with my arms covering any other piece of my face. I wanted to feel like I was invisible and this was the way it felt best for me. Although, it really just drew more attention to me. I could feel people stare at me as they walked by and I herd them whisper to each other wondering why I was upset and if they should ask if I needed help. I wanted to stand up and yell at them that I wasn't the one that needed help, it was Jack. He was laying on the operating table having god only knows what done to him. As if people aren't in enough pain, surgeons go in and cut them up and leave worse scars than they had to begin with. Now, I know I was being selfish but this was my way of dealing. Get mad at everyone else for the time being.

I finally got tired of hearing them and decided I would wait in the OR's waiting room on the third floor. I slowly pushed myself up from the floor and stood up. I walked the few feet back to the elevator and reached out to press the button. I froze when I did.

Blood.

Blood was all over my extended hand. It was dried now but it was there and it was a loud reminder of what had just happened. I drew it in and held it in front of me, turning it around looking at the dark maroon stains. I lifted my other hand and saw the same thing. I felt everything start to shake and I slowly started to back up. I moved back until I hit the wall again. I felt a rush of wind next to me and then a hand on my shoulder. I looked up through my blurry eyes and saw the blonde hair with a few streaks of purple and pink.

"Pais?" I whispered, blinking the tears from my eyes.

"My god." she breathed looking at my hands and at my clothes. I looked down and my eyes blurred again. "Let's get you cleaned up. Troy, James find out what happened." she told them while leading me down the hallway to the bathroom.

She ushered me in and locked the door. She pushed me to the sink and turned the water on. I held my hands out as she squirted soap in my hands. I looked over at her as she started washing my hands for me. I felt her nails dig into my skin, scraping the blood off, but it didn't hurt. I looked down and watched the red swirl in with the water and slowly go down the drain.

"Don't watch it." she whispered. I looked back over at her and smiled. It wasn't a happy smile, it was more of a I'm so hurt and angry, I've gone mad kind of smile.

"He almost died." I told her. "He still could die. He was shot like, oh, six times." I rambled nodding my head. She looked at me shocked and stopped washing my hands as the beginning of my break down began.

"He ran out after some kid that knocked on the door and got shot. I watched it." I told her. "I watched him hold the gun and shoot Jack." I whispered and looked away.

"I saw him fall…" I let a few tears fall and looked back at her. Her eyes were brimmed with tears and she was chewing her thumb nail. "I heard him screaming, in pain and in agony." I sobbed, as Paisley drew me into her arms.

"He was screaming for help and Bobby left him. We all left him. We ran and hid while he was out there in the middle of the firing." I sobbed and she slowly guided me to the floor and set me in her lap.

"Shhh…Calm down." she whispered, holding my head to her neck.

"I left him, I didn't mean to. They held me back, they wouldn't let me." I sobbed.

"You would have gotten hurt, they didn't want that. Jack wouldn't want that." she said, trying to soothe me. I lifted my head and looked at her sadly.

"I was going to open the door." I whispered and she gave me an odd look. "The knock at the door, I stood up to get it but he answered it." I remembered.

I was supposed to answer that door. I should have been the one where Jack is. I put him there, I was the reason he was there…

"No, don't you dare!" she snapped. "Don't you dare play that what if bull shit, Emilie. You know damn well that if you would have answered that door, you would be dead. Jack's fighting for you, so suck it up. Give him something to fight for, don't play that. It's selfish and you know it." she yelled. I pulled back from her a little and looked around.

"I can't loose him, Pais. He's all I have." I whispered. She held my face and made me look at her.

"You won't. He loves you, he will no leave you. But he needs you right now, so be there for him. Stop blaming yourself, stop thinking about everything else. Think about him." she told me.

A loud knock came at the door and Troy's voice drifted through.

"He's out of surgery. We can see him now." he yelled.

* * *

It killed me to see the look in her eyes. She was dying inside. That feeling only escalated when she realized she was covered in his blood. Her hands were stained, her shirt and pants were soaked, she had him all over her but not in the way she needed. She needed his arms around her but instead he was laying in the hospital bed, fighting for his life.

"Is he okay?" Emilie asked, looking at Jack's frail looking body in the bed. He had tubes coming from his arms, mouth and nose.

"We're not sure. He's under sedation now, for pain, of course. We managed to stop the internal bleeding and the wound on his shoulder looks clean. Luckily, only one bullet hit bone in his leg. It's broke but it will heal. It's up to him now." the doctor told us.

"Thank you." I whispered to him. He nodded and paused for going out.

"Would you like a pair of scrubs, miss?" he asked Emilie. She looked up a little and shook her head.

"No." she whispered, tracing a lonesome finger down his arm and starting intently at him. She sat on the very edge of the bed and brushed a piece of his hair out of his face.

"He'll be okay." I said after a few minutes of silence. She nodded her head lightly and looked over at me.

"Can you stay here?" she asked me. I sent her a confused look and nodded.

"Yeah, why?" I asked. She took a deep breath before placing a small kiss on his fore head and standing up.

"I need to leave for a while." she whispered and grabbed her jacket. I stood up and walked over to her.

"Where are you going? Jack needs you." I told her. She gave me a sad look and looked over at him again.

"If he needed me, he'd be awake right now." she said, her voice cracking. I wanted to stop her but the look in her eyes told me not to, so I watched her leave. I looked over at Jack and walked over to the side of his bed.

"You really have a way of hurting her when you don't mean to, huh?" I mumbled and fixed his hospital gown.

Since the first day I had seen them together, I knew they were good for each other. They both had been through so much, granted neither experienced what the other had. But they endured childhood's that no one should go through. Emilie had everyone taken away from her, leaving her to believe that she couldn't get close to anyone. It was a miracle she let Jack get in but Jack had always been the charmer. He had gone through some horrific foster homes. He took the beatings they gave him and stayed quiet. When Evelyn got him he was so far away from everyone, they thought he'd be a lost cause. But Evelyn fixed him. She brought him out of his shell and made him the man he was today. That's why she left Jack to deal with Emilie. She knew Jack could fix her like she had fixed him. Whether they would come out friends, siblings or partners, Evelyn know Jack could help Emilie.

"You're not done yet, Jack. She still needs you. Don't prove her right." I whispered to him. I had this awful feeling that even if Jack did wake up, Emilie would sink deeper into her despair. Today was a day that would change her for the worst.

* * *

I watched Green walk away from us. I was almost speechless. I had so many emotions and things running through my head I didn't know what to do, what to say or where to go. This only shocked me more. I had never been stalled like this. I had never had so much happen that I over loaded. It wasn't me. It wasn't Bobby Mercer.

Bobby Mercer always knew what to do. He knew what to say, when to say it, how to say it and who to say it to. He never back downed and he never let anything or anyone get him or stand in his way. He was the fighter of her Mercer's. The Michigan Mauler. The man no on messed with. He made the last name famous and well known. He gave it the effect it had on people. He made sure he was the one calling the shots. It's what he was known for.

Yet, somehow, he managed to let the control slip into someone else's hands. He was so blinded with revenge and anger he didn't see the bigger picture. He practically, invited them into his house to kill him and his family. He started all this with the intention of avenging those the death of his mother. But instead he led them straight to his family. His little brother.

Jack.

He put them in this situation. He let it escalate. He let it get out of control. He opened the window for his brother to get shot and possibly die. And if he did die, he was the one that killed the rest of Emilie. He did the complete opposite of what his mother taught him to do. Instead of protecting them, he killed them.

I killed them.

"Bobby?" Angel asked softly. I opened my eyes and looked at him through my hands.

"What?" I whispered.

"When do you wanna leave?" he asked me. I stared at him for a second before looking back at the scene in front of me.

It looked like the picture perfect day in Detroit. There was a newly formed blood stain in the snow, which probably had already set in the concrete below. Not to mention the other new blood stains in the streets. A wrecked car and of course our house. It looked like a chunk of Swiss cheese, honestly. It had holes everywhere and anywhere you could think. On any other day, and any other house, I wouldn't be surprised but it's not any other day, it's today. And it's not anybody else's house, it's mine. So right now it all looked surreal.

"Has Emilie called?" I asked and looked back at him.

"No, we tried her cell but no one answered." he said shaking his head. I felt another person next to me and looked over at Jerry.

"We need to go." he whispered, his voice cracking. "I need- we need to know if he's-" he stopped. I looked away and took a deep breath.

"Let's go." I whispered.

I didn't want to. I was afraid that when we got there we'd be greeted with the worst news of our lives. The news that would leave us to bury our little brother just days after burying out mother. I only hoped that things really couldn't get worse, but I had a feeling they would.

* * *

I drove from the Mercer's house and set out to find Fowler. Someone said he was going on break to a near by bar and that bar just happened to be on my places to find Victor Sweet. This was not just a bunch of coincidences.

"Hey. What's happening, partner?" I yelled as I walked through the bar. I saw Fowler in the back at a pool table.

"What's cooking, boss?" he called out, taking a shot and not even bothering to look up at me. I walked over and pulled my gloves off.

"Isn't this one of Victor Sweet's spots?" I asked out of curiosity.

"Yeah, I heard that. So what?" he asked, still not looking at me. I nodded and looked around.

"So why ain't you tell me that you had talked to Evelyn Mercer a week before she got killed? I mean, don't you think that that's relevant to a murder investigation?" I asked, trying not to sound like I was attacking him when all I wanted to do was beat the living hell out of him.

"I didn't tell you because it wasn't relevant at all." he said and finally stood up to look at me.

"Really?" I asked as he blew the extra chalk of his stick.

"Yeah, I talked to the old lady for all of about five minutes. She came in with her usual medley. Kids tagging up her block, that kind of shit." he told me calmly, while taking a shot a the number three ball.

"You know, I figured it was something like that. But you still should have said something to me, man." I smiled at him. He nodded and chalked his stick up again.

"Sorry." he mumbled and looked over at me.

"Did she file a police report?" I asked. He shook his head and lined up another shot.

"No. I sent it over to the Parks Department. They clean that shit up." he told me and leaned down to take the shot.

"Five minutes, huh?" I pressed.

"Yeah. Couldn't have been much more than that." he nodded and hit the eight-ball in. "You wanna take a shot? You're gonna need some practice." he asked holding the stick out. I was starting to get the feeling he knew what I was getting at but I wasn't sure. This guy had on a strong poker face.

"I'd love to." I said and took to the pool stick from him. "It's been a long time since I played a game like this one." I laughed and chalked up the end.

"Is that so?" he asked, sipping his drink.

"Yeah." I told him and went to line it up. I looked down the end of it a few times and leaned up to look at him. "Partner, I think your stick is crooked." I told him.

"I think it's all right." he told me casually. I sighed and flipped it over, shaking my head.

"And the weight is off." I told him.

"Worked pretty good for me." he commented.

"You sure?" I asked, looking over at him.

"Yeah." he nodded. I nodded and swung the stick over the tops of his legs. He screamed and fell to the ground as I grabbed his gun and pressed it to his neck.

"You is a dirty cop!" I seethed. "Give me your badge." I ordered him. "See, I hate dirty cops." I told him, after snatching his badge, and went to walk out the back door.

"Green, wait. Green, wait! There is something I forgot." he yelled and followed me out the back door.

"What? What the fuck you wanna say to me?" I yelled and turned to look at him. Before I could react he fired.

* * *

I hated to leave Jack in the hospital. I hated to think of what Paisley was thinking of me right now. She probably thought that I was a horrible person and girlfriend for leaving but I had to.

For the first time since all of this went down, I feel what Bobby felt. I felt and I saw what Bobby had been seeing since he got the call that Evelyn had been shot. I saw red and I saw revenge, the need to go find the bastard that attacked our family. And I felt the numbness that comes with it all. I now knew why Bobby wanted to do this, why he wanted to go after Sweet in the beginning. It's the same reason I have for going to find Green and talk to him about Fowler.

I was on my way to the station when I passed Green's patrol car and behind it was Fowler's. I quickly pulled over and looked over at the bar.

"God help me." I mumbled, pulling my jacket tight around my body and jogging across the street to the bar. I pulled the heavy bar door open and looked around. I couldn't see Green or Fowler anywhere so I walked to the bar.

"What can I get ya miss?" the bartender asked and then looked at me funny.

"Were there two men in here? One white, one black?" I asked. He nodded and pointed to the back.

"They just walked out back. They ain't to happy either." he smirked. I thanked him and walked through the bar to the back. I took my time pushing the door open incase they were still fighting. I creaked it open and peeked between the gap when I did I saw Green turning around and yelling at Fowler.

"What? What the fuck you wanna say to me?" Green yelled.

"I forgot they installed those surveillance cameras in the station." Fowler told him. I pushed the door open a little more and gasped out loud when Fowler pulled out a gun and fired it at Green. I saw him fall and grip his shoulder. I quickly covered my mouth but he heard me. His head spun around and my eyes widened. I could see my car at the end of the alley and jumped from the door.

"Motherfucker!" he yelled and ran after me. I ran as fast as I could toward the end of the alley but he caught up and grabbed my wrist before I got to the street. He yanked me back and I yelped when I felt my shoulder dislocate. He wrapped an arm around my waist and drug me back to his car. I struggled with him as he opened the trunk of his car.

"Stop, bitch!" he grumbled and tried to shove me in the trunk. I moved in his grip and bit down on his hand. He snatched his hand away and threw me to the ground. I tried to get up and run but the butt of his gun came down over my eyebrow and I was on the ground again. I saw spots of black as he finally shoved me in his trunk, where I passed out.


	19. Gettin' Cozy

**Thanks for all the great reviews but here's a heads up...Depending on whether Jack lives or not, Chapter 21 could be the last chapter. If I kill Jack, 21 will be the final one. If I save him the story shall continue. But you will find out in 21 whether he lives...lol. So that's a head up incase 21 is the last chapter. But for now, enjoy chapter 19!**

* * *

Emilie had been gone for nearly three hours and I still hadn't seen any of Jack's family. I got a brief update on the news saying that police were still crawling all over the Mercer's house. So I figured they were tied up. I didn't mind sitting with Jack but his family should be here. They should be watching over him as the nurses and doctors rush in to check him every twenty-five minutes. They should be here watching him as his bandages are changed and when they come and replace his IV bags. They should be here incase he takes his last breath.

"Paisley?"

My head shot up and turned around to the source of the voice. For some reason I was jumpy but I relaxed when I saw Jerry, Bobby and Angel in the doorway.

"What are you going here?" Bobby asked, averting his from Jack. They all were afraid to look at him, but I understood why.

"Emilie called me. She was upset." I told him softly. Jerry walked over to the other side of Jack's bed and pulled a chair while Angel sat on the tiny sofa facing the foot of the bed.

"Well, where is she?" Bobby asked walking over to the window. I hesitated on answering him. I knew he'd flip if he knew she just left like she did. But I knew she needed her time and I knew he wouldn't understand.

"I sent her home." I replied a little too quickly. They boys all looked at me and I smiled sadly. "She was covered in blood and she needed to get cleaned up." I finished calmly.

"Have they said anything about him?" Jerry asked quietly looking at his little brother. I looked over and smiled at him.

"They removed the bullets, stopped his internal bleeding and stabilized him." I told them. "They are changing his dressings every two hours and they have him sedated for pain."

"Will he be okay?" Bobby asked. The sound of his voice shocked me. Never had I heard him sound so small and so hurt.

"They said it's up to him." I whispered.

"Lemme guess, they encourage minimal optimism?" Angel asked from the end of the bed. I looked over and nodded.

"They said it's up to him now. When they stop the drugs, he could wake up or he could stay in the coma." I said, brushing the hair out his face again.

"So this is it?" Bobby asked finally looking at Jack. "We just wait?"

I looked over at him and offered a weak smile that he didn't acknowledge as he sat in the edge of Jack's bed. That was how we sat for another hour. No one talking or moving, just watching, afraid to look away incase something happened.

"Whoa, Pais, turn the TV up." Angel told me. I looked over and snatched the remote up to turn the volume up.

_'Tonight we are mourning the death of Lt. Markus Green, who was shot outside of a local bar late this afternoon. Detective John Fowler was on the scene and described the suspects as two young African American males. If you have any information that could be useful please feel free to contact the Detroit Police. Our thoughts and prayers are with the Lt.'s family.'_

"Oh my god." I blurted out, shocked. I kept my eyes on the screen as they showed the scene behind the bar and yet another body bag on the streets of Detroit. I watched as Fowler's face appeared on the screen and started talking about how upset he was that someone would attack a cop and how much he would miss his friend.

"How much you wanna bet Sweet is behind this?" Angel snarled.

"About as much as I'd bet Sweet will be swimming with the fishes when I get done with him." Bobby growled and turned the TV off.

I tried to say something but I couldn't. I didn't know this much had went down. I knew a little bit but only what Emilie told me and that was from Jack. And I knew for a fact he didn't share all the gory details. I nodded and leaned back in my chair.

"Well, I'm heading home." Jerry announced softly, after a few minutes. "Anyone need a ride?"

"They said only one person can stay." I told them. They all nodded and Bobby looked around at us.

"You guys go. I'll stay here." he told us and took the chair Jerry had vacated. We all nodded and left the room quietly.

We drove in silence as we made our way to my apartment. No one really knowing what to say or if they should say anything at all.

"Jer, I'm going to se if Diddle's okay." Angel said getting out behind me. I stopped abruptly and turned to face him.

"No, you shouldn't." I blurted out. I didn't want him going up there incase Emilie wasn't home. I didn't want him to flip on me and go all Marine on the town. "Her lights not on, so she's sleeping. I'll check on her for you but she really needs her space." The boys looked at me oddly and Angel cast one last glance at her window before nodding his head.

"Just tell her we miss her and we love her." he whispered and got back into the car. I nodded and watched them pull off. I looked around the parking lot and noticed that Emilie's car wasn't there. I sighed and hurried up to her apartment.

She wasn't there.

I decided not to look around and just go home. It was only 11pm, maybe she went out for a run or maybe she was back at the hospital. I knew one of the last places she wanted to be was here with all the memories of Jack. Even I didn't like being here and seeing the tiny reminders that Jack was here and was supposed to be here and not in that hospital bed.

* * *

To say the least, I had a rude awakening. All of sudden I was jerked and smashed into a wall of some kind. I wasn't sure what time it was, where I was or how I got there but that wasn't what was bugging me. What was bugging me was the headache I had and the fact that for some reason I couldn't see or move. I thought it was a weird dream but the longer I laid there thinking about trying to wake up the more it set it.

Fowler.

I remembered seeing Green being killed and then Fowler attacking me and it all hit me like a ton of bricks. I started to wiggle my arms and legs and shook my head to try and get whatever it was that was covering my eyes to fall. After shaking and nodding my head a few times the cloth fell of my eyes and I looked around. I sighed when I realized I was still in his trunk but we weren't moving. I heard foot steps right out and then the trunk was opened. I was expecting light but it was pitch black outside.

"Still alive I see." Fowler smirked and grabbed my forearm roughly. I winced as my hurt shoulder hit the side of the car as he drug me out. I looked around when I was standing and I noticed we were at a house.

'His house?' I wondered. He closed the trunk and started walking me into the back side of the house.

"Why'd you kill Green?" I asked as he pushed me into the kitchen. He laughed and looked over at me as I leaned against the counter.

"You've been hanging out with them Mercer's too long. They, too, think they are cops." he said and grabbed my arms again.

"Better than you." I smirked as he drug me up a small flight of stairs. He opened the door and pushed me, making me fall.

"Shut up." he growled and yanked a wooden chair from the corner. He picked me up and set me in it and tapped my ankles to the legs of the chair. Then he retied my arms behind the chair, which put even more pressure on my shoulder.

"You're stupider than I thought if you think you're getting away with this." I smiled sweetly at him. He glared at me and ripped one last piece of tape off and smacked it on my lips. He bent down to my level and smiled.

"And you're stupid for thinking I won't." he winked and grabbed my face. Even thought the tape separated us, I grimaced when he planted his lips on mine. He pulled back and walked back out the door. I stared at the door for a few minutes and sighed.

This was great. Ironic to some point. I was sitting here, tied up in a cops attic, while Jack was in the hospital. He could be dead, he could be awake, he could be hating me for not being there, or worried sick about where I was. Because no one knows where I was. I told Paisley I was leaving and just left. I didn't give any indication as to where I went. So by the time they notice I'm gone they could think I just ran off. How were they to know that I was kidnapped? How were they to know it was Fowler? Did they even know Fowler was dirty? Did they know Green was dead yet? Would I ever get out of here?

Will I ever get to see Jack again?

* * *

I fell asleep not too long after everyone had left. I tried to stay awake to make sure he was okay and to make sure the nurses were doing their job but the day had taken it's toll on me and I couldn't keep my eyes open. I woke a couple times when they were would lift Jack, to change his dressing, and would accidentally pull off the heart monitors, sending the machines in a wild beeping frenzy. They apologized profusely and I fell back asleep.

"Bobby?"

I cracked my eyes open and saw Paisley standing in front of me. I closed them back and stretched before sitting up.

"What time is it?" I asked.

"8am." she replied and handed me a white styrofoam cup. I nodded a thanks and took it. I opened the lid and inhaled the wakening smell before taking a sip.

"Angel and Jerry are on their way. They dropped me off and went to get breakfast. They wanted me to wake you up first." she told me and sat down on the sofa.

"Where's Diddle?" I asked, wondering if she came with them. Paisley looked at me and frowned.

"You haven't seen her?" Angel asked, walking in the room with Jerry right behind him. I sat up and looked at them.

"No." I answered shortly.

"Did you check on her like you said you would?" Angel asked looking at Paisley.

"No, her lights were off." she told us. "You guys she needs time to herself. She'll probably come by later after she's calmed down. She's not really used to having her boyfriend being shot and dealing with thugs on a daily basis."

"Well, if she don't show by lunch we're going to get her skinny ass." I mumbled and took the bag of food from Jerry.

"Ya know Green's service is today at 9." Jerry spoke up after eating. I looked over at him and nodded. "I was thinking we could stop by and pay our respects. Green always had our backs, Bobby. You know that."

"My brother and James are coming by later to see Jack so you guys can go if you want." Paisley told us. I looked over at the clock and sighed

"Alright. Just call us if anything happens." I said getting up. "Try and get a hold of Diddle. I want her here when we get back." Paisley nodded and took the seat she occupied yesterday as we walked out.

It seemed like this was how the rides were going to be, long and silent. But for the second time in the span of half a month we are heading to the cemetery. And all that was in our minds was the thought that the next time we would come here would be to bury our little brother.

About half the cops in Detroit were surrounding the flag covered casket as they set off shots to signal his fall.

"I'm surprised they used the guns. You'd think they'd have enough of the sound." I mumbled, earning a punch from Jerry.

"Show some respect." he scowled and looked around. "Ma would beat you if she heard you say that here."

"Speaking of Ma…" Angle whispered and looked a few rows over. It still seemed surreal. Some days felt like a haze or a dream.

"Uh excuse me?" a voice from behind us said. We turned around to see an Asian man looking very uncomfortable. "Is Miss. Ravin with you by any chance?"

"Emilie? No, she's not." Jerry told him politely. The man nodded and looked around.

"When you see her again, could you tell her to call me? It's regarding the address she was asking about."

"What address?" I asked.

"She came by the other day and asked Green to look up an address for her. I kinda interrupted them by bringing a tape but he didn't seem to mind. He let her watch it and-" I cut his rambling off.

"She went to see Green?" I asked and the man nodded. "What video did you bring him?" The man looked even more uncomfortable now.

"I'm not sure if I can say." he stuttered.

"He let Emilie see it." Angel told him. The man sighed and walked a few feet away and looked at us.

"Fowler found out that Mrs. Mercer filed a report against the city but Green never saw it of heard of it." he told us.

"We know about the report." Jerry told him.

"We just got cameras installed in the filing room and Green asked for the tape from the day it was supposedly filed." the man told us. "I brought it to him and over heard him and Miss. Ravin talking about Fowler being the one that talked to your mother."

"Wait, Fowler's the dirty cop?" Jerry asked and the man nodded.

"Thank you for telling us and we're sorry about Green." I told him quickly. I waited until he left to look at my brothers.

"Emilie, knew Fowler was dirty. That's who Green was talking about yesterday, when he said he was protecting someone else and that'd he deal with it. He knew Fowler was dirty and he knew that Emilie knew too. It'd only be a matter of time before Fowler found out that they knew. Green's dead, how much you wanna bet Fowler killed him? And what makes you think he won't go after Emilie?" I growled. Jerry shook his head and held up his hands.

"Now, now Bobby, don't be jumping to conclusions." he started.

"We haven't seen Emilie since she got into that ambulance." I retorted.

"Paisley, saw her. She talked to her." Jerry fought back.

"How about we call and see if Paisley has seen her yet?" Angel yelled fishing for his phone. He pulled it out and I snatched it from him and dialed Jack's room number.

"Hello?" Paisley answered.

"Paisley, have you seen Emilie yet?" I barked through the phone.

"No, not-" she started.

"What did she say yesterday? When she left?" I asked. She was silent for a few seconds.

"I told you I sent-" she stuttered.

"Don't fucking lie to me. Emilie might be in danger. Tell me the fucking truth." I yelled.

"She said she needed to leave, she had things to do." she confessed.

"What things?" I asked.

"I don't know." she told me.

"When did she leave?" I asked and waved for the guys to follow me.

"About 5pm, maybe."

"Stay put. If you see her, call me. And do not, I repeat, do not leave Jack's side." I finished and hung up. I jumped into the front seat and waited for Angel and Jerry to get in.

"Where are we going?" Jerry sighed putting his seatbelt on.

"To Diddle's house." I told him shortly and started the car.

"Why?" he asked. I looked over at him and glared.

"Because Paisley lied. She didn't send Emilie home yesterday. She just left." I explained.

* * *

No one else said a word until we got to her place. We barreled through the stairwell and stopped at her door. I saw jerry fishing through his pockets and stop.

"She took our key." he sighed. Bobby smirked and pointed to the door.

"I think this counts as an emergency." he said and rammed the side of his arm into the side of the door, knocking it wide open.

"She's gonna be pissed." I chuckled as we walked in. The firs thing I noticed was a pair of Jack's shoes and jacket by the door.

"Looks like Jackie was getting cozy here." Bobby smirked at me.

"Yeah and when he wakes up, he'll be getting cozy with my foot up his ass." I grumbled and walked into the hallway. I made my way to her bedroom and pushed the door open slightly. I knew she wasn't there but she was always private about her room. I looked around and saw her bed was unmade, which was unusual for Emilie.

"Anything?" Jerry asked walking in behind Bobby.

"She hasn't been here since the shooting." I told them sitting on the side of her bed and rubbing my face.

"How do you know?" Bobby asked looking at the pictures on her dresser.

"The bed's unmade, both sides. So unless she is cheating on Jack, the last time she was here was with Jack." I explained. Bobby looked over at Jerry and both gave me odd looks.

"Did he just acknowledge they were dating?" Jerry teased talking Bobby. I shook my head and looked around.

"What now, Bobby?" I asked helplessly. "You think Fowler's got her?"

"Maybe. Paisley said she left about 5pm. Said Emilie had things to do." Bobby told us. I looked around and spotted a picture of her and Jack on her bedside table. It was her 18th birthday. Jack had rubbed cake in her face and she returned the favor. Ma was smitten with how they looked and needed a picture.

"She went to find Fowler." I whispered.

"Why would she do that?" Jerry asked. I stood up as the both looked over at me.

"Same reason we went after Ma's killers and Sweet." I told them. "She knew Fowler was the one that sent Ma to Sweet, he sent the killers after her and we got them. Sweet's not happy so he went after us. He went after Jack. Fowler was the start of all this. He started this domino effect."

"So where was Fowler yesterday after 5pm?" Bobby asked. I looked behind him to the TV and pointed. They turned and saw the bar that Green had been shot at.

"Well, let's go."

We left Emilie's place, closing the door as good as we could, and made our way down to Tony's Pub. I wasn't sure if we were on the right track thinking Emilie would go after Fowler but all that vanished when I looked at the side of the street.

"Whoa, whoa, isn't that Em's car?" I asked pointing to a care across the street. Bobby pulled over behind it and parked behind it. We got out and walked up to it.

"It's been stamped." Jerry said pointing out the yellow sticker. "It was dated last night. Cops probably slapped it on there after the shooting."

I looked across the street and saw the alley where Green had been shot.

"Jerry, call Camille and ask her to come pick the car up. Ya'll got a spare, right?" I asked.

"Yeah, Camille co-signed with her." he nodded and pulled out his phone.

"Bobby, come on." I waved and jogged across the street. We looked around the alley for anything to show she was here but found nothing except a dried puddle of blood.

"I gotta take a leak." Bobby groaned and started to the back door of the pub. I followed him and walked past him as he walked into the bathroom.

"Can I help you?" the bartender asked. I leaned on the counter and looked around.

"Uh yeah, yesterday, sometime after 5pm, did a young girl come in? Brown hair, real tiny?" I asked.

"I was off yesterday but Jose's still here. Let me get him." he said and walked off as Bobby returned.

"What are you doing? You're not supposed to be drinking, we got things to do." he barked.

"Just give me a minute." I told him as another guy walked up.

"You asking about the girl?" he asked.

"Yeah, brown hair, real tiny. She come in here?" I asked.

"Yeah, a little after 6pm. She asked about those two cops. I didn't know they were cops until I heard the news but she asked if they were here." he told us.

"Were they?" Bobby asked. I shot him a glare for asking a stupid question and the guy laughed.

"Yeah, they had a scuffle and went out back. That's where she went. Not five minute later the shots were heard." he sighed.

"Did she come back in?" I asked.

"Nope, I went out back after pushing my way through the crowd and saw that white cop leaning over his buddy. She was no where in sight." he finished.

"Thanks." I mumbled and walked off. We walked back outside and got back in the car with Jerry.

"Anything?" he asked.

"Yeah, Emilie was here. She was looking for Green and Fowler. Bartender saw her walk out back, heard the shots and then she was gone." Bobby told him.

"So what now?" Jerry asked. I looked back at him and sent him a dirty look.

"What do you mean 'What now?'?" I asked. "We're going to stop Sweet and get Emilie back in the meantime." I told him.

"You can't go to war with Victor Sweet. Not straight up. He'll just hire more and more goons until we are all dead." Jerry whined to me. I glared at him again and we looked over at Bobby, who just shook his head.

"I don't know. I don't know what to do anymore." he mumbled. "Jack might not make it and now Emilie's in danger. I just don't know anymore." We stared at him and I turned my head.

"I got an idea." Jerry announced, standing up.

"What?" I asked.

"We'll take the rest of the money from Mom's insurance, pay Sweet to call off the dogs." he explained. "He'll deal. He's a businessman."

"It doesn't count as a plan if it takes you longer to say it than it does to think it up." Bobby retaliated.

"Yeah, Jerry. Sweet will meet up with you, take your money. Won't be able to find your body till the river thaws." I told him.

"If you can get that far." Bobby mumbled. Jerry shook his head and looked at us.

"No, it will work. I just gotta talk to Evan." he said and grabbed his coat and left.

* * *

I knew what I was doing. Bobby and Angel didn't think so, but I did. This whole time I was against going after Sweet and his gang but Sweet crossed the line when she shot my little brother. Fowler pushed the line to when he took Emilie. There was no way I could just sit back and let Fowler hurt Emilie or let Sweet go after this. Jack and Emilie meant to much to me, they meant too much to each other. Emilie was family now. She helped me with Ma and the girls when Angel, Bobby and Jack left. She became the daughter Ma never had and the sister she never got to give us. She was the one that got to Angel, the one that got Bobby to show feeling and the one that showed Jack what real love was. Without knowing it she taught us as much as we taught her. How could I just give up on her when she needed us the most?

"Jesus, Jeremiah, what you doing here?" Evan hissed as she walked outside. He walked to every corner of the porch before looking back at me.

"I'm here to do a little collective bargaining." I told him calmly.

"What, with Sweet? Did you not get the message?" He asked. "He wants blood. That's not negotiable." he whispered, still looking around.

"Look, they told us we'd never get 30 an hour on the job either, right? But what we get? So

don't tell me this is not possible." I reminded him. "Come on, man." He looked at me for a minute and nodded.

"So, what you bringing to the table?" he asked.

"Four hundred thousand dollars." I offered.

"You sure about this Jerry?" he asked.

"I'm sure. Call him, Evan." I told him. He nodded and walked into the house for a minute. I waited outside and looked around feeling his paranoia rubbing off on me. A few minutes later he walked back out and sighed.

"4 o'clock. Be ready." he told me. I nodded and shook his head. I went to pull it back but he held on.

"Listen, Jerry, this might work and it might not." he told me slowly.

"I'm-" I started but he cut me off.

"If Fowler's there he won't agree. He's about as bad as Sweet. And Jerry-"

"He has Emilie." I finished. "We know."

"I'm sorry about all this, Jerry." he apologized.

"If you wanna apologize, make it up to me. Make it up to my family."

* * *

We finally looked at the house while we waited for Jerry. We stayed with him last night so we didn't get to see the real damage. And there was a lot of damage. Every window was broken, every wall was dotted with holes, pictures were broken. It was a gun shot purgatory.

"Yo." Jerry called. We looked down the hallway to see him walk through. "Evan called Sweet. He's going for it."

"So when's the meet?" Bobby asked.

"Four o'clock." he told us. I snapped my head to him.

"What?" I asked.

"Today?" Bobby gaped at him.

"Yeah." Jerry shrugged.

"That's in three hours." I said looking at my watch.

"Well, we ain't got no choice! Sweet's supposed to roll up on us any minute now." Jerry exclaimed.

"What? What else?" Bobby asked.

"Well, Evan, we cool. And he let me in on a little something. If Fowler's there, he don't think he's gonna go for it. He also knows that Fowler has Emilie." he told us slowly.

"So there's no plan!" Bobby yelled throwing his hands up in the air.

"Yes, there is, Bobby. We need to take Fowler out before the meet." I told him.

"We can't kill a cop even if he is dirty." Jerry told me.

"He handed Ma to Sweet, okay? And he has Emilie. He ain't walking away from this." Bobby yelled.

I was going to make damn sure of that.

* * *

I felt like I was going to die. My mouth was dry, my stomach was rumbling every five minutes, and I had to use the bathroom like no other. To add to all of that, my shoulder felt like it was about to fall right off. I hadn't heard anything else from him since he left me here earlier and I hoped he would come back soon.

"Oh Emilie!"

Looks like my wish is granted.

"Oh Miss. Ravin, you still there?" he sang and pushed through the door. "Oh yes, I tied you up. Of course you're still here."

I glared at him and watched him walk over to me.

"So how are ya? You like it up here? I find it pretty cozy." he smiled and pulled up another chair. I started making a muffling noise through the tape and hoped he'd take it off.

"Oh what is that?" he asked and cupped a hand over his ear. "You talking to me?" I made a softer sound to try and show him I wasn't being rude and he got it. He snatched the tape off my lips and I let out a tiny scream.

"Fuck!" I shrieked and moved my jaw around.

"What do you want?" he asked. I glared at him and cleared my throat.

"I need to use the restroom." I told him calmly. He stared at me for a second and stood up.

"Alright. But only because we're leaving in a few hours and I don't want you going in mine or Victor's trunk." he told me and untied my hands from the chair. He pulled me up and walked me to the bathroom in the attic. He pushed me into the bathroom and grabbed a few pieces of toilet paper. He laid it on the counter and bent down to my waist.

"What the fuck?!" I yelped and jerked back as his hands met my jeans.

"I'm not untying you." he smiled. "So if you gotta go, come here." I glared at him and was so tempted to tell him to go to hell but I had to go. I reluctantly stepped towards him and he smirked.

"Good girl." he winked and bent back down to my waist. I looked way as he unbuttoned me jeans and very slowly pulled my jeans down to my feet. I felt tears fill my eyes when I felt his hands rub my thighs.

"Ohh you're a fan of Victoria, huh?" he whispered and looked up at me. I cringed when he grabbed the straps of my panties and pulled them down. I sat down as soon as they hit the tops of my legs. He glared at me and stood up.

"Hurry." he barked and shut the door. I did my business and grabbed the toilet paper, that was a feat in itself. I stood up and tried to get my underwear up. I managed to pull them up but I couldn't get my jeans.

"You done?" he yelled through the door.

"Yes." I called back. He frowned when he walked in but picked my jeans up for me and buttoned them back. He flushed the toilet before walking me back to the chair.

"What meeting?" I asked when he finished tying my hands back.

"Oh those Mercer's are trying to pay Sweet off. They think it will give them a clean slate but they got another thing coming." he smiled. "So in about an two hours we'll be going for a ride and you'll get to see what Jerry looks like sinking to the bottom of the river."

With that he walked off and shut the door. I stared at the door and felt the tears fill up my eyes. I had a lot of hope in Bobby and them but now it was seeming hopeless. I still didn't even know if they knew where I was at. I didn't know if this would ever end.


	20. It's Jack

**Thanks to all that reviewed! It makes my day, really! Be aware that there are quite a few POV's here. Jerry, Angel, Em, Bobby and a couple parts in 3rd person.**

* * *

I left Jerry's house early enough to go find Fowler and immobilize him. Sweet would be rolling up at Jerry's any minute and I needed to have Fowler with me before it happened. We had it all planned out and as long as everyone did their job everything would go perfectly. Now all I needed was a decoy.

I looked around Fowler's neighborhood and heard the sound of metal hitting hard plastic. I turned toward the baseball field and saw one lonesome kid taking shots with a bat. I smirked at the box of Baby Ruth's in my hand and jogged over to the kid.

"Hey, kid!" I called out. "What you doing playing out here in the snow?"

"I'm just working on my swing for the spring." he told me and let the bat fall to his side. I chuckled and walked up to the fence.

"Hey, man, I need a big favor. I'll give you 20 and this whole box of Baby Ruth's." I offered and held it at the fence. He looked at me and the box and slowly walked over.

"You see that house over there?" I asked and pointed Fowler's house.

"Yeah." he nodded.

"Ya see I just got back from Iraq, I'm a marine, and he's an old buddy of mine. He don't know I'm coming and I wanna surprise him. I need you to go distract him for me. Think you can do that?" I asked. The kid looked over at the house and back at me.

"Sure." he agreed and walked over to the gate and walked out. "What do I say?"

"Just tell him your selling candy for the upcoming baseball season. Uniforms or something." I said and handed him the candy. "Thanks kid."

"Hey!" he called after I turned around. "Where's my money?" he asked. I laughed and pulled out a twenty from my pocket. I jogged across the street and cut between two houses a few yards away from Fowler's and crept through the back yard. I saw the kid walk into Fowler's yard and I stood by the back door.

I waited for him to knock before I jimmied the door open. I shut it softly and made my way through the kitchen and into the den.

"Thanks. Now get the hell out of here." Fowler grumbled and shut the door. As soon as he shut the door and draped the plastic bag I picked up around his head and held him to me.

"This is a big problem. A big problem for you." I hissed as he struggled in my grip. "Even a completely calm person will suffocate in four minutes without oxygen. And you're not exactly calm, are you?"

I forced him into the living room and pulled my belt off. I wrapped it around his neck and pulled out my phone and called Bobby.

"Angel?" he answered.

"Hey man, I got him." I told him.

"Is he out of the way?" he asked.

"What, you wanna ask him?" I asked.

"Let me hear his voice." Bobby asked.

"Hold on, let me put him on." I laughed and put the phone next to Fowler's face. "Hey, man, say hi to my brother." He let out muffled screams and I hung up with Bobby.

"You'll never get the belt." I chuckled as he scraped at his neck. "Trust me." His eyes widened and his hands ripped open the bag at his mouth.

"People never think to go for the bag. It's always the belt first for some reason. The bag has to be clear, though. Black doesn't work." I hissed and held the gun to his head. "Get up. Get over there right now." I ordered him to go to the couch.

"Where is she at?" I asked as he sat in the chair.

"Who?" he asked. I jammed the gun into his temple and looked around.

"Emilie!" I yelled and waited to hear something.

"Angel!" came the distant sound. "Angel!" I looked up when I heard the sound of banging on the roof. I yanked Fowler to his feet and drug him to the stairs.

"She's one pretty bitch, ya know?" he chuckled. "Nice underwear. Jack's a lucky guy." I pushed him against the wall and brought my fist across his face. He held his jaw and looked over at me before I finished walking upstairs.

"Angel! Help me!" she screamed again. I kicked the attic door open and sighed when I saw Emilie there. She smile widely when she saw me holding Fowler but I could still see the pain and fear in her eyes.

"Hey, Diddle." I smiled and pushed Fowler behind the chair. "Untie her." Fowler scowled at me and slowly undid the ties in her feet and hands. She leaped from the chair and faced Fowler.

"You son of a bitch!" she screamed. I flinched when I heard the sound of her palm hitting Fowler's cheek and laughed when he hissed and rubbed the red spot.

"Let's go." I said waving the gun to Fowler. We ushered him back downstairs and set him the chair. I sat on the coffee table and Emilie stood behind me.

"You can sit." I smirked at her. She glared at me and crossed her arms.

"I'm sick if sitting." she mumbled. "What's going on Angel?"

I looked at Fowler as he smirked and then at Emilie.

"Don't worry. We got it under control." I promised her. She nodded and looked around nervously before sitting behind me on the coffee table and laying her head on my shoulder.

* * *

Not too long after Angel left and we sent Camille and the girls off Evan rolled up in the driveway. Me and Bobby peeked out the window and I started pacing.

"Not till we hear from Angel." he reminded me. I looked down at my watch and sighed as the horn continued to beep outside. I paced the living room and saw a shadow at the door.

"Jerry! Jerry!" Evan called and rang the door bell.

"Fuck!" I cursed and bit my knuckles.

"We ain't going nowhere without the call, so just calm down." Bobby told me as the horn and door bell went off repeatedly.

"What the fuck you-?" I started.

"Jerry!" Evan sang through my door.

"Just keep stalling him." Bobby ordered.

"Hold! I'm grabbing my scarf, man. Hold on. I'll be there in a minute!" I yelled to Evan as Bobby's phone went off.

"Jerry, come on man." Evan whined.

"Angel? Is he out of the way? Let me hear his voice. We got you now, bitch." Bobby hissed into the phone.

"Hold on. I'm coming." I yelled waiting for Bobby to give me the go ahead.

"Go." Bobby signaled and left the room.

"Jerry, what the hell? You in there?" Evan yelled as I zipped my jacket up and grabbed the big duffle bag. I opened the door calmly and walked out.

"That's our money?" Evan asked.

"Yeah." I nodded and walked down the walkway. I jumped back into Evan when two guys walked to me.

"Hey, man, hey!" I exclaimed.

"Relax, relax." Evan told me.

"Hey, what is this, man? What is this?" I asked as they felt my body and jacket.

"Relax, relax. Just relax. We just gotta check it out, make sure you ain't strapped." Evan assured me. "Relax, relax."

"He's good." one of the guys said.

"Okay. Let's take a ride, Jerry." Evan nodded and walked me to the car. We drove in silence for a few minutes until Evan picked up his phone.

"Yeah, yeah, I got it. Well, he's onboard, boss. Yeah, all right." Evan mumbled and hung up.

"What did he say?" the guy in the passenger side asked.

"He said, 'Hurry the fuck up.' Then he hung up." Even told him shortly.

* * *

"He's gonna end up dead." she screamed at the police man behind the counter.

"Ma'am, ma'am, slow it down a gear." the officer said softly. Sofi shook her head and ignored him.

"And this isn't even his fight. It's his stupid brother's fault!" she exclaimed.

"I understand. I can help you." the man said trying to keep his cool. "But you're gonna have to let me know who it is we're talking about and what's about to happen."

"My boyfriend." she cried. "He was talking about killing a cop."

* * *

Words cannot describe how relieved I felt when I heard Angel's voice scream my name. Every bone in my body jumped into action and I strained to scream as loud as I could. I wanted to laugh in Fowler's face when Angel pushed him in the room holding a gun to his head. He was seriously underestimating the Mercer's and that's the last thing you should do. But as happy as I was that they had found me, I was confused. I tried to ask Angel about a plan of some sorts but he just told me that everything was under control. It didn't seem that way though when we heard the police sirens fill the air.

"You hear that? You know what that is?" Fowler smirked at us. "That's a damn beautiful sound. Those are my boys coming. No. It's not looking good for you, homeboy." he laughed. I walked over to the window and my hear beat as I saw at least 6 cops cars, a SWAT van and two under covers parked outside.

"We'll see if they're still your boys after they find out you killed your partner Green, homeboy." Angel smirked holding the gun to Fowler. I turned around and looked over at him. How would he convince them that Fowler did it? I was the only witness and I was associated with the Mercer's.

"That's your angle, huh? You gonna walk out there and tell them I killed Green. That's your story?" Fowler laughed

"It has the advantage of being true." Angel told him.

"It is true." I piped up.

"So what? I killed my partner. I could kill the whole damn police department if you two were

the only witnesses. They'd probably just promote me to chief. You're one of the Mercer brothers, brother. No cop in the world's gonna believe your word over mine. Sorry." He told us and proved my point. I looked over at Angel and waited for something that would make him eat his words.

"You know what? You're probably right. Other than the ones I got outside right now in the van listening to every bit of our conversation, brother." Angle told him. I smirked and relished the look on Fowler's face.

"You're lying." he accused.

"Afraid not." Angel smirked and opened his jacket. "Take a look." Angel said and nodded over to the window. They walked over next to me by the window and Fowler peeked out of the curtains to see the cops taking place.

"Okay, lieutenant, I'm bringing him out now." Angel said into the wire in his jacket. "Come on, man. It's all over." Angel said and nodded to the door. I saw Angel send me a look over Fowler's should and I stayed put. Fowler took a few steps and then grabbed Angel's arm. I gasped and ducked by the wall when Fowler snatched the gun from Angel and threw him on the floor.

"I'm gonna pop your head like a champagne cork." he hissed kneeling on Angel's back. "You hear me? I'm taking your clown down with me!" he yelled into the wire. He yanked Angle up to his feet and drug him to the door. I crawled over and looked out of it as he drug Angle across the porch.

"I swear to God, I'll kill him!" Fowler screamed. "You guys set me up, huh? You think you're real smart, getting this shit on tape, huh?" he yelled and held Angel out while pointing a gun at his co-workers. I looked at the police and saw them look at each other confused. Was this the plan?

"Back off! I'm serious!" he continued to yell.

"Fowler, what are you doing, man? Drop the goddamn gun! We're here to help you!" one cop stood up and yelled out to him.

"Back off now! I'm serious!" he screamed.

"That's right. Fowler, put down your weapon!" another cop yelled.

"Not a chance! I said, back off! Now!" he yelled and fired a few shots at the cars. I saw the officers take cover and Angel elbowed Fowler in the stomach and then punch him. Fowler went flying back and aimed the gun at Angel when he was up. I was about to scream when another shot sounded and Fowler's leg was shot. He turned to aim the gun at the cops again and they fired. Fowler sank to the ground as the bullet pierced his chest.

"He's down! Man down! Man down! EMS! Call it in!" the cops yelled. I walked down the porch and over to Angel as he walked to Fowler. We kneeled down next to him an smirked. I pulled Angel up and out of the way as the police surrounded Fowler.

* * *

I looked out the window as we drove to the outside of Detroit and made our way to the river. Everything was covered in snow and it was deserted until I saw a black SUV and a few mew standing outside.

"So, what do we do now?" I asked looking over at Evan.

"We get out." he told me. We piled out of the car and when I got to the front of the truck I heard chainsaws and saw them cutting into the ice.

"Jesus Christ! What is that? Wha-What's that?" I asked taking a step back.

"It's ice fishing. Tommy there is part Eskimo." Evan joked and they laughed. I took a few steps forward and looked back at Evan before walking to the group. We waited for a few minutes until we saw Sweet's SUV pull up. He crawled out of the back and walked over to me. I wanted nothing more that to smack that smirk off his face.

"Jeremiah Mercer. Businessman." he greeted. Give me that." he said snatching the bag from me. He laid it on the ground and unzipped it, looking at the money. He looked at a stack and then looked up at me.

"Goddamn it, I like the way you do business! You're a reasonable man. You should have let me in on your project. We could have been partners. Could have been a sweet deal for both of us. Now it just a sweet deal for me." he laughed and zippped the bag up.

"Come on, man. We gonna do business, or what?" I asked looking down at him. He peered up and me and nodded.

"Right." he mumbled and stood up. "Right. Right. Down to business. What were the- What were the terms again? You give me grand, and I pardon you and your brothers, is that right? Forgive and forget, right?" he asked looking at me.

"That's right." I nodded. "My brothers said I was naive. That you would shoot me and just take the money. Yeah." I told him.

"Damn, man, you hurt my feelings." he laughed.

"Good. Because you don't know shit about hurt feelings. I just buried my mama and I might have to bury my brother." I seethed. "And I think that's payment enough, Vic."

"You been doing a lot of thinking, boy." he growled.

"Yeah, my mama raised me to be a thinking man. So me and my brothers, we came up with a whole new proposal." I told him and saw the guys start to move around.

"A whole new proposal?" Sweet asked. "Is that right?"

"Yes, sir. Yes, sir. You gonna like it too. Because it is a-- A sweet deal." I told him. "Check it out. Instead of giving you the grand, we decided we'd give it to these mistreated workers you got standing behind you."

"Pistol." he said holding up his hand. "Evan, I said pistol!" he yelled.

"Uh, no, bitch. The one thing you forgot about me is this: I was in the union for a long time. I ain't never missed no meetings." Evan smirked.

"He ain't lying." I agreed. "It's cold out here when you by yourself, ain't it?"

"So, what now? You gonna kill the hand that's been feeding you? Over some stupid old lady?" Sweet yelled.

"Watch your motherfucking mouth." I warned.

"You dumb shits! I told Fowler and his pals all about this meeting! You kill me, you all go down! Murder! He's already late. Shit, he's probably on his way right now." he yelled turning and looking at all the men surrounding him.

"He ain't coming." I told him. He turned to look at me and I smirked at him. No this was not his day.

"Come on now. Who's gonna do it, huh? Who the man here, huh? Which one of you tough guys gonna do it? Who's gonna take on the champ?" he exclaimed hitting his chest. "You, Charlie?"

"Yeah. That's right." I smirked when Sweet's eyes landed on the figure walking to us.

"Is this who I think it is? Is this what you all been waiting on?" he asked looking around. I nodded as me and the guys started clapping as Bobby came into view. This was going to be fun.

* * *

I walked up to the group of men and Jerry met me at the front.

"You all right, Jerry?" I asked.

"Yeah, I'm straight." he smirked.

"Oh, Bobby Mercer. Back in town. You gonna be the one, man?" Sweet smiled and shrugged his jacket off. I threw mine to the side and tucked my rosary in my shirt.

"Come on, Bobby." Jerry cheered and stepped back as I walked over to Sweet. I flexed my arms and got all the kinks out as the men crowded around us.

I stared at him and tried to block out all the cheers as we started to circle one another. I took a swing at him and he ducked. I took another and he moved. I started to stumble and he took his first shot, hitting me in the mouth.

"Get your ass up! Come on!" Sweet yelled as I fell to the ground. I stood up and shook it off.

"All right, you got him! You got him!" Jerry chanted. I nodded and regrouped myself and took another shot at him. My fist connected with his nose and he stumbled back into the group. He smirked and regained composure and as he was about to come at me again, my fist met his nose one more time.

"Get back. Get back." Sweet yelled and waved an arm to the crowd. I took another shot at him but he pushed my arm away and shove me. His fist came flying across my face again and I fell back.

"That's it!" he yelled and brought his foot into my ribs. I groaned and grabbed my stomach as I tried to get up. I was on my knees when he tackled me back down to the ice and slid very close to the hole. He flipped me over and started chocking me.

"All right, come on, man." Jerry cheered. I rolled him off of me and rolled my back onto his and tried to wiggle out of his grasp.

"Elbow, baby, elbow!" Evan yelled. I stopped moving for a second and lifted my elbow up and crashed it into Sweet's side. He let go of my neck and I started to move but he tried to grab me again. I used my elbow again to hit him in the nose and stood up.

"Fucker! Hey, get up, bitch!" I yelled as he tried to get up. I hit him in the jaw and waited for him to get up. When he did I sucker punched him in the back, making him fall into Evan.

"Motherfuck!" Sweet yelped.

"Get your bitch ass back in there!" Evan laughed and threw him back to me. I head butted him as he came flying towards me then kneed him in the abdomen. I took three more punches until he fell back into the snow and didn't move.

Everyone quieted as we looked at him laying on the ground, bloody nose and mouth, and all alone. He wasn't top dog anymore, he was below everyone else. The past few weeks of hell he put us through flashed through my mind as we stared at him.

"Get him in the hole." I told them. I grabbed my jacket and watched them throw him in the hole before turning around.

"So, what we gonna do about the police?" Jerry asked as we walked off.

"Police? Cops love the Mercers, Jerry." I told him.

* * *

**Bobby's Interrogation**

"Sit him down." the cop yelled and threw him into desk.

"Damn! You girls are trying to kill me!" Bobby screamed holding his head.

"Let me ask you again." the cop said as Bobby squinted from the bright light. "What happened to Victor Sweet, Mercer?" he asked.

"Ellis, you might wanna close your ears. This is nasty shit." Bobby warned him.

"From about 5:30 p.m. till 11 about or so last night, I was banging that pretty little wife of yours,

okay? It's the tru-" Bobby said casually as the other cop walked over and smacked him.

"We got you, Mercer." the cop yelled.

"That true? What do you got now?" Bobby asked. The cops had his head pinned to the table and they waved a little baggy in his face.

"Your hair, scumbag! Taken off Victor Sweet's dead body." the cops yelled. Bobby let out a menacing laugh and looked at the baggy.

**Angel's Interrogation**

"What are you doing, man?" Angel yelled as the cop slapped the back of his head. "All right!"

"That's what you wanna hear?" Angle yelled into the microphone. "I did it. I did it, okay?"

"If you did it, then I wanna hear you say it!" the cop yelled and pointed to the recording box. Angel smirked and held onto the table.

"I was bumping uglies with your wife." Angle laughed moving in his seat, earning a backhand form the detective.

**Jerry's Interrogation**

A fist came across Jerry's face as one cop held him back.

"You wanna go another round, huh?" the hitting cop asked. "What happened to Sweet? Where were you last night?"

"Your mama, she wasn't good the first time." Jerry smirked and grunted when another fist met his face.

* * *

After the scene at Fowler's the cops took me and Angel to the station. I was surprised when they weren't worried about the incident with Fowler but apparently, Sweet was dead, and they drug Angel into an upstairs interrogation room. I went ahead and called Sofi and Camille up here incase anything bad happened and they got there in record time.

"You arrested him, and he didn't do anything!" Camille yelled. "Where's my husband?"

"He didn't do anything." Sofi yelled. The poor man at the desk was so flustered with both of them yelling at him he didn't know what to do.

"His name is Jeremiah Mercer, and I wanna see him now!" Camille demanded and Sofi nodded. I was leaned against the wall and gasped when Jerry, literally, came flying out of one of the rooms.

"Don't push him like that!" Camille yelled and ran over to him while Sofi cried at the desk. I looked by Jerry and Camille to see Angel walk out of the elevator. Sofi noticed and ran over to him.

"Oh, baby! Oh, my God! Are you okay?" she gushed over him. He sent me an annoyed look and I smiled.

"I'm okay, baby." he assured her.

"They bought it, baby. They bought it." she smiled and hugged him. While we were waiting Camille and Sofi filled me in on the blanks. They told me Angel meant to let Fowler get the upper hand, that Sofi had 'ratted' him out, and that Jerry and Bobby turned Sweet's men against him.

"Let me see. Come here." Camille gushed and helped Jerry up from the floor.

"It's all right." Jerry mumbled.

"Let me see." she demanded.

"It's just a boo-boo." he told her and looked over at me.

"It's not just a boo-boo! Somebody put their fist in your eye!" Camille exclaimed. I gave him a wink and laughed. "Let me see it!"

"Come on, now." Jerry groaned and I looked over at Angel.

"Are you okay?" Sofi asked again.

"Yeah, I'm all right." Angel told her.

"Oh, my God. You're bleeding, baby." Sofi shrieked.

"You know I can take a punch." Angel smirked.

"I know you can take a punch." Sofi laughed and leaned up to kiss him. I rolled my eyes and looked back over at Camille and Jerry.

"Baby, you don't talk about peoples mamas!" Camille hissed.

"Well, he talked about mine." Jerry defended.

"Did you get some licks in?" she asked switching gears.

"Of course." he sighed.

"Does his eye look like yours?" she asked. I walked over and looked at them.

"Hey, guys, where's Bobby?" I asked. And like clockwork…

"Let me catch you on the street without that badge. I'll smack that smirk off your face,

Punk!" Bobby yelled to the cop than escorted him out.

"I'm gonna smack you, Bobby." Camille threatened. "I told you not to let Jerry get hurt."

"He's breathing." Bobby told her. "You all right, Jerry?" he asked.

"I'm all right, man." Jerry nodded. Bobby looked past him and walked over to me. He pulled me into a tight hug and buried his face in my neck.

"I'm so sorry, Diddle." he whispered.

"No, I'm sorry. I should have known better." I whispered and looked at him. "I was just so hurt. I wanted him to pay." I confessed. He nodded and pulled me over to the desk.

"Let me get my property." he yelled banging his fist on the desk. Jerry came up next to me and put an arm around me while Angel stood on the other side of Bobby.

"Man, you all right?" Angel asked.

"I'm good." Bobby nodded. Angel looked over at Jerry as he wiped his eye off.

"You said something, didn't you, Jerry?" Angle asked.

"I did not say nothing, man. Why you always-?" Jerry sighed.

"I did." Bobby cut it. We stared at him and all spoke at the same time.

"What you say?"

"I told him I was banging his wife." Bobby told us. He looked at us and we all laughed.

"Come on, man!" Bobby yelled again from the desk. Neither Jerry or Angel spoke for a few seconds but I knew it was coming.

"I did too." Angel confessed.

"Me too." Jerry nodded and looked over at them. I shook my head and leaned over on Bobby. He finally got his stuff and we were able to leave.

"Emilie, I'm going to get the girls, you wanna come stay with us and relax?" Camille asked. I looked at her and smiled.

"No thanks. I'm gonna ride with Bobby to the hospital." I told her. I was about to walk to Bobby's car when Paisley's Honda pulled up and stopped in the middle of the street. She jumped out the car and looked frantic.

"I've been trying to call all of you!" she screamed, on the verge of tears.

"Our phones were with the cops." Bobby told her.

"Pais, what's wrong?" I asked. She looked over at me and shook her head.

"It's Jack." she whispered and let her tears fall.


	21. Cryin'

**Okay here it is! The answer to THE question! Thanks for all teh GREAT reviews and thanks for sticking with me! Enjoy!**

* * *

He almost couldn't stand to look at her. Once again she was dressed in all black and crying. She had mascara and eyeliner smudged under her eyes, her nose was red, and her cheeks were puffy. She had been crying for about half an hour non-stop. To add to that Amelia and Daniella couldn't stop crying either. Both had cried themselves to sleep the night before and I think that broke Emilie's heart more. To see the girls that heartbroken tore her up even more. It hurt me too. The last thing I wanted to see was Emilie and the girls hurt like this.

"The service is about to start girls." Camille said walking up to us. It was eerie seeing everyone in all black again. Why did black have to be that depressing?

"Go on girls. I'll be there in a minute." Emilie sniffed and wiped her face. I sighed and walked over to her. "I'll be okay." she cried. I nodded and pulled her into my chest.

"Come on, let's get this over with." I whispered and kissed the top of her head. He walked her over the thick green grass and over to the hole that was dug. Everyone stood around it looking down. Camille and Jerry holding the girls to their sides, Angel leaning on a tree with Sofi and me holding Emilie's hand as we made it to the spot. The girls were a little mad that they couldn't have a bigger ceremony but Camille said that family was enough, family was all that mattered.

The service was short but sweet. Emilie and the girls got chocked up as Angel and Jerry helped lower him in and cover it up. I never realized how final all this was. I felt Emilie shake beside me and I pulled her closer. I saw a teary eyed Camille ask the girls if they were ready to go home and they nodded. Everyone embraced before we left.

Emilie was silent as she drove to the house. She seemed a little more calm but still looked distraught.

"You okay?" I asked. She nodded and little and sniffed a few times.

"I'm good." she whispered. "It's just sad."

"I know. It'll get better." I sighed and looked out the window. "Ya know I really don't see the big deal. He's in a better place, why be sad?"

Emilie snapped her head over to me and pulled the car over. She turned it off and stared at me like I had just grown a third head.

"Tell me you did not just say that?" she whispered.

"I did." I told her.

"He was family!" she hissed and sat back in her seat. "I cannot believe you could be so hateful."

"What?" I asked. "He was just a-a little scruffy runt. He's better off. He just couldn't handle the streets of Detroit." I told. I knew I was about to get smacked but I had to. This was all ridiculous. It was a freaking circus.

"He was more than that. He couldn't help that he was caught off guard." she defended. I sighed and shook my head. This was beyond crazy now. It was just hilarious. I earned my slap when I started laughing. I rubbed my arm and smiled over at her.

"Emilie! It's a freaking dog. He died. Oh well." I laughed. She got teary eyed again and glared at me.

"Jack! He was more than a dog. Louie meant a lot to the girls and to me. You just don't understand." she mumbled and started the car again. "If you really didn't care you should have just stayed at home with Bobby."

"Well, next time one of Amelia's mutt's dies, I will stay home." I chuckled.

She didn't speak to me the rest of the way home and for a minute I thought she was going to leave me in the car.

"I thought you were going to leave me for a minute there." I grinned as she pulled my crutches from the backseat of the car. She glared at me and handed them to me so I could get out.

"I might be mad, Jack, but I won't leave you to fend for yourself. I'm not Bobby." she smirked. I laughed and stood on the sidewalk so she could close my door. She started to walk away after she closed it but I caught her arm in time. She couldn't get but grin as I pulled her over to me. Her hands went to my chest and she looked up at me.

"Yes?" she asked coyly. I leaned down and her lips met mine halfway in a kiss. She moaned into my mouth as our tongues mingled. A kiss being the only action we had gotten since I woke up.

It had been almost a month now and I still wasn't cleared for 'strenuous activity' yet. It was killing me and her but we were making it. The last trip I had to the doctor he said I was starting to heal faster I might be able to loose the crutches in a week or two. My shoulder was doing good too. It was a little sore still but I could use it more now. I tried my best to convince Emilie that if she took over we could have a little fun but she said she was afraid she'd hurt me. I dropped it after an hour long fight. I figured it would kill me anyways, I liked being in control most of the time.

"I love you." I whispered when I pulled back. She smiled up at me and leaned up to kiss me.

"I love you, too." she whispered against my lips.

"Get your asses in the house!"

* * *

We both groaned and I flattened my feet to the ground and looked at Bobby in the door way. We had since fixed the house and though there were a few tiny things to fix, we got it done in record time. I still stayed at my place sometimes but I mainly stayed at the house so I could be with Jack. His crutches and too many stairs didn't go so well at my place. The down fall was Bobby and Angel.

Neither one would let us leave their sight. They had gotten really paranoid after Jack was released and it was starting to take it's toll.

"I'm going to kill him. Both of them." Jack growled and pulled away from me. I wasn't sure why Bobby and Angel were trying to hard to protect us now but they were weird. Angel and Bobby won't even touch me. I tried to give Angel a hug one day and he jumped. And Bobby's tried to give me a hug but pulled away at the last minute. It was quite aggravating.

"Want some help?" I smiled as we walked up the steps. He laughed and we walked into the living room. I helped him sit on the couch and took his crutches. "You thirsty?" I asked.

"Yeah, get me a beer please." he nodded. I walked into the kitchen and grabbed him a beer and me a soda. When I was walking back out Angel was walking in the front door.

"Why did you leave?" he yelled. I was stunned. "Answer me!" he yelled. I tried to open my mouth and say something but nothing would come out. I looked at him as tears filled my eyes.

"What the hell Angel?" Jack yelled walking into the foyer. I was going to yell at him for not being on his crutches but I couldn't, I just walked over to him and buried my face in his chest.

"What's going on?" Bobby asked walking up from behind Jack. I barely looked at him over Jack's shoulder but he knew I was crying.

"Angel comes in and just starts yelling at her. Scared her to fucking tears." Jack seethed rubbing my back.

"I didn't mean to." Angel sighed. "She left before I did." he told Bobby.

"What does it matter?!" I turned around and yelled and both men. "Ever since Jack got out you two have been crazy. You won't come near me, you won't talk to me, and you drive me a Jack crazy. What the hell? Sweet is dead. So is Fowler. What's the danger?" I yelled. Jack held my waist with one hand, making sure that if I did move I'd make him fall.

"Nothing. We just want to make sure you two are safe." Bobby defended.

"Safe from what? Is there something you're not telling us?" Jack asked. "And what does that have to do with not talking to Emilie. Both of you have ignored her since I've been awake."

"There's nothing to worry about." Bobby told us and started to walk off. I grabbed his arm and waited for him to move my hand. When he went to touch it he stopped and just jerked his arm away.

"What did I do?" I whispered looking at him and Angel, both looked away. "You won't even look me in the eye." I felt tears fall down again and moved back into Jack's arms.

"He told me, Diddle." I heard Angel whisper. I looked back at him and saw the sadness in his face.

"Who told you what?" I asked harshly.

"Fowler. He told me-" he stopped.

"We know he fucking touched you!" Bobby yelled out of nowhere. My jaw dropped and Jack pushed me back to hold me at arms length.

"He did what?!" he yelled at me. I moved form his grip and turned to Bobby and Angel.

"What?" I asked.

"When I was coming upstairs. Fowler made the comment about what kind of, of-" Angel stuttered and pointed to my jeans. "Underwear you wear." he whispered.

"Did he fucking touch you?" Jack yelled. I looked back at him and saw an anger I had never seen before. "You didn't fucking tell me this, Emilie."

"Maybe she was scared." Angel defended. Jack shot him a glare.

"Again, I'm the only one whose had the guts to look at her or talk to her this past month. She'd tell me!" he yelled back.

"Her boyfriend?" Bobby laughed out loud then got serious. "You'd think she'd tell you if some guy touched or raped her?" he yelled.

"Yeah, you would be the last person she told, you're hurt." Angle piped up.

This whole time I stood between the three of them as they yelled back and forth over my head about something they had no idea about. No one took the time to ask me and no on seemed to care. I covered my ears and closed my eyes before opening my mouth and letting out a high pitched scream. I held it for as long as I could and then stopped. I opened my eyes and saw all three men covering their ears. Jack opened his eyes first and looked over at me. He knew I was upset because all the anger was gone out of his eyes.

"Babe." he whispered. I held my hand up to silence him and turned to Bobby and Angel.

"So that's why you haven't talked to me? Why you haven't looked at me?" I hissed, tears threatening to spill from my eyes. "Because you think Fowler touched me?" I asked.

"He knew what kind-" Angel started.

"Shut up!" I screamed and pointed my finger at them both. "If that's the way you'd act around someone that was sexually assaulted, you both are worthless pieces of shit."

"We thought you needed space." Bobby spoke up, softly.

"That's not giving me space! That's abandoning me." I screamed. All three men stayed quiet and only Jack was brave enough to speak after a minute or so.

"Did he touch you?" he asked. I kept staring at Bobby and Angel as I answered him.

"Not in that way. I needed to go to the bathroom and he wouldn't untie me. So I sucked it up and let him help me get my jeans off. He started to pull my underwear down and I sat before he could-" I stopped and let a few tears fall. "He stared and scarped the edge of my thigh, that's it. He didn't get any kind of view or do any kind of sexual assaulting. He was just being an ass." I explained.

I'm sorry I yelled at you, babe." Jack whispered. I stared at Angel and Bobby for a few more seconds before grabbing my keys and looking at Jack.

"Come on." I told him.

"Where are-" Bobby started.

"None of your fucking business." I hissed at him and helped Jack out the door. It was time me and Jack got some peace.

* * *

I knew better than to talk to her at this point. I knew her too well. She didn't want to talk, she wanted silence. She wanted to know that everything was okay and that nothing needed to be said. So I kept quiet. If I had anything at all to say, I'd ask later but I was not going to bug her about it now. It was like the day I woke up. She wanted peace and quiet.

_I laid there after the doctor's poked and prodded me. I had woken up to find Paisley here and she ran off to find a doctor then ran off to find Emilie and my brothers. It didn't long for them to get back. _

_They all piled into the room and crowded around the bed but the only one I didn't see was Emilie. Angel, Jerry and Bobby were shouting and laughing that I was okay and when Sofi moved I could finally see her. She was leaning on the door frame, looking over at me. I crooked my finger and beckoned her over. Jerry saw what I did and realized that they had bummed rushed Emilie out the way. He moved over and let her sit on the side of the bed. She took one of my hands in hers as my other went up to her face. I saw the tears spill over as she smiled at me. We didn't say a word but after a few moments she started to get aggravated._

_"Hey!" she yelled as softly as she could and everyone stopped talking to look at her. "could you just hush please?" she begged. "Hush or leave."_

_She looked back down at me and kissed the palm of my hand as it slid down her face. We didn't notice when everyone left us alone. We both wanted to cry while telling each other how worried we were and how much we loved each other, but we really didn't need to. They might have gone unspoken but that didn't mean they weren't said._

After a long trip up the stairs to her apartment we were finally where we wanted to be.

Alone. Alone and in her big comfy bed.

"I missed this." she whispered and drew circles on my bare chest. I smiled down at her and ran my thumb over her cheek.

"Me too." I agreed and kissed her head. We laid there for a while listening to the soft music playing from the radio. I'd run my fingers through her hair and she'd trace images on my chest, I'd lightly swat at her when she got to my ribs. But it was silent, perfect.

"I heard you." I whispered to her. I looked up at the ceiling and continued when I didn't feel her look up at me. "In the snow and in the ambulance, I heard you."

Her finger stopped moving on my chest and she laid still.

"I heard you screaming to come get me. I heard you begging me to stay…" my voice cracked and I looked own when I felt something fall on my chest. I saw her closed squeezed shut and the tears spilling out of them. I pulled her up and made her face me.

"I was so scared Jack. I thought I had lost you." she cried. I cupped her face with my hands and wiped her tears away.

Truth was, I was afraid I had lost her too. I thought I had let her down. I promised I'd never leave and I was afraid I was doing just that. After the second shot it got really hazy but I do remember her being with me in the ambulance and holding my hand. It made me fight all the more too. I couldn't leave her.

"I'm sorry, baby." I whispered. She shook her head and sniffed.

"It's no ones fault. I hate that it happened but it did." she whispered and looked up at me. "But you're okay. You're home, I'm home. It's okay now. Everything worked out in the end."

"Yes, it did." I smiled. "Can I ask you something?" I asked slowly. She tilted her head and smiled.

"I would have told you if he touched me more than he did." she whispered. "I couldn't keep something that like from you." I smiled and leaned up to kiss her.

"Thank you." I smiled. She looked at my watch and smiled before sitting up on the bed.

"Take a bath with me. Let's just relax. " she said and moved to get off the bed. I raised my brow and looked own at my left leg.

"It's going to be hard to get comfy with this." I told her. She shook her head and held her hands out.

"I got this covered." she smiled and pulled me up. She got me to my feet and left the room real quick. She came back with a few plastic bags and tape. I laughed when she helped me to the bathroom and sat me on the toilet. I shook my head the whole time she wrapped my cast up and admired her work.

"It's gorgeous!" she clapped and started the bathwater.

"And how are we going to do this, exactly?" I asked as the water filled the big garden bath tub.

"Well, you're going to get in first and rest your leg on the rise." she smiled and pointed to the tiny ledge. "And I will make my self comfy wherever I can."

"Alright, whatever you say." I laughed. She turned the faucet off and smirked at me.

"I say get undressed."

I grinned and stood up to peel my shirt off. She walked over and helped me get my shorts off and I slowly stepped in the tub as she got undressed. I laid back and set my foot off to the side, hoping it didn't get wet. I looked up at Emilie as she crawled into the tub and settled herself between my legs and laid her back on my chest.

"See? Told you it work. It's not that hard." she sighed. I wrapped my arms around her and laid my head back.

"Yeah, don't rub it in, Em." I laughed.

* * *

I laughed and looked up at him.

"I wasn't. I was just saying." I smiled and snuggled back into his chest. I smiled contently as we laid there in the warm tub, relaxing. No Bobby, no Angel, no Sofi, no problems.

"I love this." I sighed.

"God, me too." Jack chuckled. "You do realize that now that we are here, I'm not leaving. My leg is sore from the stairs." I turned to look at him and glared.

"Why didn't you say anything?" I asked.

"Because we needed to get out of my house, desperately. I'd rather be locked in your's than be over at mine." he laughed. I nodded and turned back around.

"If it keeps it up let me know. We'll need to tell the doctor." I told him. I shivered when he kissed the back of my neck.

"Yes, ma'am." he whispered. I grinned and leaned back into him more. I snaked my hand around the back of his head and played with his hair as he kissed my neck. I was about to protest when his hands drifted down my stomach and towards my legs, but his other hand grabbed my chin and pulled me in for a rough kiss. I tightened my grip on his hair as his hand sank further down my body and deeper into the water.

I knew the past month had been hard on us. We go through the most heart wrenching time of our lives and the last thing we can do is be intimate with one another. Luckily, we did love each other so just being there for each other helped but now it was getting to both of us.

I moaned into his mouth feeling his fingers started to caress me. I felt him smirk against my lips and I pulled him closer to deepen the kiss. My body jerked a little when his fingers entered me. It felt like I hadn't been touched in forever. The kiss became even more hungry than before as he moved his fingers inside me. Even though it was far from what we both wanted, just the slightest most intimate touch set off a million different emotions. One being the desire to be with him again and another being the emptiness of knowing that if he had died that day, I'd never feel his touch or his kiss again. This made me want it all the more. To cherish it as it was the last time.

"Jack." I breathed, pulling away from his kiss. His grip was tight as he held me close to his body, not wanting me to move or go anywhere. I moved my hips to met his hand as the heat started to rise in the pit of my stomach. I licked my lips and panted as his fingers moved quicker. I felt his lips behind my ear and he nipped and sucked on my neck. My hand moved to his wrist when he added another finger but he grabbed it and pinned it to the bottom of the tub.

"Stop it." he growled and continued moving. I groaned and scraped the bottom of the tub as I felt him slowly push me over the edge.

"Jack, please." I gasped and ran my free hand behind his neck. He sent me a small smirk before pressing his lips to mine. I greedily sought his tongue and gripped his hair. My back arched and I shook as he brought me to my peak. He held me tight and kissed me until I was done. I peeled my lips from him as whined a little when his fingers left me. We sat there for a few minutes. Sneaking kisses and tangling our fingers in each others hair. It wasn't until our fingers started to get wrinkly and the water cold, that we decided to get out.

I stood up from the tub, earning a smirk from Jack, and grabbed a towel to wrap around me. After I had it secured I helped him out and handed him a towel. We dried off before we walked over to the bed. I pulled out my night dress and slipped it over my head as Jack stepped into his boxers. I pulled the covers back and looked over at Jack. He grinned and laid down in the middle of the bed. I smiled and crawled next to him, laying my head on his chest and closing my eyes.

"I love you, Em." he whispered, playing with my hair. I nuzzled his chest and kissed it softly before looking up at him.

"I love you too, Jackie." I smiled. He ran a thumb over my cheek and laid his head back. I sighed and closed my eyes. The last thing that ran through my mind was the thought that if we survived this we could survive anything. Almost looking him made me realize how much I need him, how much I love him. It also made me realize that I'd to whatever it took to keep him safe, to keep us together. And that he would do the same. That was a happy and a scary thought at the same time.

* * *

**AHHH did I have ya going there for a moment? :)**

**Anywho, I have most of the next chapter done. I'm working on it as we speak and it will be up soon. It's kind of a second part. The address will be revealed soon. It's all leading up to it. I have the next four chapters outlined and I hope you all enjoy it. Jack and Emilie aren't going anywhere anytime soon! And it feels so good to get back to writing my stuff instead of add tid bits of my stuff to the movie...lol. I felt like I haven't really written anything for this in a while...lol. But thanks for sticking with me. **

**Long live Jack Mercer! LOL**


	22. Casts and Malls

**Thanks for all the reviews! Glad I had some of you fooled...lol. **

**Straight Edge Queen- Thanks! :)**

**BEG75- Yes, this is what you do to us with MOB!!**

**lemmonpie- Thanks! Glad you liked it!**

**Berries-R-Blue- Yes, it was apoor Louie. Jack wasn't very compassionate was he? LOL**

**MissIndependent101- I had to keep leading you all on for at least the first part...lol. Glad you liked it!**

* * *

_I heard the faint whispers of a man and a woman. I wasn't sure what they were saying and I didn't know who they were, they sounded so far away. I groaned and tried to pry my eyes open as the male's voice got closer._

_"That's it, Jack. Open your eyes." the made told me. I froze when a tiny whimper filled the room. _

_"Em?" I croaked. I heard a short laugh as I finally open my lids. I blinked a few times and let my eyes adjust to the light in the room. I looked around and noticed I was in a hospital bed with tubes going in and out of me. I looked over to the corner where I had heard the man's voice and I froze when Fowler stepped from the shadows, holding Emilie. He had her pressed to him with a knife to her neck._

_"Hello, Jackie boy." he grinned sadistically. Emilie looked over at me sadly and I tried to get up but I couldn't. I looked down and my arms and legs were in restraints._

_"Let her go." I managed to choke out. Fowler laughed and moved closer to the bed. I felt the bed jerk a little the he moved Emilie's knee's into the end of my bed._

_"Now, now Jack. Don't get to worked up. You need to relax and stay calm." he told me. I glared at him and watched tears fall down Emilie's cheeks._

_"She didn't do anything to you. Just let her go." I pleaded with him. He smirked and tucked his knife away and grab a fist full of her hair._

_"No, she hasn't done anything to me…" he said and looked at her. "Yet." She let out a sob as he pushed her over the bed rail and pressed her head into the bed. I looked at him as he rubbed himself against her as she lay bent over. _

_"Let her go, Fowler." I warned._

_"Why? So you can get her back and let some other punk get to her? You're worthless. Blame yourself for this, Mercer. You've been nothing more than a fuck up and you will never amount to any more than that. She deserves better than you." he hissed. Fowler yanked her up by the hair and pulled her back to him._

_"I swear to God, Fowler, if you don't fucking let her go, I will kill you!" I seethed. _

_"Aww don't act like you care now, Jackie." he smirked and nuzzled the side of Emilie's face. "She's in good hands." he winked. I saw her face contort with horror and I watched as Fowler's hand slowly made it's way down to front of her pants. _

_"Stop it!" I yelled as she cried out. I saw the front of her pants move and I knew he wasn't faking. I looked up at him as he licked his lips and sighed._

_"Oh, so wet and so tight." he moaned. I leaned up as far as I could and pulled the restraints._

_"Stop touching her! Stop it!" I screamed in vain. _

_All of a sudden the lights were gone except for one, right above Emilie. She looked at me with hollow and empty eyes._

_"Diddle." I whispered._

_"You promised, Jack." she cried. "Even after death." _

_I screamed and yelled as I watched as she disappeared. I stopped when I felt my chest tighten. My hands were free when I grasped my gown and tried to even my breathing. I saw the doctors and nurses run in and lay my back on the bed. _

_I can't leave her, I won't leave her. She needs me, I can't let her down. I have to prove her wrong. Please, please don't let me die…_

_I felt my eyes start to close and a bright light washed over the room again._

_"Jackie." a voice cried. I opened my eyes, surprised to find it was so easy and looked around. I wasn't in the hospital anymore, it looked like…_

_Heaven._

_I looked down at myself and saw I was wearing all white. I turned around and saw Ma._

_"Ma?" I whispered. She didn't look at me and I walked closer._

_"Don't." she told me sternly. My face wrinkled in confusion as I stared at her. "I asked you one thing and one thing only." she started and finally looked at me, her eyes hard. "I asked you to protect her!"_

_"Ma, you-you don't understand." I stuttered._

_"I understand it as well as I saw it!" she yelled at me. "You let her down. You gave her to Fowler. How could you be so weak?!"_

_I felt hot tears pour down my face as I stared at her. This was not my Ma. She never acted this way and she never would. Something's not right. It has to be a dream…_

_"I tried, Ma. I tried." I whispered. She stepped up to me and held my chin in her hands._

_"Well, you failed." she seethed and vanished. I felt my body jerk again and slowly the white disappeared and I was back in the hospital room. I looked into the eyes of a doctor and screamed when I saw it was Sweet._

_"Welcome back, Jack!" he grinned and pulled out his gun. "Still can't protect her, huh?" he asked and cocked the gun. I let out a loud scream and he pulled the trigger._

I shot up from the bed and panted. I looked around quickly and sighed when I realized it was a dream. I grabbed the clock next to the bed and groaned.

3:26am

I looked over at her tiny body next to me and smiled. Her legs were tangled with mine in the bed sheets and her hair was laying all over the place. I brushed the stray strands off her face before getting out of bed.

_'It would kill her if I told her.'_ I thought to myself. I yawned and rubbed my face as I walked to the bathroom.

After relieving my aching bladder I laid back down with Emilie and pulled her to me.

"I can't promise I won't leave you, one day I will have to. But I can promise that when I go, it'll only be because of the man up above. And if anyone dare try and take me before that, I'll fight to the death." I whispered to her. I kissed her head before I went back to sleep.

* * *

_All I could do was scream. I almost couldn't move as I stared at Jack and the gunman. I yelled and ran over, shaking Jack and trying to move him, but he wouldn't budge. I stopped shaking him and looked around. Everything was still and silent. I turned around to look for Bobby and Angel but all of sudden hands gripped my arms and pulled me around._

_"Jack." I whimpered looking into his hard eyes. His hands were gripping my arms so hard, I knew there would be bruises._

_"It's all your fault." he hissed. I felt tears fill my eyes and stared at him. I tried to say something but stopped when I saw blood seep through his shirt and then pour out his mouth. _

_"You did this. I should have stayed in LA. I should have stayed away from you." she whispered and fell down to the ground. I kneeled next to him as Bobby and Angel ran over. They shoved me out the way as Jack took his last breath. I let out a sob and they turned to glare at me._

_"Stay away!" Bobby yelled. "You killed Jack and my Ma!" I shook my head as he yelled at me. I got to my feet and took off down the street. _

_They were right I killed them._

_"Where do you think you're going?" a voice cackled from behind me. I turned to see the icy glare of my aunt. _

_"You." I seethed and glared at her._

_"Ah yes, me." she smiled. "Now do you see why I took Richie away from you?" she grinned and my heart fell. "He would have died just like everyone else! You kill everyone you get near. My sister and brother-in-law, Abigail, Evelyn Mercer, and now your precious Jack."_

_"I did not! They were accidents. I had nothing to do with them dying. They were taken from me!" I cried and stormed over to her. I swung my hand at her but it flew through her face._

_"You're cursed. It's as simple as that Emilie." she smiled. "When you start to love someone, their death clock starts ticking faster and faster. It will never change."_

_"Stop it!" I begged. _

_"You're worthless." she yelled._

_"Stop it! Shut up!" I screamed and covered my ears but they were ripped from my head. I looked behind me to see Jack holding my hands._

_"Unlovable." he whispered. _

_"No, please!" I sobbed and fell to the ground. He kneeled in front of me and smirked._

_"You're a murderer." he whispered._

_"Jackie, no. I love you!" I cried and reached out for him. I saw his face soften and he rubbed my cheek._

_"I know, Emilie. That's how I got here in the first place." he told me softly. "Crash and burn, Emilie. Crash and burn."_

My eyes popped open I stared at the ceiling. I felt my lip and I couldn't stop the hot tears that poured down my face. I brought the blanket up to cover my face and try to muffle my soft cries. I pressed it to my face and pulled it down while exhaling. I looked over at Jack and sniffed.

_'It would kill him if I told him.'_ I thought. I kissed his forehead as I sat up in bed to look over him. I sighed when I read the red LED lights.

7:57am.

I moved the covers from my legs and slowly got out of bed. I was putting my robe on when an arm snaked around my waist and drug me back into bed. I giggled and let him pull me across the bed and into his chest. I turned over so I was facing him and his lips were instantly on mine. The dream faded away as we kissed and I knew it would never be more than just that. A dream, no a nightmare. Jack loved me. I could tell by his kiss, by his touch and by the look in his eyes.

"Good morning." he whispered. I smiled and ran a finger across his face.

"Morning. You hungry?" I asked. His eyes opened and a grin spread across his face. "Jack." I warned, knowing his mind was going somewhere that we couldn't go. He pouted and sat up next to me.

"When am I not hungry?" he asked. I laughed and scooted out from his grip and finally stood up.

"Well, get dressed and I'll start breakfast." I told him and walked out. I made my way into the kitchen and looked around.

"What do I wanna make?" I thought out loud. I bit my lip and opened fridge. I pulled out the eggs, cut up ham, cheese and milk. I grabbed a bowl from the cabinet and started making omelet's. I pulled a pan out and set it on the stove. I mixed the all the eggs and ham together and added a bit of milk before pouring it in the pan. I smiled when I felt two arms come across my middle and looked over my shoulder.

"Ohh, yes." he moaned and snatched a piece a ham. I slapped his wrist and watched him limp over to the table. "So uh, you know Christmas is in like three days?" he asked.

"Yes, I do and I do wish you wouldn't remind me, I have yet to go shopping." I sighed and folded the omelet. I heard his deep laugh and my lips curved up. I'd never tire of hearing that.

"Well, we still got four days. We can go to the mall, if you want?" he offered. I laid his omelet on the plate and took it over to him. He had his hurt leg resting on another chair and was leaned back in his own chair.

"Your leg." I pointed out. He smirked and leaned forward.

"If walking on my leg and maybe getting it sore gets me out of the house, I'll live." he smirked.

"Weren't you the one saying you didn't wanna leave the house?" I asked, laughing. He cut into his omelet and took a bit before answering.

"Yes, but I lied. I'm tired of sitting in anyone's house 24/7. So take me to the mall, woman!" he demanded and slammed his fist on the table. I laughed and leaned over to kiss him.

"Maybe." I teased. He pouted and cut off a piece of omelet and held it out to me. I leaned closer to get it but he pulled it away.

"Jackie." I whined. He smirked and raised his brow.

"Emilie." he said, trying not to laugh. I stared at him and rolled my eyes.

"Fine. I'll take you to the damn mall." I gave in. He held the fork back out and I stared at him as I leaned in to take it. He didn't move away and I snatched the piece off the fork with my mouth. I smiled and he started eating again. "So what do you want for Christmas?" I asked. He had the fork half way to his mouth when he stopped and looked over at me for a few seconds and started eating again.

"Nothing." he mumbled through the food in his mouth.

"Nothing?" I asked. "You have to want something." I told him. He shook his head and focused on his plate. I stared at him oddly but let the subject fall as he limped over to the sink and washed his plate. I watched as he silently made his way back to my room and closed the door.

I wondered if I did something wrong, or said something bad. Maybe he was upset that this was the first Christmas without Evelyn. I wasn't sure but whatever it was he didn't want to talk about it so I wasn't going to push, yet.

* * *

We were dressed and ready to go to the mall when Emilie's house phone rang. I groaned and leaned against the door as she ran over to answer it.

"Hello?" she answered quickly. I watched her nod her head and look at me before speaking again. "Yes, we'll be there. Thank you." she smiled and hung up.

"Where are we going?" I asked as she walked over to me.

"To your doctor. He's going out of town for a month and wants to see you before he goes. So you might get that air cast today." she smiled. I ran my fingers through my hair and sighed.

"Yes!" I softly yelled and smiled down at her. "Let's go." I hurried.

We drove over to the doctor's office and only waited a few minutes before the nurse called us back to the room. I sat up on the table and laid back waiting for the doctor.

"I can't wait until this is all over with. It's only a constant reminder of what happened and all I want to do is forget about it." I sighed covering my face. I felt Emilie's hand cover on of mine and let it fall to the side.

"I'm going to have a scar." I told her. Her eyes shot over to my shoulder and bit her lip.

"It's not healed all the way yet. It might fade." she whispered. I understood her trying to be positive and I kissed her knuckles. She smiled and we both looked over as the door opened.

"Hello, Jack." Dr. Burns greeted. "Emilie. How are you two today?" he asked. I sat up and looked at him as he pulled up the roller chair.

"It would get a lot better if you took this thing off me." I told him, honestly, pointing down to the black cast that stopped just under my knee.

"Well, we are going to see about that." he smiled and took out his notebook. I saw Emilie fidget and looked over at her.

"What?" I asked, smirking at her discomfort. She looked at me with a strained face and I laughed. "go use the bathroom." she stopped and glared at me.

"I don't have to pee." she declared and the doctor laughed.

"I know that face. I'll be fine, just go pee." I told her. She smirked and gave me a kiss before leaving. I shook my head as she shut the door behind her.

"She's a trip, eh?" Dr. Burns smiled. I laughed and nodded.

"You have no idea."

* * *

I couldn't believe Jack knew me as well as he did. I mean, he knew my bathroom face, for god's sake. I liked that though. He knew all my faces, all my sounds, all my moods and all my smiles. He knew me almost better than I knew myself.

I didn't bother going back into the room after I used the bathroom. I walked out into the waiting room and picked up a magazine. Unfortunately, the only one's there were bridal magazines and baby magazines. I grabbed the bridal magazine and flipped through the pages, looking at the dresses, rings and different people's experiences. I never realized how much there needed to be done for a wedding.

"That's a good way to scare a man off." Jack said. I looked up and saw him smirking at me and nodded to the magazine in my hand. I sent him a playful glare and set it down.

"It was that or baby magazines." I told him. He laughed and rubbed his chin.

"Yeah, the baby one would have made me run faster." he told me.

"What you got something against marriage and kids?" I asked, teasing. He looked at me and shook his head.

"We're so not talking about this right now." he laughed. I laughed with him and looked down at his leg. The cast was gone.

"It's gone!" I squealed and hugged him.

"Yes, but he has to wear this air cast during the day. He can take it off at night and for shower's. He still should use at least one crutch or try to put as little pressure on it unless he feel's it's okay. If it gets sore, don't stand on it. I gave you another refill on your pain meds, I know Christmas is coming up and we don't want a grumpy Jack that's in pain, right Em?" Dr. Burns joked.

"No, we don't. Plus, he's been staying at my place and I have lots of stairs." I told him. He nodded and handed me his prescription and I shook his hand.

"Thanks, Doc." Jack smiled and shook his hand.

"No problem. If anything happens you both have my home number, just call. If all feels better in three weeks, you can take the cast off. I'd like to see you walk in here in four weeks, alright?" he smiled. We nodded and thanked him again before leaving.

* * *

The mall was packed.

No, that was an understatement.

The mall was crammed full and it was almost 5pm. I knew we wouldn't have but a few hours to shop so that meant we would have to come back tomorrow. That would be our last day, seeing as Christmas Eve was the day after that. But at least, we had the last minute sales.

"We should make a list of who to shop for." I suggested as we walked into the mall. We stopped on the side of the hallway and looked at each other.

"Let's get the girls first, incase we don't get to finish." Jack told me. I smirked and crossed my arms.

"I thought you didn't like kids?" I asked, remembering his comment at the doctor's office. He held up a finger and shook it.

"I didn't say that." he told me. "I said it was a way to scare me off and I also said I didn't want to talk about it." I couldn't help but feel a tad hurt but I brushed it off. Kids were far from the present so there wasn't any need to argue about it.

"Alright. Well, I agree. We should get the girls first then shop for everyone else." I agreed and pulled out my list. Jack looked over and beamed.

"Danni, wants a guitar?" he asked. I laughed and nodded my head.

"Yeah, a few days after you woke up Jerry took me to the house to get some clothes and Danni went to your room. I heard noise and walked in and she was plucking the strings on your guitar. She asked me if she got a guitar one day if you would teach her." I smiled as we walked down the hallway. Jack's grin spread across his face and he looked over at me.

"I'll get her a guitar and I'll teach her." he smiled. "What else doe she want and what does Amelia want?" I opened my list back up and looked down.

"Amelia asked me a while back why you guys called me Diddle." I told him and saw his face fall. "I didn't tell her about my parents but I told her it was a from an old nursery rhyme. Well, she asked me to sing it to her-"

"You sang to her before singing to me?" Jack asked, half serious, half hurt.

"I didn't sing it. I told her what it was and she liked it. Anyways, Paisley was passing by the old book store off of Main St., and spotted this huge book of lullaby's, nursery rhymes and poems. I want to get that for her." I smiled. He nodded and looked at the list.

"But other than that, they just want girly, kid stuff?" he asked. I laughed and nodded.

"Yes. Girly, kid stuff."

We spent the next four hours walking around the mall and getting aggravated each time someone nearly ran us over. It wasn't as bad as we thought though. There was a lot of people there but they were all spaced out and starting to leave by the time we got there. Jack's eyes nearly bugled out of his head when we walked into the toy store.

"There's so much pink and blue." he whispered. I laughed and pulled him down the girl's aisle.

"It's a toy store, it's supposed to be." I smirked and continued to shop.

By the end of the day we had the girl's shopped for. I let Jack get Daniella a guitar. We didn't want to get her a real guitar but we got her a starter guitar. We also managed to find her a tiny work station for school. It had pencils, crayons, markers and tiny note pads with different Disney characters on them. I figured it would give her the motivation to do school work. I was going to stop by the book store on the way home to get Amelia's present. But at the mall we found her a pretty Porcelain Doll and got her a new pair of shoes.

"I've never been in a book store before." Jack stated as I held the door open for him. I rolled my eyes and walked in after him.

"Can you even read?" I teased. He shot me a glare and looked around.

"What are we looking for again?" he asked.

"A big book of nursery rhymes. Look over in the children's section and I'll go find an employee." I told him and walked off.

* * *

I watched her walk off and slowly made my way over to the children's section. Why was today full of kids talk? I knew I had been an ass every time she joked with me but it was a touchy subject with me. I loved Daniella and Amelia but it wasn't kids in general that bugged me. It was the thought of my kids, that bugged me. It was a long, sore subject that I knew I'd have to explain to Emilie one day, especially after seeing the hurt on her face after I blew it off twice.

I walked down a tiny aisle and looked around. As I scanned the books I heard a tiny grunt. I walked around the corner and saw a tiny girl reaching for a book that was out of her reach. She was on her toes and had a determined look on her face. I smirked and walked over to her. She looked up at me sadly and I grabbed the book she was reaching for. She smiled up at me and took the book from me.

"Thank you, sir." she whispered. I nodded and watched her run off. I felt someone behind me and turned to see Emilie. By the look on her face I knew she was what I had done and I knew she wanted to say something but she didn't.

"I found it." she smiled softly and held up and old book. I nodded and walked with her to the checkout.

We didn't say much on our way home but the urge to say something was killing both of us. We never had the family discussion or talked about anything that we wanted in our future. Too much had happened since I got back for us to even go on a real date much less talk about marriage and kids. But I decided that night was time we touched the subject.

"I'm sorry about being such an ass today." I apologized as I took another bite of meatloaf. Emilie looked up at me, surprised that I was talking about it.

"It's alright. Some people just don't like kids." she told me softly. I leaned across the table and grabbed her hand.

"It's not that I don't like kids, Em. I do, I love kids." I told her.

"Then why brush me off like that?" she asked. I could see the confusion and hurt in her eyes. I did more than just brush it off, I hit a spot with her. A bad spot.

"I just," I sighed and rubbed my face. "I don't know if I want to have kids of my own." I told her honestly. She stared at me and set her fork down.

"Why?" she asked.

"I don't know." I shrugged.

"I want kids." she told me quickly. "I want to get married and have kids with my husband. Family means a lot to me, Jack. And I know it means a lot to you too but that's what I want. I want to give my children what my parents never got to give me." she confessed. I nodded and looked down at the table.

"I don't know I if can give you that, Emilie." I whispered. I didn't have to look at her to know she was crying. I heard the shaky breath she took in and exhaled.

"I didn't ask you to give me that." she replied cooly. Her response shocked me and I finally looked up at her. She must have seen the shock in my eyes and her face fell. "Sorry."

"It's alright." I whispered. "Listen, Em, I love you. I love you with all my heart and I can't see myself with anyone else in the world. But there's a lot I have to come to terms with before I think about marriage and especially kids. But I don't want this to ruin us, I don't want this to hurt us." I told her softly. She looked up at me and smiled.

"It's not." she promised and walked over to sit on my lap. "I don't want to talk about it either. I don't want that right now. Right now, I want us to make up for the past year or so. I want us to become an us and have fun. We can think about the future when it comes, okay?" she smiled. I leaned up to kiss her but she pulled back. I gave her a confused look before she smiled and touched my nose with hers.

"And I love you, too." she said before kissing me.


	23. Frosty & The Popsicle

**Thanks for all the reviews! I appreciate it!! :)**

**Big FYI- Emilie is NOT preggers...lol. Last chapter was mainly a filler and filled with good info. The first part of the story was mainly Jack taking care of Em and helping her with her demons, now she gets to help him with his. Thsi next bit, after the address, is a LOT about Jack and his past and his troubles. Just and FYI, but unfortunatly no little Jack's or Diddle's will be wadlding around anytime soon...lol.**

**SexySadie88**

**BEG75**

**MissIndependent101**

**Berries-R-Blue**

**Strauigt Edge Queen**

**Thank you bunches! I love reading yall's reviews! Now enjoy...lol :)**

* * *

I have a love hate relationship with Detroit. I loved seeing snow glittering the ground but I hated when it snowed me in my house. I loved when the sun shown through the clouds on a summer day but I hated when we could only use the sprinklers every other day because of a drought. But this is what I got from Detroit. I never got the in between, only the very little or a lot.

"He needs his hat."

I wasn't sure how long I was starting at the snow man but apparently it was a while. Some kids from Paisley's floor came out to make it earlier and didn't kick it down before they left. I turned to look at Jack as he limped over to me.

"What?" I asked confused. He chuckled and wrapped his arms around me.

"He needs his hat." he repeated, pointing at the snow man. "Like Frosty? You've been staring at him like you're waiting for him to speak. But he needs his hat." he smirked. I look up at him and frowned.

"Don't pick on me." I told him. He kept smirking as he leaned down to kiss me. "Ready?" I asked.

"Yeah, let's get this shit over with." he groaned.

He wasn't in a really good mood this morning. He didn't like the mall yesterday and he knew today would be worse. I think he was stumped on what to get his brothers.

"We won't be here long. I promise." I assured him as we walked into the mall. He rolled his eyes and grabbed my hand.

"On a normal day we wouldn't be here long. It's the day before Christmas Eve and we have to shop for Bobby and Angel." he whined and whipped his head in my direction. "And what in the hell am I supposed to get them? Bobby's like the Scrooge and Angel's borderline Grinch."

"He is not." I defended. "Angel loves Christmas. Bobby, well Bobby doesn't like the time and money that comes with buying gifts." I smiled.

"Do we really have to buy something for Sofi?" he asked.

"Yes, nothing but big. Just something that let's her know we see her as family too." I laughed.

"Why? If we make her feel like family, she'll stay and Bobby would kill you." he told me, trying not to laugh. I stopped and turned to look at him.

"Listen, Sofi, as annoying and loud as she might be, is apart of this family whether you, Bobby, Jerry, Camille and everyone else likes it or not. Alright?" I smirked, poking his chest as I spoke. He grinned down at me.

"Ya know, I remember you promising one hell of a night when I got my cast taken off." he whispered, softly nipping the side of my neck. I blushed a little, seeing as we were in the mall, and pushed him back.

"I have no recollection of that promise, Mr. Mercer." I teased and started to walk off. I felt his hands grab my wrists and pull me back into him. His breath on the back of my neck sent shivers down my spine and I let out a soft moan when he rubbed himself against me.

"Jackie, later, I promise. But right now, we're showing an awful lot of PDA and we need to be shopping." I smiled up at him.

"I'm holding you to that promise." he told me firmly and started walking again.

We visited just about every store there was in the mall and looked over inch of each one until we were sure we had everything we needed. It took us nearly four hours but we finished getting presents for everyone.

* * *

We both let out simultaneous sighs as we sat down on the couch. Bags were spread all over my living room floor and my feet were killing me.

"And I'm still not done." I whined and buried my face in Jack's neck. He kissed my forehead and laid his feet on the coffee table, grabbing the remote.

"We're already late for everything, why decorate when it's going to be taken down in two days?" he asked. I looked up at him and glared.

"Because I want a real Christmas this year." I pouted.

"You had one last year." he said looking at the television. I grabbed his chin and made him look at me.

"I didn't have you." I told him softly. He laid the remote down and pulled me onto his lap, snaking his hands up my shirt.

"Then decorate." he smiled. "We'll make up for last year. Even if it is late." he promised and kissed my hand.

"Can we keep them up until New Years?" I asked, smiling a little. He pulled me down for a quick kiss and smiled again.

"We can keep them up all year if you like." he laughed. I leaned down to kiss him again and smiled against his lips when his fingers crawled higher and higher up my back. "Is this later enough?" he whispered, brushing his lips across my ear. I giggled and scooted off his lap to pull him up but stopped when his cell rang.

"You've got to be kidding me." he growled and opened it. "Yeah?" I walked into the kitchen as he talked to whoever it was and fixed myself a sandwich. I sat at the table and waited for him to come in and I smirked when he did. He slowly limped in, scratching his head. I knew he wanted to ask me something, I could see it written all over his face.

"Who was that?" I asked casually. He sat down and shrugged.

"Eh, just Troy and James." he replied. I nodded and pulled a piece of bread off my sandwich.

"Everything okay? They're not ditching us for dinner are they? " I asked, popping it into my mouth. We decided that we would all gather tonight for a Christmas dinner being that we were all going to be with family on the actual Eve and holiday. He looked over at me and shook his head.

"No. Everything's good. They are still coming." I stared at him for a few seconds and he sighed and laid his hands on the table. "They just wanted me to come over for a little jam session before they came over."

"Okay." I nodded.

"But I told them no. I know you want to decorate and I don't want you doing it by yourself. Plus, we still gotta get dinner ready." he told me. I smirked and looked over at him.

"You can go, Jack. I know you've been itching to get with them again. I'll get Pais to help me with decorations and dinner. Just make sure you three are here on time." I told him. A huge grin spread across his face and he leaned over the table to kiss me.

"We'll be back before dinner, I swear." he vowed as he limped to the front door. "I love you, babe!" he called out.

"Love you too!" I yelled as he shut the door. I laughed and shook my head as I picked up the phone to call Paisley down to help. A few minutes later, I heard my door open and shut and Paisley was smiling at me.

"I haven't decorated in years!" she exclaimed and pulled me out my chair. "My mom always has it done whenever we get over there and I live alone, so why decorate my place? But we are going to make this place all pretty and cheery." she smiled. I bit back my laughter as I watched her skip into the living room. I had never seen her this happy before.

"So where do you wanna start?" I asked and looked around at all the decorations. She tapped her chin and pointed to the tiny Christmas tree. I nodded and started opening it.

We cleared the furniture out of the way and set it up in the corner. It was a tad bit too tall and we had to cut about 5 inches off the top so we could fit and a topping when it was time. We wrapped it in lights first. Jack only picked up white and blue, said it looked cooler. I got the lucky spot of standing between the tree and the wall as we passed the lights around. When we managed to wrap it from top to bottom, we grabbed all the ornaments.

"What are these?" Paisley asked, opening a box of ornaments. I smiled and walked over to her.

"Some are from Evelyn's and some are mine and Abigail's. I thought it's be nice to have new and old decorations so I snatched a few from Jerry." I told her and picked up an orange snow flake made form paper. I turned it so she could see a tiny picture of a young Jack in the middle.

"Oh my gosh." she exclaimed and grabbed it. "He's too cute!" I laughed and took it back.

"Evelyn made sure they had a normal childhood, as normal as it could be. She wanted to give them traditions so they could pas sit on." I told her as I hung it on the front of the tree. "Jerry and Camille sit down with the girls each year and make decorations.'

"Will you do that with your kids?" she asked, walking up next to me and hanging up a few more. I remembered mine and Jack's conversation last night and sighed.

"I'd like to." I whispered and walked back to grab a few more. We hung the snow flakes, shiny balls, crystal figures and other ornaments all over the tree. Making sure people could see both new and old ones. Pais grabbed the tinsel and sprinkled pieces all over the tree, giving it the sparkle that we both wanted and needed to see. We had another couple strings of lights and hung them around the fireplace and set out a few Christmas trinkets. When we were all done we stood by the door and smiled at our work. In a matter of hours my living room went from a normal day to a tiny winter wonderland.

"We forgot the tree topping." Paisley announced and started walking back over but I grabbed her hand.

"I wanna let Jack do that." I smiled. She laughed and nodded.

"Well, we gotta start on dinner." she sighed and we walked into the kitchen. "What do ya need?" she asked as I started grabbing all the food I needed for tonight. I named off the pots and pans I needed for dinner and she graciously set them out for me while I started everything.

"So how has Jack been?" she asked, leaning next to me as I started the corn on the cob.

"He's been good." I told her, placing the corn in the water. She looked at me and tilted her head.

"And you?" she asked. I walked past her to the oven and looked in at the ham.

"Good." I lied. I wasn't good. I had two more nightmares since that night and they were worse.

"Liar." she declared and stopped me when I tried to walk past her back to the stove. "I can see it in those pretty blue eyes of yours. What's going on?" she pried. I sighed and tried to move past her.

"Pais, I need to get dinner done." I whined as she pushed me back into a chair.

"Dinner is fine. You're not. Talk." she demanded and sat in front of me. I slouched in the chair and looked at her.

"I've been having nightmares." I caved.

"About?" she asked.

"The shooting. They all are the same but each time it get's worse. The first started with me watching him get shot, not being able to help him. He blamed it one me, told me I was cursed. Then my aunt came in." I huffed.

"Mean aunt? The one that gave you up and took Richie?" she asked.

"Yeah, that witch. She yelled at me saying that when I loved someone it was there death sentence."

"Oh Em, have you told Jack?" she asked. I laughed out loud and shook my head.

"No. Could you imagine that conversation? Me telling him I'm having nightmares about him almost dying and him blaming it on me. That's a nice Christmas topic." I said sarcastically. Paisley grabbed my hands and looked at me in the eyes.

"Tell him." she told me sternly. I sighed and nodded my head.

* * *

I took the bus down to the studio where James and Troy were at. I couldn't drive and I wasn't going to ask Emilie with all the work she had to do. And I wasn't too good for the bus, it's just a bus.

"Jack-O!" Troy greeted as I pushed through the doors. I smiled and gave him a half hug. James walked up and patted my back.

"Did ya have a hard time gettin' out?" James asked.

"Actually, no. She told me to come." I laughed.

"I knew I liked her for a reason." Troy laughed along, going to sit behind his drum set. "So how ya been Jackie boy?"

"Eh, I've been better." I told them, sitting on an amp and grabbing my guitar.

"What's going on?" James asked. I smirked at him and adjusted my strings.

"You like channeling Oprah, huh?" I teased, earning a chuckle from both men as they looked at me expectantly. "I've been having nightmares. Not about like me dying or whatever. Nothing like post traumatic stress but just nightmares."

"You gotta give us more than that Jack." Troy told me softly.

"When Fowler took Em he kind of tried something." I told them slowly. They didn't know about the whole drama that went down about Bobby and Angel thinking Emilie was…touched.

"Did he try to fucking rape her?" James yelled. I shook my head and motioned for him to sit down.

"No, he didn't really touch her. But he wanted to and almost tried, if that makes any sense." I sighed. "Anyways, I keep having dreams that I'm in the hospital room and he's got Emilie there in his arms." I let out a shaky breath. "He touches her right in front of me. Puts his hand down her pants and all. Then they both tell me I failed at protecting her."

"Damn, Jack." Troy whispered and rubbed his face. "Does Em know?" he asked.

"Hell no. do you know who guilty she would feel if I told her that?" I asked. "I can't tell her." They both looked at me and sighed.

"You gotta tell her, man." James told me softly. I sighed and finished fiddling with my strings.

"I'll think about it. But if I do, it won't be now. She wants this Christmas to be perfect, to make up for last year. That's the least I can give her." I told them.

"What did you get her?" Troy asked. I cursed out loud and smacked my forehead. "You didn't get her anything did you?"

"No, I did." I told them and looked at my watch, 5:26pm. "I just forgot to pick it up. Think we can make it to Lowry's before 6 o'clock?" I asked them. They smirked and nodded. We piled into James's car and made our way over to the jewelry store I got her Diddle necklace from. I made a trip to the store a few days after I was released and they said they'd hold it but they were going on break from three weeks starting Christmas Eve. I needed to get there before they closed or I'd be in the dog house.

"Wait, wait!" I yelled as James helped me out the car. We just pulled up as the owner was walking out. He looked over at us and smirked.

"Mr. Mercer, I was wondering when you were coming back." he said, opening the door back. "I have it right here." He handed me the box and patted me on the back.

"Merry Christmas, Jack." he smiled and I walked back over to the car. The guys looked at me and I handed the box to them. Their eyes popped when they saw it.

"Wow, Jack-O. You pulled out all the big guns, huh?" Troy smirked looking in the velvet box. I smirked and took it from them.

"Just drive. I don't wanna get murdered for missing dinner." I told them as I shoved the box in my pocket. I made sure they knew not to say anything about a present of any kind while they were here. I wanted her to be surprised.

I could not believe it. In the five hours we were gone she decorated and cooked. I walked in and couldn't help but smile. She had the tree set up, lights around it setting the mood and dinner was smelling the whole house up. She had to have wanted to see my reaction because as soon as the door was closed she came scurrying out of the kitchen, smiling at me. Her eyes sparkled as she flipped the switch to turn the lights on and I laughed.

"It looks good, babe." I whispered and nuzzled her neck. She kissed my lips real quick before pulling me over to the tree. I finally got a good look and smiled. She took some of Ma's old ornaments and put them with the new ones we bought. I smiled down and pulled her to my side.

"I left the top for you." she smiled and handed me the angel that topped the tree. I chuckled and reached up to finish off the tree.

"Thanks, Diddle." I whispered and kissed her head. She buried her face in my jacket and scarf as I held her and looked at the tree. I almost forgot it was my first without Ma. Sure I had missed last year but she was alive then. This year she was gone completely. I wanted to be sad about that but I also wanted to be happy that it was my first with Emilie. I was torn. But I knew Ma would want me to be happy and I was,

"Okay, save all that smoochy smooch for later, I'm starving." Troy called from the kitchen. I glared at him and he smirked as he walked back in. Emilie grabbed my hand and pulled me to the kitchen.

"We slaved in this hot kitchen for hours, so you better enjoy it." she demanded, playfully wagging a finger at me. I grabbed it and gently bit it, making her blush a little.

"Let's eat." she whispered.

* * *

After a fulfilling dinner and a few carols later, it was just Jack and Emilie. The boys agreed to clean up seeing as the girls cooked and of course, they had no objections. It was nothing fancy but it was a nice dinner. A Christmas with friends. And now it was just them, sitting on the outside balcony, huddled in Jack's jacket and a blanket.

"Warm?" Jack asked, pulling Emilie closer to his body. She smiled up at him and kissed the underside of his chin.

"Yes, thank you." she whispered. She laid her head back and sighed. It was heaven being in his arms again. Even though it was below freezing outside, there was no other place she'd rather be than right there with Jack. That feeling was mutual as Jack looked down at her. He could see the lights from other's peoples houses shining in her eyes. She was beautiful.

"I love you." he whispered. She looked up at him and smiled softly before reaching her hand up and touching his face.

"I love you too." she told him. She knew it was true. She saw it in his eyes, heard it in his voice and felt it in his touch. He loved her and she loved him. Feeling this right now made her guilty for not telling him about her dreams. They should be able to tell each other anything.

"I have something to confess." she stated and moved a little, so she was facing him better. Jack's heart almost stopped and she noticed it. "Nothing like that." she added quickly.

"What is it babe?" he asked, feeling better that she wasn't going to say she cheated on him.

"I've been having nightmares." she told him softly. Jack looked at her and rubbed her cheek.

"What about, Em?" he asked but he knew the answer. He saw it in her eyes. "The shooting?"

"Yes and no." she sighed. "I've just been seeing it happen again but in slow motion kind of. I go and try to pull you away but you won't move. I see him shoot you and you start to blame it on me." she explained and he moved to hush her.

"Emilie-"

"No, let me finish." she pleaded and he nodded. "Bobby and Angel come out telling me it's my fault and you tell me I'm cursed. My aunt shows up and tells me I kill everyone I love. It's horrible, Jack." By this time Emilie was crying so hard she could barley breath. She didn't realize how much the dreams were hurting her. Jack wiped her tears away with his thumb and kissed her head. Now he felt selfish for not wanting to tell her about his dreams. But then again, he didn't know she was having them too. He closed his eyes before talking.

"The last few nights I've had this re-occurring dream." he started. Emilie calmed her crying and looked up at him. "I've been strapped to the hospital bed and Fowler is there. With you. He tells me that I wasn't strong enough to protect you and that I didn't deserve you." Jack sighed and looked away from Emilie. "He touched you, Em. In the dream he touches you right in front of me and he pushes you over the-" he stopped, holding back tears and trying to push the image out of his head.

"It's okay." Emilie tried to soothe him and not get upset again.

"The only thing you said was that I promised you. I promised you even after death and I failed." Jack choked out. "And I don't even want to start on how my Ma acted." he finished and finally looked up at her.

"I was afraid you'd hate me for dreaming that." Emilie confessed.

"I'd never hate you." Jack told her. "I'd never blame you for what happened."

"And I'd never blame you." she promised. Jack kissed her hands and pulled her back to his chest. She snuggled into his warmth again and sighed.

"You're not cursed." Jack whispered after a few minutes. "You're love isn't a death sentence either."

"It seems like it sometimes." Emilie whispered back.

"It's not." Jack assured her. "It's a blessing. It's a life fulfilled having you love someone. There's so many things people want to do before they die. I like to think having someone love you unconditionally is one of them." Jack told her. "Thanks to you, your parents, Abigail and Evelyn all got that chance. They died knowing there was someone that loved them. They died knowing that you loved them."

"Honestly, it's the only way I'd like to die. Knowing that you loved me." he whispered. Emilie couldn't help the tears fall as she heard him. Jack rubbed her arms and looked at her as she cried in his chest. He held her as the reality hit. The reality of how much they really cared for one another and how far they had come. He held her as she slowly started to realize that she was able to love someone and not loose them. She was slowly but surely coming to terms with that.

She almost fell asleep until something hit her nose. She opened her eyes and saw Jack smiling at her. She was about to ask him what he did but something else hit her cheek. She looked around and noticed it was snowing again.

"You were about to blame me weren't you?" he asked. She nodded and smiled. "You're so mean." he teased. Emilie laughed and scooted off his lap. She held her hands out for him and he let her pull him up. She went to walked inside but he pulled her into a hug.

"I love you, Em." he sighed, holding her close and looking out at the silent and snow covered streets of Detroit. "I love you more than I ever thought imaginable."

"I love you too, Jackie." she smiled and leaned up to kiss him. "But let's go inside before we turn into popsicles." she laughed and pulled him to the door. Jack's mind went to over load when she said that.

"But if I were a popsicle, it'd give you more incentive to suc-" Jack stopped when Emilie's hand covered his mouth. He looked down at her and smirked when he saw her mouth hanging open and blushing like mad.

"Jack Mercer!" she exclaimed and removed her hand. "Don't you dare finish that sentence."


	24. Stories

**A/N: Okay the next chapter is almost done. As a few of you know I have a lot of future stories planned and I do tend to get burned out after writing for the same character for too long (I did this with my NY story). And well, it seems I have gotten burned out with Jack :( So I got half of the next chapter before I decided to take a break and clear my mind by starting one of my future stories, which happens to be a Death Sentence one, focusing on Billy not Joe. I have half of that chapter done and once I finish it I will finish the next chapter of this story. I won't let this get behind don't worry but I needed a break.**

**MissIndependent101-Haha...Yeah, no Jack's, for now, but that's still a maybe...lol! We'll see how well Emilie can help him and what his real reasons are for not wanting kids. :) I was damn proud of myself for that popsicle joke...lol! Thanks! :)**

**BEG75- Yes, you were the only one! But that's okay. Some of my funny rubbed off from Joli to Jack in this one...lol. Again, I was so proud of myself for that last part.**

**Berries-R-Blue- He's a Mercer! Need I say more? :)**

**SexySadie88- Yes, they are slowly working out a real relationship. :)**

**StraightEdgeQueen- Thanks! :)**

* * *

It was Christmas Eve morning. The sun was glistening over trees and melting the tiny top layer of snow that fell last night. The streets were still and almost silent. This one of the only days Detroit seemed like a calm city and not a war zone. It was the only two days of the year kids would let their kids play outside and not worry about them getting killed or kidnapped. It was two days that should have meant the world to Jack and Emilie but there was something that was missing.

Evelyn.

"Jackie?" Emilie whispered, walking out behind him on the balcony. She had felt him toss and turn all this morning before finally getting up and walking outside. He knew they were all going to meet this morning and go see Evelyn and he wasn't sure if he was ready. He had been leaning over the rail for half an hour and it wasn't the cold that was freezing him from the outside in.

"How did you do it?" he asked her suddenly. She laid her chin on his shoulder and watched him blow the smoke from between his lips. She knew what he was feeling. She had gone through it almost two years ago and she wanted to tell him it was easy but it wasn't.

"How did you find the motivation to get up in the morning and walk around knowing she wasn't there anymore? How did you sleep or eat?" he asked, throwing the cigarette over the rail. "How did you do it? How did you deal with it?" Emilie wrapped her arms tightly around his chest and kissed his neck.

"I had you." she whispered. Jack's body stopped trembling and he almost forgot to breath. He took her hands in his before turning around and pulling her to him. "I had you to keep me going everyday, to keep me breathing and alive. If I didn't have you, Jack, I wouldn't have survived."

Jack held her tight and buried his nose in her hair. He never really knew how much he had done for her after Abigail died. He didn't realize that the only reason she woke up in the mornings were so that she could see what he had planned for that day. Whether it was showing her Detroit, taking her to the park or to play pool. She was curious as to what he wanted them to do that way. It was Jack the kept her from going in too deep, it was him that held her the nights she cried and it was him that gave her the motivation to continue living.

Now she got to return the favor.

"We better get going. We got a long day ahead of us." Jack mumbled into her hair. She nodded and slowly pulled back, grabbing his hands.

"It'll be okay." she promised and kissed his hands. He smiled down at her and nodded.

"I know." he whispered. They walked back inside the apartment and Emilie turned to him.

"I already have the girl's presents and Jerry and Camille's presents in the car." she told him. They were letting the girls and them open presents today so they could spend Christmas Day with Camille's family.

"You don't think Bobby and Angel will still be mad at us, do you?" Emilie asked as they drove to the cemetery.

"Em, I think they are worried that we're mad at them." he laughed. She sighed and felt the nerves build up in her as they reached the cemetery. She couldn't help but glance at Jack and felt her heart break seeing his face drop and his body go rigid. He hadn't been here since the funeral and they both know it would be hard on him.

Emilie's main heartache was looking over at him and then at the cemetery and realizing how close she came to loosing him. If he hadn't made it to the hospital in time, he would have died. Then not only would she be going to see Evelyn here, but Jack as well. That thought scared her and ate her up on the inside.

* * *

I didn't want to be here but I knew I had to come. I couldn't just hide forever, I'd be a hypocrite. I said those exact words to Emilie before Abigail's funeral. I told her she couldn't hide and that goes for me too. And the last thing I wanted to do was ignore the fact that my Ma was gone on Christmas Eve. It's bad enough she isn't here in person but that doesn't mean I can't go see her in the only way I can.

That's just plain selfish.

So that now left me and Emilie walking hand in hand over to my brother's who were gathered near the grave. I squeezed Em's hand as we got closer and saw Bobby and Angel look over at us.

"Jack, Emilie." Bobby nodded, softly. I nodded and I saw Emilie give him a small smile. Angle shoved his hand's in his pocket's and stared at the ground. "Listen, we want to apologize for our actions since you got home."

"We were only trying to look out for you." Angel added, looking at me. He slowly turned to Emilie and sighed. "And the thought of him touching you, Diddle. I blamed myself for that. If we hadn't have started this war it wouldn't have happened."

"Oh Angel." Emilie cried and stepped to hug him. He pulled her into him and kissed the top of her head.

"It's not anyone's fault." I whispered, looking at my two brothers. "We all knew there would be consequences and even though some unexpected things happened, we're all okay." Bobby nodded and reached over to hug me.

"But we're sorry. We didn't mean to go overboard there." Bobby finished. I nodded and shook Angel's hand when he let Emilie go to hug Bobby.

"You are forgiven." She smiled. "Just don't do it again." she warned. I wrapped my arm around her neck and pulled her to my side as we walked over to meet Jerry and his family.

"Uncle Jack!" Amelia screamed and ran over to me but Emilie caught her before she ran and grabbed a hold of my leg. The little girl squealed and Emilie set her on her hip as Daniella walked over.

"You dummy, Uncle Jack's hurt. You can't jump on him." she said, glaring at Amelia.

"Don't call me a dummy, D!" Amelia cried out.

"Girls, girls. Not here." Jerry scolded them and walked over to hug me. "Jackie, how's the leg? I see you got your cast off."

"Yeah, got it off yesterday. Feels so much better." I smiled. Camille walked over to grab Amelia from Emilie and she smiled.

"I'm glad your doing better, Jack. You had me worried for a minute." she smiled and reached up to kiss my cheek.

"Yeah, what a meanie." Amelia teased, poking her tongue out at me. I pinched her cheek and smiled.

"Just wait 'till I can run again. I'm gonna find you and tickle you to death." I warned. "You too, D" I added when Daniella snickered.

"Aunt Emmie, will save us!" Amelia cheered. We all laughed and when it all calmed down we slowly walked over to the grave.

We stood surrounding the knee high stone and one by one laid our flowers down and said a tiny hello and goodbye. Jerry and Camille had one girl each pressed to their fronts. Both looked heartbroken knowing that Evelyn wouldn't be here this Christmas. Bobby looked almost like a statue as he looked down at the ground and Angel was leaning on Emilie's other side. No one said anything while we stood there. No one needed or wanted to say or hear anything. We all let it sink in that this would be one of the most saddest Christmas' in a long time.

* * *

You'd think she was cooking for an army. She not only had the two counters filled with food but the table was also full. Bobby made the mistake of asking her why she cooked so much and earned a hot roll to the back of his head. He didn't think it was too funny but everyone else did.

"You look deep in thought there Jackie-Pooh." Angel said walking up behind me. I smirked over at him and flicked the ashes off my cigarette.

"Yeah, a little." I admitted. He leaned over the rail with me and scratched his head.

"You wanna share?" he asked slowly. "I mean, I know I ain't Diddle but, contrary to what Sofi says, I do listen."

"Just not to her?" I laughed and he nodded. "It's just weird. We're upset one minute and now we're joking around. Part of me feels guilty for being happy."

"But you know what that is?" he asked. I looked over at him and he smiled. "It's a reminder that life goes on. Even when the happiness catches you off guard, it's only saying that it's okay to be happy." I stared at him for a minute and noticed his eyes were slightly red.

"You just got done talking to Em, didn't you?" I asked. He laughed out loud and nodded.

"Yeah, you think I can actually come up with that on my own?" We laughed and slowly fell silent again.

"There it goes again." I whispered. "I always thought I'd be miserable after she was gone, but I don't. I'm sad, pissed and upset that she's gone but I don't feel like I thought I would."

"Well, we never really know how we will act until it happens." he told me. "And that came from me, not Diddle." he smirked. I chuckled and put my cigarette out in the ashtray.

"We better get inside before Camille send a search party." I said and turned to the door. Angel slapped a hand on my shoulder and squeezed.

"It'll be okay, Jack." he told me. I nodded and pulled the door open. We walked through the back hallway and into the kitchen where everyone was standing.

"I was about to come find you two." Camille smiled as she set the ham on the table. I chuckled and walked over to Emilie.

"Where are we going to sit?" she asked. I scratched my head and looked around. Before he could open his mouth Camille instructed people where to sit.

"Me and Jerry will take the ends and I'll have the girls on either side of me. Everywhere else is free game." she smiled again. I nodded and pulled the chair on the right side of Jerry out for Emilie.

"Why thank you." she winked and sat down. I sat down between her and Amelia while Bobby and Angel sat in front of us.

"Who wants to sat Grace?" Jerry called. Amelia and Daniella threw their hands up and we all laughed.

"We learned one at school before we got out." Daniella spoke up.

"You girls can say it together, okay?" Camille warned, so they wouldn't fight. They nodded and everyone grabbed hands and closed their eyes.

"God is great. God is good. Let us thank Him for our food. Amen!" the girls smiled when they opened their eyes. Me and Em couldn't help but chuckle and clap when they were done.

"That was amazing girls." Bobby smirked and kissed Daniella's head.

"Now let's eat damnit." Angel cheered and earned a smack from Bobby. Angel glared at him and pouted like a child.

"What you think because La Vida Loca ain't here, you won't get slapped?" Bobby asked, grabbing a roll.

"Man, it's Christmas, why you gotta talk about my girl like that?" Angel whined.

"Show some respect. We got kids in the room." Bobby told him.

"Show some respect to my girl then." Angel threw back.

"Why should I show her respect when she don't even respect herself?" Bobby laughed. I threw my head down and laughed as they bickered through dinner. I almost expected Camille to yell at them but she was in tears by the end of dinner from laughing so hard. I couldn't help but smile finally seeing that life does go on, we don't have to mourn forever.

* * *

"Alright, everyone get in here! It's getting late and the girls need to go to bed." Camille yelled from the living room. Bobby, Angel, Jack and Emilie laid down the cards they were playing in the kitchen and walked into the living room seeing the girls sitting in front of their presents.

"Any special order you want them opened?" Jerry asked.

"Open mine and Em's last." Jack told them. The girls nodded and grabbed the wrapped boxed that were from Bobby.

"I didn't know what to get you girls but I figured a new pair would be nice." he told them bashfully. The girls ripped the boxes open and squealed as they pulled out a new pair of ice skates. Daniella's had the letter D on it in pink and Amelia's had an A in purple.

"Thanks Uncle Bobby!" they squealed and ran to hug him. They showed their skates off to their parents and smiled.

"I was thinking they needed new ones, Bobby. Thanks." Camille smiled gratefully.

Angel smiled as they tore into a few tiny boxes from him and Sofi. They went out and bought them new clothes for the rest of the winter and summer. The girls fought for a moment when they were told they couldn't open the presents from Jerry and Camille but Bobby was quick to remind them that they still had presents from Jack and Emilie.

"Open this one first." Emilie smiled and handed the box to Amelia. She sat at Emilie and Jack's feet as she peeled the paper off the box and looked inside.

"It's a book." she smiled and pulled it out. She opened it to the middle and smiled up at Emilie. "You got it."

"Got what?" Jerry asked.

"A while back she was asking about my nick-name. I told her it was from a rhyme and she got interested and said she wanted to read more of them. So when Pais called me and told me there was this really old book of rhymes, poems and lullaby's, I had to." Emilie smiled over at Jerry and Camille.

"Aww that was sweet Em." Camille smiled. Amelia looked over at Emilie and Jack and smiled.

"Can you read me some tonight before we go to bed?" she asked. Emilie looked over at Camille who nodded.

"Of course, only a few though." she promised.

"Now for D's." Jack smiled and set the long box in front of her.

"Jesus, Jack. What did you get her?" Angel laughed. Jack smiled and sat back.

"You'll see." he told them. Emilie smiled and scooted down to the floor with Jack as Danielle ripped the paper off. Her eyes lit up when she looked in the box.

"Uncle Jack!" she shrieked and picked the small guitar up. Jerry and Camille groaned a little as she picked at the strings.

"Jack." Jerry scolded. Jack smirked at him and looked over at Daniella.

"Only condition is you have to let me teach you to play it. No messing it up or using it as a toy. It's not a toy." Jack told her.

"I won't mess it up, I promise. I won't touch it until you come over to teach me, I promise." she smiled then looked over at her parents. "Can Uncle Jack teach me? Please!"

"Yes, but don't be going around the house trying to play it when you can't." Camille laughed along with every else.

* * *

We went up stairs with the girls when we were done cleaning up. Jack sat with Daniella on her bed and I sat on Amelia's bed with her. After both were ticked in I pulled the book out.

"Do the one with your nickname first." Daniella smiled, pulling the covers up to her chin. I smiled and flipped through the pages and looked around when I found it.

"Ready?" I asked. Everyone nodded, including Jack and I began to read.

"Hey diddle, diddle. The cat played the fiddle. The cow jumped over the moon. The little dog laughed to see such sport. And the dish ran away with the spoon." I recited.

"That's wrong." Jack spoke up. I frowned and look over at him.

"Please, do explain." I asked. He smirked and sat up.

"Hey diddle, diddle. The cat and the fiddle. The cow jumped over the moon. The little dog laughed to see such a sight. And the dish ran away with the spoon." Jack recited. "That's the one I grew up with."

"Well, that's not in the book and I grew up with this one." I smiled and stuck my tongue out at him.

"Another." Amelia cheered. I smiled and flipped through the book. I found the one and I smirked, while looking over at Jack.

"Jack be nimble, Jack be quick. Jack jump over the candle stick. If Jack had jumped a little higher, he wouldn't have caught his pants on fire." The girls giggled and Jack just shook his head.

"That's real mean, Em." he smirked. "How about we read a Christmas story?" The girls nodded and I grabbed a book from under the nightstand.

"Both of you." Amelia told us. I moved to sit on the floor between the beds and Jack sat next to me as the girls finally started to fall asleep.

"'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse. The stockings were hung by the chimney with care, in hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there. The children were nestled all snug in their beds, while visions of sugar-plums danced in their heads and mamma in her 'kerchief, and I in my cap, had just settled down for a long winter's nap; When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter, I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter." I softly read out loud and passed the book to Jack. He sent me a tiny smiled and started to read.

"Away to the window I flew like a flash, tore open the shutters and threw up the sash. The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow gave the lustre of mid-day to objects below. When, what to my wondering eyes should appear but a miniature sleigh, and eight tiny reindeer, with a little old driver, so lively and quick, I knew in a moment it must be St. Nick." he read. I smiled listening to his deep voice so soft and soothing. "More rapid than eagles his coursers they came, And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;" I closed my eyes and spoke with him.

"Now, Dasher! now, Dancer! now, Prancer and Vixen! On, Comet! on Cupid! on, Donder and Blitzen! To the top of the porch! to the top of the wall! Now dash away! dash away! dash away all!" We said together and he passed the book back to me but I knew the rest by heart. I laid it down between us and moved into his arms as he laid his head back on the bed.

"As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly, when they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky, so up to the house-top the coursers they flew, with the sleigh full of toys, and St. Nicholas too. And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof the prancing and pawing of each little hoof as I drew in my hand, and was turning around, down the chimney St. Nicholas came with a bound. He was dressed all in fur, from his head to his foot, and his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot." I whispered into the silent room, smiling as Jack nuzzled my neck.

"A bundle of toys he had flung on his back, and he looked like a peddler just opening his pack. His eyes -- how they twinkled! his dimples how merry! His cheeks were like roses, his now like a cherry! His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow, And the beard of his chin was as white as the snow; The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth, and the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath; He had a broad face and a little round belly, that shook, when he laughed like a bowlful of jelly." Jack whispered back, pulling me tightly to him.

"He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf, and I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself; A wink of his eye and a twist of his head, soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread; He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work, and filled all the stocking, then turned with a jerk, and laying his finger aside of his nose, and giving a nod, up the chimney he rose" I pinched Jack's arm to let him to know finish it with me.

"He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle, and away they all flew like the down of a thistle. But I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight," we whispered. His lips moved for mine as we whispered the last bit. "Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night." His lips covered mine and his tongue sought mine greedily as we shared a long, soft kiss. It was a moment of pure tenderness and love. The reading of a Christmas story and relishing the fact that we were able to spend this day with each other.

"Why don't you want me to get you anything for Christmas?" I asked, when we pulled apart. He smiled softly and grabbed my hand.

"Because nothing can top the present that I was already given." he whispered. I tilted my head and looked at him intently.

"What's that?" I asked. He's quiet for a minute and looks away but when he looks back at me there's nothing but love swirling in his eyes.

"The second chance to live my life." he whispered. "And the chance to live it with you."


	25. Road Trip

**Okay first off I want to thank all of you who have reviewed. Sorry if I make this short but I've been busy the past few days. My sister just moved back and we've been all over town catching up. But secondly...takes big breath**

**Okay now I know it's been a little longer since I posted but I have an important tid bit to tell you. I do NOT have chapter 26 ready. Before I could write it, i had to plan the trip out and well I planned out a little further too. So to make sure I will end where I need to, I'm going to have to write what I have planned all together and then break it into chapters. I might be able to pull out three chapters from what I have planned. So be forewarned, it might be a while before this is updated. I am working on it while I'm updating my other stories but I have something coming up and I need to have it planned right and end right. I'm sorry if it sounds confusing but that's me...lol. So do not fret if this isn't updated for maybe a week and a half. I'm gonna try and get it done quick but the next few chapters are very, very important and emotional and they need to be prefect. But for now here is 26 and I hope you like it. :)**

* * *

The next morning was chaos. Pure chaos. We were all back at Bobby and Angel's place and of course, Bobby and Sofi were going at it. He wanted to go ahead and open the presents now, it was tradition for him. Sofi disagreed. She said they should wait until night time, it was her tradition. This is the part where you'd have the 'insert La Vida Loca joke here' sign and Bobby took it. I was too busy laughing to catch it in full but it was something along the lines of 'go back to the hut you came from and do your tradition there.' Then he had to add that she wasn't apart of this family and pushed her out the door, much to the disliking of Angel. That there started a whole new fight of why Bobby is an asshole, why Angel is brainwashed and why Sofi is still in the house. It was kind of funny, no it was really funny actually. I'm sure once me and Jack tell Jerry what went down he'd be ticked off that he missed it. But me and Jack made sure it was stored in our minds so we could remember it and laugh.

"See is this so bad?" I asked, when we finally sat down for breakfast. I couldn't take the yelling any longer and suggested we go ahead and eat breakfast, which was more like lunch after they shut up, and then we could open presents.

"That's a rhetorical question, right?" Bobby asked, still annoyed. I smiled at him and kept eating. I started to wash the dished when we were done but Bobby made Sofi do it. This time though she didn't argue like everyone thought. I cooked so she thought it was best for her to clean up. Bobby seemed kind of peeved that she didn't fight but quickly realized that he'd get to spend a few minutes without here and rushed everyone else into the living room.

"Don't be so pushy." I mumbled as he literally pushed me over to the tree. He smirked at me and grabbed a box.

"Hand this to Angel, it's from me." he told me. I passed it over to Angel and turned back to Bobby. "This is for Angel from you and Jack." I turned and handed another to Angel.

"Open them, Ang." Bobby ordered. Angel laughed and shook his head.

"It's Christmas, not a drill." he told Bobby. Bobby rolled his eyes and waved his hands for him to continue. Angel sighed and opened the one from Bobby first. The frowned and picked up what looked to be a shirt.

"You got me a shirt?" Angel asked. Bobby smirked and nodded.

"Read it." he told. Angel opened it up and started laughing.

"What's it say?" I asked. Angel passed it to Jack and he chuckled.

"The front says, 'Yes, I hear voices.' and the back says, 'And every single one is my girl going nag, nag, nag, nag, nag.'" Jack told me. I covered my mouth when I heard a pot drop to the floor and a minute later Sofi stormed in the room.

"Oh Bobby, you're such and idiot!" she screeched, snatching the shirt form Jack. "You have no clue what Christmas means. You're just a scrooge."

"Aye mami, don't be such a nag!" Bobby exclaimed, snatching the shirt back from her. Jack and Angel were laying on the couch laughing as I watched Bobby hold up a hand to Sofi's face.

"Nag, nag, nag, nag, nag!" He mocked, moving his hand like a puppet. I couldn't hold my laughter back and I fell in the swivel chair.

"Bobby you're so annoying." Sofi screamed.

"Nag, nag, nag, nag!" he mocked again. "See you're only proving the shirt right." I had tears pouring down my face when I finally stood up to stop the bickering.

"Alright, alright!" I yelled and took the shirt from Bobby. I threw it back to Angel and looked back at Bobby. "Is that all you got him?" I asked. Bobby shook his head and threw Angel another tinier box. Angel opened it and smiled.

"Thanks, Bobby." he said softly, picking up the gold watch in the box.

"Your's is looking kinda dingy so I thought I'd be nice." Bobby smirked. Angel stood up and hugged him.

"Merry Christmas, man." Angel whispered. I nodded and pointed to mine and Jack's box.

"Open ours now." I smiled. Angel winked at me and picked the box up. He pulled the box of the lid and laughed out loud again. He held up the box of white strips Jack had got.

"That was Jack's idea!" I yelled before he could come over and attack me. Angle reached over and punched Jack in the arm and I walked over to hand him his real present. I watched him open it and smile softly.

"That's from me actually. Jack has something for you in the back." I told him softly, as he flipped through the book. While he was overseas Evelyn saved all the letters he wrote home and when I found some old poems she wrote for him, I decided to put them into a book with pictures of him and her through the years.

"I love it, Diddle." he whispered, blinking back tears. I walked over to him and kissed his head. He laughed a little when he finally reached the back page.

"Thanks Jackie." he smiled as he picked up the silver chain and dog tag. He looked at the tag closely and saw on one side a faded image of me at my birthday and on the other a picture of Sofi.

"In case you ever have to go back. You'll have both of them with you." Jack told him. Angel reached over and hugged him before sliding it around his neck. I smiled and walked over to the tree.

"Now Bobby, this is from all three of us. Me, Jack and Ang." I smiled and pushed a big box over to him with my foot. He looked at all of us oddly and then looked down at the box before kneeling down. I ripped the paper off and used his knife to cut the tape on the box itself. He threw his head down when he looked inside.

"Are you kidding me?" he chuckled. I shook my head.

"Me and Jack saw it and had to get it. Ang threw in some money after we bought it to help for the amount." I smiled.

"How much was it?" he asked.

"Hey, now don't be asking that. It's not about the price, it's about the thought." Jack added in. Bobby smirked and pulled it out.

"Mr. Beer." he read aloud. He pulled out the mini keg and set it down. "Do you know how to do it?" he asked.

"Yeah, you put some water in it and mix in the beer packet. I think you let it set for about a week and then you bottle it. You leave it bottled for a week and then you can drink it. They have all kind of flavors. Ale and lights. It's supposed to be good." I said, sitting down next to him on the floor.

"You just can't sell it." Angel added.

"Yeah, that's illegal. But you can drink it for yourself." I smiled proudly.

"I guess that means Sofi gets a break from my beer runs, huh?" he joked. "Thanks, guys. I will definitely put this to use." he leaned over to hug me and I kissed his cheek.

"Now time for Jack's." Angel yelled and walked over to the closet. He looked at Jack before smiling. "You ready? This is from me, Bobby and Emilie." Jack sent me a little glare and I looked away innocently.

"Yeah, I'm ready." Jack smiled. Angle opened the closet and Jack's jaw nearly broke off. "Is that a 513?" he yelled and stood up to go to Angel. "A PRS model 513? You've got to be kidding me! These guitars go for at least 3,200."

"Hence, why we all pitched in to get it for you." Bobby smirked. Jack looked at all of us and smiled.

"Thanks, this is amazing." he smiled holding the new guitar up.

"I picked the color!" I smiled, standing up.

"I figured." he smirked and brushing his thumb across the strings. "Thank you guys."

"No problem, Jackie." Angel said patting his shoulder. "Now I do believe it's time for Diddle to open hers." I smiled sweetly and sat down as they grabbed my presents.

"This is from me." Angel smiled and handed me a box. I opened it and gaped at it.

"Angel you didn't have to." I whispered and picked up the new laptop.

"I know you need one for school. You take a lot of notes and I know you hate writing them down so I got you this." he smiled.

"Thanks, Angel." I smiled and hugged his neck.

"Mine!" Bobby yelled and handed me another box. I opened it and gaped again. "Don't say I didn't have to."

"I wasn't." I whispered and picked up the new camera.

"I haven't seen you take a single picture since I've been home." he told me softly. "Now use it. I paid 500 for that damn thing." he added. I laughed and kissed his cheek again.

"Thanks, Bobby." I said and placed the camera back in the box. I looked past him to a smirking Jack. He crooked his finger at me and wiggled it. I walked over to him and sat next to him on the couch throwing my legs over his. He slowly set a tiny velvet box in my lap and smiled. My heart beat faster as I looked at it.

"Jack, I thought-"

"Just open it." he whispered. I peeled the ribbon off and slowly opened the tiny box. Tears filled my eyes as I looked at the it. It was a 14 kt. white gold band with two heart shaped diamonds meeting together in the middle.

"I figured if I can't give you anything more right now, I can at least promise you." he whispered. I looked at him and smiled. He picked the promise ring up and slipped it on the finger next to my ring finger. "I promise that I will try to give you more and I promise I will always love you. No matter what." he smiled. I leaned down and kissed him softly.

"That better be a promise ring." Angel warned.

"It is." I sighed, smiling.

"Good because I don't remember Jack asking me for your hand in marriage." Angel joked. We all laughed and I tucked my head into Jack's neck.

"Well, Merry Christmas everybody." Bobby announced and stood up. "Now how about a game of hockey?"

"I'll go." Angel said standing up. "Jackie, Em?"

"I'd go if I could play but I think I'll rest." he told them. I nodded and looked over at them.

"I'll pass for now." I told them. They nodded and Angle yelled for Sofi.

"You coming, babe?" I heard Bobby sigh and start yelling again.

"Don't invite her!" he yelled.

"Oh, Bobby!" she yelled as she followed them outside. I laughed and snuggled into Jack's side.

"This was one interesting day." he stated, running a hand through my hair. I nodded and nuzzled his neck with my nose and lips.

"Yes, it has." I whispered. I felt him shiver and shift a little. I smirked and slowly moved one leg over his lap and sat down. He smirked up at me and placed a hand on the back of neck, pulling me down for another kiss. I moved into him more as he deepened the kiss and snaked his hands up the back of my shirt. I only pulled back when he went to pull it off.

"Not here." I whispered and stood up, pulling him with me. I ran upstairs and flung his bedroom door open. I didn't know who close he was behind me until I turned around and his lips crashed onto mine. He kicked the door shut with his good leg and pushed me over to his bed, lips still attached to mine. I tugged on his shirt and he reluctantly pulled his lips of mine so I could pull it off. My hands traced up his stomach to his chest. My fingers and eyes stopped in the four inch scar on his shoulder. I traced it lightly and let out a shaky breath. He grabbed my hands and made me look up at him.

"Don't think about it." he whispered and leaned down to kiss me softly. The rush we were feeling a minute ago was still there but it wasn't as hurried. He slowly peeled my clothes off me and kissed his way up and down my body, remembering what it felt like. Even the tiniest kiss on my chest or stomach pushed a gasp from my lips. The feeling of his skin on mine again was almost enough to send me over the edge right there.

"Jack." I moaned, when his fingers hooked around the edge of my panties and pulled them down. I looked down to see him smirking as he pulled them over my feet and threw them down. He kissed the top of my foot before standing to take his pants off. He didn't waste time though, he let the boxers go with them.

"Still on the pill?" he asked. I nodded and leaned up to grab his hands. I pulled him down on top of me and smiled. He settled himself between my legs and snaked one arm under me.

"I love you." he whispered in my ear. I opened my mouth to say it back but he stopped me by pushing into me. I let out a long gasp and bit my bottom lip.

"God Jack." I moaned. He smirked down at me and leaned down to capture my lips with his. I tangled my fingers tightly into his hair as he pumped inside of me. He broke our kiss to bury his face in my neck and pulled my closer to him with the arm he had wrapped around me. His other hand was firmly pressed into my hip, steadying me as we meet each other in the most intimate way. I release his hair and raked my nails down his shoulders and back. Both of us knew it wouldn't be too long before we reached our limit. It had been way too long and had waited was patiently as possible but time had taken it's toll.

"I vow to never go that long without sex again." I promised, breathless as he rolled off of me. He chuckled and pulled me to his side.

"I'm going to hold you to that." he promised back. I laughed and looked up at him.

"I don't doubt that for one second."

* * *

We left Bobby and Angel's after they got back. When we got to her place she walked in the room and passed out. I wanted to do the same thing but for some reason I was wide awake.

"Where the hell does she keep the pens?" I muttered, snatching every drawer open to try and find a pen. I had flipped through the television stations but found nothing so the next logical thing for me to do was to write. I had this song and melody that would not leave me alone and I had to get it out.

I finally pulled a drawer out and found a pen laying on top of a bunch of papers. I sighed and picked it up. I was about to close it but a tiny yellowed piece of paper caught my eye. I picked it up and realized it was the address that Evelyn had saved for Emilie.

14232 Rolland Dr.

Salem, Mass.

I closed the drawer and walked over to the kitchen table staring at the paper. Emilie had told me she got Green to run it but didn't recognize the owner's name. And the last time she lived in Salem was with her parents, so she didn't recall the street name. He wasn't sure why she didn't want to go see about the address but she made sure to tell them that she wasn't ready. If Evelyn kept it from her for this long, there was a reason. She wanted to focus on us and I was okay with that but this needed to be solved soon.

I tucked the paper in my pocket and slid his notebook over to him. He opened it to the first clean page and then grabbed his guitar. He closed his eyes before tuning the guitar. He needed to find the song and the melody again.

"When you feel all alone and the world has turned its back on you. Give me a moment please to tame your wild, wild heart. I know you feel like the walls are closing in on you. It's hard to find relief and people can be so cold, when darkness is upon your door and you feel like you can't take anymore." I sang softly.

I strummed the guitar and stopped to pick up the pen and write down the first few lines. I sat there for about an hour and a half before I heard the soft padding of Emilie's feet coming down the hall.

"Hey." she whispered, walking into the kitchen. I closed my notebook and set my guitar down. She smiled when I opened my arms and waved her to come sit in my lap. "What were you writing?" she asked.

"Nothing, just fiddling around." I told her. She looked up at me and smirked.

"Is it a secret?" she asked.

"Yes, it's a secret." I chuckled and kissed her head. "I was thinking earlier."

"Did you hurt yourself?" she asked, stifling a yawn. I pinched her butt and laughed when she squeaked.

"Seriously, I was thinking earlier." I told her again.

"About what, babe?" she asked.

"We need a vacation." I stated. She giggled in my neck and nodded.

"Yes, we do. But we don't have the money nor the time to go on vacation." she told me.

"Well, not to Hawaii for a week but we can get out of Detroit for a little bit." I suggested.

"I start school in two weeks." she reminded me.

"You have a lap top and they offer online courses." I told her. She sat up in my lap and looked at me.

"You really did think about this, huh?" she asked.

"I think we need it." I told her honestly. She looked at me for a minute and leaned back into me.

"Where would we go?" she asked. I took a deep breath and let it out before answering her.

"Massachusetts." I told her simply. "Salem, Boston, Dorchester. All the places you lived."

"Why?" she asked, quietly.

"Because I want to see where you grew up. And you haven't been there since Abigail died." I whispered. She didn't move or say anything for a few minutes and I finally lifted her up to look at her. "Talk to me."

"You're going to make me go to the address aren't you?" she asked, softly. I picked her chin up and made her look at me.

"Not if you don't want to." I told her firmly. "I just want to get out of Detroit for a while and let you see your parents again and Abigail. You've seen me and my childhood. Now I wanna see yours." She sniffed a little and nodded.

"Okay." she agreed and looked up at me. "I'd like that." she smiled. I kissed her lips gently and pulled her back to me.

"Good. We'll leave on Sunday." I told her.

"But it's Friday." she reminded.

"I know that. Two days is long enough to pack." I chuckled.

"Where are we going to stay and how are we going to get there?" she asked.

"We are going to drive and we'll get hotel rooms." I told her. "That sound good?" I asked. She sighed and nodded her head against my chest.

"Yes. I've always wanted to go on a road trip." she laughed.

"Well, it will be my pleasure to take you on one." I smirked. "Actually, it'll be my pleasure to-" I chuckled against her hand.

"What has gotten into you?" she asked, amused. I cocked my head to the side and stared at her.

"Do you really want me to answer that?" I asked through her hand. She pinched my arm and settled back into my arms again.

Now I just needed to convince her to go to the address.


	26. December 27th28th

**Okay sorry it's taken so long. This is more of a filler but I wanted to post something...lol. Thanks for the reviews. I was all excited about the Christmas then after I got to it, it wore me out...lol! But I'm glad you all liked it!! :)**

* * *

December 27th-

After the initial shock they Jack and Emilie were leaving on a road trip, everyone finally left the apartment to let them pack. Emilie wanted everyone to meet her at her place so if anyone protested the decision, she could kick them out. For the most part everyone was okay with it. Bobby was thinking it was his fault and that he pushed them to the limit but Jack made sure he knew that it was his idea and not Emilie's. Angel actually asked to go with them and frowned when Emilie told him no, it was a couple's things. Jerry was excited for them and kept telling them to take lots of pictures to bring back. Paisley only wanted to make sure that they would have phones or some way of communication so they could keep in touch and know that they aren't dead or kidnapped by some crazy witch lady in Salem. Everyone laughed at that one.

And after an hour of telling everyone that everything would be okay and that they would stay in touch, Jack and Emilie finally got to start packing.

"I was hoping to leave earlier than this." Jack grumbled while looking at the clock. Emilie laughed and zipped up her suitcase.

"We'll be on the road at 3pm, Jack. That's not that bad." she told him. He grabbed her bag and carried it into the living room.

"Well, that means we'll have to stop tonight and we won't get to Boston until tomorrow morning." Jack whined. Emilie laughed as she followed him down the hall and grabbed his hands once he set her things down. She wrapped his arms around her waist and looked up at him.

"We have two weeks to go to Boston and back, okay? So what if we have to get a room tonight, it's not going to kill us." she told him. He looked down at her and sighed.

"Are you a bad car rider?" he asked. "Because I will drop you tiny ass out on the side of the road if you pull an Angel and ask how long 'till we get there or ask to go use the bathroom every 50 miles or so." Emilie giggled and leaned up to kiss him on the lips.

"I'm a good rider." she winked and walked back to the bedroom to finish packing. Jack chuckled and watched her go. When he saw she had disappeared, he slipped his hand into his pocket to make sure he had the address with him. He wasn't going to force it on her but he was going to have it just in case.

"Jack, are you sure you got everything?" Emilie yelled from the bedroom. She was so nervous that they were going to forget something really important and have to buy it or do without. She looked up as Jack entered the room.

"Yes, we've got everything. We've packed stuff we won't even need. Now can we go it's almost 3pm." he rushed. Emilie sighed and looked around the apartment one last time before looking at Jack and smiling.

"Okay, let's go." she cheered. Jack smirked and grabbed the last bag and followed her out the front door. He loaded all their things into the back of her car and Jack took his place behind the wheel. As he pulled out onto the road Emilie checked the time.

"See? I told you we'd be on the road by 3pm." she smirked. He looked over at her and shook his head, laughing.

* * *

She didn't like this. But she also wasn't going to verbalize how much she didn't like this. It would give him opportunity to rub it in her face and laugh at her. She then would commence to whining the whole way to the destination and by the time they would get to Boston for a tiny vacation and break, they'd be pissed off at each other. So Emilie kept her mouth shut and Jack kept on driving.

"So I figured we'll be in Rochester around 9pm." Emilie sighed looking at the map on her laptop. "You wanna get a room there for tonight?" she asked, looking over at a very bored Jack.

"Yeah, that's like half way to Boston right?" he asked.

"Yeah. It almost 7 hours from Rochester to Boston, so we can get up early and make it there late afternoon." she smiled.

"That works but I don't want to get up too early." he said yawning. She laughed and shut her lap top.

"How can you be tired? It's only 7pm, Jack."

"I've been driving for four hours straight. My ass is numb and my legs are cramping." he told her.

"I told you I should drive." she reminded him.

"I know but it's usually the guy driving and I really wanted to drive. You've been my taxi since the accident and I really wanted you to relax." he smiled, grabbing her hand.

"But honey, if you're hurting, I'm not relaxing. I'm worrying." she told him. "So how about you let me drive the last two hours? I'll be fine until we get to Rochester and if I get tired before then, I'll stop." she suggested. Jack sighed and moved over to the side of the highway and parked the car.

"Fine but I'm relaxing in the tub either tonight or tomorrow and I'm driving you to Boston." he told her and unbuckled his seatbelt. Emilie smiled and scooted over the center console to the driver's seat as Jack walked around the car. He got in and looked over at her.

"If you get tired, stop." he warned her. She smiled and moved back onto the highway. Jack moved the seat all the way back and stretched his legs out as much as he could.

Emilie was quiet as she drove, she knew Jack was tired and didn't want to disturb him. Even as he spoke to her, she kept her answers short and soft. Soon, he dozed off and she turned the radio on low. She breathed in the fresh air as she drove and smiled. She was going home. Not for good or for long but she was going there. Sure, there was a lot of hurt there but she needed to see Abigail. She needed to see her parents and the place the place she once felt safe. She wanted Jack to see it too. He had only ever heard of her childhood as a bunch of death. And it was but there were also good things, she wanted him to see that.

"Jackie." Emilie whispered, running her fingers through his hair. He had slept the rest of the way to Rochester and she had already gotten them a hotel room. "Baby, wake up." Jack opened his eyes and looked around, as he stretched.

"What time is it, Em?" he asked and crawled out the car.

"A little after 9pm. I already got a room and the key." she smiled and grabbed the bag with their night clothes. She led him to the room and walked inside.

"You should have woken me up." he told her and sat down on the king sized bed. She laid the bag on the table and walked over to the bed. She laid down next to him and he looked down at her.

"I was fine." she smiled up at him. He moved a hand to rub across the exposed skin of her stomach and smiled.

"Well, now I'm wide awake." he told her casually. She giggled and reached up to grab the collar of his shirt. She pulled him down on top of her and kissed him. His tongue sought hers greedily but she resisted. He pulled back and stared at her, confused.

"What?" he asked. She laughed and propped herself up on her elbows.

"Just because you're wide awake does not mean I am. I've been driving. I wanna take a shower and go to bed." she smiled and moved from beside him. He gaped at her as she strode over to the bathroom and turned the shower on. She smiled when she felt his eyes on her as she undressed and stepped into the shower. She stepped under the water and sighed feeling her muscles relax. She waited for a few minutes to see if Jack would join her but when he didn't she started washing her hair.

Jack sat on the bed as she purposely teased him in the bathroom. He watched her tiny hips shake as she tugged her jeans off and watched her stomach stretch when she stripped her shirt off. He was entranced as she did this and was going to join her right then and there but decided against it. He knew she wanted him to go in there but he was going to make her wait. He sat on the bed staring into the bathroom and at the nearly see through glass shower door. He tilted his head as he watched her move around in the shower and eventually realized he was only hurting himself more. He undressed at the door of the bathroom and quietly opened the shower door when she was washing the shampoo out of her hair.

She had to give it to him, he was sneaky. If it hadn't have been for his sudden presence behind her, she wouldn't have known he was there. She didn't hear the door open or hear him in the bathroom at all. She smiled as she finished rinsing the shampoo out of her hair and when she went to turn to him, she couldn't. Jack wrapped one arm around her waist and pulled her against him. His lips found her slick neck and nibbled lightly as she bit her lip smiling.

"Jackie." she whispered. "I thought I said I was tired." she giggled as he continued to nibble and nip at her neck. He was ignoring her, of course. His main concern at the moment was the ever growing heat that was building up in him and trying to satisfy it. He held her tighter as his other hand moved down her stomach and between her legs. He didn't give her any warning at all when he moved a finger inside of her. Her legs got weak and Jack moved against the wall to steady them and hold her up. She leaned her head back onto his shoulder as he began to work her over. She moaned and bit her lip as he moved his fingers and rubbed her mercilessly. Her knees buckled when she came but Jack's grip on her held her to him and she panted trying to catch her breath.

"Remind me not to tease you anymore." she breathed. Jack smirked and pushed them off the wall and turned her to face him. She went to grab the door but he slapped her arm away.

"Who said I was done?" he grinned and pulled her to him once again. Her hands ran up his chest and to his hair as he lifted up one of her legs and wrapped it around his waist. He moved so her back was against the wall and kissed her one more time before sliding his length inside of her. They let out simultaneous moans as he fit himself inside her. Her hands pulled his head down to rest on hers as he slowly moved inside her. He looked down at her as the tiny droplets of water ran down her face and her nose. She looked up at him and when their eyes met his lips crashed onto hers in a passionate kiss. She pulled him closer and pulled him in deeper when she adjusted her leg. He quickened his pace and moved his mouth over Emilie's when her moans became louder. He didn't want anyone complaining about them. A few moments later he felt her walls tighten around him and she bit down on his lip as she came. He groaned at her bit and couldn't stop from releasing himself of her. His lips moved from hers when he was done and he smirked.

"Tired now?" he asked, seeing her eyes close. She smiled and opened them to look at him.

"Actually, yes." she laughed and kissed him one last time before getting out the shower. They dried each other off and changed for bed. Jack smiled when Emilie threw a leg over his good one and pulled it to her. He kissed her forehead and she buried her face in his neck and closed her eyes.

* * *

December 28th-

She wasn't sure how she got into the car without waking up but she did. She woke up the soft sounds of Hinder coming out the speakers in her car. She scooted to the upright position in her seat and looked over at Jack.

"How?" was all she asked. Jack looked over at her and smirked.

"I woke up at 6am and waited for you to get up but you never did. At 8am I got bored and carried you to the car and packed up our stuff to leave." he smiled.

"You could have woken me up, ya know?" she told him and pressed the button on the radio to show the time, 11:24am.

"I tried." Jack grinned and pointed to a sign. "I ate at 6am but haven't had lunch yet, you hungry?" Emilie nodded and covered her mouth as she yawned. "Sleep good?"

"Do you even have to ask?" she asked, leaning over to kiss him real quick. Jack just grinned and waited for his exit. "Can we eat at a real restaurant, please? I'm tired of fast food grease and gas station junk food." she pleaded as Jack pulled off the interstate and onto the ramp.

"Yeah, we'll sit down and eat." he smiled. He drove about a mile down until he saw an actual restaurant and pulled into the parking lot. "This good?" he asked as Emilie looked around.

"Yeah, it's not McDonald's." she smiled and got out the car. They walked into the tiny diner and smiled at the hostess.

"Hello, welcome to McKay's. I'm Linzi and I'll be your waitress. Just the two of you?" she smiled. Jack nodded and Linzi grabbed the menus. They followed the middle aged woman down a few rows until they were seated at a booth. Jack sat on one side and Emilie took the other.

"What can I get you to drink?" the waitress asked.

"Coke, please." Jack told her.

"Water with lemon." Emilie smiled and the lady walked off. "This is nice." Emilie smiled as she looked around. Jack nodded and grabbed one of the menus.

"What do you want?" he asked as he looked it over. Emilie took the other one and sighed.

"Humm, I'll probably get the," she mumbled. "Chicken BLT." she smiled. Jack smirked and shook his head.

"That's what I was going to say." he told her. The waitress came back with their drinks and smiled.

"You read to order?" she asked. Jack nodded and laid the menus to the side.

"Two Chicken BLT's. One white bread and one on wheat. No mayo on the white bread please." he ordered. The lady scribbled the order down and smiled as she walked off.

"I'm surprised no ones called yet." Emilie said as she picked her drink up. Jack bit his lip and tried to hide his smile. Emilie saw this and stared at him. "They have haven't they?" she asked. Jack looked away and ignored her question.

"Jack." she hissed. He sighed and nodded.

"Angel, Bobby and Paisley all called this morning. Not at the same time but they did." he told her.

"Well, what did they say?" she asked. He smirked a little and reached his hands out to grab hers.

"Well, they said something about us not calling yesterday and to call them back, or else." he told her. Emilie stared at him and processed what he had just said.

"They said call them back? Why would they tell you to call them back, Jack?" she asked, hoping he wasn't about to tell her what she thought he was going to tell her.

"Well, see that's the thing." he started. "I didn't really talk to them." And she was right.

"You didn't answer?" she asked and he shook his head. "You let them leave a voice mail?" He nodded. "Why?" he shrugged and she sighed. "You're hopeless."

"But you love me." he grinned. She tried to glare at him but ended up smirking. "Seriously, I'm glad that they miss us and want to make sure we're okay, but I wanted this to be a me and you thing. I don't want them calling and bugging us 24/7 so I turned the phone down and checked them later. I also changed the voice message so they know that I am ignoring them." he smirked. Emilie laughed and nodded her head.

"They're going to kill you when we get back." she told him.

"Maybe so but at least I got to spend time with you and only you." he grinned and leaned over to meet her half way in a kiss. They parted when someone cleared their throat. Emilie blushed when she saw the waitress holding their plates.

"White bread?" she asked. Jack raised his hand and she set the plates down. They ate and chatted quietly. Jack paid the bill and left a tip as they left.

"That was good." Jack sighed and started the car.

"Yes, much better than a greasy burger or a frozen sandwich." Emilie smiled. "You sure you wanna finish driving?" she asked. He looked at the watch and his map.

"It's almost 1pm and we've got about three more hours to go. I can do that." he told her. She nodded and sat back in her seat. She pulled her sunglasses off the sun visor and placed them on her face. Jack smirked as she got comfy and he pulled back onto the road.

About an hour later and nothing else to talk about, Jack slipped in a CD. Emilie watched as he skipped through half the CD to find a song. Emilie laughed when the guitar broke through the speakers.

"What it's a good driving' song." Jack smiled over at her and started to sing along. Emilie shook her head and closed her eyes as he sang along to Pearl Jam.

_Freezin', rests his head on a pillow made of concrete, again.  
Oh, feelin' maybe he'll see a little better set a days, ooh yeah  
Oh hand out faces that he sees time again ain't that familiar, ooh yeah  
Oh, dark grin he can't help when he's happy, looks insane ooh_

_Even flow, thoughts arrive like butterflies  
Oh, he don't know so he chases them away-yeah  
Oh, someday, yea, he'll begin his life again  
Life again, Life again_

_Kneeling, looking through the paper though he doesn't know to read, ooh yeah  
Oh, praying now to something that has never showed him anything  
Oh, feeling understands the weather of the winters on its way  
Oh, ceilings few and far between all the legal halls of shame, hey_

_Even flow, thoughts arrive like butterflies  
Oh, he don't know so he chases them away-yeah  
Oh, someday yet he'll begin his life again  
Oh, whispering hands gently lead him away  
Him away, him away  
Yeah  
Woo, Ah Yeah, fuck your money_

_(Guitar Solo - Breakdown)_

_Even flow, thoughts arrive like butterflies  
Oh, he don't know so he chases them away-yeah  
Ah someday yet he'll begin his life again, yeah  
Oh, whispering hands gently lead him away  
Him away, him away  
Yeah  
Woo, Uh huh yeah, yeah, yeah, momma mommy_

* * *

Jack pulled into the parking lot of the hotel and looked over at Emilie. He decided to wait to wake her up and went to get a room. He got the key and frowned when he got one on the second floor. He got back in the car and grabbed his medicine bottle and water. He took a pain pill in case his leg acted up and looked back over at his sleeping girlfriend.

"Babe, wake up." he whispered and fingered her hair. "We're in Boston." Emilie opened her eyes and leaned up in the seat.

"How long have I been asleep?" she asked.

"Only an hour." he smirked and got out of the car. She smiled when she stepped into the parking lot. "Happy?" he asked.

"Yes, very much so." she grinned and ran over to him. She jumped on him and he laughed. He picked her up and carried her over to the stairs.

"We got a second story room?" she asked. He nodded and started to make his way up the stairs. "Jackie, I don't want you to hurt your leg." she complained.

"I took a pill, I'll be fine." he told her and finished carrying her to the door and slide the card in the door. She smiled as he kicked the door closed and took her over to the bed. He laid her down and took his spot on top of her. She giggled and put her hands on his chest.

"You're kidding, right?" she asked. He smirked and shook his head.

"It's not a road trip unless we christen every room we stay in." he told her slyly and started unbuttoning her shirt.

"And if we flew?" she asked.

"Well, then we'd be in the Mile High Club." he grinned and pulled her shirt off her shoulders. She smiled and pulled him down for a kiss.

* * *

Evenflow by Pearl Jam


	27. December 29th30th

**I didn't specifically add Dec. 29th because there wasn't much to it so I just summarized it in the first para. I had a rough day today trying to write this though...lol. I hope it's okay. And I hope you all like it, i'm not too find of it myself but my review isn't the one that counts. Well, enjoy! :) P.S. Crash and Burn by Savage Garden...it all comes full circle...lol**

**And to my reviews for last chapter, thank you so much. BEG I had to add that last part...lol. Jack's been kind of frisky lately so i had too! Other thanks to lemmopie and StraighEdgeQueen...:)**

* * *

December 30th-

Yesterday was their lazy day. It was their first full day in Boston and all they wanted to do was relax and look around. Emilie had taken him to go see her old house and the place where Abigail worked after she left Detroit. Through out that day he realized how alike his mom and Abigail were. They had the same heart and the same outlook on like. They loved the same things and would give anything to help a child in need. He was surprised that Emilie was as calm as she was when they drove through her old neighborhood. He vaguely remembered moving all of her stuff out of that house and moving it back to his. And even though they didn't do much except drive, at the end of the day, they were tired.

But Emilie didn't sleep well. She knew that December 30th would be a day she hated for a long time.

This was the part of the trip Emilie dreaded. The part that she wished she could run far, far away from and never look back. It was the part where she had to face her fear and face reality. Today was the firs day of many tears. Today she was going to see Abigail for the first time in almost two years. Not once had she traveled from Detroit to see her. Not once did she think about it. It's not that she didn't want to see Abigail or that she didn't miss or love her, she did and that was why. Emilie was afraid to see the reality, once again, that Abigail was gone. Evelyn had offered to drive her up here to pay her respects on the one year anniversary of her death but all Emilie could do was cry in her room. She might have done it if Jack had been there but he wasn't.

"Well, I'm here now." Jack whispered. Emilie had been ranting about how she couldn't go see her and that she had gone this long without doing it, why not keep going. Then she mentioned how she would have done it last year if he was there and now here they were, sitting in the hotel room staring at one another.

"I don't want to." she whispered back. Jack took her tiny hands in his and kissed her knuckles.

"It's not about what you want to do, Emilie. You need to see her." he told her firmly. Emilie sighed and looked at him.

"I'll cry. I'll cry a lot and I'll probably bug the hell out of you." she told him. Jack smirked a little and nodded.

"Then that gives me a reason to hold you." he told her. She smiled and ran a hand through his hair.

"You don't need a reason to hold me." she whispered. He nodded and kissed her hand again.

"Then why are you so worried?" he asked. She sighed again and looked over at the clock. Almost noon. "If we're going to do this, we need to do it." Jack said, trying not to sound rude or pushy. Emilie took a deep breath before looking back at him and nodding.

"Alright." she whispered. Jack kissed her head and stood up, holding his hand out for her. She grabbed his hand and let him pull her off the bed and into his arms again. She buried her face into his chest and sighed deeply.

"It'll be okay." Jack whispered. Emilie nodded and moved from him to grab her coat. She slipped it on and looked over at tack standing by the door. He could still see the worry in her eyes and her hesitance as she walked over to him. That killed him. Not being able to make her feel better or make her smile, it was hard for him and part of him hated himself for making her do this. But she needed to. They both knew that.

All the way to the cemetery Emilie was quite. She sat straight up in her seat and looked out the window as Jack drove. She had both hands tightly clasped around one of Jack's and even thought it was tough to drive at times, he wouldn't dare take his hand away from hers. He wanted her to know he was not going anywhere, that he would always be there no matter what.

As Jack pulled into the cemetery Emilie's eye scanned the green pasture that was filled the patches of dirt and dull gray headstones. She hadn't been here in almost two years but she remembered being here like it was yesterday.

"_I can't." she whispered. He kept his hand out and stared at her._

"_Yes, you can. And you need to. Abigail needs a goodbye from you of all people. I'll be right next to you and Ma will be on the other side." he told her._

_Emilie slowly grabbed Jack's hand and he wrapped his fingers around hers. He moved back to help her out the car. She stepped out and sighed when her feet touched the ground. Emilie looked at Jack and he nodded. She let his hand go and walked up to Evelyn. She grabbed her hand and we sat down. Jack did as he said, he sat one side while Evelyn sat on her other. Angel, Bobby and Jerry stood behind her. Everyone got in their places as the minister said his words. They were all a blur though. She wasn't paying attention to him. The only thing Emilie saw was the gleaming silver casket in front of her. The one that held her mother._

Emilie's eyes watered remembering that day. She remembered feeling the complete sorrow of loosing yet another parent and the feeling of not knowing what life was going to throw at her next. Jack felt her hand tighten as he parked the car. She reluctantly let his hand go and they exited the car. She stood like a statue by the car and waited for Jack to come get her. To hold her as they walked to the last place she wanted to be. To comfort her like he had for some many long teary nights.

_Emilie grabbed Jack's pillow and cried into. A few minutes later she felt and big hand on her back and looked up. She saw the sad eyes of Jack Mercer staring at me. He pulled her up and wrapped his arms around her. She clung to him for dear life as she cried into his shoulder._

"_I don't know what to do anymore." she cried softly. He rubbed her back and leaned back onto the bed._

"_It's okay." he whispered. "Just remember that you're not alone, okay?" _

Emilie gave Jack's hand a light squeeze, silently telling him she needed to do this alone. Jack kissed her head before she finished the tiny path to Abigail's grave. He watched from a few feet away as she kneeled down to the gray stone and bowed her head.

She clasped her hands together, trying to find some kind of comfort. She didn't open her eyes to look at the name on the stone, fearing it would be too much. Instead she tried to remember the woman that she loved and missed dearly.

"_Today's a big day, Em. You're getting your license. That's a step toward freedom." she smiled and hand my a cup of coffee. Emilie smiled and took it._

"_That's if you won't get all emotional and turn around like last time." she teased. She gasped and put a hand to her chest in mock surprise._

"_Me? All emotional? Never." she joked. "No, we're getting it this time. You're seventeen and you know how to drive, so there is no reason that you shouldn't get it." Abigail told her. Emilie smiled and picked at her eggs._

"_Promise you won't make up some excuse and turn around?" she asked pointing her fork at Abigail. Abbi laughed and stole a piece of her bacon. Emilie slapped her hand and she laughed._

"_I promise. And if I do I promise it will be better than last time." she smiled. Emilie choked on her coffee and remembered her excuse for last time. They were nearly there and out of the blue she pulls a u-turn and heads for the market. She said she had to do grocery shopping because today was the day the truck unloaded and it's better to shop when it's first unloaded._

"_Yes, please. That was a bust and you know it." Emilie said wiping the coffee off her chin. She smiled softly and looked away. Emilie knew she was getting ready to cry and she put her hand over Abigail's._

"_It's just that you're growing up so fast." she told her softly. Emilie rubbed her hand and moved her tray to the side._

"_I was already grown when you got me, mom." she told her. Abigail laughed and looked at her._

"_You thought you were grown. You were still very much in need of a mother figure." she smiled. Emilie scooted over to her and hugged her._

"_And I got one. And you did a damn good job." she whispered. She laughed into Emilie's shoulder and pulled back. Emilie wiped a few tears away and smiled._

"_I tried. But I'm so proud of you. You've gone from a hurt little girl to a very smart young woman. I'm just happy you let me in." she said holding her hands._

"_I thought you were an angel. You had this light around you. It wasn't hard for me to trust you. I love you, mom." Emilie told her and smiled. She hugged her again and stood up._

"_I love you too."_

"That was supposed to be a great day." Emilie whispered to herself. The tears filled her closed eyes but refused to let them drop. Abigail wouldn't want her to cry. She'd want her to be happy but it was so hard. It was hard to smile or laugh when all you wanted to do was cry and scream at the world.

Emilie felt her heart start to break when the image of Abigail's smiling face from that morning slowly disappeared. Her tears became more insistent for a release as that night played in her head.

"_It's just a box. I tried to miss it." Abigail said looking over at Emilie. "Go back to sleep, dear." she smiled. Emilie smiled and then looked forward to see a semi-truck crossing into out lane. Emilie saw the bright lights in their faces as she screamed._

"_Mom!" she screamed as Abigail turned back to the road._

Her eyes squeezed shut as she remembered the bright lights of the semi and she let out a sob when Abigail's face appeared.

_The only thing she heard was the faint sound of the trucks engine. She titled my head to the side and looked over at Abigail. The truck had hit on her side. Emilie saw her head facing her and blood dripping off her chin. She sobbed and frantically tried to move. She jerked the seatbelt out of the buckle and unwrapped it from her body. She pushed herself out of the window and fell to the ground. She got on my feet and looked around. She could still see the smoke from the brakes of the truck. She let out a frustrated scream and limped over to her mom's side of the car. There was about two feet between Abigail's car door and the trucks front. She squeezed in between them and felt Abigail's neck._

"_It's okay mom. I'm getting you out."_

Jack's eyes filled with tears and fought the temptation to go over there and hold her as she broke down. He hated not being able to hold her and console her. He hated that she was having to go through it all over again.

Emilie's fingers dug into the ground as she hunched over and cried. Her tears spilled down her cheeks and chin to the already moist ground below her. The feeling of complete pain and hurt washed over her once again as the images of the EMT's lights flashed through her mind. She covered her face and tried to shake the image of the EMT as he checked on Abigail.

"_She's gone."_

"Why? Why did you leave me alone?" she sobbed, letting her head fall into her hands on the ground. "Why?" she screamed and hit the ground with a fist. Jack couldn't take it anymore and rushed over to her as she hit the ground mercilessly.

"Baby, calm down." he whispered, trying to control his voice. He rubbed her back as she turned to him and sobbed into his chest. "Think about the good things." he whispered.

"_We worked together in Boston forever. She was one of my closest friends. I trusted her with everything. I still do and we haven't talked in years. She adopted four boys of her own. They were bounced around like you and took them in." Abigail told Emilie._

"_She sounds nice. I'd love to meet her." she smiled._

"_She is. She's a saint."_

Evelyn. Emilie held her breath and slowly opened her eyes and stared at the stone. Abigail never left her alone. She left her the best family she could have ever had after such an event. She let her breath out as Jack rubbed her back and kissed her head. When she calmed herself down, she closed her eyes again. She let out a tiny whimper when she was Abigail smiling at her.

"_Thank you." Emile told her as they were leaving. Abigail looked over at her and smiled._

"_For what?" she asked. Emilie stopped and grabbed her hand._

"_For taking care of me. And for loving me when I didn't think it was possible." she smiled softly. Her eyes sparkled with tears as she hugged her daughter._

"_No, thank you for letting me in. You have no idea how much you mean to me, Emilie. I love you like you are my own." she whispered. Emilie pulled back and smiled._

"_I am yours."_

"I am yours. I always was and always will be." she mumbled and opened her eyes again. Jack pushed her away from him a little and looked down at her.

"Are you okay?" he asked.

"_You okay?" Jack asked. Emilie laughed sarcastically and looked over at him._

"_I'll be fine if everyone quits asking me that." she told him. He nodded and leaned on the tree._

"_I'm not okay, Jack." She whispered after a few minutes. _

Emilie stared at him and smiled a little. After two years, two long years of ups and downs, of love and loss, she felt she could be honest now. She wiped her face with the back of her hand and sighed.

"I'm okay." she told him. He gave her a sad smile and kissed her forehead. Her eyes closed when his soft lips touched her head. She was okay. She might not have Abigail or Evelyn but both knew that she had Jack. He took care of her and she took care of him. After the tears, this was what was meant to be. Her and Jack. That's what she had to live for and visa versa.

Later that night they were laying in the hotel room. Jack was leaning back onto a stack of pillows on the bed and Emilie was laying next to him, plucking the strings on the guitar that was on his lap. She was exhausted. She cried on the way back to the hotel and the whole time they had been there.

"Can I play you something?" Jack asked softly. Emilie looked up at him and nodded.

"Yeah." she whispered back and moved so he could fix his guitar.

"I've been working on it for along time. I started it after you first got here and I've been adding to it slowly." he told her as he tuned the guitar. He looked over at her and smiled before he started singing and strumming the guitar.

_When you feel all alone  
And the world has turned its back on you  
Give me a moment please to tame your wild, wild heart  
I know you feel like the walls are closing in on you  
It's hard to find relief and people can be so cold_

_When darkness is upon your door and you feel like you can't take anymore_

_Let me be the one you call  
If you jump, I'll break your fall  
Lift you up and fly away with you into the night  
If you need to fall apart  
I can mend a broken heart  
If you need to crash, then crash and burn  
You're not alone_

_When you feel all alone  
And a loyal friend is hard to find  
You're caught in a one way street  
With the monsters in your head  
When hopes and dreams are far away and  
You feel like you can't face the day_

_Let me be the one you call  
If you jump I'll break your fall  
Lift you up and fly away with you into the night  
If you need to fall apart  
I can mend a broken heart  
If you need to crash, then crash and burn  
You're not alone_

_'Cause there has always been heartache and pain  
And when it's over you'll breathe again  
You'll breath again_

_When you feel all alone  
And the world has turned its back on you  
Give me a moment please  
To tame your wild, wild heart_

_Let me be the one you call  
If you jump, I'll break your fall  
Lift you up and fly away with you into the night  
If you need to fall apart  
I can mend a broken heart  
If you need to crash, then crash and burn  
You're not alone_

Jack slowly laid the guitar to the side and looked over at his girlfriend. He almost expected her to cry but when he looked over at her, she was smiling.

Never had she felt so loved than at that moment. All day she had only thought about the pain that the past two years had given her but not once had she thought about the joy it had brought her. The good and bad times she and Jack had gone through. Their first kiss, their first time making love. The first time he told her that he loved her and the way his smile brightened when she said it back. And they way she felt when she realized that they both meant it with every being in their body.

Jack smiled when she grabbed his face and kissed him gently. She pulled back from him and looked deep into his eyes.

"I love you." he whispered. "And I mean that with everything that I am, Emilie. No lies, no cover up. I love you. The love I have for you it's pure and it's honest. And it will never go away." Emilie smiled and moved to sit in his lap. He held her close as she snuggled into him.


	28. AUTHOR'S NOTE

**Okay so even though I have this planned out I'll admit I've neglected this but I have my reasons. I have loads of shockers coming up and a few really emotional scenes that I know all of you will love but I'm putting this on a temporary hiatus.**

**Why?**

**I am in deep with my new DS story, A Helter Skelter Romance and with another story I'm writing for CSI:NY. They are taking all of my time and thoughts and I don't want to write something half assed for this one. So I need an official break.**

**So I wanted to let you all know this. If I get the urge to write for this, I will but most likely I won't be posting on this for a while. At least until the high of the other two stories takes it toll. C&B is my baby and she has loads of more chapters and drama to come and she's been going strong for a while now. And frankly, she needs a break.**

**I can tell you that in the upcoming chapters when I do post...a new character is brought in and two old people are broght back, one's only for a chapter though. After that I will be skipping to a year ahead and that's where I'll pick up. So I hooe you all will continue to read this when I pick it up again.**

**Thanks, Britt a.k.a brttmclv**

**:)**


	29. New Years

**New Year's Day 4:57pm**

Jack was amazed at how quickly things change. He was shocked at how fast moods switch. One day you are happy and joyful, then the next you are crying your eyes out. Well, he wasn't crying his eyes out but his heart was breaking faster and more painful that ever on this day.

He couldn't keep his eyes off of her, which was dangerous seeing as he was driving and it was already dark. But he didn't want to look away. Her pale face, red nose, tear blotched face and puffy eyes were a huge contrast to the face and girl he had seen yesterday. In fact he could vividly remember the smile spreading across her face when she held up the bottle of whiskey in their hotel room.

***

_**New Year's Eve 8:27pm**_

"_It's New Year's." she grinned and set the bottle on the small table. Jack chuckled and looked at her._

"_Yeah and?" he asked, trying to sound indifferent. Emilie frowned at his response but recovered quickly with sly smile._

"_Do I need to remind you how to celebrate with a bottle of Jack D. on New Year's in a hotel all alone with moi?" she asked in an innocent voice and a wink at the end. Jack tapped his chin a few times and smirked._

"_Maybe." he whispered huskily. Emilie pulled the top off the bottle and grabbed two plastic cups from the counter in the hotel room. She walked over to the bed he was laying on and crawled up to straddle his lap._

"_Well, how about we get started?" she asked seductively and poured a shot sized amount of whiskey in each of the cups. She handed one to Jack and set the bottle down. _

"_Toast?" he asked looking up at her. She nodded her head and bit her lip as she thought of a proper toast._

"_Umkay." she smiled brightly and held her cup to his. "To a being alone for once and not having Angel around to freak out on us." Jack laughed out loud and tapped his cup to hers in agreement. Their eyes never left one another's as they tossed the liquid down their throats. Emilie winced a little and scrunched her face up._

"_Light weight." Jack teased when she made a soft gagging noise. Emilie looked at the bottle in disgust and looked down at her boyfriend._

"_How can you drink this shit? It's gross." she grumbled and set her cup down._

"_Blame Bobby." Jack told her." If I didn't drink it,"_

"_You weren't a man." Emilie finished for him and waved her hand dismissively. "Yeah, yeah. He's full of it, eh?"_

"_That he is, babe." Ja__c__k agreed and reached for the bottle. Emilie took it from him and before he could protest, she poured both of them another round. "Oh you're tough." he teased her. Emilie stuck her tongue out at him and set the bottle back down._

"_Your turn to toast." she told him and waited patiently as he thought of a toast. _

"_Here's to Bobby not breaking the hotel door down for dumb ass reasons." he declared and Emilie burst into laughter. He watched as she threw her head back and laughed, loving the way her eyes shined and her cheeks crinkled into tiny laugh lines and dimples. _

"_True, true." she finished laughing and they both took their drinks. She didn't have as much problems with the second as the first one. And through the night it got better and better._

"_Humm...here's to not having to hear Sofi and Angel bumping uglies all night!" Emilie yelled. They were on about their tenth toast, which meant tenth shot, and both were far beyond drunk. _

"_Oh thank God, yes!" Jack nodded and took his shot right after Emilie. She set her cup down next to the bottle and slowly laid her body down on top of Jack's. He, too, set his cup down and wrapped his arms around her. "You okay?" he asked softly and brushed the hair out of her face._

"_I'm good." she whispered back and turned her head so she could kiss his chest. Jack's eyes closed at the feel of her lips on his skin and sighed softly. A small smile crossed Emilie's face when she saw him relax and she placed another kiss next to where her last had been._

"_I love you, ya know?" Jack mumbled and ran a hand up and down her back, each time lifting her shirt up a little more._

"_I know." she breathed and slowly moved down his chest. He tensed a little when she got to his stomach and she smiled again. _

"_Shouldn't we have resolutions?" he asked breathlessly. Emilie stopped her attack on his hot skin and looked down at him, a confused look on her pretty face._

"_Yes, we should." she nodded. "But we don't have any yet, do we?" she asked and Jack shook his head._

"_Humm well, I know one resolution." Jack stated and Emilie moved to crawl next to him and under his arm. He chuckled and pulled her closer to him._

"_Tell me." she demanded playfully and laid her head on his shoulder._

"_My New Year's Resolution is to quit smoking." Jack declared and Emilie snorted. He looked down and glared at her._

"_That's a stupid resolution." she told him before he could ask._

"_How so?" he asked, a little offended._

"_You can't quit smoking." she told him, holding back a tiny smirk. Jack saw this and wondered what she was thinking._

"_Why is that?" he asked._

"_Because you look sexy." she announced to the empty room and started laughing. Jack shook his head and sat up on his elbows._

"_What's your resolution?" he asked. Emilie stopped short in her fit of hysterics and pondered that question._

"_I'm not sure." she whispered and looked up at him. "Let me get back to you on that." Jack nodded and laid back down on the bed._

"_I got another one." he told her and Emilie looked over. "My other resolution, if you won't let me quit smoking, is to make love to you every chance I can." he grinned. Emilie sat up quickly and looked over at the clock on the wall. Jack saw her frown and sat up again. "What?" he asked._

"_I was going to take you up on that resolution but it's not the New Year yet." she pouted. Jack grinned again and reached out for her hand, watching as the smile spread across her face. _

"_Let's call this a practice run for the New Year, okay?" he asked and Emilie answered him with a long, sweet kiss._

***

Jack only shook his head at the memory that was last night. She had been so happy. Drunk, but happy. It was like the day prior, when she went to see Abigail, was just something she had to deal with. It was the inevitable and she knew that she could drown in it or deal with it.

And she dealt with it.

All that day, as gloomy as it was, was perfect. They walked around Salem and Emilie showed him the home where Abigail had picked her up at. She showed him the house that her and Abigail lived in before they moved to Boston. She showed him her childhood, the good and the bad.

But the worse was saved for today, he thought as he continued to drive back to their hotel. He still couldn't take his eyes off of her. Her soft whimpering let him know that even though she was asleep, she still felt the effects of today.

He now wondered how long it would be until he got his Emilie back. The one that was happy. The one that he loved more than life itself.

The one he made love to last night.

***

_**New Year's Eve 10:02pm**_

"_Jack." His name came off of lips so easily. He loved the way it sounded coming from her. The way she closed her eyes and parted her lips just a little. It never ceased to amaze him. _

_Another soft gasp came from her lips as his own traveled down her neck and throat, savoring every inch of her soft skin. He smiled against her skin and moved his hands to her hips to peel the last of her clothing of. She rose from the bed to help him and rolled her head back when he nibbled the skin on the inside of her thigh. _

"_Jack, please." she breathed and ran her fingers through his hair, tugging it lightly to get her point across. But he only smirked up at her and moved a little higher. _

_She knew this was payback for her earlier teasing. At the time, it sounded like a good idea but now that karma was making it__s__ presence known, she wished she would have given him what he wanted when he was practically begging. _

"_You made your bed, Em." Jack whispered to her. "Now lay in it." He licked a __small__ spot on her thigh and blew lightly, smiling when she whined and writhed under him. _

_He loved this. Payback. But he couldn't hold it off much longer. Her earlier actions had him ready to go right there but he had to take control and make her pay. So he was licking and sucking everywhere __except the place she wanted it the most, just like she did him._

_He chuckled when she pushed her hips down and glared at him. He moved from his spot and slowly up the length of her body. When he was hovered over her once again, she quickly took his face in her tiny hands and kissed him deeply. A faint taste of whiskey was still present on both of their tongues and made them crave one another even more._

_Emilie moaned into his mouth and pushed herself up against him, trying to feel as much of him as she could. Jack responded to her request in another way and sealed their bodies together with one swift movement. Emilie's mouth moved from Jack's immediately and a loud moan filled the room. _

***

Jack remembered her moans from last night, as well as the feel of her skin and the feel of her surrounding him in the mist intimate way.

"Damnit." he groaned and moved to adjust himself in the seat. He sighed and reached down to grab his cigarettes. He knew Emilie would flip if he smoked in her car so he rolled the window down just enough to let the gray smoke drift out. There were only a few more miles until they got back to the hotel. He wondered if she would want to pack and leave tonight or if she would still stay after today.

It would be a toss up really. There's no telling if she would think she was strong enough to stay in this town one more minute or if she would just run. If the other day with Abigail would be any indicator, she would stay.

But today was not like that day.

***

_**Earlier New Year's Day 1:23pm**_

"_Are you ready?" Jack asked, looking over at Emilie in the passenger's seat. She stared out at the green pasture spotted with gray stones and looked at him with wide childlike eyes._

"_I think I am. I __mean__, I handled Abby's really well so I think this should go real smoothly. Right? It's not like it won't cry because I will but maybe I won't freak out completely. I don't think I ever really freaked out. Granted, I've had my hysterical crying fits but nothing that one would call abnorm-"_

"_Emilie!" Jack shouted. Emilie stopped mid rant and looked over at him, this time with sad eyes._

"_I don't know if I can do it." she whispered, tears already filling her bright eyes._

"_It'll be okay. Just like with Abby, I'm right here." he promised her and kissed her knuckles. She nodded once and they left the car slowly._

_Jack reached out and grabbed her hand as they slowly walked through the tiny cement path that winded around the cemetery. He didn't know where they were buried but he knew the area they were in. It was the direction that Emilie's eyes were glued to, the west side of the grounds near the trees. He felt her hand grip his tighter as they made their way to her parents__'__ grave._

_He glanced at her every once few steps to see how she held up. For the most part she looked calm but he could see that her body was shaking as they got closer. He saw the pain take over her eyes and fill them completely. He almost expected tears but they weren't there yet. _

"_Stop." she whispered suddenly and let his hand go. It was then that he realized how hard she was holding it. He looked down at it and her hand print was clearly visible in a white print around his hand. He rubbed both hands together to get the feeling back into his one._

_His eyes focused in on two marble gray headstones on front of them and the girl that was now sitting Indian style between them. _

"_I don't know what to say." he heard her whisper. "I've thought about this moment many, many times. I thought about what I would say and what I would do. Would I cry? Would I scream? I wasn't sure."_

_He watched as she warily held a hand out and went to touch one of the stone's but stopped short. He looked to his left and stepped over a few feet to sit on a bench next to an oak tree._

"_I'm still not too sure about what I should. Part of me feels like I should cry. Isn't that what you're supposed to do, cry? Cry whenever you think about a lost one? Cry when you come to this dreaded cemetery and see them? Let people know that you still feel the pain. That you still miss them." she whispered, her voicing cracking at the end but from where Jack stood, he saw no tears._

"_That's what I see on TV. It's what I see when I look around. People crying. Trying to show that they are hurt and mourning. Grieving." she chuckled a little. "Well, let me tell you this, if you don't already know. I've mourned a lot. I've grieved a lot. I've cried so many tears it__s__ unreal. I've had my heart broken more times that the people of the world can count._

"_Nothing has ever gone like I wanted it to. For the most part, it's gone the complete opposite. I didn't want you die. I didn't want to loose Richie. I didn't want to go with Abi at first and then in the end I didn't want to loose her either. Nothings ever gone the way I wanted. Never." she told them. "I didn't want Jack to leave me wither, but he did." _

_Jack cringed and bowed his head._

"_But he came back." she said with a smile. "And if I hadn't have lost everyone that I did and lost everything that I did, I wouldn't have him. I wouldn't even be alive if it weren't for him. He saved me in more ways than one. And I am so grateful to have him in my life. I really wish you two were here to meet him. You'd love him." she looked back at Jack. _

"_I know I do." she smiled. "He's always there for me. Even when he doesn't realize it, he's there." Jack smiled at her and took the change in mood as a sort of beckoning. He moved over to her slowly and sat down next to her. She smiled at him again and then turned back to the stones._

"_I miss you guys." she whispered and the tears filled her eyes finally. "I do miss you, so much more than anyone can imagine. And words cannot even begin to describe how hard it is to live without you. To not see your faces everyday or hear your voices. I'd give everything and anything to hear you yell at me for leaving my shoes in the middle of the floor again." she chuckled and Jack reached over to wipe the falling tears away. "I'd give anything to be a family again."_

"_I think now I know what to do." she continued and took a deep breath. "I'm proving the people on TV wrong and showing the people here that you don't have to cry." she whispered and looked over at Jack. "You don't have to __grieve__ forever; you don't have to cry hysterically._

"_You can smile. You can laugh. You can live." she nodded and Jack wrapped an arm around her. "I'll cry still but not for the reasons I have been. I'll cry because I'm happy or because I laughed too hard. I'll cry because one day, I know I will see you again," she paused and choked on a tiny sob. "And I won't hurt anymore. I won't feel the emptiness that I feel now and that I have lived with. I'll be whole again. Completely whole." Emilie looked over at Jack and sniffed a little._

"_I'm ready to go now." she whispered and took his hand. He stood up first and gently pulled her to her feet. He watched as she leaned over and placed a kiss to each headstone and then turned to him. "I'm okay." she promised. Jack nodded and held her hand as they walked back to the car._

***

He didn't expect her to do that good. Honestly, he expected her to go hysterical and force him to commit her. But she didn't. She cried a little. She laughed a little. But she healed a lot. She had her closure.

"Jack."

He looked over to the passenger seat and saw Emilie peeking out from under her hoodie at him.

"Hey babe." he whispered and reached out to move the hat off of her head. He smirked when her tangled hair feel free and she ran a hand through it. "Sleep good?" he asked and looked back to the road.

"It was okay." she whispered. Jack nodded once and dropped the conversation. Emilie knew he took her short and soft answers at as a sign that she didn't want to talk but that wasn't it.

She was thinking. She was thinking about earlier that day. She was thinking about last night. Thinking about the present and the future. Today had been an eye opener for her. Today made her realize how she has spent her life mourning and unhappy. In a sense she had pushed everything and anyone who tried to make her happy away from her. Granted, she let some people in but when things got tough she pushed them away again. She drowned herself in the fact that people she cared for were gone instead of living life.

She had let most of her life slip away. She had lived an unhappy life until now. And even then she still waited for the pain.

This wasn't a life to live. And she didn't want to live it anymore.

"Jack?" she called. He looked over at her again and she smiled at him. "Is it too late to make my New Year's resolution?" she asked. Jack smiled a little and shook his head.

"It's still New Year's. I'm sure it will count." he told her. "So what is it?"

"My New Year's resolution," she smiled and grabbed his hand. "is to be happy. Really and truly happy." Jack stared at her for a second before turning back to the road and squeezing your hand.

"That's a good resolution, babe." he told her. "I think we can make that work, don't you?" he asked and looked at her out the corner of his eye. She smiled brightly and picked his hand up to kiss it.

"No, I know we can make that work."


	30. Room 201

I tossed and turned.

Then I tossed some more and turned more than that.

My body was screaming for sleep but my mind just wouldn't agree with it anymore. I wanted to look over at the clock to see what time it was and how long I had slept but I didn't want to open my eyes. If I did I knew I wouldn't go back to sleep.

So I laid there squeezing my eyes shut, tossing and turning.

But nothing worked.

Then it hit me and I groaned out loud.

Bathroom time.

I was tempted to try and hold it but I knew that would only make things worse. Either I could get up and go now, risking staying awake for whatever was left of this day OR I could hold it and wake up with a very sore bladder and be forced to jump out of bed and go. And if there's one thing I hate more than getting up in the middle of the night, it's getting out of bed before I was fully awake.

So, after a few minutes of silent deliberation, I reluctantly pulled myself from the warm confines of Jack's body and the thick, fluffy comforter to make my trip to the bathroom. I caught a glance of the clock beside Jack and rolled my eyes.

"2:38am." I grumbled and walked into the bathroom, shutting the door softly. I quickly did my business and washed my hands. It was then that I noticed a slight throbbing in my forehead.

A crying ache.

The effect of crying so hard and scrunching up your forehead, it sucks. And now it was an added problem to my already problem filled and sleepless night. I turned the light off in the bathroom after I dried my hands and walked out into the room again. Instead of going over to the bed I walked over to the dresser and grabbed my purse. I pulled out a bottle of Tylenol and shook out three red and white pills.

"Maybe this will help." I mumbled and grabbed a bottle of water from the tiny fridge to swallow them with. I sighed, my eyes closed, as the pills made their way down. I was feeling a little tired but doubted that it would be there when I finally got back into bed. I set the bottle down and looked down at the clock.

"2:45am." I whispered and looked up at the big wall mirror in front of me.

It was then that I nearly died.

My eyes were wide with shock as I stared at the person behind me. Their small lips were turned up into the smile that I grew so fond of. Theirs hands were clasped in front of them and their white hair wa pulled up on her head. Nothing has changed. They looked exactly the same since the last time that I had seen them...well, not the exact last time.

That time was one that I blocked from my mind.

"Evelyn." I whispered. My hands started to shake and her smile got bigger. I gripped the dresser, wanting to badly to turn around and hug her but I was too afraid.

What was going on with me? Am I crazy?

I closed my eyes and counted to five...then opened them again.

I was greeted with her smile again.

Oh, this made me weak.

It was almost slow motion as she slowly extended her right hand to me. I stared at it through the mirror and watched her frial old fingers slowly open up. Without any hesitation, I turned around and gently grabbed the tiny piece of paper that laid in her hands. I stared at it in mine and then looked back up to ask her something but...My eyes frantically searched the room and then I turned back to the mirror.

She was gone.

I looked down at my hand and slowly unfolded the paper.

11424 Majuro Dr.

Salem, Mass.

* * *

I shot straight up in bed and gasped for air. I felt a slight chill in the room and looked around. My eyes squeezed shut when I realized it was a dream.

"Just a dream." I whispered and opened my eyes to look at the clock.

2:45am. I groaned and rubbed my face with my hands as I laid back down. It was so real. I swear it was like she was there and I could still feel the paper in my hands.

I looked down at Jack's sleeping form and smiled. His arm was still draped across my waist and he had one of my legs twisted between his. He looked so cute and peaceful.

"Jack." I whispered and reached over to run my fingers through his hair. "Jackie, wake up." I smiled when he stirred a little but didn't wake up. "Come on. Wake up, Jack." I said a little louder and laughed when he moved closer to me and buried his face in my neck.

"Uhm." he moaned.

"Wakey, wakey." I sang and I saw one eye open.

"What's wrong?" he grumbled sleepily.

"I just need to talk to you real quick." I told him and sat up a little. He didn't budge.

"Talk." he mumbled and wrapped his arms around me tighter.

"Do you remember the address that the lawyer gave me?" I asked softly. Now I had his attention. His head popped up and he stared at me curiously.

"Yeah, why?" he asked. I kept running my fingers in his hair and sighed.

"I wanna go." I whispered. His brows raised and I smiled a little.

"Really?" he asked. I nodded once and he rubbed his chin. "Okay, we can go tomorrow...er uh," he paused and looked at the clock and groaned. "I mean, later today."

"I just wanna drive by though. See if I recognize it." I added and he nodded. "But we'll have to call Bobby to look for it. I don't remember the address exactly." I saw his face fall immediately and this time it was me who raised my brows. "What?"

"I kinda..uh." he sighed and squeezed his eyes shut. "I have the address, Em." he confessed. I stared at him shocked.

"Excuse me?" I asked needing to hear it one more time...or about a million.

"I brought the address with me." he repeated and looked at him sheepishly. Suddenly, I was mad.

"What? Were you going to force me to go? Trick me, huh?" I yelled and threw the covers off of my body but before I could crawl out of bed, Jack had his arms wrapped around me again.

"No, listen." he whispered and me to his chest. He kissed the back of my neck and rested his chin on my shoulder. "It was strictly a just in case decision. I wanted to have it in case you decided you wanted to go see it. Okay? I would never force you or trick you into doing something you didn't want to do, Emilie. I should be offended that you even let that cross your mind." he whispered and I relaxed, feeling guilty now.

"I know. I'm sorry." I whispered and moved to snuggle up next to him.

"Let's just go back to sleep. We'll deal with this later." he yawned and pulled me onto his chest. I kissed his jaw and smiled up at him.

"I love you." He looked down at me and kissed the tip of my nose.

"And I love you, Diddle."

* * *

I was all nerves later that morning. I literally fell out of bed when Jack woke me up. I hit my toe on the door as I walked into the bathroom. I burnt my head with my hair straightener. I poked my eye with my mascara brush and my eyeliner pencil. And I ended up getting up locked out of the hotel room. I was a mess, a total mess.

I had to give it to Jack though, he was handling this well. He, for the most part, contained his laughter when I hurt my toe and burnt myself but by the time I nearly poked my eye out, he was starting to worry. Then when he realized I locked the car keys and hotel keys in the hotel room, he managed to shut up and just walk away. I thought he ran off but luckily, he came back...with a very amused house keeper and an extra key.

He almost forced me into the passenger seat and we were off. I tapped my fingers against the window, my leg, the dashboard and his leg the whole time we were in the car. I was a little happy when he stopped at a gas station to get directions. On one hand I was able to get out of the now freakishly small car and breath but on the other hand, we were getting closer the address.

"I don't know why I'm doing this." I muttered of the millionth time that morning. Jack sighed audibly and squeezed his eyes shut for a second. I knew I was driving him insane and as much as I wanted to stop, I just couldn't. I was going insane myself and I needed company.

"Because you know you have to." he told me calmly. I looked over at him with narrowed eyes.

"I don't have to do shit." I spat and I saw him roll his eyes. About time his good demeanor waned.

"Okay." he agreed and looked over at me with a smirk. "Because you know you want to." I glared at him and rolled my eyes this time.

"Whatever." I grumbled and looked out the window. Childish, yes but I had no control over what I was doing or saying.

"Listen, Em. I'm know you're scared." he started softly but I quickly cut him off.

"I am not." I argued and he bit back a groan.

"Fine." he mumbled through pursed lips and thought for a minute. "You're apprehensive. Better?" he asked sardonically.

"I guess." I hissed and gave him a sarcastic smile. He looked away with a long sigh and I sighed too. I was treating him like crap.

"You don't know what this address is going to hold. You don't know what is going to happen so you can't plan how to handle it. But Ma would never send us somewhere that would hurt us. You know that." he told me. I bit my lip when he reached over and grabbed my hand. I'm an ass to him and he doesn't even have the decency to be one back. Why do I deserve him again?

"I know." I relented and squeezed his hand.

"She left this for you for a reason. Now we're going to see what's there. You owe her this." he reminded me and slowly brought my hand to his lips. I smiled and rubbed his hand with my thumb.

"I know." I nodded and looked back out the window. He had a point. Evelyn would never try and send me somewhere that would hurt or scare me. She knew how much I had been through and it was selfish of me to think she would try and hurt me more. "I'm scared, Jack." whispered after a few minutes.

"I know." Jack nodded and squeezed my hand. "But I'm right here." he promised and kissed my hand again. I sighed feeling a little more calm and looked out the window.

"How far?" I asked. I looked around out the window but didn't recognize anything. It was more of a small side town on the outskirts of Salem than Salem itself. Jack let my hand go and grabbed the paper that held the directions.

"The road should be up here soon." he spoke after a minute. I nodded and went to reach for the radio but stopped.

"Are you okay?" I asked Jack. He looked over at me with an almost pained expression and nodded weakly. I watched again as he shifted in his seat. "You sure?" I asked again. He groaned loudly and gripped the steering wheel.

"I gotta piss." he announced and I rolled my eyes.

"Oh nice Jack." I muttered at his lovely choice of words.

"What?" he asked sensing my sarcasm. "Would you rather me say urinate?" he asked and I looked over at him.

"No, but the cave man bathroom response could be avoided." I told him in all honesty. He huffed and I smirked when he kept shifting.

"What? I do. Really badly too." he whined. I shook my head and frowned when he stopped moving and grabbed the paper again. He set it down slowly and pointed to my side of the street. "There it is."

I looked over at the house he pointed out and realized it was bigger than a normal house. On the front lawn was a white and beige sign that read Salem Care Center. I looked at the oddly long house as Jack stopped by the sidewalk. It looked like a little old lady's house. It had flower pots scattered everywhere from the front porch to the window sills. The shutters were a bright white and the house itself was a pale yellow color. I then noticed the people that were walking around in the yard and front porch.

They were old people. It was a nursing home.

"Recognize it?" Jack asked in a strained voice. I shook my head and looked back at him.

"Nope." I answered and looked back to the sign. "The date under the sign says it was built 6 months ago. That must be why it didn't show up as a nursing home in the system."

"Huh?" Jack asked. I sighed, forgetting that I didn't get to tell him this detail.

"I went to the station before all that crap went down and the system said it as just a house. It's so new that they haven't updated the system's yet." I explained as quickly as I could. I really didn't want to get into the whole story. It was still a little sore in my mind.

"Oh." he mumbled and looked at the nursing home. "Em, I really gotta go." he whined after a few seconds. I laughed and pointed to the house.

"Go inside then." I told him. "I'm sure they have loads of bathrooms." I chuckled and he stared at me in horror.

"I don't wanna go by myself." he almost yelled.

"Why not?" I asked, confused by the tone of his voice and look on his face.

"Old people scare me." he grumbled and scratched his head. Oh, he's too cute.

"Seriously?" I asked, trying not to laugh.

"Dead serious. They are either way too nice or just creepy." he nodded seriously. "Please come in with me." he begged and poked out his bottom lip in the cutest pout I had ever seen. I couldn't help but laugh and he grinned. He knew he had won.

"Fine. But you better be quick." I warned him and got out the car slowly.

"Yes'm." he saluted . He was so corny sometimes.

* * *

It was a nice nursing home. Everything was clean and old people proof, of course. The walls were a pale blue and had clouds on them. I think i could do without the clouds though. It kind of made it look like heaven. Creepy much?

I looked around the lobby for a bathroom and nudged Jack when I found one.

"Over there. Hurry." I told him and just as he let my hand go the lady at the front desk called out to us.

"Sign in please." she smiled. I smiled back and pointed to Jack as he walked into the men's room.

"Oh, he just needs to use the restroom." I told her and turned around.

"All visitors must sign in." she called, her voice a tad more forceful than I had been in her last and identical statement. I rolled my eyes and turned back around. I mustered a smiled and waved my hand to the door, once again.

"Really, we're just passing through." I told her. Her face fell from poilte to down right rude in a flash. She threw the pen and clip board on the desk and riased a brow.

"Sign in, please." she ordered and sat back in her chair. I popped one hip out and raised a brow at her. Why the need to be so damn rude? Jack needed to use the restroom, I highly doubt that constitutes the need to call us vistitors and be rude.

We glared at each other for what seemed like forever and finally I sighed and stomped over to her desk.

"Oh my god, fine." I growled and picked the pen up, signing my name without looking up at her. When I was done, I slammed the pen down on her desk and smiled. "Here. Happy?"

"Thank you." she frowned and she grabbed the clipboard. I rolled my eyes and turned around to see Jack walking out of the restroom.

"Jack, let's go." I yelled suddenly, He turned his head to me and frowned when he saw my face. "Let's just go." I growled and grabbed his hand. I could see the car through the doors and wanted to run through the doors but right as I reached for the handle...

"Wait!" the lady at the front desk yelled. I swung my whoel body around angrily to glare at her.

"What now?" I hissed but my angry faltered when I saw the face contorted with surprise and another lady standing next to her, looking down at the clipdboard.

"You're Emilie Ravin?" the other lady asked looking up at me, a small smile graced her lips.

"Yes." I nodded and I felt Jack rub my hand.

"It's her." the rude lady gasped and covered her mouth. I looked over at Jack who looke just as confused as I was. I saw the new lady walk around the desk and smile at us.

"Well, we've been waiting for you Emilie." she told me softly. I heard Jack huff and I just stared at her.

"Excuse me?" I asked, not quite sure i was hearing her well. She has been waiting for me? How? I haven't been near Massachsetts in years.

"We didn't think you'd come." she smiled again and I shook my head politley.

"I think you must be confused." I told them and tugged Jack's hand to turn around. I wanted to leave.

"No, not confused. Surprised, yes." the rude desk lady laughed.

"Why surprised?" I asked. Confusion was still there but the curiosity was more promenent.

"Well, when Mrs. Mercer came by-" the second lady started but Jack cut her off.

"My mother was here?" he asked. I stared at them and looked up at Jack, who was plale white.

"Evelyn Mercer. Yes." she nodded and Jack looked down at the ground. I squeezed his hand and looked over at them.

"When did she come here?" I asked quietly.

"Oh about 4 months back. She called first and came that very weekend." she answered and looked over at the desk lady for comfirmation. She nodded.

"Why?" Jack asked. I was surprised they heard him.

"Well, she was looking for someone. Apparently, she'd been looking for a while and she was so happy to finally find them, she came down to see for herself. She said you would come here but I didn't think she was being real." They both smiled now, looking at us like we were some kind of magical appearance.

"Who did she see?" I asked at the same time that Jack spoke.

"What's going on?" he asked. We looked at each other and the desk lady smiled at us and she walked back to her desk.

"I think you should see for yourself and talk to them." she told us and picked up a key and handed it to us. "It's room 201."


	31. Bless The Broken Road

**Just an FYI there will only be a few more chapter before I break for a sequel. I'm not sure what it will be called but I'll let you know in one of the last chapters. :)**

* * *

I didn't know what to think. It was like a total overload. All I wanted to do was drive by and see what the address held. Then Jack had to use the bathroom so all we wanted to do was use the restroom. Then they make me sign in and then they call me back and tell me that they have been waiting for me.

What the hell?

On top of all of that, they send me back to a room and tell me to go find out why Evelyn had been here.

I was far passed confused but so curious as I walked to Room 201.

"Em?" Jack whispered as we walked down the hall. I knew that tone in his voice. He was worried about me. He didn't even have to ask me if I was okay. I looked over at him and smiled.

"I'm okay." I whispered back. I wasn't entirely sure if I was though. This was completely unexpected and I'm not good with the unexpected. I need time to prepare and deal with things that are going to happen to me. Of course, like is always throwing unexpected things to people and that's why me and my life don't get along half of the time.

It was a few more steps until we reached the door and we both stopped.

"Jack?" I looked up at him and he grabbed my hand. He knew what I wanted.

"I'm here." he promised. I told you he knew what I wanted. I wanted to make sure he was with me. I couldn't do this on my own. I'll admit it, I was scared.

I took a deep breath before slowly pushing the door open.

The room was tiny and white. I could see the small television and dresser when I walked in but the bed that held my mystery person was hidden behind a pale pink curtain. I looked around the room more closely and noticed that there weren't any flowers. There was no pictures, balloon or gifts that I could see. It was like no one visited this person.

And that actually made me kind of sad.

The thought of being in a nursing home and not having people to come see you, it was sad. Lonely. I'd hate to be alone like this.

I squeezed Jack's hand as we got closer to the curtain and right before I reached it, he stopped. I looked at him and he nodded for me to go on. He wanted me to do this part by myself. He couldn't hold my hand all the time. I was a grown woman, I needed to face things alone sometimes.

I slowly reached the edge of the curtain and pulled it to the side. From the feet and finally to the head, the person was finally revealed and I was shocked.

All these months of holding this address, all the dreams and the mystery...it was all revealed in this moment. It was this person. This was who Evelyn tracked down. This is who she wanted me to see.

But why?

Tears threatened my eyes now.

Now I understood why she left it at the lawyer's office. I wasn't ready. I would never be ready. This is why it was a secret. She knew I wouldn't come here on my own. If I had it my way, I'd live the rest of my life without seeing this person again.

"Em?" Jack whispered, apparently he saw the tears spill over and run down my cheeks. I was not sad, I was not upset. I was beyond mad and pissed off.

I was fucking livid just at the site of this person.

This woman. This evil woman.

She ruined everything for me. She kicked me and stepped on me like I meant nothing. Like I didn't spend most of my life with her and her family. She easily let me go and smiled as she left my life and took the only family I had left.

My Aunt.

"Em?" Jack asked again and I turned around. He winced when he saw the anger etched into my face and he nodded.

"We're leaving." I seethed but before I could get my foot moving, a rough voice spoke up.

"Please. Don't go yet." it said. I turned around and glared at her.

"Why?" I asked. I wanted to feel bad for her and the look of pain and hurt on her face but I couldn't do it. Was it selfish and cruel that I wanted her to feel some of the pain I felt over these years?

"Just stay." she asked and pointed to the couch beside her bed. Jack's hand went to my shoulder and slowly pushed me to the chair. We sat down quietly and I looked back to her.

"What do you want?" I asked. I watched as she slowly pulled the plastic nose tube from her face and laid it on her chest.

It was now that I noticed how sickly and frail she looked. I couldn't see her body but I was bones jutting out from under the blankets. Her eyes were sunken in and she was paler than ever.

"I want to talk." she croaked and I sat back, crossing my arms.

"Then do it before your breath runs out." I hissed and felt a sharp pinch in my ribs. I didn't bother to look over at Jack to see the shock on his face.

"No, I deserve it." she spoke up and Jack sat back. "I deserve every bit of it. After all the pain and hurt I caused her, I deserve far worse than some bad words."

"Well, I'd induce bodily harm but it seems life took that from me." I smirked and she nodded.

"It did. Lung cancer." she told me and I pursed my lips together. "Caught up to me real quick."

"Don't care." I declared and got another pinch from Jack. I could see the shocks till on his face but didn't care. This woman cause me hell. She deserved hers now.

"Did Evelyn tell you about this?" she asked.

"Evelyn died before she could give me the address and explain. I got it from her lawyer." I told her quickly. I didn't want to talk about Evelyn now. It was bad enough that I saw Jack flinch when he heard her name.

"I'm sorry to hear about that." she whispered and looked at me. "Did you come here to find out what it was?"

"No. I wanted Jack to see my old home and I wanted to see my parents." I said and she nodded again.

"I'm sorry." she apologized.

"For what?" I asked. "There are far too many things for you to be sorry for, so you might want to explain."

"For taking Richie from you. For letting you go. For splitting you up." she rattled off. "For everything."

"Why?" I asked, feeling the tears again. The images of my brother and our last day together flooded my mind and nearly killed me all over again.

"Why what?" she asked.

"Why are you sorry now? It's a little too late, don't ya think?" I nearly yelled but calmed down when Jack wrapped an arm around my shoulders.

"This isn't a recent thing, Emilie. I've been wanting to see you for years now. It really hit hard when I found out about the cancer." she told me.

"Just spit it out already. I'm tired of getting bits and pieces of information from you." I said and felt Jack's hand rub my back. A weak smile formed on her face and she nodded.

"When Richie was 17, he moved out. You'd be happy about this part, he hated me. He absolutely hated me. He hated me for who I was and what I did to you two. He missed you every second of each day that you were gone. He screamed and yelled and hit me for days. So when he was able to emancipate himself, he did. He moved out and I didn't see him until 7 months ago when I was diagnosed with the cancer. The doctors called him to see if he'd let me live with him. He said no so I was sent to a nursing home. I was moved to this one when it opened. He's the only family I have left and eh won't come and see me. All because of you. Because I took him away." she explained. By the time she finished this I was hunched over in Jack's arms crying.

My brother loved me. He missed me. He hated her for separating us. He felt what I felt. This was all so much to take in.

"I underestimated the bond you two had. I underestimated the bond you had with your mother and father. You weren't blood related, you were closer than that. And when you and Richie needed each other the most," her voice cracked. "I took that away from you and him both. And for that Emilie, I am eternally sorry. I realized my mistake far too late but that does not mean that I don't regret it. Each day I spend in here alone, it makes me regret my decision more and more. This is my punishment though and I understand that." she finished.

* * *

JPOV

I couldn't look at her Aunt. She looked so frail and sickly. Her face was shallow and her skin was pale. She looked like death, literally. She had tubes hooked up to her from each side of her bed and numerous beeps and buzzers were going off.

I doubted that this was bothering her or Emilie though. Her Aunt was used to the sound by now and Emilie was too out of ir to care. The look on her face was calm the whole time, except a few tears that fell, but I could tell she was angry. She was shaking. Her tiny fists were quivering and her legs were too. She was ruthless too. I knew Emilie hated her for doing what she did but never did I expect her to be as verbally cruel as she was. I had never heard Emilie talk that way before. Though I was sure she wasn't saying nice things about me when I was gone.

I was quiet the whole time we were in the room but the only time Emilie was quiet was when her Aunt was telling her what was going on. I didn't have anything to say but if I did, I wouldn't be able to say it. I was speechless.

Richie Ravin had abandoned her because she abandoned Emilie. He didn't want anything to do with her and even though I felt bad for her, she deserved it.

Now I was just waiting for Emilie to speak. I could see her face twisted with something but I wasn't sure exactly what it was. Confusion? No. Looked more like she was thinking really hard but didn't want to have to think about it.

"I forgive you." she blurted out. My eyes widened and I swear her Aunt's heart monitor stopped for a second.

"What?" I asked, shocked still. Emilie grabbed my hand and nodded.

"I forgive her." she repeated.

"Why?" her Aunt croaked. Emilie smiled a little and shook her head.

"I don't owe you that much. Just know that you aren't worth my worries anymore." she told her honestly and she nodded. I watched her stand up and followed suit. "I'm not sure what Evelyn wanted me to do here but I don't think there is anything else to say or do. So we're going to be heading out now."

I took her hand and lead her to the door but the croaking came back.

"Wait." We turned around and I saw that her Aunt was pointing to a notepad next to her bed. I dropped Emilie's hand and walked over to pick it up. She smiled a little when I handed it to her and then a pen. "I was just one stop that she wanted you to go by." she spoke as she write. She ripped off the paper and handed it to me. "Go here."

"What's here?" I asked but she just smiled.

"Just go." she repeated and Emilie grabbed my hand. "Goodbye Emilie." I felt my hand being tugged and without another word we were gone.

We left silently. No one tried to stop us or talk to us and even if they did, Emilie wouldn't have stopped. I was very surprised when she by passed the passengers side door and crawled into the driver's seat.

"Let me see it." she demanded softly. I handed her the piece of paper and she read it.

"Do you know where it is?" I asked.

"Yeah." she answered and handed it back. I waited for more of an explanation but got none. We rode about 15 minutes in complete and utter silence. Not eve the radio was on. I was starting to get a little uncomfortable and turned to look at her.

She was crying.

"Em, babe?" I asked and reached over for her hand.

_I set out on a narrow way many years ago_

_Hoping I would find true love along the broken road_

_But I got lost a time or two_

_Wiped my brow and kept pushing through_

_I couldn't see how every sign pointed straight to you_

A soft sob escaped her lips and she pulled over to the side of the road. I jumped out of the car and reached in to pull her through the front seats and out to me. Her feet touched the ground and she was in my arms, holing me just as tight as I was holding her.

"Diddle." I whispered and she sobbed again.

"I forgive her." she cried and buried her face in my chest.

_Every long lost dream led me to where you are_

_Others who broke my heart they were like Northern stars_

_Pointing me on my way into your loving arms_

_This much I know is true_

_That God blessed the broken road_

_That led me straight to you_

"Why?" I asked. She was silent for a minute and then she looked up at me with a huge smile. It was teary but ti was hers.

"You don't get it do you?" she asked and I shook my head. "I can't hold it against her. I can't blame her for leaving me and wish that she could take it back. I don't want to change it or want her to want to take it back."

"But why?" I asked, still not understanding. "She hurt you and put you through hell. If she hadn't left you, you'd be with your brother right now."

_I think about the years I spent just passing through_

_I'd like to have the time I lost and give it back to you_

_But you just smile and take my hand_

_You've been there you understand_

_It's all part of a grander plan that is coming true_

"Yeah but not you." she added and I gaped at her. "I wouldn't have met Abigail or you. I would have missed out on all the good times me and Abi had and I would have missed out on you. Jack, to think of a life without you and Abi in it, it's just not a life. Her leaving me was the best thing that she could have done because I met you and you helped me see who I really was. You let me know that there was still life out there and that, though it ay be tough, it's worth living and loving."

"Em, I-I just."

"You don't have to say anything." she smiled and tapped my nose.

"But what about your brother?" I asked.

"I knew I'd see him again one day and I know I still will. I love and miss him and now I know that he misses and loves me too. We have a bond, Jack. It's not blood and no words can describe it but its there. I lost him so I could find you and I'm okay with that. Life handed me a bunch of bad turns, yes. But only so they could lead me to my path. The path where I met you."

_Every long lost dream led me to where you are_

_Others who broke my heart they were like Northern stars_

_Pointing me on my way into your loving arms_

_This much I know is true_

_That God blessed the broken road_

_That led me straight to you_

I was speechless. For once I had nothing to say. I almost couldn't move.

"I love you, Jack." she whispered. She moved up to the tip of her toes and placed a gentle kiss on my lips.

But it wasn't enough.

I pulled her back to me as soon as she pulled away and kissed her back. I kissed her with every ounce of love and passion that I was feeling in that moment. The feelings that she made me feel. My hands tangled themselves in her hair and she wrapped her arms around my neck.

"God, I love you too." I breathed when I let her go. She smiled at me and wiped the tears that were now falling from my eyes.

_Now I'm just rolling home_

_Into my lover's arms_

_This much I know is true_

_That God blessed the broken road_

_That led me straight to you_

_That God blessed the broken road_

_That led me straight to you._

"That was the house we were going to move into." she said and I was confused again. She giggled and I smirked. "The address she gave you. I heard that she and Richie moved into it after I was taken away but it was going to be our new home."

"What do you think is there?" I asked, still holding her to me.

"I don't know but we're about to find out."

* * *

Bless The Broken Road by Rascal Flatts


	32. Jan 4th

Emilie didn't know it but today, January 4th, would be one of the best days of her life.

They drove in silence to the neighborhood where Emilie and her parents were going to live before their untimely death. She only remembered the address because it was Ravine Dr and she thought it was funny that it was so close to their last names, Ravin. She didn't remember the house but was sure she would when she saw it again. It was like the 'I know their face but not their name' kind of thing.

Jack was antsy. This whole had thrown him for a loop with seeing Emilie's aunt and hearing Emilie talk like that to her. He was shocked and then like that she forgave her and they left. He was confused then. And then when he asked her explanation had been about him. That was when he complete and utter love and adoration came out in him. If he didn't love Emilie Ravin before today, he certainly did now.

Now they were headed to a house that Emilie had maybe seen once in her lifetime and neither knew why they were going there or what would be there. He would be really happy when he could curl up in bed and make love to Emilie like he had been wanting to do since they were on the side of the road.

Another thing looming on the horizon was a simple call. Both hadn't checked their messages for almost 4 days and they knew their inbox would be full. He didn't feel bad for ignoring them but Emilie was torn. She didn't want to keep Angel and Paisley out of the loop. Hell, for all they knew Jack and Em were dead or kidnapped. But Jack had a feeling Paisley or someone would be getting a phone call or text later this afternoon.

"Why do you think she gave us this address?" Jack asked as Emilie drove. Her tiny shoulders moved up and then back down.

"Not sure, Jackie. Maybe there is some stuff of my parents that's there. I don't know." she sighed and turned left into a nice sub-division. Jack looked around at the huge houses and frowned.

"You had a nice childhood with them didn't you?" he asked and kept looking at the houses as they passed by. Emilie saw the look on his face and frowned with him.

"I know what you're thinking and you need to quit." she demanded and he turned to look at her. "We had money, yes. Abi had money, yes."

"And now you don't. For so long you lived at our house, which is now all shot up." he sighed and Emilie reached over to squeeze his hand. "It's like you downgraded."

"I did no such thing. I have my own apartment and it's nice." she defended. "Plus, I don't think a life with you is a down grade, Jack. I don't need all the money in the world or a big house. I need you and that's it."

"But would you like a big, nice house and money to spare?" he asked and she smiled.

"Who doesn't? But I don't need money to make me happy. Hell, I bet half of these families that live out here are unhappy. They use their money and flashy things to distract people from looking at what's really there behind those fake ass smiles." she told him and he chuckled.

"Oh, I love you." he grinned and she patted his thigh.

"I love you too but don't ever think like that Jack." she pleaded and he nodded.

"I promise." he said. "I also promise that one day we'll have one of these big houses and money to spare and ya know what?" he asked with a smile.

"What?" she giggled.

"We'll be happy unlike these people. We'll show them what real love is." he vowed and leaned over to kiss her quickly.

"I'll hold you to that." she smiled and slowed down to make a turn onto Ravine Dr. Jack felt the tension as they slowly drove down the street. Emilie was looking for the house and Jack was looking for the house number. She spotted a dark red bricked house and pulled parked by the sidewalk. "Is this it?" she asked Jack without looking from the house. He check the mailbox number with the one her Aunt gave him and nodded.

"Yeah. I guess you remember it?" he asked and she nodded slowly.

"Only a little though." she whispered and finally looked over at him. "No car."

"Might be in the garage?" he suggested and she pursed her lips. "Wanna go knock?" he asked and she nodded. They got out of the car and Jack walked over to Emilie on the sidewalk.

"What do I say? What if I don't know them?" she asked, getting nervous again. Jack chuckled and rubbed her shoulders.

"It's okay. We'll ask them if they know your aunt." he told her and she relaxed. Emilie took a deep breath before walking froward to the house. Her foot barely touched the grass when a she heard a dog's bark. She had just enough time to realize that it was a dog before it crashed into her legs and sent her crashing down to the ground. Jack was cursing the dog and rushed to kneel down next to Emilie.

"So sorry!" a girl yelled and ran past them to catch the dog.

"Babe, you okay?" Jack asked and Emilie groaned, putting a hand to her head and looking at her elbow.

"Owwie." she whimpered and held her elbow to him. There was a hole in her long sleeved shirt and he could see the blood seeping through it.

"I am so sorry. He just took off. He never does that. Is she okay?" a man asked from behind Jack. Emilie's head was in Jack's lap and couldn't see the guy so Jack looked up and shook his head.

"She's bleeding and-" he paused. The man standing above him looked familiar. Not the familiar because you've met this but the familiar that you've seen them before. He had short dirty blonde hair and blue eyes.

Then is hit him.

"And what?" the guy asked and Jack looked down at Emilie. She still had her eyes squeezed shut and was saying ouch over and over again. Jack nudge her a little and started to push her up.

"Wait, no. Don't push her up. She might have a concussion." the guy stopped him and Jack's heart beat faster as he walked around to see Emilie better. He pulled a pen out of his pocket and kneeled down to her.

"Can you look up at me miss?" he asked and Jack nearly died when he saw Emilie pick her head up and look at the blond guy.

In that one look the world stopped for a split second. There was no sound except the deafening silence. There was no movement except for the shard in take of breath from two people.

"Emilie?" the guy croaked, tears filling his eyes and the pen dropped form his hand. Emilie's hand dropped from her head and to her heart, where it was beating faster than ever.

"Richie?" she whispered and her tears fell freely when he nodded his head. Jack let his arms drop to his sides and in an instant Emilie flung herself into her brothers arms. Jack couldn't fight the mist in his eyes and he sat back on his behind and watched as they hugged one another and cried.

Jack felt something cold on the back of his neck and turned to see the dog that had knocked Emilie over and the girl. She was staring at Richie and Emilie oddly and then looked down at him.

"Umm what did I miss?" she asked and he grinned up at her.

"That's Emilie." Jack said and she slapped her hand over her mouth. He saw the tears springing to her eyes.

"Oh my lord, are you serious?" she asked and sat down next to him.

"Yeah. I'm Jack, Em's boyfriend." he introduced and held his hand out. She took it smiling.

"I'm Kris. I'm Richie's fiancée." she smiled and the both looked back over at Emilie and Richie.

Emilie couldn't piece together a complete thought in her head. She had so much she wanted to say to the guy she was wrapped up in but every time she thought about pulling back and talking to him, she cried more. She didn't want to let him go. And Richie wasn't planning on letting go either.

After a few minutes they reluctantly pulled apart but Richie held her at arms length. She looked almost the same but grown up. Her hair was dyed brown but everything was still his little sister. Her blue eyes, her tiny nose and rosy cheeks. He hugged her again and she giggled the same laugh she always had.

"God, I missed you." she cried and buried her face in his jacket. She knew it was him that she was looking at. His voice was deeper and matured but he looked like he always did. Actually, he looked like their father without the grey hairs he had before he passed.

"I missed you too, Em. God, I missed you so much!" he cried and smoother her hair down. He looked over her shoulder to see Kris and a messy haired guy sitting on the ground grinning like fools. "Who's he?" he asked and Emilie burst out laughing.

"We've been back together for a whole 5 minutes and you're pulling the big brother card?" she asked and turned to see Jack's wide eyes.

"Hey, I'm the big brother so I get to use it whenever." Richie protested and Emilie laughed.

"Well, how about you do it later. It seems your mutt has already bloodied your sister." Kris smiled and got to her feet. Jack did the same and went over to help Emilie stand up. Richie's hand shot out into Jack's chest and Jacks topped. Emilie giggled as Richie help her to her feet and brushed past Jack without another glance.

"He's just trying to show off." Kris assured him and Jack sighed.

* * *

I couldn't take my eyes off of her. She was gorgeous. She always was. She was always one to turns heads even when she was younger. She would walk in the school and people would gush over how cute she was. Hell, I showed her off to my class as my show and tell project when I was in 1st grade. I thought she was perfect for the project. The teacher asked us to bring in something that we loved and cherished that week...so I brought Emilie.

I always wondered if she was still the head turner over these years. I wondered what she was like in high school and if she was popular or not. I wondered about every detail about her. How long her hair was, how tall she had gotten. For years and even to today while I was walking to dog, I thought about her and if I'd ever see her again.

"So Em, how long have you know Jack?" I asked as I cleaned the scratch on her arm. Bandit did a number on her.

"Almost two years." she smiled and looked over at Jack. He was a tall guy, that's for sure. He had the most unruly hair I'd ever seen though. He also had one hell of a deep voice. I guess chicks dug that.

"How old is Jack?" I asked and Kris glared at me.

"He's right here, ya know?" she scolded and I nodded my head.

"I know." I answered and looked at Jack. "So, Jack, how old are you?"

"I'll be 24 in March." he answered and I raised a brow.

"Em, you're what 19?" I asked and she glared at me.

"I'll be 20 a few months after him." she said and I huffed.

"That's one hell of an age difference. When did you get together?" I asked and they looked at one another.

"Officially only since November but it was a long time coming." Emilie spoke first and Jack nodded. I looked at my little sister and she smiled. "Jack helped me a lot when Abigail died. Him, his brothers and his mom were my saviors when I needed them the most." she explained and I put a band aide on her elbow.

"Would you two stay for dinner?" Kris asked, standing up.

"Sure." Jack nodded.

"Well, I need a few things from the store." Kris paused and Jack stood up, obviously taking her hint.

"I'll help." he offered and he walked over to kiss Emilie on the forehead. "I'll be back soon. Don't talk trash." he warned and Emilie smiled. I waited for them to leave before talking again.

"Well, at least he's not an idiot." I chided and Emilie smacked my arm. I chuckled and looked over at her. "Who's Abigail?" I asked and she sighed deeply.

"Why don't we take this to the living room?" she suggested and I nodded.

I had a feeling this wasn't going to be a good conversation.

* * *

The silence was almost unbearable as we entered and got seated in the living room. I knew he wasn't going to like this story.

"Abigail was my mother, Richie." I told him and he frowned. "Not my real one but she was. When I was taken away, no one wanted to adopt me. I was bounced from foster family to foster family all over Massachusetts. Abi came when I was 12 and adopted me. I was with her until right before my 18th birthday. She took care of me, she loved me and she was everything that I know mom would have been. She was a good woman."

"What happened?" he asked slowly.

"We were in a car accident and she didn't make it. We were going to dinner because I had just gotten my license." I told him with a sad smile. "I tried to save her but she was gone."

"I'm sorry, Em." he whispered and I could hear the tears in his voice.

"I was in the hospital and they were going to put me back in foster care but Jack's mother showed up, Evelyn." I smiled and he looked over at me. "She took me home and that's where I met Jack and his brothers. I lived with her until I moved out in August."

"You've lived with your boyfriend?" he asked, looking a little peeved. I laughed and shook my head.

"No, Jack left. All except Jerry left actually. Angel went to war right after my birthday. Bobby went somewhere and Jack moved to LA." I explained trying to hold back my tears. That time was still a sore subject for me. "They all came back when Evelyn was murdered." Richie's head shot to me and his mouth was open.

"What?" he whispered.

"She was killed a few days before Thanksgiving. We went to the store to get the turkey and it was robbed." I told him and he gaped at me.

"You were there?" he asked and I nodded. "God, Em, I'm so sorry."

"It's okay. It brought everyone back together in the end. And I was able to repay Jack." I smiled.

"Repay him for what?" he asked.

"Everything. He was my only shelter after Abi died. He helped me so much, Richie, and I got to help him out in return. He was there when I needed someone the most and, even though it meant loosing Evelyn, I got to do the same for him." I smiled and Richie gripped my hand.

"You're making it real hard for me to hate him, ya know?" he joked and I laughed.

"Good because we don't need any more trouble!" I giggled. "We've been through enough." Richie sighed and shook his head with a smirk.

"Alright, I get it." he said.

"So how have you been? What have you been up to? Tell me, tell me." I grinned and he chuckled.

"Well, I'm almost done with med-school." he smiled and I clapped my hands. "Thanks. I'm going to be a pediatrician. Hence, my handy band aide skills." he joked and pointed to my arm.

He told me about high school and how he graduated early and I told him about my homeschooling and about me going to college also. He told me about Kris how they met in high school and have been together ever since. He grinned like a fool when he told me they were getting married in July and invited me, Jack and Jack's family to come alone. He told me about his falling out with our Aunt and I told him about our road trip and our visit to her.

We talked about everything under the moon and barely noticed Jack and Kris walking by and going into the kitchen. It was then that I told him Jack could cook. He was happy about that saying that he didn't want me doing all the housework.

I think I was slowly getting him to like Jack.


	33. The End

_When you feel all alone  
And the world has turned its back on you  
Give me a moment please to tame your wild, wild heart  
I know you feel like the walls are closing in on you  
It's hard to find relief and people can be so cold_

_When darkness is upon your door and you feel like you can't take anymore_

_Let me be the one you call  
If you jump I'll break your fall  
Lift you up and fly away with you into the night  
If you need to fall apart  
I can mend a broken heart  
If you need to crash then crash and burn  
You're not alone_

_When you feel all alone  
And a loyal friend is hard to find  
You're caught in a one way street  
With the monsters in your head  
When hopes and dreams are far away and  
You feel like you can't face the day_

_Let me be the one you call  
If you jump I'll break your fall  
Lift you up and fly away with you into the night  
If you need to fall apart  
I can mend a broken heart  
If you need to crash then crash and burn  
You're not alone_

_'Cause there has always been heartache and pain  
And when it's over you'll breathe again  
You'll breath again_

_When you feel all alone  
And the world has turned its back on you  
Give me a moment please  
To tame your wild wild heart_

_Let me be the one you call  
If you jump I'll break your fall  
Lift you up and fly away with you into the night  
If you need to fall apart  
I can mend a broken heart  
If you need to crash then crash and burn  
You're not alone_

* * *

I never thought that my life would be this much of a roller coaster. My birth parents didn't want me but I found some that did. From them I got my brother and a lot of special memories. Unfortunately, memories are all I had left of them for a long time. They were all taken away from me and I was thrown into foster care. After a few homes, an angel found me and took me in. She didn't try to be my mother but she ended up being just that. She loved me and took care of me like my adoptive mother would have. She made me whole. However, she too was taken away from me right before I was 18. That day was a deal sealer for me.

I was cursed. I was cursed to live a life of loving people and loosing them. It would start out all bright and delightful but would end in flames when I crashed and burned. After Abigail's death I vowed never to get close to anyone ever again but I guess the Man above didn't like that too much. I'm guessing he was finally taking pity on me when he sent Jack and hi family my way. Granted, that was smooth either seeing as I almost lost Jack twice and did loose Evelyn. For the most part though, it was great.

Jack taught me how to love again and then he showed me that I wasn't cursed. He helped me to learn to trust again. He showed me that, even if no one else was there for me, he would always be here. He'd pick me up when I was down and fix me when I was broken even if it meant breaking him in the process.

I didn't just learn from Jack though. I learned something from everyone that I encountered on my, so far, short life journey. They taught me important life lessons and they helped me realize who I really was.

I was not the girl who was curse. I was blessed because I had met some of the most amazing people on this Earth and not a lot of people can say that. I was not a pessimistic person anyone. I don't wait for bad things I happen anymore. I live life for each unexpected thing that gets thrown my way because I know that it's been thrown at me for a reason and I know that it wouldn't have been given to me if He didn't believe I wasn't strong enough to over come it.

No one has to tell me that I'm a different person that I was two and a half years ago. I can see and feel it for myself. My life is great and it keeps getting better.

* * *

"I want to thank all of you for coming. This means a lot to Kris and I that you would take the time to be here on our wedding day. We've worked long and hard to get it right so thank you all." Richie grinned and every clapped. Kris stood up next to him and looked over at me.

"I do want to add that if it wasn't for Em this wouldn't have possible. I would have gone crazy without her. So thanks, Em." she smiled and I winked at her.

It was true. I found out quickly that my brother didn't have a creative bone in his body. He could barely match his socks much much less pick out matching China for the reception. It was hard planning a wedding when the couple lived in Salem and I lived in Detroit but we managed. Jack and I made frequent trips and I even convinced my plane fearing brother to hop on one and come visit me.

I was really happy when everyone got along. Of course, Angel and Richie took to each other very fast. They conversed about me mostly and they seemed happy about that. If anyone was my brother in the Mercer family it was Angel. That made a serious friendship between him and Richie. Jerry was excited to say that he knew a doctor and the girls loved to hear him talk about his stories, with PG ratings of course. Camille even put on a happy face and questioned my brother on everything from coughs to cuts for the girls. He was her own personal pediatrician over the phone. Bobby was...well, he was Bobby. He took to call Richie a fairy like eh did Jack. When I asked why he said that they both were too picky about their hair. How can you not love Bobby?

But the wedding slowly but surely came together a mere 6 months after my reunion with Richie. In that time I had also finished my first complete year of college and was going back in September. Paisley had moved in with her new boyfriend, Frasier, and they were happy. Jack's band played at random gigs in town and surrounding towns. He even left some weekend to go to New York to perform. We were just lucky he got paid good for these gigs or we wouldn't be able to afford it.

Yes, we.

Jack officially moved in with me a few days after we got back from our trip. We did good. I yelled at him for leaving his dirty socks around and he yelled at me for leaving puddles of water on the bathroom floor after my hour long showers. After a few 'no hot water' fights, we agreed to shower together. Not that it was a long discussion. We are young after all.

"So you have decorating taste." Jack stated as we danced. I smiled up at him and nodded.

"Yes, I do." I agreed. "I enjoyed it though. It was nice to be able to mix and match and bring it all together. It turned out nice." I smiled and looked around the room.

"You did great, Diddle." he whispered and kissed my lips softly. I melted. I still do and always will. Jack has that effect on me. The tiny of kisses and smalled of touches will send me to a puddle on the floor. I loved every minute of it though.

I simply loved him. H saved me, he fixed and he completed me.

What more could a girl ask for?

"Em?" Jack whispered. I looked up at him again and tilted my head. He looked nervous.

"Yeah?" I asked.

"You know I love you, right? That I would do anything for to, do anything to protect you, right?" he asked and I nodded my head, a little confused as to what he was trying to get at.

"Of course, Jackie." I told him. He took a deep breath and I looked down wen he stuffed his hand in his pocket. He pulled out a tiny box and my breath caught.

"I wannna marry you, Em. I know I've been against it but I can't imagine me with anyone else but you." he whispered and slowly opened the box. My eyes looked up to his scared ones and back down at the diamond ring he was holding.

"Will you marry me?"

* * *

**If you kill me or harm me, you might never get the answer...lol. The sequel will be called Forever & Always and will be out as soon I can get it out. I wanna get at least 5 chapters done of my other stories and then start the sequel. Thank you to all who have followed this and reviewd. It means so much to me!! Thank you, thank you, thank you!!! :)**


	34. AN Sequel

Hello again old friends. I said I'd give everyone a heads up when the sequel was going to get posted soon and I'm happy to say...

**Forgive & Forget** will be posted within the next two or three days. It's going to be a whole new story line. I'm making it so that even if no one read _Crash & Burn _they can still read the sequel. It will have the same cast and people but a HUGE surprise.

Forgive & Forget will be about Jack this time around. We will get a full fledge peek into his past. Like he helped Emilie in C&B, Emilie will help him in F&F. I won't spill what he needs help with just yet though. You'll get that when you read the prologue.

Some of you might not like what I do with this story but it's what I think Jack fears the most in life. Emilie's was loving people in fear of loosing them and now we'll work with Jack. I won't be offended if no one likes it but I think it's a good way to write it. Things won't be as perfect as they were in C&B. Thigns will get dirty and rough. But it's all a good outcome in the end.

So if you are going to interested in seeing more of Jack and Emilie keep your eyes open for **Forgive & Forget. **I'll post another AN when I post the Prologue. :)


	35. Sequel Posted!

The Sequel is UP!!! You can go to my profile and get to it from there or you can follow this URL addy. Be sure to remove the spaces.

http : // www . fanfiction . net / s / 5084718 / 1 / Forgive_Forget

The Prologue is up and the first chapter will be posted later today. :)


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